[89.4] Even If It Kills Me

********Disclaimer: This chapter contains mild mentions of a mutilated corpse.

[Author's note: This chapter is back to Reika's perspective]

As I took a step towards Vira, darkness enveloped me as if I was surrounded by shadows. Yet, my body was covered in a bright light.

Vira was being held by the second Reika. She ruthlessly held onto her by the hair while her other hand was clawed deep into the skin of Vira's shoulder. Decay spread down the arm slowly, withering it away. As much as Vira tried to use her magic, she found something was blocking her.

The moment Vira had nearly stabbed the sword into Zephyr, two people had appeared out of thin air. One had grabbed the sword with her bare hand and siphoned the power out. While the other grabbed onto Vira and pulled her back by the hair to force her into a kneeling posture.

"Who am I?" Seeing her look so subservient filled me with delight as I stood before her, "I am the one you once called a Great Fairy. I am the mother of Zephyr, Astra, Lene, Koale, Atta, Rose, Lovi, and Moni. I am the daughter of Della and Aldrich Marlow. And the wife of Cyrus Orphelio." 

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Cyrus, who now stood on top of the rubble, watching silently. When he heard this, his expression changed from surprise to a blush. It had been so long since I'd seen that expression on his face. I giggled, "Although maybe I'm getting ahead of myself."

Cyrus slid down the rubble and approached me slowly as he scratched his head from embarrassment, "...Reika."

Surprisingly, he didn't look confused by the presence of the two Reika's who now looked strikingly similar.

Seeing the affectionate and bashful gaze on Cyrus's face, Zephyr was shocked by a sudden realization. "R-R-Reika?"

I took a deep breath and faced Zephyr. He was now staring at me with a wide mouth and huge eyes as if trying to figure out an impossible math problem. To my relief, he wasn't staring at me with feelings of betrayal as I had expected. But the relief turned into fury when I fully took in the beating and trouble Vira had put him through. Blood, dirt, and grime were covering his face, hiding fierce bruises and cuts.

Ah, so dirty.

Without a care, I used my sleeve to rub it off.

"Hey, buddy."

"Y-You… You…" 

His eyes darted side to side as he tried to think of what to say to me. I waited patiently and watched his expression as he tried to come up with his next words.

"It's… I… You…"

"Yes?"

"You… You are… You're my… My…"

"Mhm."

"B-But you can't be- you're not- I would have- but you didn't-" I could see his eyes swirling as he tried to rationalize the irrational. Finally, he couldn't handle it anymore and screeched, "WHAT DOES ALL THIS MEAN! I DON'T UNDERSTAND!! Are you my mother or are you my friend?!"

I hummed as I looked up to the sky, "Both, I guess?"

"Both!?"

I reached out to squeeze his cheeks, "We grew up as siblings, became best friends, then I accidentally fell through time and became the Great Fairy… Your mother."

He let me squeeze his cheeks, but he only looked more confused, "I… I watched you die on the mountain… If… If you weren't dead then how…"

"Technically I did die."

He stared at me with a blank face.

"I don't really know how I was saved, but I woke up in the same spot on the mountain just a few days ago…"

"So then… The masked person at the meeting… The ice dragon… Those were all you?"

"Mhm. That was me." I rubbed the top of his head, "You were right."

"B-B-But your b-body was still there-"

"-It's still there."

His expression blanked again.

I glanced around, "I see you were busy today… Why did you fight with Vira? Why didn't you run away?"

"I… I… I was trying to protect the Academy… And… And the children… And-And- Hazel-" Tears started pooling up in his eyes, "But I didn't do a very good job…"

I pulled him into a hug, "Zephyr… I'm so glad you're safe."

"B-But H-H-Hazel… Hazel is…" He suddenly burst into tears, "Hazel is dead! I couldn't do anything to help her! She tried so hard to protect me and in the end, I could do nothing to help her!"

Hearing his mournful tone, my heart felt like it was shattering into a hundred pieces. Even my own tears started to form as I listened to his cries on my shoulder.

"What am I going to do!? I can't lose her again! I can't!!"

I rubbed his back to soothe him, "Zephyr… You really loved her, didn't you?"

"I did! I really did!"He buried his head deeper into my chest, "I love her! I love her so much that I can't imagine losing her all again! Not after everything that happened! I-I love her with every ounce I can! Why couldn't I die instead of her?! I want her back so badly! I would do anything!! I would give anything!!! After everything, I owe her so much… I can't let things end like this… I can't… I don't want to be alone again…"

I ran my hand through his soft hair just as I had when he was small enough to be carried, "You don't have to be alone anymore. I'm here now and I won't leave you again."

The second Reika spoke, "...Hazel can be here too."

We both exchanged a look as he choked on his sobs, "W-What? Y-You know of a way?"

"There's a way, but there's a price to pay."

His grief-stricken face showed a sense of hope, "I-I will pay any price!"

A weak smile flashed on her face, "But what if you aren't the one who will pay the price? What if she is the one?"

"I… I don't know…" His eyes lowered as he searched his heart for an answer he could never find.

I reached out to rub his head, "If you choose not to, Abadi might send her back… Or she might not."

He pressed his lips together and tightened his fists, "What is the price?"

"She might become like the Swordmaster…" The second Reika lowered her voice, "She might even become like Orphelio."

"What do you mean?"

"There's two routes to immortality. Necromancy and by defying the rules of this world. Bodies in those situations will face a punishment. Those brought back from the dead will never be able to die. Eventually, they will no longer be the person they were before. If you bring her back without her consent, she might resent you."

His body started to tremble, "D-Do you think she'll resent me?"

I met his anxious gaze and asked, "Do you think she would?"

"I… I don't know."

