Chapter 626

  I watch her for a long moment, the weight of my burden bearing down heavily, and I can’t do it with her. She has been so much to me, so crucial to my life in so many ways and I don’t want to keep hiding about any of this. He is her son; he wouldn’t want me to lie to her.

  “I lost our baby.” It comes out softly, heartfelt yet calm and even though the words are painful. I don’t fall apart or cry. I accept that it is what it is and it’s okay to not be okay. My body pulses with the effort to remain so but it feels better to tell someone properly. She sits in stunned silence and stares at me for a moment. Saying nothing, doing nothing as I turn to her and cover our connected fingers with my other hand.

  “Arrick is broken hearted, and I stupidly pushed him away when he needed me the most. He’s not here because I asked him for space.” I say it as though it’s so very clear for the first time and feel like an absolute failure in every way.