Alicetroemeria

There was a sense of dread among our core group as we anticipated what came next: Tartarus. There were only three left to explore. We had a pretty good idea what one of them would be: the world where monsters had won the Great Monster Wars. The world of that horrifyingly cruel version of Tamamo. Despite all I'd heard about my second wife's past, I had never seen evil like that before, just emanating from someone I loved. And I'd encountered a bad Tamamo once before, on Ariana's world. But even that Tamamo had been pretty far along in her personal growth, needing only an opportunity to change. The Tamamo I had encountered in Grangold Palace reveled in her evil. Was it really possible that my Tamamo had that kind of darkness inside of her?

Saja had talked a good game about personal freedom, but I myself had grown over the centuries. No matter how dense you are, if you live eight hundred years, you're going to learn some things. And one thing I had learned was that there's a fine line between liberty and license, between a world of freedom and a world where the strong dominated the weak.

Other issues still hung over our party. Alice's mother probably had a death wish, and she was willing to start a war to provoke that death, because she and her Monster World allies saw it as necessary to keep this world following the correct history as closely as possible. But Alice and I were also aware that we didn't have sufficient information to be sure of that yet. The evidence was compelling, but there were still things that didn't make sense. The war between the human kingdoms had caused many deaths. It was not in her mother's nature to do something like that. So brainwashing couldn't be ruled out. Also unresolved was how she would get me to kill her, when her allies at least had to know Luka was not capable of such an act.

Then there was the matter of the poachers, a problem that in normal circumstances I would not rest until I resolved. Sea monsters were dying, probably every day! But Cindy and Meia were on it, and the Fishy Pirates had also been made aware of it and by now were probably already patrolling the area.

One problem, however, was resolved. The day after the Magical Girl Competition, Alma Elma showed up with three new allies in tow: the Beelzebubs.

"Alma Elma!" Alice scolded. "I thought I told you not to engage them without backup!"

"No need," Alma Elma shrugged. "I just found them in Yamatai, sitting on a bench, sharing ice cream with Yamata No Orochi."

"This world is scary," Barbarella said, voice quivering.

"No one is afraid of us," Media said, depressed.

"How is no one being afraid of you scary?" I asked. "Did people threaten you? You do have a reputation."

"Reputation?!" Striga exclaimed. "Everyone has been unfailingly polite and friendly towards us!"

"The humans must be so powerful now that they could destroy us with little effort!" Barbarella said, doingva nice job of competing with Remi for biggest scaredy-cat in the castle.

"They don't fear us because they have no reason to fear us!" Media agreed. "If they could tame Yamata No Orochi…."

"See what I mean?" Alma Elma said.

"The world has changed a lot since you terrorized it last," Alice said to the three. "While I'm tempted to play games with you and trick you into thinking the humans could easily overcome you, that's not what's going on. Humans and monsters now get along. Mostly, anyway. You can live in this world as long as you follow some very simple rules."

"Rules?" Striga said haughtily. "We do not answer to anyone!"

"But the Ama Ama Dangos…." Barbarella said.

"I like Ama Ama Dangos," Media sighed.

"You two have grown weak from our long imprisonment," Striga grumbled.

"Look, you three can have all the sweet things and semen you want in this world," I said. "Just don't try to force anyone to do anything they don't want to do."

"And most importantly," Alice added. "No uncontrolled reproduction! I've read your files. You are all powerful enough that you control exactly how many fertile eggs you lay. The reason you were imprisoned wasn't because you were a threat just to the humans. You were a threat to your fellow monsters as well. Some monsters by nature reproduce to quickly. I recently had to remind some slug queens that they had a responsibility to keep it under control. You three must do the same."

"Very well," Striga said reluctantly. "If this world is truly prepared to welcome us and be kind to us, we will limit our reproduction to mere thousands instead of millions."

"Try dozens," Alice said.

"Dozens?! Blasphemy!"

"Even with merely dozens of children, you'll reproduce at an exponential rate. But at least for the first few generations, your children will be able to form their own identity and not live just to make more fly girls. Instead of preying on humans, they'll form attachments to them. They'll have only as many babies as they mutually agree upon."

"Give a man a choice in how many eggs we shove up his anus?" Striga asked, not believing what she was hearing.

