The Madman Part 3

The Madman Part 3

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"Let me see how you use a sword."

I glanced up at Io from the pad in my hands, double checking it to make sure I had every measurement I needed, "Oh?"

"I need to have an idea what I'm making this sword for." Io was honestly pretty in the first place, if a bit masculine. But while she was prettier when she smiled, honestly? I think I preferred the smirk she had going on now.

For a moment, I opened my mouth to say I had a good idea what I wanted before I stopped, closing it with a small smile. She was the expert here, "Do you have something of about the right shape already?"

"Yeah, come on, I've got something in the back that we took from my old shop."

-o Io o-​

Florida was a weird thing.

I believed him when he said that he could and would give me a new arm, though it was hard to put a finger on why.

My lips pursed as I watched him go through a kata, his body practically singing. He'd turned himself into metal, and every movement was accompanied by audible groans and hums of various pitches and tones as he moved, the metal of his body twisting and bending in a melody of death.

I just… how do you react to someone who'll do that? Just give you a new arm?

His style was workman-like, simple and practical, with a seemingly randomized staccato of strikes, primarily having just one hand on the hilt, but not infrequently using two. I could see why he wanted a straight blade, he used stabbing strikes rather often. He had two strange things about the style though, he half-sworded often and had this weird thing where he would brace the flat of the blade against his body or bounce it off of himself to change its direction quickly. The style seemed idealized to be used with a pistol or second sword… But I could work with that.

He was going to give me back my life, I couldn't… I could keep forging with one arm but it wasn't the same. But… if he could… when he did this… I'd repay him with a wonder.

"Is that the best you've got?" I asked with a smirk.

"Tcheh," he raised the sword above his head in both hands, grinning and making my eyebrows go up, his green eyes dancing with amusement in the light of the smelter behind him, "Strength of Steel."

There was a strange sound and he suddenly gained nearly a foot of height, his shirt and pants nearly busting at the seams as his muscles bulged. I blinked in confusion, staring as he brought his sword down. I was surprised he hadn't torn his way out of his boots and pants, though more of his boots were visible now.

He'd gone from a lean swimmers' build to something I'd have expected from a soldier with bulging muscles. His hands were bigger too… I'd have to make sure the handle was able to deal with both sizes…

I blinked before smirking, "… well that's impressive, but are you actually stronger?"

"Tchahahah! Bitch please!"

-o Bonney o-​

"Daniel, get on the other side of that door! Tom, what do they want?"

"Ah, they want Florida."

"Tch, well fuck'em. Lucca, Daniel, I'll go make an opening, give me some covering fire. Casey, Wallace, Jaime, I want you out after they lay the covering fire. Tom, keep the crew safe, I don't want any of them getting in here, lock up the doors and windows. If they haven't surrounded us, send someone out to get to the ship."

I began to walk towards the door, adding as an afterthought, "And keep the locals out of the way, I don't want to hear Florida whine about that."

I was sure I saw a smirk on some of the crews faces, but they could fuck right off.

"Now now!" A prim and proper ass voice called out through the doorway and I paused, "This doesn't need to end in violence dears!"

Raising an eyebrow, I considered it for a moment. I didn't want my crew getting shot at just for the sake of getting shot at… though this was probably a trap. Still, I was confident I could handle the shit if it was. I kept walking.

About four dozen guns were leveled at me as I walked out of the tavern and stopped a few feet into the street. Fucking hell, the whole street was filled with these assholes. There was an empty area just around the entrance to the tavern I'd been enjoying my meal in, but the entrance was circled by these asswipes and the street was pretty well filled by them in both directions, not to mention the line of them opposite us.

I planted my hands on my hips and shouted, "Oi! What the hell do you chucklefucks want?!"

The line of idiots split and some old hag in a stupid floral dress stepped up, stopping about a dozen feet away and still flanked by about a dozen asswipes on either side of her. She had this black hair in this stupid housewife sort of cut with some gray streaks and light skin with a few wrinkles, she'd gone way too heavy with the fucking make-up. Seriously, what the fuck were you doing? There's a reason I didn't use much lipstick.

"Now now, ladies shouldn't talk like that." The bitch had the audacity to waggle her finger at me. Seriously?

