Chapter 65

"Orochimaru is a problem," Tobi growled, standing before the true form of the man who referred to himself as 'Pain' itself, "This needs to be resolved Nagato. Nothing productive will come of that man doing as he pleases."

The two of them looked out over the eternally rainy village of Amegakure. It was congested as far as living space went, but no one wanted to live too far away from the center of the village. It was a holdout reaction to the days when war would rage all throughout the country, even as close as the outlying settlements near the hidden village itself.

The man with whom Tobi spoke seemed wholly unconcerned with the weather. His spiky orange hair matted down on his head as rain dripped down past his death-pale skin riddled with piercings. His odd, purple ring-patterned eyes stared out, surveying his recently won domain.

"The more time he has with the Sanbi, the more he'll adjust to its power. I agree," Nagato/Pain said to his masked benefactor, "It isn't as if we have an abundance of choices as to who will take him on either. You and I both know that it will be me."

Well that certainly solved the issue of talking Nagato into taking some sort of proactive action against Orochimaru.

"How are you feeling?" Tobi asked. He hadn't been present for it, but he did know that Nagato had recently deposed the leader of Amegakure. Hanzo was dead, and there was always a chance that Nagato was still reeling from a potentially harsh fight.

As expected, even if there had been something wrong with him, Nagato would never let it show, least of all through one of his Six Paths.

"I'm fine," Nagato said through his Deva Path, "Shall we begin extracting the Nibi then? With Sasori's death it may take longer than before. We can worry about dealing with problems such as Orochimaru after we've finished more pressing business. You can find him, can't you?"

"He was never as difficult to locate as he thought he was," Tobi said, "And I have a feeling he's becoming bolder than he is careful these days."

XxX

(Sunagakure no Sato)

Having provided the bit of intel to Konoha that Akatsuki was moving through their countryside, Suna was also well aware of who had entered the borders of Kaze no Kuni in order to deal with them. It wasn't a matter that the Kazekage planned to directly get his forces involved with. There was no benefit to Suna fighting to protect Kumo's jinchuuriki, but if Konoha wanted to waste resources for another nation's weapon that was their prerogative.

If they couldn't hold onto what was theirs against a group of nine-, no, eight shinobi, they clearly didn't need to have that sort of power, did they?

Standing on the roof of his building, the Kazekage shut his eyes and felt the shifting of the wind. Another windstorm was either on the way, or was happening somewhere else in the country already. If he had to guess he would have said farther north.

One of his ninja appeared behind him in a Shunshin, set in a kneeling bow. He wore the common outfit of a Sunagakure ninja, turban and all, only it covered half of his face. Only the right side was visible, with two red markings traveling horizontally across it.

The Kazekage turned his head just enough to note which one of his ninja had come to him, "Baki," He greeted.

"Kazekage-sama," The turban-clad shinobi said, "The Konoha group has been spotted in the desert. Four of them, but their attire makes them hard to identify. They also have at least two sensors in their party, so we can't risk sending anyone close enough to them to confirm who they are."

"They're not going to send anyone else if they don't send either Hatake Kakashi or Uchiha Sasuke," The Kazekage said without a shred of doubt in his voice.

"Why do you say that?" Baki asked his leader. It seemed sound, but it was quite the risk to pit either of those kinds of resources against criminals recorded as able to conquer entire nations single-handedly.

The Kazekage turned to Baki. This particular jounin was one of Suna's most intelligent higher-ups, and the man he trusted the development of his children to. He had not been let down in that regard once over the years, "Since the power of the Senju Clan has gone the way of the dinosaur, the safest bet to fight against a fully matured Sharingan is another fully matured Sharingan."

And Konoha only had two others to choose from; Kakashi or Sasuke.

Turning around, the Kazekage had another point to cover, "You said they needed to confirm who they were. Does that mean they've already speculated who they are?"

"One could be Uzumaki Naruto. The Kyuubi jinchuuriki."

There was no 'could be' about it. You didn't make that sort of assumption if there wasn't a great possibility of it being truth. That was a dangerous sort of conjecture to have and be unfounded.

Immediately a decision was made.

"Gaara is not to be informed of this," The Kazekage said with the utmost seriousness in his voice, "I mean it. If he catches wind of either Uchiha or Uzumaki being anywhere near this area, he will go after them in order to engage."

Gaara was much better than he used to be, but he still had hints of loose cannon left in him. The fact that he was shaping up to be the strongest ninja that the village had ever seen was one thing. But he still had his lapses in judgment and what he wanted could at times override what was better for more than just him at times in his mind.