"That's how it works," I said. "No raping, definitely no shoving of eggs up anuses."

"They have to do that," Alice cut in. "Sorry, nature isn't always kind."

"Okay, you can shove eggs up anuses, but only willing anuses, and only as many eggs as he consents to. Believe me, any man that would let you do that must love you."

"Very well," Striga said reluctantly. "If this is truly a new world, we shall try to live in it. The alternative is being imprisoned again. It appears that my sisters have lost their will to fight."

"I'd fight for Ama Ama Dangoes!" Media protested.

So the Beelzebubs joined us as castle companions, especially once they heard that we were at war with the Monster Lord, who they hated, despite not having met her. Apparently the Beelzebubs didn't like any Monster Lords. Ironically, that made them more likely to integrate into human society than most monsters. If being nice to humans was an act of rebellion against the Monster Lord, then they would be nice to humans. That would show Alipheese the Fifteenth!

Getting to the next Tartarus meant traveling through the Nightmare Wastes, a new geographic region created by the Great Disaster. Supposedly it was filled with powerful roaming monsters who survived primarily by attacking travelers. I couldn't imagine what travelers were doing in the Nightmare Wastes, as the only feature of interest past the Wastes was the Tartarus itself. That meant the only travelers in the Nightmare Wastes were likely to be adventurers, and very few adventurers could survive a Tartarus and return to tell about it. We were the only adventurers I knew of who had.

Since the Nightmare Wastes were known to be dangerous, I insisted on walking with Alice and whoever else wanted to come with us. Ilias and Sonya were game, as always. In Ilias' case it wasn't too hot, which was the only thing that would keep her in the castle. She hated what sweat did to her lovely blonde hair. Flippy and Flappy provided air cover, Matis and Nanabi provided muscle. Hild, Nuruko, and Promestein were always part of our party when there was a Tartarus to explore. Alma Elma and the Beelzebubs, as well as Cassandra and Emily, stayed in the castle in reserve in case things went badly for us.

As always, traveling in numbers provided a measure of safety. The denizens of the region kept their distance, the smarter ones realizing there was no way to take us by surprise as long as we had harpies flying reconnaissance. I was just beginning to think we would traverse the Wastes without incident when Flappy landed with a report.

"There are forty Youkis massing ahead of us," Flappy reported. "Maybe more by the time you get to their position."

"Sonya," Alice ordered. "Go back into the castle and get our reserves."

"How bad is it?" I asked. "I don't have much experience with Youkis."

"We definitely can't take them lightly," Alice answered. "The Youki are some of the strongest monsters in existence, at least physically. But they are weak to pleasure. And we just so happen to have monsters in reserve who are experts at pleasure."

Indeed, Sonya emerged a few minutes later with Alma Elma, the Beelzebubs, Cassandra, and Emily in tow. Alice briefly explained the situation. Our newer companions seemed quite eager to take on an enemy whose weaknesses they could so easily exploit.

When we got within a few hundred yards of the Youki positions, I decided to try my new spell. I really did need a name for it. Maybe one of my friends would have an idea once they saw it in action, assuming my attempt wasn't a dud. As soon as I saw a few of our opponents, I let loose with several energy bullets from my fingertips. The bullets arced through the air towards the Youki positions, before exploding spectacularly just over their heads. The concussive blast knocked all the Youki that I could see off of their feet.

Alma Elma and company wasted no time exploiting the stunned Youki forces. Alma Elma played with the wind and darted among the Youki who were trying to regain their feet, putting each one back down in seconds with her skilled fingers. The Beelzebubs weren't as efficient, but were still effective, wrapping individual Youki up in their breasts, causing their opponents to cease resistance immediately, lost in the pleasure. Cassandra expanded her mass to swallow up four Youki by herself. I hoped that she remembered and respected my policy about killing and was only pleasuring the monsters. Emily was a swarm of tentacles, wrapping up some while fondling others. Even the harpies got in on the act, using their soft feathers to encourage the Youki who hadn't yet tried to rise to just relax.

