Greek mythology

Now I'm not going into a rant about how x religion is stupid or bad...

Because all relgions are very stupid. Including my very own greek mythology. Now I may not believe in any religion, but good fucking lord greek mythos is the weirdest shit, it rivals japanese Kami sometimes.

So as you all know there are major gods in Greek mythology, but what came before the people like Zues, Hera, and Poseidon? It was 2 gods.

Gaia and Uronos were the 2 celestial gods that made heaven and earth. After that they had children, who were called the Titan's. And one of the Titans was Cronus the god of harvest, agriculture, fertitlity, and the age and destruction of time. He was also The king of Titans.

After he was warned he would be overthrown by his children, he ate Hestia, Demeter, Hera, Hades, and Poseiden, and also the Cyclopses and Hekatonkereys. But his wife Rhea hid Zeus in a bush and replaced him with a rock, telling him to grow up and kill his tyranic father.

After he grew up he cut open his fathers stomach and released all of them, then with the Cyclopses masterpiece, the thunder bolt, he waged war against the titans, with only 1 surviving.

That being Atlas, the Titan who holds Earth on his shoulders as punishment.

Thats the basis of Greek mythology, not that weird yet. But you havent seen my 2 favorites.

One day Zeus was having a very, very, very bad headache while he was visiting Earth. So in a fit of desperation, he asked a local Lumberjack to split his head open with his axe. After he split open the head of Zeus, a FULLY GROWN woman came out of his head.

Naming her Athena, she became "The Wisest of the gods" It's suprising because I thought Zeus didnt have a brain, probably because Athen stole it.

And next the utmost rediculous mythos ever. The story of Asterion the Minotaur.

So it is sometime between the 1700BCE - 1400BCE range when the King of Crete, Minos was contacted by Poseiden. Poseiden summoned down the most beautiful, majestic bull Gaia had ever laid eyes on, asking Minos to sacrifice the bull to Poseiden, as he couldn't himself.

Strucken by the bulls beauty, Minos schemed and tried to trick the sea god into thinking he sacrificed the right Bull, but actually keeping it to himself. Poseiden enraged that a mere mortal dare defy and try to trick him, made his wife fall in love with the Bull.

The passion of Pasiphae and the Bull made the amalgamation called the Minotaur. After years of hiding Minos found out about Asterious, enraged he called for Daedalus, a mortal who made works of technology comparable to gods.

Daedalus created a labyrinth, a maze underground that would trap the Minotaur untill his untimely death by the hands of Theseus, along with Asterious' half sister Ariadne.

Damn those gods be fucking wack.