"Then… If the role was opposite, would you resent her?"

"No! Never!" His head snapped up without hesitation, "I would never resent her! I would understand!"

My cheeks warmed as a smile surfaced, "Are you willing to bet on your love? Or do you want to let go and grieve?"

"I… I… I want to try!" He wiped away his tears, "What should I do?"

The second Reika smiled, but the look on her face made it seem like she was already expecting this answer. She replied calmly, "Vira has two hearts. One that belongs to a mortal that holds no magical affinity, and another one that holds all of her power."

"SHUT UP! SHUT UP SHUT UP!" Vira tried to bite the second Reika, but she dug her nails into Vira's skin. Instantly, her arm started shriveling up and decaying, "AAAAAAAAH!"

The second Reika ignored her screams and continued, "Her second heart holds all the holy magic which it makes it indestructible and immortal. That's why she was always coming back no matter what injuries she faced. However, if you remove it, then she will be a mortal with no magical affinity. If you give her heart to another, their body will become immortal and indestructible as well… However, if they are already dead-"

The second Reika looked over at Hazel's body which had the arms cut off and dull eyes staring lifelessly up at the sky.

"-If they are dead, then there will only be the immortal and indestructible heart."

I understood and gave a faint nod, "That's why she could become like Orphelio or the Swordmaster."

She won't be able to die unless the heart is removed.

She won't age.

She won't change.

When Vira realized what we were planning to do, she grew fiercer, "GET OFF! GET OFF ME YOU B*TCH!" 

The second Reika pulled her hair tighter, "Shut up, will you?"

Vira wrestled and spat, "HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?! NO ONE SHOULD KNOW THAT!"

"Because I'm from the future and have already been through all this." She rolled her eyes, "Now be quiet as Zephyr chooses your fate."

I turned to Zephyr, "...Well? What do you want to do?"

He wiped away his tears and glared at Vira, "As Alora's mother, you never gave her love or affection. The least you can do now is give your daughter your heart."

"There you have it." I let Zephyr go and walked over to Cyrus who was staring at me in surprise to see he had my attention. I held my hand out to him, "Dagger."

He flinched from my sudden acknowledgment, "Huh?"

"Can I have a dagger? I want to cut open her chest and take her heart."

"..."

Hearing him pause, I turned to him with a sly smile, "Is that wrong? This woman killed my children and thought there was nothing wrong with it."

"Not at all. I was just thinking whether a dull blade or a sharp blade would be better." A mischievous smile crossed his face, "It would be more painful for her if we used the dull blade, which I wouldn't mind, but I don't want your hand to get tired from the effort."

I laughed at him, "This is why I love you."

He paused for a moment before averting his face and coughing. I laughed louder when I realized he was trying to hide his red cheeks.

I motioned with my hand, "Just give me a sharp one. I want to touch her as little as possible."

Once he gave me the blade, Vira started thrashing. Cyrus and the second Reika quickly jumped to the aid to hold her down as I held the knife.

"YOU CAN'T TAKE IT! YOU B*TCH! WENCH! WH*RE!"

My face twitched in irritation, "You should be thanking me for being merciful rather than as brutal as you have been."

I plunged the knife into her chest, taking extra care not to damage any organs. Vira couldn't feel pain, but she screamed regardless as it was the only way to vent her anger.

As I carved through her sternum, I surprisingly didn't feel much sympathy or guilt.

Maybe it was because she killed my children.

Maybe it was because of how she treated Hazel.

Or I was just becoming numb.

…Well, it was probably all three.

Once her chest was opened, I took a deep breath and pulled out the golden heart. It resisted the force, but ultimately it was not as strong as myself. The golden strings holding it in her chest finally snapped. Her skin and hair lost its luster, but her eyes stared hungrily at the beating heart.

Vira screamed in anguish, "GIVE IT BACK! I'M A GOD! I'M A GOD!"

I held her beating heart with no sympathy, and in fact, her wailing only made me feel pleased. I found myself wanting to listen to her scream even more.

…Maybe I am becoming twisted.

"Whether Hazel comes back or not-" I walked back over to Zephyr and handed the beating heart over, "Ultimately, you choose."

His hands shook as he took it, "What… What do I need to do?"

We all looked at the second Reika who explained, "Remove her old heart and replace it with the new one."

Zephyr's hands shook as he turned to face Hazel's mutilated corpse. As he brought the knife to her chest, his face turned extremely pale.

Fearing he would faint, I rubbed his back. "You can do it."

"B-But…" His frightened eyes looked into mine, "I-I don't want to hurt her."

"You're not going to hurt her. This will save her."

"Save her… Save her, right." He turned back to her body trembling uncontrollably as he talked to calm himself, "She's not alive. This won't kill her. This will save her. I can do this. I can do this. I-I can do this-"

As soon as he made the first cut, he turned to the side and vomited. I sat beside him rubbing his back as he spat it out. No one else moved to help him so he struggled to finish the job. Once the heart was replaced, we all watched in amazement as Hazel's body started to glow. Her limbs reattached, but then something strange started happening.

Her legs began to grow and her chest deflated. Her cheekbones grew sharper, her double eyelids turned tapered, and her rounded features became more pronounced and oval. Even her thick brown hair that was usually kept in two thick braids thinned out and scattered, turning into long platinum blonde hair.

She looked just as she had the last day I saw her on the mountain.

She looked like Alora.

A replica of my voice came from behind, "Now it's all up to Hazel."

As my body twisted to look at the second Reika for answers, my eyes widened in shock. I whispered, "Ah… So that's how it is…"

The future Reika smiled warmly as her body started to turn transparent, "...That's how it is."

As she closed her eyes, her existence was finally erased from the world.