By the time the rest of us arrived to the "battle", it was all but over. One particularly robust and brave Youki tried to grab me and we had a brief wrestling match, which I won, mainly because I had Gnome and better skills to compensate for the Youki's strength. Sonya was smart, not getting into a club duel with the much stronger Youki, instead using her holy arrow spell, which she was getting very adept with.

To my relief, Cassandra had not killed anyone, leaving her victims alive and well, although quite spent. She had been more thorough than Alma Elma, who had run from Youki to Youki doing just enough to make them orgasm before moving on to the next. Cassandra had made sure her opponents would stay down for quite some time.

Alice scolded the Youki for being assholes, in her words. Ilias had more colorful descriptions. Since we could always use strong warrior types, one Youki, the one who had weathered the pleasure attacks long enough to grab me, decided to come with us. She introduced herself as Kureha. I immediately liked her. She reminded me of Granberia, although less cultured. And yes, Granberia is cultured!

We arrived at the Tartarus late that night. Alice preferred to camp rather than go back into the castle, mainly because she didn't trust me to not get sucked dry in there. In camp, she felt that she could better keep an eye on me. She did not like for me to be weakened just before particularly dangerous missions. The idea of camping brought out a lot of our monsters who didn't care much about the combat, but loved hanging out. Lime and the imps were particularly enthusiastic about camping. It never hurt that I was cooking.

In the morning, we descended into the Tartarus, using a rope ladder secured magically by Alma Elma, who decided to wait for us rather than enter herself. As usual, we kept the actual Tartarus group small: Alice, myself, Sonya, Ilias, Hild, Promestein, and Nuruko. I didn't really understand Nuruko's interest in the rifts, especially since she didn't seem interested in all of them. But for some reason, this particular Tartarus, she wanted to come with us.

When we reached the bottom, it was obvious what was different. There was no rhyme or reason to the place. Small parts of it looked natural, other parts looked modern and sterile, and still other parts were unidentifiable.

"This place has really seen a lot of chaosization," Ilias noted. "I hope that doesn't mean the world beyond it is dying like that one in Sabasa."

"I don't think there's any relation between the condition of the pit and the world beyond the spacetime doors," Promestein said. "At least I haven't been able to observe any pattern. In any case, the chaosization of this pit seems to have recently stabilized."

"Could that be because Luka has been following the correct history?" Sonya asked.

"Getting the fourth spirit may have done a lot of good," Promestein observed. "because this place…. Oh my Goddess."

"What?" Ilias asked, then she saw it herself.

There were people in the walls, stuck as if they'd materialized within them. Some had been fully or partially transformed into apoptoses. It was a horrible, dark sight. Sonya, for the first time nearly quailed, wanting to run out of there and climb back up the rope ladder. Ilias of all people comforted her and reminded her of her mission. Sonya recovered her bravery readily, remarkable for one so young. This world's Luka would be lucky to have a woman like that, I thought.

"Parts of these walls are from Remina," Promestein noted. "Remina architecture is unique. Unmistakeable if you know what to look for."

"How does Remina end up in so many of these?" Ilias wondered. "I could see that being the case with the Hellgondo rift, as it's on the site of Remina. But why on Sentora, or Ilias Continent?"

Hild and Nuruko insisted on taking the lead. We didn't even receive warning when Hild began firing, doing what she was created to do: take out apoptoses who threatened us. She was brutally efficient at her work, and the apoptoses were more bizarre than ever before. One was in the shape of a harp, another looked like a mummy if a mummy was poorly wrapped and contained an invisible person under the wraps. Then there was a horror, a thing that laughed at us as we fought it, made up of so many beings that I couldn't even tell where its vital parts were. Promestein, as always, took samples.

Finally, we reached another spacetime door. Hild and Nuruko decided they didn't need to go any further. Hild needed more power and had to go get it back in the castle from an organic source(as in, a man), and Nuruko seemed to lose interest once she saw the spacetime door. Ilias asked me to do the honors. I touched it, it swung open, and we were in another place.

"These plants are exactly the same as the ones in the area before," Promestein said. "If I didn't know better, I'd think we were back where we started."

"I don't feel any weirdness in the air," Alice said. "Luka,do you feel anything on the wind?"

"No, but that's not really proof of anything," I answered. "It just means nothing dangerous is coming at us."

