38. Sex Friends

"How long has he been having nightmares dad? ...And how comes none of you has ever told me about it?"

"He didn't want to worry you. He said we shouldn't tell anyone about it...even Elric had to find out when he was here. Besides, you hardly visit and when you do, you don't spend the night...or come by when he's already awake." Dad Joss patted Stan's back gently to reassure him and whispered on, "He sleeps with his door open mostly, or with the lights on. Your father and I take shifts every night to watch over him. Elric helps out too but you being here is a relief. It is your responsibility now so I'll go ahead and sleep..."

"Dad wait!" Stan grabbed onto his father's hand. "What I'm I supposed to do? If he wakes up and finds me in his room, he might become even more scared."

"We normally bring some of your clothes over to his room, a shirt or a vest. Your scent does the trick most of the time but takes much longer since it's often faint. There are medicines we've recommended but he doesn't want to take them and become dependent. He is a biochemist after all and understands the need to let the body become self reliant. Your fated is quite sturbbon and I agree with him on that one, but now you are here, do what fated mates do...At least for tonight, I'll spend time with my beloved..." Dad Joss gently pulled his hand away from Stan, leaving him confused.

"This is so hard...why would you hide this from me...Elric too..."

Stan quietly entered Yeon's room, tormented to see him fidgeting on the bed, sweating, tossing and turning as if he was fighting off someone or something. His eyes were tightly shut, still illuminating through the lids and he appeared to be trying to speak up but only whimpered.

He seemed to be in a lot of pain.

"Yeon...Yeon wake up..." Stan called out softly while tapping his shoulder, releasing bis and bits of his scent and after a few minutes, he calmed down.

Sitting on the carpet beside the bed, Stan felt sorry for him. This was not the right way to live life. During the day, Yeon acted strong, confident and courageous. He was often calm apart from his usual grumpiness. Admittedly, Yeon handled himself much better than anyone had expected and to think he neither took antidepressants or inhibitors just proved how much strength he had in himself.

He seemed confident to recover on his own without depending on anyone yet at night, when his subconscious took over, he'd show his vulnerability, his fears chasing him frequently as they did now.

"Stan...what are you doing here?"

Startled, Stan hadn't noticed Yeon wake up. Yeon's soft voice in the quiet night made his body grow cold, unable to speak up.

"Did I have another nightmare?"

Clearing his throat to hide his nervousness, Stan replied, "Yes...I just came in to calm you down..."

"Thank you." Yeon replied, closing his eyes again as if he was going back to sleep.

"Yeon...you know, it's okay to not be okay. You don't have to be strong after what you have gone through...if you want to cry or talk about anything, I'm here to listen."

"Don't pity me. " Yeon replied, keeping his eyes closed. "Don't close the door either on your way out."

"There you go again, pushing me away...."

"I have no intention of accepting your feelings Stan. I don't hate you anymore so stop trying to get close to me. Don't kiss me again either. It makes me uncomfortable."

"Why did you hate me before. I'd really like to know."

"You are rude and obnoxious. Domineering and possessive. You talked down on me, as if what I'd gone through was my own doing. You are what I'm not, fated to me to mark me when I'd hoped to mark the person I'd be paired to." Opening his eyes, Yeon locked eyes with Stan and added, "You've seen me at my most vulnerable states, my heat, my nakedness...you can control how I feel with your scent. Because of you I've lost power over myself and will never reclaim it. All these reasons do not compare to the feeling of disgust on your face when I was in the bathtub at your place and you continuously poured freezing cold water on me. It's as if you blamed me for being taken advantage of. I felt like trash...I didn't know what was happening to me yet somehow, you managed to make me feel like some open public toilet at the center of a big city for everyone to use. The words you hurled at me so harshly...'You were throwing yourself at me just like your dear sister has thrown herself to every other guy on this campus,' 'are you happy with just anyone,' 'How dirty you are to yearn and pant for Niel at such a time knowing he is probably sleeping with your sister right now,' 'how pathetic,' Those were your very words Stan and many more have you said after. Yet, here you are claiming to like me. Aren't you just confused since we are fated?"

"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry." Stan apologized, covering his face with both hands. He'd been confused then, however, he'd acted out of line and was ashamed to have selfishly thought he was suffering more when the one who was in pain the entire time had been Yeon.

"I still want to date you regardless and it has nothing to do with us being fated. I'm aware in the long run our scents will pull us together since our spiritual essence are in synch, but I still want to have a connection with you besides all that because I actually like you. I have no intention of giving up on pursuing you Yeon."

"All those cheesy words you said before...too much literature for my ears." Sitting up, Yeon added, "Are you even aware how good looking you are? Next to you, I look like your baby brother yet we are probably age mates...I hate it."

Stan laughed and Yeon remembered his contagious laugh when they had both shared a brief light moment after his first heat with Stan. He laughed too, unable to hold it in.

