Killing Vampires

Autumn had insisted that before they went to the concert, Benny needed a complete makeover.

"You're not going to perm my hair and paint my fingernails and shit like that, are you?" Benny asked jokingly.

"Perm, no. Fingernails, that's definitely a possibility."

Benny gave her a look of apprehension. She pretended not to notice and went on.

"Now, first things first, if you want to be a Manson kid, you have to dye your hair a different color. Black is always good, some go with pink, blue, or even a combination of colors."

"If I absolutely have to do it, let's go with plain old black."

"Cool!"

With that, she led him into the bathroom and sat him in a chair with his back to the sink.

Two hours later he had black hair and he had to admit he looked pretty damn good with it. While he was admiring himself in Autumn's floor-length mirror, his future wife was in the bathroom getting ready for the show. He turned to the bed and found a stack of clothes that Autumn had laid out for him, including a spiked dog collar.

"What the fuck?" he said to himself, holding the collar as if it were some slimy species of fish that had been discovered for the first time.

He heard the bathroom door open and turned to find Autumn standing in the doorway of the bedroom.

"Well, what do you think?" she asked. Her hair was now black as well, except for the bangs, which were hot pink and framed her pretty face. She was wearing a black, lacey tank top, with a skintight undershirt that had black and white stripes running down the long sleeves. Her black skirt was incredibly short and the pantyhose that covered her legs matched the black and white stripes of her sleeves.

Benny was once again left speechless but incredibly turned on. Unable to stop himself, he went to her and began to kiss her neck, while gently caressing her breasts. She gave in to him immediately and they were soon on the bed.

Slowly, he peeled the pantyhose off her legs, then off came the black lace panties.

When they had finished, Benny dressed in the black jeans and shirt that Autumn had picked up for him, he did let her paint his fingernails black, but he had to put his foot down at the dog collar.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Benny yelled.

Jack had obviously started to panic and brought the hearse up to seventy-five miles per hour. "We've got to get to Dad," he shouted back.

"Okay, you do realize we are driving a car full of illegal weapons, right? You need to slow down and enhance your fucking calm. If a cop pulls us over this little adventure of ours will come to a real quick end."

Jack seemed to take the point and began to slow the car down.

Turning his attention to Autumn, Benny said; "Is he still there?"

Autumn closed her eyes, "No, he's beginning to move away now. Jack, do you have your cell phone with you?"

"Yeah," Jack said pulling the phone from his jacket pocket. He flipped it open, accessed the phone book, and found Frank's office number and extension. After a few minutes, he snapped the flip phone shut and looked up at the other two. "There's no answer. What should we do, Benny?"

Benny thought about their options. "We stick to the plan. We go back to your house and wait for Dad to show."

"But, Benny, what if he's hurt?"

"I don't think these guys would leave anyone alive. Besides, the Old Man can take care of himself, we'd most likely just get in his way."

Jack only nodded his head in agreement and they drove the rest of the way back in silence. Benny and Jack both knew that their Father had extensive training in the Marine Corp. and his knowledge of weapons and hand-to-hand combat was vast.

"Autumn," Benny said, "can you get any kind of feel on what kind of mood the vampire was in when he left?"

"No," she responded, "all I can see is what direction he's going now. North, in case you're interested."

Benny turned in his seat and stared out the window the rest of the way home in the hopes of seeing the vampire as their paths crossed. He had to reassure himself that he was right about his father. The three of them would be too late to do anything by the time they got there anyway.

Around two in the morning they pulled into Jack's driveway, got out of the car, went inside, and sat down at the kitchen table.

The house was still and quiet save for the steady tick of the old clock Jack had in his living room. Benny had a hard time concentrating on anything but that blasted clock. He could feel the start of a headache that seemed to pulse and intensify with each tic.

Autumn sat quietly and thought about the things she was going to miss about being alive. Besides the obvious, the one thing she could never live without was chocolate milk. Man, did she love the chocolate milk. Even though she was dead, she still had no idea what was waiting for her on the other side, but she was sure that if she went to heaven, the riverbeds would be flowing with chocolate milk.