"No, I agree, Alice," Ilias said. "This place is stable. The most stable place we've been since Rostrum."

"So what do we do?" Sonya asked. "This place looks like home, but we're far from any settlements. It's not like we can get information from anyone."

"Since this place is stable, maybe we have time to go to Succubus Village?" I asked.

"Of course," Alice said sarcastically. "Gotta go to Succubus Village in every universe, don't you?"

"I mean, we could walk even further, but…"

"No, you're right," Alice sighed. "We'll go to Succubus Village. It's still early. If we hurry, we can get there by nightfall."

We actually arrived much sooner than nightfall. There were no Nightmare Wastes between the Tartarus and Succubus Village. It was a straight, pleasant walk. By mid afternoon, we entered another version of Succubus Village.

"This looks pretty much the same, but something doesn't feel right," Alice said.

"Yeah, I see no fornicating in the streets," Ilias observed.

"There's that," Sonya agreed. "But the clothes are the tip off. The clothes like really out of style."

"Hmmmm…" Ilias mused. "This world could be behind ours chronologically."

"How does that even work?" I wondered.

"When worlds branch off, they end up moving at different speeds through time relative to one another," Promestein explained.

"Hey, you, Citizen A!" Alice yelled.

"Me?" a male citizen asked uncertainly. "Is there something you need from me?"

""What year is it?"

"Um…. It's 965. Are you okay little monster?"

"965!?" Ilias exclaimed. "That's…."

"The year Heinrich killed the Monster Lord," I finished. I had read and learned my history well.

"Actually, it was 966," Sonya said proudly. "Which means we could actually run into Heinrich here!"

"Heinrich, here?" a passing youth scoffed. "Why would he ever come to a Podunk town like this? He's a real hero! Did you hear about how he dealt with the Black Nobles in Sabasa?"

"Monsters!" someone cried.

Alice looked around, wondering if someone had just been freaked out by her appearance. Although I knew tolerance for monsters was not high in this time period, monsters that were children were generally not lynched on sight, especially on Sentora(Ilias Continent would have been a different story).

"Is there an attack?!" Ilias demanded, shaking a villager that tried to run past us to flee. "Is that horrible Black Alice attacking this village with her armies?!"

"Armies?!" the villager asked, confused. "The Monster Lord doesn't have armies. She just lets monsters run wild! Encourages them, even! It's just a raiding party, but what can we do about even that?"

"So what, you just run around in circles and panic?!" Alice asked.

"No, we flee to the north! There's terrain up there that's easy to hide in!"

"Sonya," I said. "I think this is a job for us. Maybe Heinrich's too good to come to a village like this, but that's not us, is it?"

"Nope, we're definitely not too good!" Sonya agreed.

"Not what I was going for, but…. Let's just go and see about protecting these people."

Many residents were fleeing, but others had taken shelter in their homes, locking their doors and closing their windows. My companions and I raced through the village, looking for the threat. Soon enough, we ran into a squad of soldiers standing in front of a home, trying to surround it. I asked the soldier who looked like the leader what was going on.

"It's the Queen Succubi!" he explained. "They are holed up in that house!"

"Why would powerful succubi hide in a house?" Alice wondered. "Even normal succubi should be able to easily subdue a few common males."

"I have no idea, but I'm sure they are up to something!" the soldier insisted.

"You're an idiot, but you're probably not wrong. Stay out here. We're an elite force. We'll take care of these succubi ourselves."

"Excuse me," the leader said, addressing me. "Are you Heinrich? I didn't know Heinrich traveled with monsters."

I started to answer, but Ilias jumped in front of me. "Yes, this is Heinrich!" Ilias said quickly. "The monster is his slave, one of many he's conquered on his journeys!"

"Excuse me?" Alice retorted.

"Anyway," Ilias continued. "We'll go in there and resolve that little problem for you."

"Thank you, Heinrich!" the leader said. Other soldiers enthusiastically expressed their agreement. "We always knew you would be here for us when we really needed you!"

I assured them it was really no problem at all and we rushed into the house. No one was there.

"Basement," Alice said. "The stench of succubus is strong and coming from below us."

We found a trap door that led to the basement and descended. The basement was obviously a secret lair, one that a lot of magic had been practiced in. Pentagrams and magical runes were everywhere. It was not a recent renovation. Even I could tell that much.