"So what do you want us to do?"

The Kazekage let out a sigh. If this didn't go absolutely right, it was going to do irreparable damage to their alliance with Konoha. An alliance they no longer needed in order to function and had always resented to begin with. Many of the ninjas and even the council of advisors had at different times expressed their displeasure with what their village had to do to keep afloat.

But now that the Wind Daimyo had been replaced with a new leader in recent years, the times of hardship were over. Suna was flourishing thanks to a feudal lord that was willing to take his business to domestic mercenaries, as well as because of past assistance from Konoha, but it was time to cast off the stigma presented by the latter.

"We still have our teams watching the northern border," The leader of Suna said to Baki, "Have them move a platoon into position."

Akatsuki, Konoha's jinchuuriki, and Kumo's two jinchuuriki, all in one place intertwined in what was sure to be a severe battle. Three birds, one stone.

How could any enterprising military-based government turn down such an invitation?

XxX

(Deserts of Northern Kaze no Kuni)

Kaze no Kuni and its series of seasonal wind storms were growing increasingly aggravating to deal with. Granted, they had been fortunate enough to avoid having to travel at night when the wind was at its worst, but it constantly felt like the tents they'd set up for rest would blow away despite being secured to the ground as best as they could.

Sitting inside and checking over his equipment as Shikamaru simply lazed around on his sleeping roll, Neji couldn't keep the scowl off of his face any longer, "The five of us against a man able to wipe out an entire clan in one night and the 'Monster of the Mist'."

"Don't tell me you like those odds," Shikamaru said.

Neji gave him a look as if to ask him if he were kidding or not, but Shikamaru kept his eyes closed, preventing him from seeing it, "I wouldn't know. The only thing I know firsthand from facing them comes from both you and Naruto," And he hadn't been content with what he'd heard, "Why are we doing this?"

He wasn't the type to go against his orders, but he was entirely willing to question the validity of them.

The fact of the matter was, there was no love lost for Neji as far as Kumogakure went, and not only was he traveling with the brother of the Raikage, who had sent out the order that wound up with his father dying as a method of appeasement, he was doing for something that would benefit the very village that they came from.

Shikamaru shrugged his shoulders, "Think of it as fostering peace and camaraderie across international borders," He said sarcastically.

"And why exactly do you think I would care about fostering any sort of camaraderie with them?" Neji replied. Forgiving his family who were legitimately sorrowful over what had happened was one thing, but forgiving the people that had been the cause of his life's greatest tragedy and had never issued the slightest apology or even acknowledged their responsibility despite the fact that every shinobi village on the continent knew it?

That wasn't so simple.

"Okay, consider it a way to smooth things over after what Naruto did,"

Neji narrowed his eyes at such a thing being brought up, "Kumogakure didn't feel the need to smooth anything over after what they tried with the Hyuuga Clan, so why does Hokage-sama feel the need to appease them with this?"

"Because it's not appeasing them," Shikamaru said bluntly, "Akatsuki getting the Nibi out of Yugito-san wouldn't be good for anyone," He drawled, "It's just that if we save her and make sure she returns safe and sound, no one will be able to bitch about what Naruto did to the Raikage's right-hand man."

"-Which he was entirely within his rights to do in the first place in order to defend himself and the members of his squad."

Yes, the way it sounded didn't pass the smell test. It looked like Konoha was apologizing for the actions of one of its soldiers for doing what soldiers were supposed to do in an obvious situation. The only reason it was controversial was because of who Darui was as the Raikage's number one underling, and because Naruto was a jinchuurki.

Shikamaru knew this, but he also had seen far more egregious displays of such a thing in the Fire Court, "Politics don't have to make sense or be fair Neji. It's circumstantial. Kumo's been chomping at the bit for a fight since they started bolstering their military, and Suna obviously isn't feeling the need to live up to the whole 'ally' portion of our agreement."

That much had been blatant over the years. Suna had a chip on its shoulder because of their daimyo cutting their funding and sending his more lucrative business to Konoha. In a show of good faith, Konoha tended to outsource the work back to them to keep things civil.

It had apparently been their cue to become petulant. As Suna recovered more and more economically they didn't particularly return any sort of neighborly favor and the treaty simply devolved into the two villages tolerating one another. They were allies in name only, as Suna hadn't once provided Konoha assistance upon request.

And here again, they weren't helping, even though they had to know of Akatsuki by then. What they were after. What that could mean if they got enough of what they were looking for.