Jack had trouble staying awake. It was way past his usual bedtime and he could feel his eyelids getting heavier by the minute. He began to think (or perhaps it was a strange dream) about his job. He began to see the countless bodies he had made up and prepared for show, and how with each and every one came this great fear that they'd sit up and come after him. Moaning and groaning, trying desperately to eat some part of him. Each time he would shake that fear away and tell himself he'd been watching too many horror movies. Now here he was, sitting at his kitchen table with a dead girl and waiting for his father to get here so they could go and kill some vampires.

He was on the verge of falling into a deep sleep when he felt a chill and the hair on his neck stood up. He opened his eyes to see Benny sitting across from him with a gun pointed at his head. Time seemed to slow down. Instinctively, he jumped from his seat and he hit the floor seconds before he heard the bang of the pistol, like sudden rolling thunder breaking the calm silence of a cool summer night. He looked back and saw a man with a monstrous face fall to his knees, smoke spiraled from a hole in his forehead.

"BENNY!" he shouted, pulling his own gun from the waistband of his jeans. He put two bullets into the chest of another vampire who crept in from the hallway that led to the staircase.

Benny was on his feet and moving around the table quickly toward the dark living room where the first vampire came from. He groped blindly along the inside wall until his hand fell on the light switch. He flicked it on and discovered the living room was hiding seven more vampires, lips pulled back to reveal impressive fangs.

Jack let out a sound that was somewhere between a laugh and a moan. He waved to the vampires nervously and said to his brother; "Christ, Benny, how long have these things been here?"

Benny didn't answer, he only stared at the vampires with an expression of rage that Jack thought looked completely foreign on his brother's face.

Autumn crawled under the table to stay out of the way and a second later, Benny and Jack fired repeatedly into the living room. For a moment she couldn't turn away from the ensuing carnage. She had never seen this kind of violence before in her life and never thought her Benny would be a part of it. Her attention was suddenly caught by three vampires coming out of the hall and moving swiftly toward her husband and brother-in-law.

"LOOK OUT!" she screamed, but they couldn't hear her over the gunfire and the earsplitting shrieks coming from the dying creatures. The three newcomers were nearly on them when the back door crashed open and an Uzi spoke out in three quick bursts. Benny and Jack hit the floor at the sound of the weapon. The remaining vampires fell dead.

"Frank," Autumn said happily as she came out from beneath the table, "you're okay."

Benny and Jack picked themselves up off the floor and beheld the Old Man in the doorway like a weathered warrior. Guns and silver shrapnel grenades seemed to hang from every article of clothing.

"Come on," Frank said calmly, "we're leaving. Now!"

As they walked out of the house, Jack patted his father on the back, "Way to go, Dad. I knew you were a badass."

"Yeah, thanks Dad," Benny added with a smile.

"Frank, can we take your car?" Autumn asked.

The Old Man stopped, "All I have is my pickup truck, and we won't all fit."

"Are you serious?" Jack said, exasperated "I never realized all three of us have pickups. If anybody looked at this family from the outside they'd think we were a bunch of goddamned hillbillies."

"We'll just have to stick with the hearse," Benny stated. Frank could tell he wanted nothing more than to get the show on the road. The kid was thirsty. Aching to spill more vampire blood.

They all piled into the old death cab (Benny and Autumn climbing into the back) and hit the road. Frank took over the driving chores and as he pulled out of the driveway, he noticed Jack shivered as if he were freezing and Benny was even more pale than usual, although before now, Frank wouldn't have thought that possible.

"Are you guys okay?" he asked.

"That's the first time I've ever killed…anything," Jack said in a daze. "I've never even shot a gun before today."

"Well I tried to get you to come target shooting with Benny and me when you were younger," Frank stated, "but, you always had other things to do. You know, smoking weed isn't the only recreation life has to offer."

"Somehow, I don't think shooting at paper targets would have prepared me for slaying vampires. However, I am glad you brought up weed. I could definitely use some right about now." Jack pulled a cigarette case from the inside pocket of his jacket. He opened it and revealed six neatly rolled joints. "See, you're not the only one who's always prepared."

Frank gave him a comical smirk, and then looked through the sliding window at Benny and Autumn, "How about you two, are you doing alright?"

"I'm fine," Benny said quietly.

"Me too," Autumn added, her head resting on Benny's chest.

Frank turned his attention back to the road, "Where are we heading, Autumn?"

"North, toward Gary, when we get closer I'll be able to give you an exact location."