"They've probably been down here practicing their sinful magic for years," Ilias said, disgusted.

Turning a corner, I saw who the Queen Succubi were. They were familiar faces. Lilith and Lilim. Not the Lilith from the Monster World, but the Lilith that Succubus Witch had summoned so long ago back in my world. This must have been their original time.

"Oh?" Lilith said, getting a look at our group. "We were hoping for a crowd of soldiers. What a weird group. Two angels, a human female, a lamia, and just one boy?"

"How disappointing," Lilim complained. "I was looking forward to lots of semen."

"Take a better look, Lilim," Lilith said. "That hero's semen will be far more satisfying than the semen from a bunch of mere soldiers."

"Are you the hero Heinrich we've heard so much about?" Lilim asked. "You look a little young."

"Sorry to disappoint you," I said. "But I'm the hero Luka."

"Luka?" Lilith said. "That's a name unfamiliar to us."

"But he smells so delicious!" Lilim said. "Don't you want to just eat him up, sister?"

"Stay sharp, Luka," Ilias warned. "These sisters were famous for being close to Black Alice."

"You stay sharp!" Alice responded. "You're even weaker to pleasure attacks than Luka is!"

A quick word about the more powerful succubi and why they are so dangerous. The first part you know. They have the most potent pleasure attacks in existence. Even if they don't make you come in seconds, rendering you helpless, the pleasure is so strong that most people cease resistance at the first touch. Some have even been known to make requests before being touched! Some monsters can one shot you. A succubus can ZERO shot you just by being so damned sexy that you don't want to resist in the first place!

You're probably also aware of how the power of wind makes them incredibly quick. So not only can they one shot you with pleasure, they can do it before you can react, and even if you can withstand it, they are too fast to hit.

But those talents still leave succubi with some weaknesses. They tend to be physically weak and vulnerable. Hit them and they quickly lose their will to fight. They also aren't good at fighting groups unless everyone in the group is very vulnerable to pleasure attacks, such as a group of male soldiers. Fortunately, my group only had two members who were weak to pleasure: myself and Ilias. Alice was pretty resistant, Sonya was as well, mostly due to sheer stubbornness and outrage at the perversity of it all, and Promestein could barely feel pleasure at all(although that didn't mean she couldn't be brought to orgasm. It just took longer.)

So we had the two sisters outnumbered and outmuscled. Despite their power, it should have been an easy win, right? Wrong. Despite being a little insane, the two sisters were clever. If the problem was that they had opponents who were resistant to pleasure attacks, the solution was to isolate me from my companions. This they did by summoning a powerful but focused gust of wind which blew my companions back, and continued to blow them around the nearest corner. It wouldn't have surprised me if that wind carried my friends all the way back up the stairs and out the door.

Before I could even take in that I was facing the two alone once again, they had brought me down and both of their mouths were already on my penis, lewdly kissing each other with my penis in between, their most famous oral technique, a trademark of sorts. Why sisters are so into each other that way is a disturbing question, which I'm sure has a disturbing answer. But we're talking about succubi here, so there isn't much that they won't do.

I summoned Gnome to throw the two very light but deceptively strong succubi off of me, but Lilim stopped her share of the licking long enough to cast a spell that caused me to be affixed to the floor as if I was tied up there. That was a new wrinkle, one I hadn't encountered the first time I'd fought them. That first time had been an alley, outdoors. This was their home base, where their magic would be at its strongest.

While I tried to figure out what to do next, my mind went white and I erupted between their exploring lips and tongues. They eagerly licked the semen off of me and each other's faces. My only chance would be to use my power or hope for my friends to return and rescue me.

"What should we do next, sister?" Lilim asked, standing up and admiring my prone form, penis still rock hard.

"Let's step on it!" Lilith said, rubbing her foot on my dick, crushing it against my belly.

"Some hero!" Lilim said tauntingly. "I'm sure you're strong, but you're not too bright, coming in here and facing us in our own lair!"

"Normally we'd have our way with you any way we want," Lilith said, her foot twisting as she tortured my penis. "But since your friends are coming to rescue you, we'll grant you a request. Since you're still technically in the fight."

