Chapter 5 - travel days

Dreams come unbidden to my sleeping mind, perhaps prompted by the conversations of the previous day. I lunge at my sister, grasping for a beautiful turquoise colored ribbon.

"I hate you!" I cry in righteous indignation. "You always steal my things." Her nose points in the air and she tucks it behind her back.

"I'm the crown princess." She tells me "I can take whatever I want." A maid pats me on the head as if she is placating a dog.

"I'll get the little miss another one." She says, unwilling to meet my eyes.

"I don't want another one... that one was a gift!" I say, begging with big blue eyes that have slowly filled with tears. The image of the boy was still alive in my mind. The way he had smiled at me as I gazed up into bright green eyes. He had drawn the ribbon out from nowhere as if by magic and fastened it into my hair with dexterous fingers.

Natalia laughs as she holds it just out of my grasp, mocking me until her tutor calls her for the evening lesson. I'm not old enough for lessons on wifely duties and managing households, so instead I tuck myself under a mound of pillows at the end of my bed. Listening to the chatter of my sisters lesson coming through the bid double-doors that connect our room.

I awaken hours later to the sounds of metal on stone, The sound is odd and I peek out from my hiding place in curiosity. The room is dark, only a few stray rays of moonlight filtering in from a gap in the curtains. There is a shrill scream from outside the hallway door, the sound cut off by a sort gurgling. I squiggle closer to the headboard, my heart pounding in my chest. My door creeps open, the voices of men speaking in low tones.

"Where's the girl?" One asks, that bed hasn't even been slept on!

"She's probably with her parents or older sister." The other voice says. There's the sound of a latch, two double doors swinging open. I can hear the shaking in my sisters voice as she asks what they are doing in her quarters. Then there is the musical sound of a blade being drawn.

"Maybe I should take a bite out the little lass, never had myself a princess before." Says a voice that seem to drip with want of pleasure. There is a loud thump and a shriek as Natalia begins to fight, screaming for help at the top of her lungs. Her shrill voice becomes muffled, as if someone has covered her mouth with their hand; Then all at once the sounds cuts off entirely.

"What in the fuck man, I wanted to have a little fun first!" Growls the man with the slippery wanting voice.

"She was just a child you disgusting little maggot, she deserved a quick death." The other argues, his voice cold and indifferent, even as the other man pours out a litany of profanity.

I shake in my hiding spot beneath the pillows, trying to stay perfectly still. When I'm sure they're gone I slip out of bed and run into Natalia's room. The stone beneath my bare feet as cold as ice, my feet aching with the chill.

I slip as my feet meet something sticky, skidding across the floor in a tumble and ripping my nightdress as it catches something sharp. I get to my feet, a sob catching in my throat as I freeze at the sight before me. A face right in front of me, Natalia face. She is strewn across the bed, her head fallen back and over the side of the bed and her hair trailing down to the floor. Her face is just inches from mine and as I reach out to touch it, I am awed at the strangeness. She seems so still, I think to myself and how odd that she is sleeping with her eyes open.

The door swings open and I jump turning in horror before I properly realize who it is. My knight stands there, bleeding from the shoulder with a torch in hand. He steps into the room shutting the door behind him before freezing in shock.

I turn to look at Natalia in the light and notice the wide gash in her neck. Here eyes look back at me like empty pits and I take a step back. There is a turquoise ribbon tied decoratively around one of her thin wrists. For a fraction of a second I think about reaching out and untying it, but It doesn't seem that important anymore. When I look down, I notice that my hands and feet are red, my dress spattered in her blood.

I fix my eyes on my knight and open my mouth, but the words don't come. He crosses the room in a burr and scoops me off the ground. ,

"Oh god, Oh dear God." He repeats again and again. Nearly stumbling as he runs from the room without looking back, his arms grasping me so tightly that I can scarcely breath. I don't complain, for my attention is drawn elsewhere. It is drawn to a maid that lays slumped in a corner, Colin one of my guards lays in a pool of his own blood in the hall. Everywhere I look there is death. But I do not close my eyes, I take all of it in, watching open eyed as the companions that had colored my childhood lay scattered throughout our castle.

We slip out a side gate that only the servants use, riding out to the main road at the speed of a gallop. He tries to shield my eyes as we pass the main gate, but I have already seen it. My fathers head skewered on a pike and set atop the balustrades as if in warning.

I am up the moment Devar touches me, rolling to my knees and reaching for my sword. A snarl already building in my throat.

"Hush! It's okay Rowan. Shit! It's okay." He insists at a whisper. both hands raised in an attempt to placate me. It takes me a moment for the red to dissipate from my vision. Devar tenderly removing the blade from my grasp; sheathing the weapon and tucking it back under my covers.

He meets my gaze and slowly my heartbeat returns to its tell tale thrum.

"Rowen..." He calls to me tenderly. "Look up." He moves from where he'd been crouching and sits next to me on my bedroll, looking at me expectantly. As soon as I oblige him, a little gasp escapes my lips. Stars streak across the sky in bright flares of blue flame. I fall back onto the moss, breathing in the cool forest air and watching the sky through the break in the canopy. It is lit periodically with streaks of light, that fizzle out in a hail of sparks; skipping across the star spattered sky like stones across a lake.

"Isn't it beautiful?" He asks, laying down next to me. I nod my head in agreement, my words stuck in my throat. I can feel Devars warmth through the thin material of my tunic, his gaze on me when it should be on the sky.

"It reminds me of you." He says, his voice barely audible over the rustling of leaves. "Stunning.... and impossibly out of reach." I shift around, finding his hand in the dark and weaving my fingers through his.

"I'm right here silly." I tell him. His lips pull into a tight smile and he shakes his head.

"Tell me what I am to you Rowan." I squeeze his fingers thinking for a moment before I answer.

"You are my partner in crime, my comrade, my brother and my friend." He smiles at that, although it doesn't reach his eyes.

"I know." He says, his voice a steady exhale.

"You are hope." I add in a quiet breath, so silently that only I can hear it.

A week passes rhythmically, the patterns of a caravan on the move filling the waking hours. In the morning we make breakfast and pack our things, scarfing down our food, before once more plodding along. Today we are back in another forest, one that cloaks a winding river valley. The road curves through the trees and every once and a while we hear the sound of rushing water.

Thick clouds settle over the forest path. Mist hanging in the air, a blanket of white obscuring our vision. We follow the curve of the road just like every other day. There is a tension here that prickles at the back of my neck like a warning.

At first I ignore it, sure that it's just paranoia. Sure until I hear a rustle in the trees, I swing off the back of my wagon and walk up next to Regan and Devin.

"Someone's in trees and they're watching us." I tell them under my breath. They nod to me and I continue down the line of men. Dropping hints until I get the front of the caravan. Devar and Sven sit in front of the first wagon, Sven holding the reins in both hands and the horses plodding along like nothing at all is wrong.