if you do not mind

*****

Tonight looks like it's going to be a long one. Rania, who had wanted to sleep, was forced to keep her eyes open. Rian invited him to chat and asked many things.

"How was your home life before, are you happy?"

"Haha... what a strange question? If I was happy, there's no way I would be here."

"That's right. You're not going to tell me?"

"You really want to know?"

"Erm."

Rani was silent for a moment. "My ex-husband is just an ordinary person, we met when I went on vacation to Japan. An accidental meeting and we got acquainted. Two months later we got married in his hometown. At first I thought my marriage was very happy, my in-laws also look good."

Ryan listened carefully. Grows annoyed when Rania said about marriage.

"He works in an import-export company, I don't know what part. He never tells much about his work. In the first year of marriage it was still fine. Until when I was pregnant, we chose to live alone. After our child was born, he suddenly changed, never paid attention. Whenever there was a problem he never told me. My mother-in-law always told me. When she lost her job, our savings were used up for living expenses."

"Have you ever had a hard time?"

"Yes, and we ended up fighting a lot. I invited him back here. However, he refused and chose to stay at his mother's house. I started to be treated unfairly, looked down upon by my mother-in-law and brother-in-law. I was considered the unlucky one in the family. Then I decided to go home with my son on the grounds that I missed Mama, and we parted ways." Rania took a deep breath and ended her story.

Even if the story is just an outline. Rian quite understands that Rania is very unhappy. How much pressure did the woman feel? How often does he feel neglected? Rian deeply regretted and regretted their first separation.

"Why did he change?"

"I don't know, maybe because of the incitement from his family who blamed me, he lost his job." There was no expression on the woman's face, she looked relaxed and had accepted the reality.

"Why are they blaming you?" Her voice trembled, her anger churned in a heart-wrenching tale.

"Because they thought after we got married my ex-husband always backed off at his job. They thought I was bad luck."

"Nothing like that. Maybe he lost his job because of his own fault!" Rian seemed to be holding back his anger.

"Maybe it's because they still have that belief that I'm being blamed. I never know anything, maybe that's the reason."

"Is he light-handed?"

"Not at all, but he's come home drunk a few times. Because I don't like it, we often sleep separately."

"You don't like alcohol?" he asked curiously.

"No longer."

"Not anymore? So you liked him?" Ryan furrowed his brows.

"Once upon a time, when I was in Germany."

"Germany? What kind of life did you live in Germany?" The man looked enthusiastic.

“Hahaha… do I have to tell you that one too?” He glared, reluctant to continue

"If you do not mind."

"Oow ... no, all you ask is about my first marriage. For that I still can't tell you."

"Does it really hurt? You must have gone through something bad, your wound must still be there, and you just want to bury it. Is that so?"

"Yes you could say so." Rania nodded slowly and turned her gaze to the ceiling.

"Oh my God, Ra. What horrible thing have you been through? I can't imagine how much you suffered. If we hadn't been apart like that, maybe you wouldn't have suffered." Rian pulled Rania in his arms. Imagining the suffering like what Rania had gone through. He held back the tears that were about to fall.

"You regret?" Rania's face was right on the man's chest.

"Yeah, I'm sorry. I didn't get to tell you that I love you so much. I'm sorry my love came so late to you." He inhaled the fragrance of the top of Rania's head, then kissed it many times.

"There's nothing to be sorry for, Ri. God has divided the path of human life fairly, the destiny of each has been determined. Can meet and part just like that, then will meet again," he explained in a low and soft voice.

"Yes, you are right. Maybe after our meeting this time, God will destined us to be together."

"Erm, I hope so. Only God knows."

Ryan was silent for a moment. "What's his name, that irresponsible man. Do you still love him?"

"Anjas. I don't know, love can come and go at any time,"

"You used to say that, 'true love will bind the soul, fill all thoughts. Love has its own space in the heart.' How is it, is your soul bound to his love, so you will continue to think about it?" His arms tightened, a low voice waiting for an answer.

"You want to know?" Rania pushed their bodies slightly away.

"What?"

"Only one love can bind a person's soul. Its place will not change in the heart. That is true love, true love. While other love, can be anywhere in the heart. It can come and go just like that," he said. while pointing to the chest, right where the heart.

"So your soul isn't tied at all?" Rian asked curiously.

"Um, I don't know." Rania shrugged her shoulders. "According to you?"

The man looked up with conviction. "If not, I will bind your soul." Rian hugged the woman again, leaning Rania's head against her chest which was beating fast.

'It's been a long time Rian… it's just that I've kept it, the key to my heart is missing somewhere. You have to find him first,' Rania thought, she closed her eyes. The man's heartbeat made him feel calm.

"Emmm..." he answered quietly. Rania has yawned several times, her eyes are already very sleepy.

"I will make you queen. Make you happy for the rest of my life." Rian continued softly, not replying."

"Can you tell me about your daughter? She must be beautiful like you, what's her name?"

The man still seemed to want to hear the story. But his eyes really couldn't be compromised anymore. Finally, Rania fell asleep.

"Hey, Ra… why are you quiet? Rania…."

Rian peeked up his head slightly, it turned out that Rania was sleeping. He smiled, leading her hand around his waist. Rania subconsciously tightened her arms. Rian kissed Rania's forehead and lips briefly.

"Go to sleep, we still have plenty of time to tell everything," he whispered.

For a long time Rian looked at the beautiful face of his idol woman. He caressed every corner of the face. The forehead, eyebrows, eyes, nose, cheeks to those thin lips. Rian really admires Rania's beauty. He smiled repeatedly, holding Rania's chin he kissed her lips again and again, Rian didn't feel enough. Rania moaned for a moment, but didn't wake her up. Then Rian deepened the kiss into small crush after crush. Until he was quite satisfied. His eyes began to close, not long Rian fell asleep.

*****