Chapter 81 Don't Give Up

When Santichai walked into Asnee's ward, he saw Asnee lying motionless on the bed, very pale. He stood in the corner of the room, trying not to disturb the Siriporns. He didn't know how long he stood at the corner, waiting for Asnee to wake up, until the door opened, and Decha walked in with Tipkamore and Young.

Tipkamol walked up to the Siriporns, "Auntie and uncle, you two can go back to rest. Since I'm here, I'll take care of Pi Nee."

Mrs. Siriporn said, "Thank you."

Decha said, "Don't worry, he is in the hospital, although we are there, we can't help him much. Auntie and uncle need to rest, if Asnee wakes up, and the two of you become sick, it will not be good for Asnee's recovery."

Mr. Siriporn said, "Ma, Frank is right, let's go get some rest."

Mrs. Siriporn stood up and said, "Frank, if anything happens while we're away, you must call us right away."

Decha smiled at the Siriporns and said, "I will."

After the Siriporns left the room, Tipkamol stood up and said, "Me and Pi Yang will also be leaving, let us know if you need anything." She looked at Santichai. "Santichai, Pi Yang and I decided to leave for Japan when Asnee's condition improved."

Santichai smiled and said, "Congratulations to you and Pi Yang."

Tipkamol smiled, "Thank you."

Decha smiled and said, "Keep in touch, all right."

When Tipkamol opened the door and walked out, she stopped at the door. She said, "Pi K...?"

KK, who was still wearing a hospital gown, looked at Tipkamol in surprise and asked, "Mol, what are you doing here? Who is hospitalized?"

Tipkamol said, "A friend is in the hospital. Pi Yang and I are just visiting."

KK and Tipkamol began to walk away, while Yang slowly followed them.

The moment Santichai heard KK's voice, he glanced through the crack of the open door and saw KK standing in front of Tipkamol and Yang. He didn't know how long he stared at KK through the open cracked door, even after the door closed, he still stared at the closed door. It wasn't until Decha cleared his throat that Santichai looked at Decha.

Decha asked irritably, "Do you still miss him?"

Santichai looked at Decha and said, "I think I wronged him in some way."

Decha said, "If so, why do you come back to Ai Nee." He stood up and faced Santichai. "Or because you also feel wronged for leaving Ai Nee, so you are here to give Ai Nee hope and make yourself feel better?"

Santichai looked at Decha awkwardly, "What are you implying to?"

Decha said, "If you don't want to come back to Ai Nee, I can understand, but don't pretend to forgive him and leave later."

Santichai walked over to the bed and sat on the chair next to Asnee. He took Asnee's hand and said, "I'm not." He smiled. "I respect KK very much. KK is a very sensible person, but that doesn't mean I will fall in love with him." He kissed Asnee's hand, and then focused his attention back on Asnee.

Decha sat next to Santichai and said, "I'm afraid you will leave Ai Nee. You saw it yourself how crazy he gets when he learns you're dating another guy."

Santichai turned to Decha and smiled, "Frank, I don't want to leave him, but I know I have to leave him one day."

Decha asked, "What do you mean?"

"I assure the Siriporns that once Asnee is back to normal and fully recovered, I will leave Asnee and have no further contact with Asnee," Santichai said.

Decha grabbed Santichai's hand angrily. "What do you mean?"

Santichai said, "Frank, someone like me, has nothing to offer to anyone, not even the ones I love...I totally understand the intentions of the Siriporns. If I had a son who I love dearly, I wouldn't want my son to suffer."

Decha asked, "Are they threatening you?"

Santichai shook his head, "No... they didn't threaten me or chase me away with money, they were just expressing their concerns." He kissed Asnee's hand. "While I mustered up the courage to claim that he was mine, I haven't forgotten that Asnee is also their beloved son."

Decha sighed, "If Ai Nee knew about this...he'd be heartbroken."