… also, why the fuck is there teen here? Who's the stupid fuck? I know I haven't used my ability like that on this island! He was probably related to the old hag, same hair, same eyes, same stupid sneer. His green jacket was pretty stupid too, with a pair of sixes, one backwards.

I rolled my eyes, "Whatever, just answer the damn question."

The bitch sniffed disdainfully at me, "We're looking for Scholar Florida."

"He's not here." I said simply.

She smiled in a way that was probably supposed to be sweet, "Then where is he?"

"Don't know." I half grunted, "Why do you want him?"

"Now now." Is this bitch really wagging her finger at me again? "Good girls don't lie."

The mass of chucklefucks were organized now, more so than they had been when they'd first started coming off of the ship. They were grouped up in little clusters in similar outfits and equipment, though they all had this little bib thing with the symbol on it that was on the sails of their ships. They were obviously foreigners, though there were a few dark-skinned members, but I'm betting the locals had hauled ass like smart people. Good, wouldn't have to worry about Ironhide whining at me about how civilians had been killed. About a half dozen of the groups had swords and axes, a bakers dozen had guns, and the teen with the stupid axes was beside the old hag.

"Still don't know, bitch. Now answer my question."

She twitched. Oh, didn't like people talking back? "Whenever will he be back?"

I sighed, brushing my hair out of my face, "Okay, listen up you stupid fucking hag. If you want Florida for his bounty then you're in over your fucking head. He'll tear you a new asshole, and not in the way your wrinkly ass would appreciate." Her face took on a look like she'd sucked on a fucking lemon at that. Hah!

The bitch visibly composed herself before talking, "We were rather hoping to make him a job offer."

Now it was my turn to twitch. As much of a pain as Jacob could be about some shit, he was a fucking golden turtle, just shitting out good stuff. No way in hell I'd be okay with some shits coming and trying to take him from me.

A smirk began to spread across my face.

The good news though was that I doubted he would take them up on their offer, especially if they were just opening up on a tavern like that.

"Too bad, he works for me."

"Now now, 'Glutton' Bonney," she said with that fucking finger waggle, "If you are going to be so dreadfully uncooperative, Momma will have to wash your mouth out with soap and give you a spanking."

While more than a few of the stupid fucks around her looked really eager to see that bullshit, I twitched. "Bitch, you aren't my mom. I don't want you to be my mom. My mom would have split you in two with a butterknife. And if you say that shit again, I will kick you into fucking diapers."

"Now now, don't be so uncouth dear. Little girls shouldn't say words like that."

I blinked.

Then I blinked again.

"… what did I just fucking say?" I growled.

"Boys?" she made this dainty ass 'get to it gesture', "Make Momma proud."

I snarled as my legs bunched and I launched myself through the air, "Jerky Shot!"

Two of the hag's 'little boys' literally leapt in front of her as I flew forward, my foot burying itself in one of their faces–

*Bullets-!*.

"Tch-!" I launched myself off of him, sending his head reeling back and his new long white beard flapping as the idiots around him opened fire, the bullets whizzing through the space I'd occupied. The dumbass dropped to the dirt, very unconscious, missing some teeth and blood trickling out of his broken nose and mouth.

And the bitch still had that haughty look going on as she waved her hand outwards, "Squads two through five! Open fire!"

"Yes Momma!"

'Okay, fuck that bullshit.' I didn't want to risk those stupid axes the teen had just yet, and I needed to draw attention away from the door so that the rest of my crew could get out…

"Ten steps at once… Soru!" The world blurred around me as I launched myself down the street and away from the docks, slamming into right into one of the groups of idiots. Still hadn't gotten the stopping part of this trick down, no matter how Florida tried to explain it, and aiming it wasn't something I'd gotten the hang of either.

So I didn't.

I body checked my way straight through the line of idiots, sending them flying like gray-haired bowling pins.

Without stopping, I rolled forward into another group of them with swords, my fingers digging into the dirt as I did a handstand and my legs lashing out as I began to spin, "Veal Blender!" The dozen sword-wielding dumbasses were sent flying, their clothes suddenly looser as I kicked the age right out of them.