"I'll beat you," I said with determination. "This spell has to wear off at some point."

"Oh, darling," Lilim laughed. "It's already worn off. Why don't you try to get up?"

Even with Gnome, at my current strength I could not get up as long as their two feet were pinning me down. I would just have to wait for my friends and somehow endure these two horrible women. Yes, horrible. Such loathsome creatures. I wondered if they'd give me those special dual kisses again.

The sisters didn't even stop torturing me with their feet as my friends rounded the corner, full of piss and vinegar, outraged at the sight of me at their mercy. I thought for sure that Lilth and Lilim were screwed, but they were more than mere succubi. They were powerful witches as well. This time it was Lilith who held out her hand, summoning tentacles to erupt out of her hand, grabbing all of my friends. Sonya and Ilias fell victim to the probing tentacles within seconds. Ilias was no surprise, her eyes rolling back into her head as she shook and bucked under the assault. Sonya was more of a surprise, although even she could be excused. She was dealing with powerful succubus magic, and she was only human.

"Ah…. Ah!! I'm sorry, Luka," Sonya said, her head lolling to the side.

"Now that we've got them neutralized, what should we do to extract more of that delicious semen out of him?" Lilith asked. "As much as I love to use my feet, it doesn't seem to be getting the job done as quickly as I'd like."

"Ooh, he likes being between us!" Lilim said excitedly. "Let's put him between our breasts this time!"

Dropping down, my penis sank between two pairs of very generous, very soft breasts, pressed together all the more firmly because the sisters went back to kissing each other. Their breasts ground against my penis as they enjoyed each other's taste, their saliva dripping down, making their breasts moist, enhancing the already incredible stimulation. I came again, causing them to bring their mouths back down to lick it all up, off of my penis and off of each other's breasts.

Alice, enraged, burst out of the tentacle bonds and came barreling at the sisters, picking up my sword and attacking them with a vengeance. She was bringing spells as well, not so much for offense, but to counter what the sisters tried to do to stop her. Let it not be said that Alice doesn't adjust on the fly. She was as good as a Heavenly Knight in that respect, if not better. The sisters, on the other hand, while powerful in their own lair, had nothing new to show Alice. They tried to blow her away with wind. Alice dispelled the wind before it could knock her back more than a few feet, They tried the tentacles again. Alice burned them. Her rage was enhancing her power. She was still diminished, however. And she was only one small lamia facing two legendary succubi.

Promestein had rejoined the fight. She blasted the sisters with two small bolts of holy energy, long enough to get Alice's attention and toss her something. Alice seemed to know exactly what the device was, because the little Monster Lord turned back to her opponents, grasping the device. Alice cast a quick frost spell, nothing compared to her Omega Frost spell that she could use in her true form, but enough to activate the strange device Promestein had given her. Turns out that Promestein had not been only studying La Croix's notes. Ever the multitasker, she had been trying to solve the problem of Ilias and Alice's diminished power, and that device was a prototype. The particular device in Alice's hand only worked with cold spells. The end result was that Alice's little cold spell turned into an Omega Frost spell once it was translated through the device. The two sisters were frozen into blocks of ice. The battle was over.

"Dang, Alice!" I said, still prone on the ground.

Promestein took the device back from Alice, who smiled appreciatively at the angel scientist.

"So, you obscene sisters, what shall I do with you?" Alice asked. "I know you two can hear me. I suppose I could punch you and shatter you into a thousand pieces. Or maybe I'll just use the sword and seal you."

The sisters gave no sign that they could hear anything Alice said, but if Alice said they could still hear, then I had to assume it was true. It was no less than they deserved. They would have definitely killed me if I had been alone.

"Hey!" a voice shouted in the basement from behind us. "Is anyone still down here?"

Two figures ran into the room, one a young adventurer, the other a witch with the stereotypical pointy hat. She was a pretty blonde woman, although I couldn't see her clearly seeing as how I was still flat on my back.

"It looks like there was a positively wonderful party in here, Heinrich!" the witch exclaimed. "It's too bad we missed it."

"Yeah, I can see that," Heinrich replied, staring at the two frozen succubus sisters. "It looks like no one got seriously hurt, so that's good at least."

