Chapter Four

Marsha was looking at me from her locker. Out of all the times i've been in school her lockers always been right next to mine don't call it a coincidence. Because it wasn't one. I had walked in on her last year asking if she could switch lockers. I didn't mind though I didn't care. If quinn knew someone was going to switch lockers with him he would of jumped up for joy up down up down. Once I saw him. There was this girl named Claire that all the guys were interested in. a short busty girl with blonde hair and when quinn figured out there lockers were right next to each other he went crazy ballistic. Maybe I should of done that before I saw a curly head of pink hair bellow me. he was muttering something. I don't know how I didn't notice him right below me. I never really used my locker but i'm sure I would have noticed something like this. He tapped on my leg.

"Hey Niko, have you seen my pin?"

"your what?" I wasn't sur ei wanted to talk to him I for sure thought he wouldn't want to talk to me because of what I said or what I did I walked out on him I left him. There. I wonder if mom my mom told him what happened. If she did I hoped she also told him to go away. I couldn't face him I couldn't even be near him. More importantly I didn't want to be by his side.

"my pin". Why would I have seen hs pi it wasn't like I tool it from him and went rummaging around for it. Even if I did where would I of even put it. He stuck his hands into his locker again pulling out note book after notebook after notebook. He was certainly not like other writers. Maybe I should get him I support journals like Sami.

"What does it look like?"

"it's a pride pin". He didn't look up when he said this as if he was embarrassed witch maybe he was nobody in our school would where a pride pin. But someone like him I wasn't surprised. His pink hair had parts of brown now that I was closer and his eyes looked tired.

"you where a pride pin?" he nodded then said quickly in distress. "my dads gave it to me". I knelt down onto the floor rummaging looking into his locker door. Unlike some of us he had a huge locker that was jam-packed with notebooks and pens. There weren't school books anywhere. My mom had told me on countless occasions that I had to put my books in my locker. I ont want to have you in a wheelchair. Of course she was kidding.

"where did you last see it? ''. He just shrugged going through the locker. It was pretty messy. I didn't even keep my room that messy despite what my mom would say. Gutter threw one last notebook onto the floor with a sigh sitting down his knees tucked under him. He looked so sad but so did I.

"I don't know at the coffee shop maybe.." His voice drifted off when he looked at a spot behind me. It was Quinn and Marsha. I should have expected they would be here. I had been avoiding him after all. My father would have laughed at me

"oh you found Gutter". Marsha grinned

"yeah?" she nodded her head at what she did when she was planning something or she knew something I didn't.

"he Marsha''. Normally boys would blush heavily at marsha quinn always did he always looked at her transfixed but not Gutter he barely looked up from his locker. Marsha didin see, to care at all though.

"meet the newest member of the pen pals". Is that what they decided to name us when I was gone. It was stupid I should have been there to keep them from saying anything chaotic.

"Are you part of the writing group?"

" the pen place yeah '' .he swept his hair along his forehead conveniently forgetting about the pride pin.

"I wanted to join you see i'm a writer".

"and we need another member since well". Marsha and quinn glanced at each other they were keeping something from me people always had this look that when they were keeping a secret it was easy to tell.

"Sami quit".

"why". Marsha shrugged like she could care less which maybe she could care less but believe it or not sami was the calmest I glanced over at Gutte who shrugged. He didn't seem upset anymore about the pride pin.

"you".

"why me". I couldn't imagine why she would leave because of me. I didn't really do anything. I was gone for a week yeah but did she know why I was gone did she really think that I would never come back. Maybe I wouldn't come back. I didn't want to. I would have stayed in my room under my cover alone in the dark.

"you know what doesn't answer that ''. I wrung my hands in front of my face. There was still a scratch on my arm that lifted from my jacket The scare from the knife. I stood up glancing towards my locker one more time before walking down the hallway Gutter in toe. His swagger I noticed was limping and short his jeans were ripped with a red rose on his back pocket. If you look at the football team you would see that they never wore pink, only their team colors which was the most interesting of everything.

"So did you write today". Who was he ,my mom?

"no I told you I can't write". He sighed like he was expecting this answer. I truth I had tried to write today but my hands were shaking my words were strangled write your feelings write your feelings. I read I online that when you feel like you can't write you lose your purpose. What was my purpose other than writing. I was nothing nothing.

"and I told you". He pressed a finger to my shoulder as if we've been friends for years. He didn't know anything about me. he shouldn't pretend he knows me. that's what gets me about people.

"anyone can write ''. He opened his notebook to a dog eared page. That was written with pink letters. I was starting to figure out that pink was his color. Everyone had a color.

"no they can't can you like go away?"

"nope your mom". I knew it my mom put him up to this. I didnint even want him to be here and knew he was looking at me confused. Did my mom not tell him at all? My dad was right, she was a very tricky trickster. He pointed to the page that I had written his name in. I'm not sure what he was getting at all. I ws sure that I didn't want to know at all.