Santichai said, "I'll try to make him understand. I secretly hope he'll forget me when he wakes up, and if he forgets me, that's for the best."

"You'll be someone he won't forget," Decha said. Decha looked at Santichai. "Ai Chai, you know this is not what Ai Nee wants, you know by doing this, it will hurt him."

"Frank, I've learned over the years that to love someone, I don't need to be there," Santichai said. "It doesn't diminish my love for Asnee. As long as I still love him in my heart, I can love him from a distance, but this time I will go with peace of mind, because I know that Asnee loves me just as much as I love him."

Decha said, "I don't understand. I don't understand why you and Asnee must sacrifice for each other happiness."

"Neither did I, but it was something that had to be done," Santichai said. "Sometimes I wonder if khun Siriporn and khun nai Siriporn would hate me this much if I was born into a wealthy family and a young master like you." He wiped his tears. "But I'm not lucky enough because all I can offer Asnee is love; love that can't be eaten. Everything I own can fit in a suitcase and a duffel bag. So, I see why khun Siriporn and khun nai Siriporn don't want me with Asnee."

Decha said, "Ai Chai, Ai Nee once told me that you only know the hurt, he caused you, but you don't know the hurt you caused him. I don't know what auntie and uncle said to you, but I know that if you leave Ai Nee, hell will break loose. You saw it yourself; if you're not with him, he'd rather die."

Santichai said, "I know, so from now on, if that person is not him, I will not love another person."

In his deep sleep, Asnee heard many voices, but he couldn't understand what was just said. He felt that his body was heavy, and it was difficult to move around. Then he felt someone pinching his right hand. He squeezed his hand to make the other person realize that he could hear them. Then he heard Santichai's voice. He blinked a few times and slowly opened his eyes.

Asnee muttered, "Chai..."

Santichai kissed Asnee's hand and said, "I'm here."

Asnee muttered to himself again, "Chai...."

Santichai stood up and kissed Asnee on the forehead, "I'm here." Santichai watched Asnee fall asleep again.

Decha smiles at Santichai and Asnee. He asked, "Chai... do you really like men?"

Santichai turned to Decha and said, "I'm not gay, I only like Asnee. As long as the person I love is Asnee, it doesn't matter if that person is a man or a woman."

"You know Asnee is gay," Decha said.

"Do we really have to label people based on their sexual orientation?" Santichai asked. "I disagree with labelling individuals because we are all human and breathe the same air with the same internal body organs."

Decha said, "I agree with you."

"I'm not that smart, but I think if two people love each other and don't hurt anyone, we should respect their freedom of choice and we shouldn't invade their privacy," Santichai said.

Decha chuckled, "I don't remember you being so talkative." He scoffed and shook his head at Santichai. "Who is your teacher?"

Santichai said, "KK taught me."

Decha scoffed, "This young master of the Suwannarat family is quite interesting, and I think it would be good to establish a relationship with him."

"KK is a good friend and a very sensible person," Santichai said. "Being friends with KK will only benefit you. If you have the chance, try to be friends with KK."

Decha laughed, "I'll take your word for it. Hey, I'll go get something to eat. Do you want me to get anything for you?"

Santichai shook his head, "No."

Decha put his hand on Santichai's shoulder, "I'll go get you something to eat. If you think of anything else you want to eat, call me."

Santichai nodded with a smile, "Mmm."

Decha, "It won't be long." He walked out of the room.

Santichai looked at Asnee and kissed his hand. He murmured, "If one day you wake up and don't see me sleeping beside you, you can't give up." Tears slowly flowed down his pale cheeks. "You must come looking for me. I will wait for you with open arms where we always belonged, where a single smile has always been enough for us. The place that we could see our future through the tears in our eyes." He lowered his head lying on the bed, pulled Asnee's hand to his chest, and held Asnee's hand tightly. "Anyone can say 'I love you', but not everyone can prove it's true. Therefore, you must not give up and come find me."