Back in front of the Hokage, Naruto had been right. Why the hell did they have to be the ones that always fought the stupidly strong S-rank criminals?

"Either way," Neji figured, listening to the wind howl outside of the tent, "Tomorrow we should be entering the enemy's territory, at least according to Uchiha-san. Do you think we can defeat them?"

"Yes," Shikamaru said without a moment of hesitation. And he left it at that. A matter of moments later the two were asleep. There wasn't any time to waste worrying about tomorrow.

XxX

(The Next Day – Konohagakure no Sato)

"Halt. What's your business in Konoha?"

A young man barely in his twenties, with brown hair containing a white streak led the pack of three that were being questioned. He wore a pair of sunglasses, full black monk's robes, and a white sash around his waist with the kanji for fire emblazoned on it.

Most of all, he was very surprised, because these were the same voices he heard the last time he had ventured to Konoha's gate.

"Wow… you guys are still here," Sadao said in an earnestly stunned manner, much to the confusion of Kotetsu and Izumo, "You don't remember? You were the ones that were standing right there, asking that same question the last time we came here. That was four years ago."

The two chunin who seemed to land guard duty with more frequency than any other twosome in the village only felt their stock in the village hierarchy drop further with that frank statement, "Ugh," Both of them groaned simultaneously as if they both absorbed body blows. Kotetsu was the first to recover, "Right. Well I can't go off of past meetings for this sort of thing, so could you just tell me for the ledger."

Sadao nodded and gestured to the woman with him sporting curly dark hair in a high ponytail, a dazzling autumn-colored kimono that seemed more at home on a noble's body than a ninja's. He then gestured to an angry-looking young man with neck-length dark hair, monk-in-training robes, and his right arm covered in a brace lined with seals that traveled from his elbow under his sleeve to the base of his fingers.

"Sadao, Suzukuro Kotoko, and Sora of the Guardian Ninja," The leader of the trio, and the overall group, said to identify themselves. Sora scowled and Kotoko just waved cheerfully, eyes entirely closed.

"And your business?" Izumo asked, actually remembering two of the three the last time they had come.

"To visit our lovely juniors who are no longer with us!" Kotoko exclaimed chirpily, "Shika and Naruto had to go home when their contracts expired, but we've come ever so far to see them and catch up," At that her eyes opened in a vicious grin, "And make sure Naruto hasn't lost his mind and ripped an entire town's worth of people apart the way he almost did back-."

Sadao abruptly cleared his throat and Sora looked as if he were about to cut a string on the shamisen she kept on her back to make her shut up.

"Oh! A completely isolated incident from almost two years ago," Kotoko amended with a wave and a delicate laugh that belied the violent anticipation she'd shown just a moment ago, "It was mostly Jiraiya-sama's fault. I don't think Naruto's particular seal is the type anyone else but him is supposed to try and open, and I don't think you can really 'loosen' it either, but oh, I'm rambling!"

Kotetsu and Izumo both looked at each other and then back to the visitors, "Riiiiight," They weren't particularly afraid. If finding out Iruka was dead and then confronting the person who did it and spied on the village under the guise of a friend for years didn't set him off into another freak-out, they figured things were well enough in hand, "We haven't heard of anything like that happening. He's been back for almost six months."

"What about the news flying around that he obliterated a fishing village and killed two of the Raikage's best ninja," Sora asked bluntly, tapping his fingers on the braces covering his right arm. It was Naruto that kept the more awful parts of himself from being a danger to others, and even because of him that he'd found a place willing to bring him in. As callous as he was, he did want to make sure everything was okay, "It's confirmed."

Kotetsu and Izumo saw it as the watchmen from the capital looking in on one of Konoha's big hitters. Well to the two of them Naruto was a Konoha ninja. He was a good kid. One of them. And with that in mind they synchronized thought processes for a wonderful fifteen seconds.

"Well that was on a mission-."

"-And he had complete control the entire time-."

"-And that fishing village was long abandoned-."

"-And those two guys really had it coming."

"It was more like one guy really."

"Yeah, he just straight-up killed the other one. No Kyuubi involved."

It was proof positive that those two had been doing this particular job together for far too long to be healthy for normal social development.

Kotetsu punched Izumo in the arm after the last remark only to get a glare in return. What was the big deal? They were ninjas. They killed people all of the time. Well, the ones that actually went out on real missions instead of guarding the gates and other areas in the village did at least.

"Anyway," Sadao said, getting things back on track, "You should have some kind of communication about it. He should know that we were sent this way. The daimyo sent him word just as we set out," Izumo nodded and headed back to the guard post to check the notices left for their shift.