Jack took a deep drag off of his joint, "So, Dad, what happened at your office?" he asked through inhaled lungs.

Frank gave them all a surprised look and then remembered Autumn would have been able to tell Odin was there. He glanced back at the road, then turned to Jack and said; "Let me have that thing."

For a moment Jack seemed unsure of what the Old Man meant, but then realized he wanted the joint. After much hesitation, he handed the loopy stick (as Autumn sometimes called them) to his father.

To everyone's surprise, Frank stuck the joint between his lips and took a large hit. He held it in his lungs a moment, exhaled, and began to recount his night at the office without explaining his sudden urge for weed. "In the seven years I worked with these people, I've mostly dealt with a man named Odin Sway. Tonight, he showed up at my office with four other vampires, intent on killing me. I was able to eliminate the four goons, however, Odin is a different matter altogether.

"I'm sure you all have noticed, vampires are quicker than regular people, but still within the boundaries of physics," The others nodded to confirm. "Odin is much faster. I had a hard time even getting a bead on him and when I finally did, I missed. He can dodge bullets for Christ's sake. I had him point-blank, dead to rights, and he still managed to twist his body out of the way, while he was in midair. I pulled a second pistol and started firing where I thought he might land next. Eventually, he gave up and flew out the window."

"He can fly?" Benny said, clearly amazed by Frank's story.

"Yes, but I'm pretty sure all of them can. The thing that worries me most is that he always mentioned he had superiors. I'd hate to see the kind of power they have."

"What does he look like?" Autumn requested.

"Tall, pale, handsome, long blondish white hair, walks with a cane. Sound familiar?"

"He's the one who killed me," she replied in a hoarse voice. Frank saw Benny tense up behind her.

"That's right," Frank continued. "He admitted it to me before we fought."

"Then the other five must be his superiors," Benny added.

"That would be my guess," Frank said, "These guys are going to be tough to kill while they're awake. I think our best plan would be to get in their home while they sleep during the day and stake them in the heart."

"Sounds like a good plan to me," Benny said.

"Well, if we time it right, we should get to Gary by about sunup. We should have plenty of time to stop for a bite. Is anybody else hungry?"

Without waiting for an answer, Frank pulled into a Taco Hut drive-through. He ordered a family pack (four tacos and three burritos), two burritos without meat for Benny, and three diet drinks. Jack tried to hand a taco to Autumn.

"No thanks," she said, with a wave, "I don't need to eat anymore."

"You don't?" Benny asked as he bit into a burrito.

"No, all my beeps and whistles have stopped working," she replied pointing to her stomach, "that's what happens when you die."

"It's worse than that, I'm sorry to say." Jack knew all the gory details about preparing a body for burial. Plus, there had been an autopsy.

"I'd rather not hear about it," the dead girl said.

As Frank pulled the car back on the road, Benny reached out and shut the sliding window so he could talk to his wife in private. He only stared at her for a long moment, as he tried to find the right way to ask his question.

"What is it?" Autumn asked with some concern.

"What did it feel like? Dying, I mean."

She looked down at her lap and thought back to the night she was slain by the mysterious vampire, Odin Sway. "When I realized there was no way for me to escape from our room, I was terrified. But when I looked into his eyes, those beautiful, dead eyes, all of my fear seemed to drop away. I was calm, relaxed. I looked at his handsome, emotionless face and felt completely at ease. Then he cut my throat and everything went black." She looked up at Benny as if she had just come out of a trance, "The next thing I remember is being in the coffin. It was almost as if I'd just woke up from a deep sleep."

"Were you scared?"

"No. I knew I was already dead and in no danger of suffocating. I tore through the coffin and dug my way out of the grave, which is where that superhuman strength comes into play I guess."

"Do you still have this strength?"

"I don't think so. As a matter of fact, I'm starting to feel weaker with each passing hour."

"Are you sure we have as long as a week?"

"No, I'm not sure."

Benny let out a defeated sigh.

"Now let me ask you a question," Autumn said.

"Okay."

"Will you be able to make love to me again, knowing it would be with a dead woman?"

Benny looked away from her, "I, um-"

They were suddenly interrupted by a rapid knock on the sliding window. Benny pulled it aside.

Frank looked through. "You two need to be in on this."