"Spear squad! Forward! Make Momma proud!"

"Yes Momma!"

I landed on my feet, raising my hands as the idiots charged at me. My crew should be moving just about–

Eight shots rang out, and nine dumbasses fell, immediately followed by a familiar war-cry, "For Glory!"

"Trying again beardy?!" The stupid teen shouted as he charged to meet the three swordsmen that charged out of the tavern.

As I slammed into another mass of the idiots, Wallace clashed with the teen, his sword locking with those fucked up axes even as Jaime dove into the mass of idiots flanking the teen, his rapier flashing about as he kept the chaff from flanking Wallace. The kilt-wearing swordsman pressed back against the teen, but made no progress even as Jaime darted around him, rapier flashing in the light.

Casey literally bounced out of the tavern and down the street in the direction of the ocean, stopping in the middle of the crowd of idiots and gesturing grandly, "Gyihihihihihihi~! I am Casey Tibbs! The Gelatin Man–!"

"Less laughing more hitting!" I snapped as I ducked beneath a round of bullets and kicked the offending fuck in the face.

"Right-! Gelatin Rain!" The large man began to spin like a top, turning blue as bits of him flew off and began to bounce around through the mass of chucklefucks. Knocking out teeth, windows, and cracking the wooden doors of the buildings.

But now, as bullets flew from the doorway of the tavern to pin down the assholes in the street, and Wallace had the stupid teen occupied, I had an opening to go for the old hag. She was only defended by a few of her chucklefucks, shouting out orders, and she was obviously the lynchpin of this mob. If I took her out, it'd throw them into disarray.

My legs bunched up as I crouched and I launched myself at the group of idiots, spinning through the air as the world blurred around me. But before I could plant my boot where it belonged, in that bitches face, a trio of her dumbasses in those stupid bibs literally threw themselves in the way!

For just an instant, my eyes met the bitch's and she fucking smirked up at me as I hung in the air, the toe of my boot deforming the cheek of the first chucklefuck. 'Oh fuck no.'

With a snarl I twisted my torso and sent the first asshole flying into the other three–

*Smack-!*

I stumbled to a stop, blinking as I stared in disbelief at the salt and pepper haired bitch who had a hand extended. "… did you just fucking smack mmmph–?!" I was cut off when she shoved a fucking bar of soap in my mouth! What the fuck?!

Reflexively, I recoiled and spat the soap out even as two more of the idiots that had been flanking her grabbed my elbows and the bitch just fucking ran away, "Pbbbta! Come back here-!" The pair of chucklefucks tried to drag me back off, but fuck them, I poured age outwards and elbowed the now old men off of me– another just grabbed me around the waist-! "Damnit! Get–!" I reared back my fist and brought it down into the fucks cheek, knocking his ass right out, "Off!"

Kicking away another of the idiots, some squeaking drew my attention. My head snapped up as the crowd of the idiots parted and a pair of fucking fifteen pound guns were leveled at us, the bitch standing between them, "Shit-! Casey, get down-!"

"Momma says fire!" She threw her arm forward and I launched up into the air.

The guns boomed and the blue mass that was Casey spun to a stop, "Wha-?" The black-gray mass of cannonball blasted right through him, scattering him all over the street before it continued into their own forces.

But the other one was aimed at me.

My leg lashed out as I snarled, and my shin slammed into the oncoming cannonball. I hung there in the air, clashing with the cannonball, gritting my teeth as I pushed against it, it was like kicking Florida, just kick it really fucking hard!

My leg snapped out to full extension and the cannonball went flying off into one of the nearby buildings, the explosion taking out a portion of the upper floor.

Silence hung in the street as I dropped to the ground, my lips pressing into a thin line. I glared at the bitch behind the gun and decidedly ignored the throbbing of my shin as I pulled age from the area. It hadn't been broken but fucking ow. I glanced at the mass of blue gelatin that had been Casey... it was quivering... but all of the bits that had been bouncing around had splattered against walls or people... was he okay?