Kotetsu entertained himself in the meantime by wondering if Kotoko's crazy was more deciding of a force than how pretty she was. If it wasn't he might have contemplated hitting on her.

"These are the people guarding the gates?" Sora grumbled, seeing them as a rather soft lot. He wondered just how Konoha had its reputation as the strongest village in the past. It was no wonder to him that Kumo was taking over that particular spot ever since the build-up of their military forces.

Sadao rolled his eyes behind his glasses, "Yes, these are the people guarding the gates. Because 80% of the people coming through the gates are civvies and you don't want to scare the people that pay you," He said before expanding on his statement, "These guys are like, 'Welcome to Konoha,' and then you go inside and if they think you're trouble that's when you see the people you're not supposed to mess with."

"I guess that's my cue."

With that, Kakashi appeared in a puff of smoke, crouched on the roof of the guard post with a lazy wave for the visitors. Sora scowled, and Sadao just grinned over at the newest Guardian team member. Yes, that certainly counted as the 'don't do anything stupid in our village' warning. Guardians or not, you didn't just decide out of the blue to tangle with Hatake Kakashi.

"Hello~!" Kakashi said with his visible eye crinkled in mirth, "I'll be your escort to the Hokage today."

"Why you?"

"Eh, because I'm bored, and I don't see how Gai could try and turn this into a challenge if he finds me," That admission by itself stunned Sora. He was escorting/keeping watch over them, three of the Fire Daimyo's personal bodyguards/hitmen, because he was bored?

Getting a thumbs up from Izumo in the post, Kotetsu turned back to the three Guardians with a wry smile, "Welcome to Konoha," He said, laughing inwardly at the scowl on Sora's face, "By the way, you are far from the scariest person I've had to let through the gate just this month."

XxX

(Northern Kaze no Kuni – Sora-ku)

The desolate city once meant to be a shining beacon of prosperity in a harsh landscape was so still and so quiet. It was like a tomb. The only thing stirring the silence of that tomb to progress was the howl of the tearing wind through the empty streets and alleys.

Streets that had existed back during the height of the city were covered oppressively with sand that blocked entire doorways into buildings. Walls were cracked and crumbled away, blasted by the constant harsh nature of the climate.

The team from Konoha stood atop a rooftop a short way into the town that let them look back around to the vast desert and the godforsaken city. They were so far out of their own neck of the woods that it wasn't even a joke. They hadn't seen a tree or grass in a day and a half.

"Alright, let's do this," Naruto held his hand out, expecting the others to put theirs in as well, "Hands in for good luck," Killer B threw his hand in without hesitation. No one else did. It was rather disheartening, "Guys, come on. This is important."

Shikamaru rolled his eyes and threw his in as well. As long as it shut Naruto up and got them moving sooner he'd take the hit to his pride.

Sasuke immediately turned his back on the display altogether and headed off in his own direction to start handling business. The plan was to split off into pairs anyway. Worst case scenario they would end up matched against Itachi and Kisame two-on-two. Best case scenario it would be two-on-one against one of the criminals.

Shikamaru muttered a curse and followed after him before all hell broke loose without anyone watching his back.

"Remember the plans in case you find any of them!" Shikamaru said before leaving the rest of them.

Killer B seemed too antsy to remain still and shouted into the air over the howl of the growing sandstorm, "Akatsuki better watch their back, I'm comin' to get my kitty cat!" And he began his life-or-death game of hide-and-seek, splitting off to try and cover more ground to find Yugito.

If Killer B was the one who found them first, the noise and chaos he would raise would quickly alert the others to the location, and he would more than be able to survive in time for help to arrive.

With that bit done, Naruto let the frivolity fade and turned to Neji who had his Byakugan active. His attention wasn't focused on the dead city of Sora-ku however, it was directed to the outside of the area, "What's the matter?"

Neji narrowed his eyes suspiciously, "It would be better for all of us if I just left it unsaid," With his field of vision he could see that Naruto wasn't going to let it go however, and he knew it, causing him to relent with a sigh, "Sunagakure has dispatched a unit. To this point, I've counted up to seventeen dispatched thus far concealed in the desert storm."

That should have been good news. More bodies to search meant an easier time and an easier battle once it inevitably began. Only, Neji said they were concealed, hiding.

They weren't coming any further, and Naruto knew it, "They're not gonna help, are they?" He asked in a hard voice.

