Chapter 182: Self-Reflection

Early Afternoon - Late Summer : Valtivar, Siratha (The Capital)

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- Liv Sigmond ~

"What.. are those scales?"

My stomach immediately turned into a knot when I heard her worried voice. "I'm.. not sure either..." I hung my head as I spoke. "It all happened when I took an elixir and passed out on the floor... By the time I woke up, I was just.. like this.." I looked at the porcelain-like skin on my hands as if it was foreign. -I still haven't gotten used to it...-

Grandmother's eyes widened. "Could it have been an elixir from.. an Evolutionary Beast?"

I immediately turned to her with my eyebrows raised. "Evolutionary Beast?"

Her surprised look turned calm as I asked. "It's an exceedingly rare type of Mystic Beast that only appears once every several hundred years." Her voice had a calming tone. "Although it may simply be a myth, when I was young, I was told that drinking the elixir from one could evolve regular elves to high-elves."

"But even then..." Thinking back to the image of myself in the mirror, I couldn't get over the scales. "I clearly evolved to something other than a high-elf..."

Seemingly ignoring my gloomy mood, her smile grew wider. "But what's wrong with that?"

Her words immediately cleared the conflicting thoughts in my mind. -Wait... What is wrong with that?- Looking back down at my hands, I clenched them a couple times and felt the incredible strength that surged within my body. -Why did I reject it so much?- Looking back at Grandmother, I saw her familiar proud look from my childhood.

"Are you feeling better now, sweetie?" She reached out and gently rubbed my head, quickly pulling me out of my thoughts.

"Y..yeah... Thank you, Grandmother..." I couldn't help but feel embarrassed as she treated me like she did when I was a kid, but that childish embarrassment didn't last for long. "But, if I didn't evolve into a high-elf, what am I?"

"Well, that's for you to figure out as time passes, isn't it?"

"Y..yeah..." Turning towards the end of the bed, I finally looked into the mirror and took a close look at myself. -Why.. did I reject myself so much...- As I thought to myself, tears had unknowingly come to my eyes.

*pat-rub* Feeling Grandmother's hand gently rubbing my back, the tears started to rush forward.

Scooching up next to me, she spoke in a gentle and soothing voice. "If you need to cry, I can lend you my breast."

Without even thinking, I turned and dropped my head onto her chest.

Feeling her arms wrap around me, I felt an unusually deep warmth in my chest, causing the pent-up fear, anxiety, and self-hate that had built up over the past month to flow like a waterfall.

The next thing I remember, I was looking up at the ceiling while laying down in bed. -Huh? What happened?- Sitting up in bed with my hand on my forehead, I could hear the chatter of various folk from the front of the tavern. -Did I fall asleep?-

Swinging my legs off the bed, I glanced in the mirror and noticed just how disheveled I looked. -Ah.. right... I probably fell asleep after crying...-

Finally standing up, I fixed my silk-like hair into a ponytail and straightened up my clothes. "Hooh..." With a deep breath to try and calm my unsettled nerves, I reached for the doorknob. -Let's see how I can help Grandmother today...- *Click*

As the door swung open, my ears were immediately met with loud chatter, and my mind was washed in nostalgia.

*Sniff* The air was filled with the aroma of delicious food I remembered from my childhood that made my mouth water instinctively. -To think I was nervous that this place would change...-

Walking down the hall with a refreshed smile, I turned into the kitchen and saw Grandmother flipping a large cut of meat. *sizzle*

She was quick to notice my presence. "Good morning, sweetie. How did you sleep?"

My smile immediately turned warm. "Quite well. I think finally letting out all the feelings that had accumulated made it for an extra good nap." 

"Haha, I'm glad to hear you slept hard enough to lose track of time. So what would you like for breakfast, sweetie?" Her smile contained pure joy.

-It's morning?!- Almost immediately, a deep craving for a few dishes came to mind, but I immediately tried to shake them off. -I can go without it, I'm sure she could use my help...- "I'm alright for now, so how can I help?"

But she didn't seem to want it. "I'm sure you're hungry, so go find a seat, and I'll bring you something special."

"No, no, no, I'm not too hungr-" *growl* My voice was cut off by my stomach rumbling.

"Haha!" Her laugh was deep and youthful. "You can help me after you have a bite to eat, how about that?"

Embarrassed by the absolutely terrible timing, I simply nodded with a red face and made my way into the front of the tavern. -What are the chances...-

Walking out of the kitchen, I came into the dining area and noticed only one table was empty before making my way over and sitting down.

"Hey, pretty lady. Do you mind if I sit here?" A muscular demihuman man set his hand on the chair at the other side of the table I chose to sit at.

"I'd like to sit alone, sorry." Although he was fairly good-looking and could even pass for some kind of noble, my gut told me something was off about him.

"Awe that's a shame, I thought I'd get to sit with a beauty." His smile was cocky, and his voice was arrogant, quickly grabbing the attention of everyone around.

"She really is quite stunning..."

"Right?"

"Where did she come from?"

"I'm not sure. Someone of her stature should be well known around these parts..." The entire tavern started chatting up a storm, with me as the topic, but oddly enough, it didn't bother me.

As a newly appointed Commander who practically skipped an entire rank after the 'untimely deaths' of both my superiors, everyone in the City of Spiall gave me suspicious gazes. -But it's not like I can blame them...-

As I dwelled on the issues that those suspicions would cause once classes resumed in a few years, I suddenly felt a knot of anxiety in my stomach.

But thankfully, that knot was immediately untied by the therapeutic smell of freshly toasted white bread, meat, and soup.

Immediately looking up, I saw Grandmother personally bring out several dishes and set them in front of me. "Here you go, sweetie."

It was quite a lot of food, but somehow I felt like I could eat all of it.

"You can go ahead and dig in. Once you finish, you can come to help me in the back, alright?" She patted my head a bit before walking back into the kitchen without saying a word to anyone else.

Everyone else in the room stared at me with curious gazes, but I didn't care in the slightest.

-She remembered my favorites!- 

Not dallying any further, I picked up the beautifully fluffy toast and dug in.

The taste of the food caused a wave of nostalgia to wash through my body that completely blotted out my surroundings.

Once I eventually finished everything in front of me, I neatly stacked up all the dishes with a look of pure satisfaction and brought them back into the kitchen. 

"I'm happy to see you enjoyed your meal. I have more if you would like." Grandmother wore a proud smile, but I couldn't tell why.

"Hehe, I'm alright, Grandmother. Now it's my turn to help."

As I made my way over to the small closet in the kitchen, I pulled out a small and dusty half apron I had long since outgrown, but with a casual motion, the rest of it unfolded. [1] -To think I can fit into a full size now.-

Casually tying it around my waist, I turned back to Grandmother and got to work.

As I carried several plates out from the kitchen for the first time in nearly 15 years, I felt a deep and pure joy fill my body. -It feels good to be home...-

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[1] - It was a hemmed half apron for her when she was a kid. She just undid the hem for it to fit.