CHAPTER 25 (2)

Revealing his real identity. - 2.

“I had no bad intentions, that’s a fact. I just want you to know that I have no intentions of two-timing you with Margaux. She’s just someone who was picked by my dad because of the business. And when I told you that I wanted to marry you, that’s the truth.” I told her.

It’s been wondering me for a while...

Did I just want her to go back to work or am I seeing Satsuki as my woman now? I hate her before. She’s a weird girl. A weird girl who only fantasizes about men who like other men. That’s why I never thought that I would fall in love with her like this.But I was wrong. Who knows that I would fall in love with her like this. It’s because it was her, she’s my first love that’s why I couldn’t help but fall in love with her.

I couldn’t look at her at all. I feel so ashamed of myself. I held on to my pants and I couldn’t help myself but feel so shy around her. When did I even start to feel this way to her? I never felt this before. It’s so hard to admit your feelings especially when she’s the girl that you’ll be talking with. Because she can just easily reject you. But I won’t stop until she answers me. I just want to tell the truth to her. I messed up with my hair and I sighed, “With this whole week….honestly I felt so helpless. I know that you were the only girl who can keep up with me. You’re the only girl who can never get tired of me. So please listen to me. I’m not here to take you back as a personal assistant who works for my dad. I’ve been thinking whether I will say this to you or not but Satsuki please believe me that you’re the only girl that I wanted to marry.”

She held onto her chest and she looked so surprised at what I said.

“I am unsure of what I feel about you..”She said and she cried, “I’ve been so confused…on what I should feel about you…or to my first love…I just don’t know what I should do anymore. Ever since Cheng Yaozu visited me, I know that he might be telling the truth. So you tell me the truth then. Is it true? Are you the kid that I met back then? It’s been 10 years, why didn’t you introduce yourself to me sooner?”

This isn’t getting good. What does this mean then? Could it be possible that she might have remembered everything? Should I tell her then? But I’m scared of what will happen. I just found her, should I just endure the pain that she might go away if she knew the truth? Maybe the way I protected her was making her too painful but I don’t have any choice. I don’t know how I should tell her. I got closer to her and looked at her seriously, “Then, are you saying that you already remember what happened 10 years ago?”

She was unsure of what she should say to me and she just gripped on her clothes, “No…I still don’t remember. But if I could just see that black cat once again then I might start to remember then. I feel that I was the only one who didn't know about what happened to me back then. My family knew about what happened to me but why isn’t I don’t even know what happened to me? If you’re the person that I can trust then please tell me the truth.”

I don’t want to see her like this. I don’t want her to be hurt like this. I thought that I was protecting her but in the end, I was just the one who was hurting her so badly. I never wanted to hurt her. That’s why even if it’s hard to say it to her I guess I have no choice but to admit it to her. I will tell her. And I will show my brother that I’m not a coward. Whatever happens, I will surely tell her the truth.

“Yes…I was that kid.”I admitted.

I grabbed the red bracelet in my pocket and showed it to her. She was so surprised when she saw it and at the same time, she was so happy. Her tears were falling on her cheeks and she looked so happy. I expected to be hated by her and I am already aware of what will happen to me but that didn’t happen. It took me too long to say the truth to her. I gripped my hair and I couldn’t help but feel guilty, “I just recently found that when I bought you in my place before…” I told her.

I slapped my face and I couldn’t stop myself from blushing here. It’s hard. To say your real feelings…I never have done this stuff before. I even looked so stupid in here but it doesn’t even matter anymore. I don’t mind saying these things to her. I’ve been nothing but air to her and I waited for her for too long but when I finally met her, we still had the wrong timing. But I’m not giving up now. Now that she’s here I am going to confess to her even if I am not used to these things. I will clear things out and tell her that I like her.

“I just wanted to protect you. So please let me trouble you when it comes to those things. Don’t pressure yourself to knew everything because it will just be hard for you. I don’t want you to be reminded by the past that gave you trauma.” I told her and then I got closer to her and I ruffled her hair and stared at her, “I made a lot of mistakes to you and for that I’m sorry.”

She still looked so confused by now. But it’s better off this way. That she wouldn’t have to know about the tragedy that happened before. She was just a victim like me. The one who is at fault here was dad. It’s because they were doing illegal things that’s why it lead to this. I wanted to have her but I won’t force her because of the situation right now it will be just hard. I guess I’m already content that I already told her who I was. I got closer to her and held her hand, “I won’t pressure you. You don’t have to answer me right away and please let me see you from now on. Is that okay?”I asked.

She become so serious out of a sudden and she nodded, “Yeah, of course, you can.”

“Please don’t be too formal to me! Just call me like what you used to call me!” I said irritatedly and she bowed at me so many times and she has gotten so shy out of a sudden, “Y—You mean to call you by your first name? I just can’t do that!”

She moved her head from the side and I crossed my arms, “You’re not even in my company, and didn’t you decide to go without saying? So what’s the point of being formal? Well, it’s not like I am forcing you to go back right away. If it’s rest that you need, I—'ll let you go for awhile Satchan. I can tell dad to give you a break.” I told her and she was surprised when she heard me calling her nickname. I could never forget that. She wanted me to call her like that when we’re still kids.

“O—Okay, Chang.” She said and she covered her face and she was blushing deeply. She didn’t change. I guess this is the one thing I fell for her? She’s not looking at anyone’s appearance or judging them. She’s pure and honest and that’s what I like about her.

She got closer to me and she pulled my shirt, “Just to let you know, I’m not resigning. What will you do without me? I bet there’s no one that you can tease without me.” She teased me and I just glared at her. She’s something else. I just can’t stop her being so cheeky all the time. She can never fail to impress me. Fine, since I did something bad to her I’ll let her slip this once. But once I started courting her, I’ll make sure that she would have eyes on me only and she’ll fall harder for me.

“Then good. I don’t want any girl then you Satsuki. This time, let’s get serious.” I pulled her close to me and I kissed her forehead. I saw her face getting flushed for a moment and I couldn’t help but smirk. She’s really cute when she’s not being honest, but it’s fine. I know that she likes me. So I’ll gonna show her how serious I am when courting her.