"You know you have a funny laugh. That would explain why you have a lot of friends aside from people wanting to hang around you because of your looks."

"I won't bother you with much literature and praise you too but thanks for noticing me. I'd be disappointed if you hadn't."

"So arrogant from a little complement," Yeon mocked, raising his legs to rest his head on his knees, his eyes still at Stan. "but looks tend to fade.."

"Have you seen my dads?"

"You just had to show off some more didn't you?" Yeon laughed. "They say one can't have everything in life but everyone in your family did, my family as well. Somehow, all the good stuff went to Mijin, leaving me with leftovers."

They stared at each other for a while before Stan broke the silence. "You've tortured me many times Yeon. Do you know how many times I had to jerk myself off just from thinking about you?"

"What a way to ruin the mood Stan! Why would you bring that up?" Yeon felt embarrassed and tried to cover his face but Stan grabbed both his hands and sat on the bed in front of Yeon.

"You said no more literature so I'm choosing to be courageous. Every time you went into heat, I did it not once or twice but multiple times..."

"I don't have to know!" Yeon tried to pull his hands free but Stan only tightened his grip.

"I've dreamt of you times without number... I couldn't get you out of my mind. That day during the inning, when I spotted you among the spectators, I couldn't concentrate on the game and almost failed my team. Coach kept yelling at me but all I could think of was the dream of making love to you I'd had that morning..."

"Fine! You've proved your point!"

"Then date me Yeon. Give a chance to prove my feelings for you. I don't want the first time we make love to be because of completing the mark. I want to have something real with you."

"You mean sex...we can do that if that's what you want so let go! I already told you I have no intention of accepting your feelings just so we can break up when we both get tired of each other..."

"Fine then." Stan replied calmly, loosening his grip on Yeon's wrists, who immediately pulled himself free to inspect any marks on them.

"So strong, have pity on...wait...you agree?"

"Why not? I get to finally have sex with you and you don't get to be tied up to someone since you despise it so much. You're afraid of being in a relationship but that doesn't mean you're afraid of us sleeping together."

"What?" Yeon felt confused. Wasn't this Stan the romantic as Elric often called him? What was he up to now?

"Seems you want us to go casual, though I'll admit I'll feel jealous if I saw you blushing at someone else like Niel but I can't force you to date me so this way, we both get what we want. After your making is complete, I'll let you go though it will be hard for me."

"I thought you cared about stuff like love and courtship...and the rest of that mushy bullshit! Why change your mind just because I agreed to have sex with you? What weak conviction you have Stan..."

"I'm not saying I will stop hoping. I'll do my best to convince you to change your mind and in the end if you wish to go, I'll let you go Yeon."

"This is trickery!"

"Yeon..." Stan called his name softly, moving closer to him and Yeon stopped him by placing his palms firmly on his chest.

"Stan, calm down...you have that 'I want to kiss you' look on your face..."

"Then why are you trying to stopping me? Shouldn't we at least sign our verbal contract with a kiss? If my memory serves me right, you kissed me back last time. Therefore instead of stopping me, you should be more honest and admit you like kissing me too."

"I'll never admit that!"

"Then I'll take advantage of your pride and remind you..."

Stan ignored Yeon's pleas to wait and began planting kisses on Yeons's neck, ear and then covered his lips with his. He was tempted to make a mess out of him but controlled himself to do it later, when he'd become more willing.

Stan had been dreaming of this moment for weeks, only getting release from jerking off from Yeon's residual scent yet here he was, in this room, fitting perfectly in his arms and responding to his kiss, slowly surrendering, tempting him to take him right here, right now. He could feel Yeon tremble from the pleasure they both were sharing for Yeon had slowly began releasing his new scent which was much sweater than the previous one. Soon enough, he had wrapped his hands around Stan's shoulder and was pulling himself towards Stan, who'd pulled away and began to kiss his neck again. Yeon let out an erotic moan and Stan thought to himself how hearing his turned on voice made kissing him feel good every time.

"If you keep giving in like this... I won't be able to stop myself...and become desperate for your warmth..."

Yeon abruptly pushed him away, unable to look at his face and Stan smiled at Yeon's flustered face.

"You're getting greedy...you should go to your room." Yeon said, his eyes still facing the wall. He was relieved when Stan stood up and walked to the door but then stopped midway and asked, "Should I close it?"

"No...open...keep it open." Yeon felt ashamed of his stuttering and hoped it wasn't as obvious as his excited erection. He was convinced Stan was up too.

"You're driving me crazy Yeon...I hope you know that." Stan said and left for his room.

Covering his face, Yeon swore multiple times, throwing punches at his pillow several times. Stan had managed to lure him for the second time, and he had enjoyed it! There was no denying that he was a good kisser...then it hit him.

What had he just agreed to?