Within a moment, the quivering masses began to slowly ooze and roll towards the central mess in the street and I bit back a sigh of relief. I turned back to look at the bitch organizing this mess even as her crowd of dickwaffles surrounding us stared in silence. We stood in the wide street at the center of a relatively clear space, the melee of my two swordsmen against the squad of sword wielding jackasses supporting the teen still going on and surrounded by a ring of assholes that filled the rest of the street.

The old hag stared, eyes wide in surprise and shock. I grinned, 'How about them apples bitch?'

Then her eyes narrowed and she gave this haughty sniff, "Now now, that was rather rude."

"Now now," I mocked before growling out, "Shut the fuck up and either leave us alone or I start wrecking the rest of you."

"So you're stronger than your bounty would indicate," she raised a hand and snapped her fingers, and there was the squeak of wheels as a half dozen more, smaller cannons were rolled up, the crowd of idiots that filled the street parting to give them a line of fire at me as well as my swordsmen who were still engaged. My eyes widened as she continued, "We'll just have to turn in your head and hope that the less violent boys in your crew are more willing to work with momma. Six sweetie!"

'Shit-! She'd shoot her own people?! The fuck kind of comrades are they?!'

"Yes momma!" The kid broke the blade lock he had with Wallace and danced back, but before my swordsmen could pursue, a line of idiots opened fire.

With him out of the way, there were still almost two dozen of these idiots in various states of bleeding or age scattered across the dirt in the center of the ring of assholes, not to mention all of the chuckleheads behind us, the fuck was she thinking?!

Jaime lunged forward, his rapier dancing about as he tried to deflect all of the bullets, but some got through, grazing him and several slamming home into Wallace. The bearded man let out a roar of pain, stumbling.

"Open fire!"

---​

"Alright, it's going to be a bit before I can get this thing done, but given a few weeks I should have a solid prototype. I'm going to be out of town for a while though."

Io ruffled my hair with her hand, the spiky mess shifting about as the significantly taller woman grinned, "I'll see about that sword."

I shook my head in slight disbelief. If she could seriously make a fucking Supreme Grade sword… hell, even a Great Grade sword, then instead of me overpaying her, she'd be overpaying me. I wasn't sure I was totally okay with that honestly…

I gave Io a small shove and–

*Boom!*

… a frown spread across my face and I turned towards the sound, "Did you just hear an explosion?"

Io scowled, looking in the same direction, "Yes... what do you think it is?"

"If it's what I think it is, I'm going to be very, very unhappy." I said softly.

"Your girlfriend?"

"… not what I was thinking about, but if you're talking about who I think you're talking about, then that is a possibility, though I'll be even madder if that's her." Really hoped it wasn't Bonney. Though I had a bad feeling it was Baroque works. I'd tried to be nice and avoid just killing Miss Monday because I didn't remember what her part of the story was in One Piece and I didn't want to cause too much of a crazy butterfly effect. The Strawhat's did more good than they did bad and I didn't want throw them off somehow.

But my crew took precedence over that. No questions.

'If this is Baroque Works Ima be so mad.'

"What do you think it is?" Io prompted beside me as we stood outside of the smithery, hand on her hip.

"I'm afraid it's my crew getting in trouble." I grumbled as I pushed my hat further down on my head and picked up my coat, looking at it and the little glittering feathers that peeked out of it as I did, "Hold on, we're gonna be pushing it."

"You're going then?"

"Yeah." I threw my coat over my shoulders and clasped it into place as a cape. 'Never like putting my face in the way of bullets or swords, but the risk of it being the crew that's in trouble... it's too great. If it's just people messing around, fine. If it's someone just killing people or someone attacking the Bonney Pirates, I'll interfere. I mean… I can be bullet-proof after all…'

Io's big hand settled on my shoulder, "You sure? That sounded like cannonfire."

"Yeah… I'm sure. They're… well, they're family."

Honey eyes were locked on my own green ones before she nodded, giving my shoulder a squeeze, "Be safe. I do want that new arm." She gave me a cheeky grin at that.

"Don't worry," I rapped my knuckles against my long sleeved shirt with a few clangs, having turned both to metal, "Metal remember?"

She snorted as I turned, "Right."

"I'll swing back by in a while." My legs bunched up as I half crouched, "Iron Steps." The world blurred around me as I launched into the air.

---

The Madman Part 3 End