"Heinrich, is that you?" Ilias asked, weakly rising to her feet.

"The one and only," he confirmed with a smile. "I was told that a group of passing heroes came down here todeal with those sisters. I hurried as fast as I could, but it looks like you took care of it. With some casualties, but that's to be expected, I guess."

Hearing that I was in the same room as Heinrich gave me renewed energy. I popped back up to my feet and immediately faceplanted.

"Whoa there!" Heinrich said jovially, helping me up. "Since your naked, I'm assuming you got CE'd."

"CE'd?" I asked.

"Critical Ecstasy'd," his witch companion laughed. "Heinie likes to make abbreviations out of everything."

"So wow," I said. "You're Heinrich. In the flesh. It's an honor to meet you."

I'm sure everyone remembers that I got to meet Heinrich as a ghost. But that's an entirely different experience than meeting the man himself, live and in person. In truth, he wasn't much. He was actually less impressive physically than I was. I assumed he must have gotten attacked a lot by monsters unaware of how strong he really was.

"You're an interesting looking hero," Heinrich's witch friend observed.

I turned to look at Heinrich's companion and my jaw dropped. She was a little older looking, so if I hadn't been paying close attention I would not have known who she was. Especially if I stared at her chest, which was much more full than the young tween form she chose for herself after her "death". But what really gave it away was the small rabbit insignia on her hat. I was looking at Black Alice, the current Monster Lord.

"Oh, I almost forgot," Heinrich said, "This is the mage Alicetroemeria. She's my traveling companion."

"That's me!" Alicetroemeria said exuberantly. "Pleased to meet all of you very wondrous people!"

I was wondering why no one else had said anything. Well, Sonya was still unconscious and Promestein was checking her for injuries. But Alice and Ilias hadn't taken their eyes off of Alicetroemeria since she'd entered the room. They were both speechless.

"Oh, how unusual to see an angel on the surface," Alicetroemeria cooed. "Are you lost little angel? Ufufufu… And a cute little blue lamia too! Ufufufu…"

"What the hell are you trying to pull?" Alice asked, finally finding her words.

"Whatever do you mean?" Alicetroemeria asked innocently. "I'm just your normal, everyday uberpowerful mage."

"I wonder what we should do with those sisters," Heinrich asked. "Do you think we should kill them? Given their crimes, I think it's more than justified, but it seems dishonorable to do it to them while they are helpless."

"That really would be no fun at all," Alicetroemeria agreed. "I think I'll just send them away."

Waving her hand, the two sisters vanished.

"Well, now that that's taken care of," Heinrich said. "Why don't you join us at this village's lone inn? We can trade stories of our adventures."

"You're not even going to ask where she sent the sisters?!" Ilias asked in outrage.

"I'm sure she sent them where they won't hurt anyone," Heinrich replied mildly. "I trust her completely."

"Why are all the greatest heroes idiots?" Alice asked. "is it some kind of prerequisite? The intelligent need not apply?"

Ilias diplomatically told Heinrich and his perfectly normal friend that we'd meet them at the inn after taking care of a few unspecified things. The first thing I learned about the legendary hero was that he accepted everything everyone told him at face value. It was as if he'd never hard a lie in his life.

"Ilias?" I asked. "How did Heinrich survive long enough to face the Monster Lord?"

"I wish I could remember," Ilias sighed. "Seeing him again… He makes you look like a genius."

"Part of it has to be the way she's toying with him," Alice noted. "She's probably protecting him from his own idiocy because it amuses her. She probably thinks she'll just eat him when she's finally bored of him."

"That girl is playing with fire," Ilias retorted. "She has no idea how dangerous that man truly is. Oh well!"

Ilias shrugged and helped the now conscious Sonya up.

"Wow, that was…." Sonya breathed. "Just. Wow. I've never felt anything like that before. Did I miss anything?"

"Nothing important," Alice muttered. "It turns out this Tartarus has taken us to Idiot World."

With everyone awake and moving around, we made out way towards the village's only inn.

"Be ready to teleport us back home at a moment's notice!" Ilias warned. "That witch is dangerous!"

"I know, I recognized her too," I replied. "I'm just… gobsmacked. I never read that Heinrich traveled with the Monster Lord. I traveled with the Monster Lord too!"

