11th! aftermath ,mother hidden feelings

*birds noises in the morning*

"hmm.." I began to wake up from the noise outside , I clutch my hand then it caught a springy,soft flesh pillow

"ahnn~" a sweet moaning can be heard , I start to play with it wantonly

"hnn~ ... good morning tai-chan , you seems...annh~ extra energetic today.." mother moaning between her words, goddam how much time I must wait to ravage her sinful body...

and damn Bonney refuse to age me with excuse "it won't feel genuine if we done like that" which is right , but the mental frustration torture me , it's like prevent you from drink water in the desert

the only thing I hopful that the fruit some how decrease the time for me 'mature'

patience..patience..use this to hone your will power...mantra ..mantra..

speaking of which , my will power become high leveled! I don't know how much this scales , but on personal level , I feel if decided to do something, I will definitely achieve it! , in addition now I can perfectly control my CoC,albait it will be a bit weaker than yesterday , I guess the heat of the moment contributed in that , matter not , I become to straighten it by pressuring sea monsters as well as humans.

oh and I got 500 EE , neat! speaking of essential energy , there is a lot of factors on how it calculated, simply doing the same exercise won't cut it, the more unique the activity I am doing , the more I get , also the difficulty of the action counts too , when doing something unique for the first time, gives the most, after that , it slowly decrease until it stops at minimal point,but no action gives zero point, moreover , taking damage also gives EE , as in when receiving damage I take energy from whatever action fell upon on me, but same rules applies in this situation , I can't just keep hitting my face in the hope I gained more points..

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after the lewd morning , we continue our day normally , of course I didn't forget to send sticky fingers to cut the sea monster corpse , using knives and super speed should take care of the job , sadly it can't open zipper in the air , I'm still working on that , if I able to achieve that , I basically have the whole atmosphere as my pocket.

until then it cut the sizable see monster which wight dozens of tones into thousands of dish size piece , then open a zipper on a small rock and throw everything there, it's meat should satisfies us for months, it may be sound that thousands of pieces my last longer , but my existence and Bonney should reduce that time by a lot!

while I thinking about random things.. I noticed my mom a bit mind absent "mom? something wrong? you don't like the meat?" I ask, we currently at the dinner table eating the the seasoned sea monster I killed , and boy it's tasty as hell , I mean I don't have Sanji level cooking skills just yet but I pretty much can beat any master chief judge with an omelette dish,

my goal to reach soma level , seeing mother and Bonney clothes get destroyed and having foodgasm would be a sight to hold..

bonney who is devour the meat like vacuum also notice this and got curious about what take our mother mind "what up mom? wanna share you burden this is?" bonney asks with a full mouth

"ah! sorry sweethearts , I was lost in something, yes the meat is melting in my mouth~ so tender~" mother try acts like usual but we caught her

"mom , please speak up and share it with us" I asks with share her mind

my mother looks down and sighed "..Taiger..do feel that your mother is useless..?" mom ask with bitter tone

"what..mom..? what give that impression? is there something I did or said?" I ask with confused tone , I always try to look after her in everyway I can, I don't recall anytime I disappointed her in anyway, she always cheerful and kind a bit clumsy and sometimes airhead , but every part of her I love dearly, so seeing her like this pains my heart..

"no no no sweety , you never did such thing, you always spoil me with your love, that why don't doubt yourself, honey" she shake her head repeatedly and denied strongly

"then why mom feel that why?" bonney asks

mom rub Bonney head with affection while looking at me smiles and said "..it's just..you have always have been a genius , since when been an infant and until now..you crawled at 1 month ..and walked at 5 month..and spoke albait brokenly at 9 months..you even could go to bathroom in your own before completing at year...you didn't cry..if you wanted attention you just made some word noise to seek me , at first..I was happy to have such genius boy..it filled me with pride seeing my child that can and will achieve great things.." she pause a bit ,her eyes a bit wet and continue

"and you still do , even now , and I believe you will continue..to do so.." she looks at me proudly

"mom..." I say

"but..this exactly why I feel so useless...I don't think I were able to fill my duties as your mother..not because I couldn't to..but simply enough..you didn't need to..your were good at anything do..you didn't need any guidance, your mistakes were minimal and never repeat them..in fact.. sometimes I think if I weren't to be at your side..your life wouldn't that much of difference" she silently tears up

"no no mom that's..not..true.." I try my hardest to deny it but deep down I know I'm lying to myself and she notices it..and smiles sadly

"hehe..see.. even if you tried to deny it..you know that you can manage without me... precisely this..this is the reason I can't just sees you as just my son..if only...you weren't such..a genius..if your weren't the one who protects me..but instead...I was the one who shelter and protect you like a proper mother...I wouldn't have these forbidden feelings... feeling of loves for a man" she sobs in sadness..

"mom..I didn't.. know you felt that way" I feel terrible.. knowing that mother feeling that yet I didn't notice a thing , maybe I was focused on training too much for me to notice...

mom smiles and shakes her head "no..you didn't..and I'm thankful that you didn't.. because..if you did you would feel guilty for something that's it's not your fault..and will start to lower yourself and maybe doing mistakes intentionally ,just to try to cheer me up.."she gives me knowing smile.. damn she hit the bulleye , that's exactly the things I would do in that situation..she knows me too well...

"see.. I can read you like an open book.. hehe " she giggles and looks at Bonney and continue "and when we decide to adopt you Bonney, I thought that...I can at raise you like a normal child..you were smart.. and mature for your age but you had you own share of mistake..." she smile while running her pink hair..

"m-mom.." Bonney stutter while sniffing and tearing up and eating the monster meat..

"but then , we found your aging power, and since then you staying as a teenager most the time.. unless when you riding Taiger hehe" she laughs a bit and continue "part of me become happy that I gained a friend close to my age , but another part

we're sad to lose the chance seeing you grow up normally,and since you matured mentally with you growing in age , I couldn't teaching you like a normal mother , now can I?" she smiles while caressing Bonney cheeks

"mom.." both of us not knowing what say...the situation is complicated..mom feeling like is not surprising...yet shocking..

"that why...I decided.." mother spoke suddenly...I feel anxious for some reason, did this whole ordeal made her have suicidal thoughts?!

" I decided to make yo-" "mother! no! I love you ..you shouldn't think like that!" "make you train me~~~ to become super strong mommy~~" she spoke cheerfully

"huh?"

"hmm?"

both of us tilts our heads confusingly..