"You and I both know the answer to that," Neji said, unable to hide the disgust in his voice despite his best efforts. Politics made him sick. Perhaps that was why he would probably never progress much further in his career than he'd already reached, "They would let these madmen slit this world's throat if they figured the rest of us would go down with them as well."

"Well," Naruto said, flipping a new pair of goggles down over his eyes before producing another set for Neji, "I guess I wouldn't want to have to break this much of a sweat just for a first round knockout anyway, right? As long as they're not coming after us, I don't give that much of a fuck."

Neji gratefully put them on in order to protect his very important doujutsu. They weren't prepared the way Naruto's were, but they were vital equipment in this weather. Clearly Naruto had been prepared to provide for the team he'd been saddled with. Had Sasuke not been in such a hurry, Neji wouldn't have doubted that he would have received a pair as well.

"I don't like this."

"Neither do I, but we're in now," Naruto said with a shrug, despite the feeling in the pit of his stomach. He had to ignore it. He had to. It wasn't like they could turn and run away. Even if they did, he wasn't sure they would get very far depending on what the Suna ninjas were really there for, "Might as well finish the job."

Neji nodded and began leading the way through the dusty streets of Sora-ku, "I feel that getting out will be what we'll have to be concerned with later."

There was a good chance that the ninjas outside had standing orders to keep anyone from leaving at all.

"We'll be fine," Naruto assured him, "You'll be back in Konoha, grumping around and dealing with Gai and Lee in no time."

"If that's the kind of fate I can expect upon surviving, I might as well ask them to kill me."

XxX

It didn't take long for Shikamaru to catch up to Sasuke, finding that he'd lowered his position to the sand-covered street, his eyes closed as if he were trying to think of or remember something, "Hey," Shikamaru said to him after landing in a cloud of dust behind him, "Don't do that. I don't care how hot to get to your brother you are, if you get anyone killed-."

"I've got it," Sasuke said, eventually opening his eyes and wincing at the wind kicking up sand around them. Even covered by the gigantic walls of the buildings around them, it was still quite gusty. He reached out and caught a pair of goggles thrown to him by Shikamaru who also had on a pair, "Who brought these?"

"Who else actually wears any?" Shikamaru asked, "They're not prepared to help fend off optical genjutsu like Naruto's are though."

Sasuke frowned deeper than normal despite his relief at not having to squint just to walk around and see, "If they're not, you shouldn't fight when we find Itachi."

Shikamaru instinctually wanted to say that Sasuke didn't have to tell him twice, but a need to know what he was walking into made him say something else instead, "Why not? I know you probably want to handle that bit of family business alone, but that doesn't seem very smart to me."

It wasn't about being smart. It was about keeping people that shouldn't have been involved alive when the entire thing blew sky-high.

What Sasuke said next, he said from experience, "Whatever genjutsu Itachi wound up putting on Naruto wasn't even close to being his strongest one," He knew that for a fact. If it had been, Naruto wouldn't have come back anywhere near as healthy as he had been, "Whatever you do, don't look into his eyes. If you do you'll never be alright again."

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow. Did that not apply to Sasuke as well? As far as Shikamaru knew, the most infamous portion of the Uchiha Clan's gameplan was to get an opponent to look them in the eye, and if Itachi's genjutsu was better that kind of cut out an entire facet of his would-be gameplan that he'd probably been prepared from early childhood to utilize, "And what about you?"

"I've been waiting for this for half of my life," Sasuke said, leading on, "It's not going to end the way it did the first time."

"Do you know where he is already or something?"

"No, but I know where he won't go, and I know someone who can help find him. Come with me."

He seemed entirely certain of what he was saying, and that gave Shikamaru pause. There was someone there other than them and Akatsuki? Someone that could help him find Itachi? And he knew about it in advance? What the hell did that even mean anyway? Sora-ku was deserted.

Smelling a rat, Shikamaru immediately bound Sasuke in place with his shadow, keeping him from moving another step. Sasuke couldn't even turn around to confront him over it. He was frozen in place. Of course, Shikamaru didn't need to even look him in the eyes to know that he was pissed.

That didn't concern him. If he were honest, Shikamaru was just shy of being quite miffed himself.

The sound of Sasuke's voice was sharp enough to cut steel, "What are you doing?"

Shikamaru didn't flinch and held his fingers in hand-seal of his signature move, "You're not telling us something. I'm wagering you're not telling us a lot actually."

He reacted too oddly when he'd been informed of the area in which Akatsuki had been guessed to be traveling to.