"Monster Lords are arrogant," Ilias said. "It amuses them to toy with their prey. They are so confident in their power but have no idea what a truly motivated man is capable of."

"More like a truly idiotic man," Alice retorted. "Why are all of your heroes so stupid, Ilias?"

"They aren't stupid!" Ilias protested. "just a little naïve. I like them that way."

"So they don't see through your crap, I'm guessing!"

"Exactly. No, wait…. Anyway, I'm sure you'll agree that I did the right thing by sending Heinrich after Black Alice."

"I guess," Alice agreed reluctantly. "So why did it end up going as badly for you as it did for her?"

"That's…. that's an uncomfortable story," Ilias admitted. "I can't tell you right now. Not because I'm hiding anything, but because I honestly don't remember much of it. I remember that he slew Black Alice, then he came to heaven and massacred many of my angels."

"Why are we talking about Heinrich, again?" Sonya asked.

"You'll see," I smiled.

"Heinrich's at the inn," Alice said. "Along with his 'friend', Black Alice."

"Black Alice?!" Sonya exclaimed. "So that's what you meant by that witch being dangerous?"

"We might be safe," Ilias said. "She's enjoying her little game right now. As you know, Sonya, it comes back to bite her in her plump ass."

"I wonder why we're here, though?" I asked. "In the true history, Heinrich sealed the sisters. If anything, we got in the way. We can't be here just to see five hundred years into the past. We know the past, roughly.The only real new piece of information is the fact that Heinrich was unknowingly traveling with the Monster Lord during his adventure."

"Unless that's the difference," Alice noted. "Maybe that changes everything in this world."

"Nope," Ilias said. "That's the way it happened on my world as well. I just never allowed the history to be written that way."

We arrived at the inn and went upstairs, where we found Heinrich and Alicetroemeria occupying a room with two beds. Interesting, I thought. I wondered if they were…. Intimate, the way Alice and I were. The two beds meant nothing, of course. Alice would come to my bed to have her way with me, then sleep in her own bed. I wondered if it ran in the family.

"Hey there!" Heinrich said jovially. "Come take seat. I'm so happy I get to talk to another hero my age for once."

Heinrich did most of the talking, telling us of his battle with the Black Nobles, Black Alice's version of the Heavenly Knights, but not nearly as powerful. According to the history books I'd read, Black Alice didn't trust anyone powerful enough to challenge her. The Nobles were no weaklings, but it was Tamamo's opinion that any one Knight could dispose of all three Black Nobles with ease.

"And thus, I was somehow able to achieve victory over the Black Nobles," Heinrich finished. "If they were just a bit more clever, I wouldn't be sitting here today. But enough about me. Where are you folks from?"

"Careful…." Ilias mumbled.

"I'm from Ilias Village," I said,which was mostly the truth.

"Iliasville?" Heinrich asked. "You must be a proper baptized hero, then. I was never actually baptized, so I'm a hero in name only."

"But you're still much more powerful than any of those other heroes," Alicetroemeria said, affectionately squeezing Heinrich's hand. Oh yeah, I thought. These two are an item.

"Well it's been wonderful meeting you two!" Ilias gushed without an ounce of authenticity. "We really do need to continue on our way, though. Luka, would you please teleport us back home?"

"Anywhere in particular?" I asked.

"How about saving us the walk and just take us to Succubus Village?" Alice suggested.

"But you already are in Succubus Village," Heinrich pointed out.

"No, she's talking about another Succubus Village," I said, completely confusing the poor man.

Since no one seemed to have anything else useful to say, I just closed my eyes and imagined us back at Succubus Village. As always, I was unerringly accurate, bringing us to the entrance. I smiled in satisfaction. That had been an interesting, but mostly uneventful trip into another world. Well, uneventful if you consider being raped by two powerful succubi to be a normal day. Welcome to my life.

"Home sweet home!" I said, even though this wasn't really my world. Then again, did I even have a world anymore? I guess this paradoxical world was my new home, at least for the time being.

I turned to look at my friends. Alice, Ilias, Sonya, Promestein, and Alicetroemeria. Wait….

"Black Alice?!" I exclaimed.

"Ufufufufu….."