Chapter 5

The next day, I woke up fidgeting. "Where are my babies?" The question fell from my mouth before I could stop it. My voice was slipping a thread of panic. I didn't expect an answer, didn't even expect anything but silence; however, the stillness that followed from Nurse Rin was a sharp answer in itself. A pang of pain that they weren't here. The weight of the realization slammed into me. My mind is already fractured, beginning to fold in on itself, and the edges of my thoughts are blurring into darkness. I didn't cry, I think I hadn't cried in weeks, it was as though my tears had been used up by grief, by confusion, by the unraveling of the thought I understood. It seems that even without tears, the hollow ache inside me spread like a virus, dulling everything in its path. "Where are they?" I whispered, barely audible as the words escaped me, that I could almost believe the answer was a matter of waiting.