There was something about this city. There had to be. It was too convenient that Sasuke even knew about Sora-ku at all. It wasn't exactly a landmark passed down in the annals of Konoha's history. It was more of a cenotaph to Suna-Iwa's history if it was anything.

And now he was saying that there was someone there who could help them find the bad guys? It would have been irresponsible not to call him out at that point.

"I don't care about any of that though," Shikamaru continued, "You're spoiling for a one-on-one with Itachi, but there's a time and a place for settling your scores. The middle of a mission where the primary objective isn't to kill him isn't it."

"What would you know about-!?"

"I don't know about whatever you're probably going to say," Shikamaru cut him off without even willing to hear whatever tirade he was about to go into, "But you know what I do know about? Making sure everyone gets home in one fucking piece. So I'll just say it right now. If anything you're going to do, or anything you're not telling us gets somebody killed, you'd better hope that it's me."

Sasuke hadn't planned on any of his teammates dying. He wasn't going to let them if he could help it. Not for what was supposed to be his fight to begin with. But he was being put on the spot and being threatened, of which he was no fan, "And if it is you?"

He felt control return to his body and turned around to face Shikamaru who walked past him and farther along into the city, not even bothering to turn toward him as he did, "Then you're going to wish it was Naruto instead."

Sasuke stared at his back for a spell before tossing his hair out from in front of his lenses and moving along, "Hm."

XxX

(With Naruto)

Normally on a team with two sensors that were searching for something, the sensors would split up to more effectively cover ground. This wasn't a normal case though.

In the kind of setting where the Konoha team found themselves, Naruto's sensor jutsu was next to useless. There were too many walls. His chakra pulse could work through one, but in an empty city it wasn't particularly effective.

"Nothing Neji?" Naruto asked as they kept combing Sora-ku. The entire place gave him the creeps. It was the closest thing to a ghost town he'd ever seen. The spirits of wars past and the people whose lives had failed there felt like they covered every empty window or open doorway with a torn curtain swinging in the wind.

"No people yet," Neji said, his covered eyes able to see right through every aspect of the goggles and through the buildings because of the Byakugan, "But I see cats. Many cats."

Finding stray animals in large numbers wasn't an odd thing for an abandoned city.

For instance, it was a well-known fact that packs of wild stray dogs that controlled most of the major cities in Tsuki no Kuni.

…Finding stray animals was odd for an abandoned city in the desert though.

Especially stray animals that all seemed to be doing something one thing in unison; watching them.

Neji opened his mouth to say something, but Naruto shook his head, not needing to hear it. His sensor ability might have been stanched by the walls around them, but he could still feel just behind them and without looking he could tell that the cats were looking at them from the shadows. All dead silent.

From the windows, in the alleys, through holes in gates and walls. Cats. Hundreds of average cats. At least, he would have counted them as normal if they weren't doing their level best impression of The Birds just before attacking.

Why did he know what that was? Damn Ino, making him take her to that weird movie. It had been before they were actually together as well, so he didn't even get to make out with her during it. No, he just got to watch hordes of birds kill people and he thusly gained a new thing to have nightmares over. Thank goodness he could turn wind into a deadly weapon, because-.

"Naruto! Focus up!"

Naruto snapped out of his musing when he head Neji snap at him to get his attention, "What? What's the matter?"

His answer came with another release of his own chakra pulse. At the end of the street they had been walking on, it opened up into a town square sort of area. Perched on seemingly every ledge and line hanging in the air was a crow.

There were hundreds of them, all around, looking right at them.

This was just like that stupid movie.

"Uh…" Naruto started to say, slowly moving his hands to make a hand-seal just in case, as if a sudden movement would bring them all down on them, "This ain't a genjutsu."

"I'm aware of that," Neji noted their movement first, as hundreds of wings began to beat and bring the masses of avian down upon them. The two of them moved away from each other to a safe distance. Not from the birds, but so that their separate defensive measures didn't interfere with each other, "But it does not change the fact that they are on every major interchange from here on out. Hakkeshou Kaiten (Eight Trigrams Palms Revolving Heaven)!"

"Fuumon no Jutsu (Wind Ripple Jutsu)!"

As Neji spun rapidly, chakra flew from his body in a dome. Naruto in turn released a single booming pulse of wind chakra that flew out from his own in every direction. The techniques from both boys sent the birds flying long enough for them to clear a path through the courtyard.

They wasted no time sprinting for that path and making for the nearest narrow alleyway.

"This shit is for the birds Neji!" Naruto shouted, covering up his face as he and Neji ran through a storm of feathers and plumage, "Heh, get it? For the birds? You know, because we're getting attacked by-."

