A starry night

Sitting on my couch, I was thinking about the upcoming day. Tomorrow was the day where I would have to prove myself, the day when I would finally show everyone what I could do.

It was still just the beginning of the semester and there was a lot more to be done before I could be content, but there was no question about it; this was my first real step toward my goals.

The night was still young, the time was just about half past eight. Although I had spent a bit of time sparring against Mike today as well, we had ended it early to make sure my body was in a good condition tomorrow. Sadly, this ended in me becoming incredibly restless. I wasn't used to coming home with energy to spare.

'What do I do with the rest of the night?'

Yesterday I had come back after talking with Suzuka, instantly falling asleep, just to wake up at five in the morning. My body still held its sleep schedule religiously, it was almost always impossible for me to sleep for more than 4 hours. That meant that if I went to bed now, I would wake up in the middle of the night. It would be awful to have to stay awake for more than eight hours, waiting for the time of the duel, and I had no plans to do so.

So I had to find something to fill my time with and in the end, I decided to do something I had not done in a long time; run. Not run as to train, but just run without thinking about anything. As I was still wearing my training wear, I only had to put on my trainers before I opened the door to exit my dorm, but something stopped me just outside. Or rather, someone.

"Hi. Do you have some time?"

A golden-haired succubus was standing in front of me, seemingly having come with the intention of just now knocking on my door. I can't say I was all too happy about her sudden visit. No, it actually made me incredibly unhappy to see her face in this kind of situation. But I was not one to not learn from my mistakes. If she wanted to talk, then we would talk.

"I do. Let's take a walk."

We walked in silence out of the Aquarius, strolling down the streets in order to find a suitable place for our conversation. I did not want to invite her into my apartment, that felt too close to my private sphere. After a couple of minutes, we walked through one of the parks that had more trees than most, cutting us off from potential eyes and ears.

It was a beautiful starry night, the moon lighting up the darkness created by the absence of the sun. Most guys would probably kill to be alone with Sarah on a night like this, the romantic ambiance which could almost be touched. But this was not the case for me. My mind had already numbed any semblance of attraction that could be had for my former friend.

Finding a small wooden bench we sat down, and I waited for what she had to say. Sarah had been the one to initiate our meeting, thus it was only right for her to be the one to start the conversation.

I kept my gaze forward, letting my eyes wander the scenery of the lush gathering of green. It was peaceful. Listening to the wind whistling, as the leaves acted like a rhythmic backing to the melody, brought my numbed emotions back a bit. In the corner of my eyes, I could see her hands shaking a bit as she finally started to reveal her thoughts.

"Miren, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for having been afraid of you after what happened with Arthur, and I am also sorry for not explaining to James that you didn't do anything last weekend in time."

Her voice started breaking the more she talked, and I could hear that she was truly in pain, but I kept my gaze away, knowing full well she was currently looking at me with tearful eyes.

"I didn't want this to happen, and I know you did not too. Do you remember? The times when we went out to drink, the times we studied together, and the times we ate together?"

I didn't give her a response, not because I couldn't, but just because it wasn't needed. We both knew that I remembered all the occasions when we had joyfully spent time together. It was painful thinking about what I had lost, but it wasn't as if I hadn't gained anything from it.

Lindsey was a friend I might not have had if not for the fact that she found us similar, outcasts who couldn't be understood by our peers, and unlike Sarah, James and Brad, she hadn't thrown me away because of how I viewed my enemies. Even after she had seen me claim the life of a man, she had stayed by my side.

However, the most important thing I acquired was perspective. The knowledge that although I might be shunned and even feared by people who I trusted, I would survive as long as I has some people who supported me.

The girl at my side finally broke down, now almost hysteric as she begged, "I know that I don't deserve to ask this of you, but please, Miren, please don't kill James! Please, Miren!"

Baffled by the stupidity of the foolish girl, my gaze ended up losing its conviction and I turned my head toward her. She held her head in her hands, wet with tears as she continued to cry desperately.

"Are you an idiot?"

"Huh?"

Because of my words, the crying girl looked up at me, not minding the tears and snot flowing downwards. It was painfully hard not to facepalm at her pleading, because of one simple reason.

"You do realize that we will wear the safety artifacts during our duel, and considering what happened before, there is no way they would let us wear them before checking that they are working. Not only that, do you truly believe that I would kill James just because I am angry at him? You truly are an idiot, Sarah."

Her mouth was wide open because of my little speech, not knowing what was happening. In the end, she ultimately reacted, "Who are you calling an idiot?! When did the cute little Miren get replaced by this rude psycho!"

Pouting, harsh words were coming out of her, but at least she wasn't crying anymore. In fact, it almost felt like the opposite, almost like she and Brad squabbled. However, there was still a distinct distance between us, a distance that would never be solved by just some playful banter.

Sighing, I felt like I had to make sure that she knew that even if we weren't friends, we weren't necessarily enemies. James was an enemy, but he had chosen to be so by his own choice.

"Haaa... So anyway, the only thing you have to worry about tomorrow is mending James's broken ego after I destroy him."

It was hard trying to toe the line between keeping it playful in an attempt to make her feel a bit more comfortable with me, while also clearly showing that we weren't playing for the same team. She was on the side of James, while I was on the side of me.

Her pouting continued, but she did seem a bit more relaxed than before, as she continued to bicker with me, "You will never, ever, ever beat James. He is a hundred times stronger than you and better looking!"

"Oh, is that so? Then why did I get ranked as the number one student and not him? Are you calling our teachers liars?"

Our squabble continued, as we kept on throwing childish retorts at each other, and before we knew it; we were smiling. After some time, we settled down again and returned to the harsh reality that we lived in.

Clasping her hands, she focused her eyes on the ground, just having one more thing to ask before we would walk separate ways. "Say, Miren..."

"Yea? What?"

"Do you think there is any possibility for us to become friends again? You know, go back to how it used to be?"

Her words were alluring, incredibly so, but it was a stupid question. A question so silly it couldn't even be called naïve. As stated before, I had thought about it. Not once or twice, but many times. The answer always remained the same, no matter how much we both wanted it to change.

But I didn't give her that answer, not for her sake, but for my sake. For that part of me that still needed to hold on to hope.

"Maybe."