"I understand, Naruto-san," Neji said in a terse voice as he focused on pegging the birds out of the air with palm and finger strikes when the ventured too close for his tastes. They really needed to shake those stupid things and get on with the mission.

"Hey, you remember that weird game you used to play? The counting birds thing?"

"That was training, not a game. And no, I'm not going to try and count them."

Naruto couldn't help but feel let down. Situation aside, he really wanted a concrete number of how many of the grimy crow bastards were trying to peck their eyes out. Unfortunately for the vermin-covered avian, they were wearing protective eyewear. Naruto had ensured that they'd come prepared. If ninjas had Boy Scouts, Naruto would have gotten a damn merit badge for his foresight.

…Actually, shinobi and kunoichi training in the Academy basically were Boy and Girl Scouts, only they actually wound up using the things they were taught to do later in life… to fool and kill people… for money and other miscellaneous odds and ends.

With a quick sleight of hand, Naruto grabbed Neji and forced both of them to kick up a massive cloud of sand around the two of them at an intersection, allowing the two of them to split off in an attempt to fool the birds. It did nothing though, as they were smart enough to halve their numbers and continue to pursue the pair.

Hiding just inside of the doorway of one of the copious buildings they'd passed, both Naruto and Neji waited in dead silence as the crows passed them all by, to the last one.

After the last sound of cawing and wings beating left the range of their hearing, the two of them breathed a sigh of relief. Neji gave Naruto a nod of acknowledgment at replacing the two of them with clones so quickly and Henging one of them to look like Neji to fool the stupid crows.

"Stupid rats with wings," Naruto said, head raised in triumph.

Neji just shook his head and continued scanning the area for any more trouble, "That designation is for pigeons," He said, before stiffening and turning to face straight ahead of them in the dark of the building.

"Indeed it is," A familiar dry tone said that caused the hair on Naruto's neck to stand up, "Hello again, Naruto-kun."

In the shadows, red eyes stared at the two of them, but neither of them were affected by whatever genjutsu his eye contact would have wrought on its own for their own reasons.

Without even needing to speak in order to coordinate, Neji moved to Itachi's flank and set upon him with the open-handed strikes that were the bread-and-butter of his fighting style. He might as well have been wading through gelatin however with the way that Itachi perceived and avoided his movements.

His taijutsu was so dangerous that Itachi had to pay attention to him. One touch could mean getting his chakra knocked out of whack, or death entirely depending on where the blow landed. But Neji had never been counting on actually hitting him.

All he needed to do was cause him to make a move that left him vulnerable. It took all of fifteen seconds of attack for that opening to present itself, in a blinding flurry of hands and Itachi's deft dodging abilities that carried them all over the room.

Itachi was faster than Naruto and Neji both, but he was in extremely tight quarters and they had been coming at him as hard as they could from the very beginning. It was just that Naruto let Neji get to him first.

The punch from Naruto sent Itachi clear through the ceiling to the next floor. Immediately grabbing his collar, there was no opening for Itachi to dodge the follow-up Rasengan that put him straight through the back wall, and every wall that led back out to another street.

Naruto and Neji stood at the last hole that Naruto had caused with his fist and his signature attack hitting a human being, "You started with a Rasengan?" All of the things Naruto could do that Neji knew he was capable of, and he went to the tried and true standard two. In the end, he figured it was better than him risking cutting Neji up with wind or burning him with ash, "…Well, when all you have is a hammer I suppose..." Neji wondered aloud.

It was probably the most controlled destructive attack he could use.

Opponent above you? Rasengan the skies! Opponent dodging? Rasenrengan, because two is better than one! Need to bust down a door? Rasengan! Need to clear rubble? Why Rasengan, of course!

Naruto rolled his eyes, "You don't really need a thousand techniques like Kakashi-sensei or Hokage-jiji. You just need enough. If you fight somebody, you're probably only gonna fight 'em once… because one of you are probably gonna die. So if I have one move I can do perfectly… why wouldn't it be my go-to?"

Itachi's body dispersed into crows before it even hit the ground outside from its second story fall. The birds flew away into the sandstorm-swept streets, cawing frantically, leaving no trace of Naruto and Neji's previously deadly opponent.

"Oh, that is absolute bullshit!" Naruto snapped, "He can make his clones without even being there for it!" It had definitely been a clone technique. Naruto had killed and seen enough of his own clones die in combat to know when he was facing down a solid clone jutsu, therefore making that what it was.

…Unless Uchiha Itachi's body was entirely composed of crows, which did not seem physically possible.

"My apologies," Neji said to Naruto afterwards, "I could see it wasn't the real Itachi, but it was a solid clone of Uchiha Itachi."

Everything had happened so fast though, it wasn't like there had been time to say anything, and it wasn't like it mattered in the end anyway.

And so he attacked it like it had really been Itachi, because you just didn't play around with anything having to do with that particular man. Both of them were well aware of that little nugget of information. Sure, they might have wasted a strategy of attack on a clone, but Itachi didn't get the information from his Crow Clones after they dispelled the way that Naruto did.

Naruto gave him a pat on the shoulder. Neji had done the right thing as far as he could see. If they hadn't fought to win then and there, that clone would have sidetracked them for far too long. They wouldn't have been able to capture and interrogate it, "Don't worry about it. Must mean we're getting closer."

Between the crow sentries and the Crow Clone, it definitely meant something.

XxX

(Elsewhere in Sora-ku)

"We have company," Itachi said to the hologram of the other Akatsuki members, "They will find our location before we finish the extraction."

"Oh for fuck's sake!" Hidan snapped over the connection he shared with the others, "If you have to stop and break the jutsu to go fight, that just means we'll have to start all over again from the goddamn beginning!"

The silver-haired killer was bored. They'd been sitting there for days as it stood already, and now the process of removing a biju from a jinchuuriki took even longer than the previous three days since Orochimaru had killed Sasori and taken his ring away.

Pain stifled Hidan with nothing more than a glance, despite being nothing more than a chakra hologram, "Be silent Hidan," He said sternly before addressing both Itachi and Kisame, "Do you know who plans to move on your location?"

"I do not," Itachi said, holding his concentration for the extraction jutsu, "I simply know that they are present. They disturbed my crow summons and I believe they defeated my clone."

The extraction would take another full day at least. This was not good news.

Silence reigned from the members of the organization. The only sound happened to be that of Yugito being drained of her biju and her very life's essence by a blue mass of chakra surrounding and writhing around her body, taking the Nibi straight from her eyes and mouth. She hadn't stopped screaming for three days.

They had been at it and were in the last quarter of the procedure, but the enemy would locate them before they finished. Sora-ku wasn't large enough to stop them for long. There were no human beings in Itachi and Kisame's vicinity for Pain to use for his Shapeshifting Techinque to make a decoy to sidetrack the enemy.

A decision had to be made.

Shutting his eyes, as if in quiet resignation, Pain opened them once again to address Kisame and Itachi, "Can you escape with the jinchuuriki's body?"

"I'm not entirely certain it will be a clean exit," Itachi admitted, "We were able to get here because the residents of the city are unaware that the biju we plan to extract is the Nibi," He spared a glance to the well-fortified entrance of their hiding place. Were it not for Yugito's cries of pain he was certain he would be hearing countless yowls of ninja felines at the barrier outside, "I'm quite certain they know we have its jinchuuriki now."

Kisame just laughed, "I'm pretty sure I can cut our way through a bunch of stupid cats if I have to," He said.

"I'm not saying that you can't," Itachi said, "But the commotion it would raise would bring those looking to take Yugito-san out of our hands."

"They're cats," In other words, not nearly as inherently dangerous as his sharks, even as far as being ninja animals went.

"…" Itachi didn't say anything at first, simply staring at him harshly for several seconds before opening his mouth, "Dogs, weasels, clams, toads, slugs, owls, turtles. Do I really need to go on?"

"…No, I think I've got it."

Being scolded by Uchiha Itachi. It was quite the experience to say the least.

XxX

(Konohagakure no Sato)

It was to be a mutual debriefing of Naruto's past Kyuubi episodes, approved by both the Hokage and the Daimyo (and insisted upon by advisors of the latter after Naruto almost took an entire town off of the map while serving as a Guardian). The track record of Naruto's progress in his jinchuuriki development was also to be shared.

Just in case another Kyuubi jinchuuriki was to be made, the next time they would have something resembling a gameplan or a curriculum as it went in trying to prepare them. This approach would cut down on all of the headaches that had come, and continued to come, with training the one they already had.

And so Naruto's two old squad leaders were stuck walking with one another to the meeting of those who had interacted most with the current Kyuubi jinchuuriki over the course of his development.

Well… this was awkward.

"So…"

"Hmm…"

For once, Asuma didn't know where to start with a conversation, "So what's with that girl you work with? She looked like she was counting how many of us she could kill before someone finally got her."

Sora and Kotoko were elsewhere, taking in what there was to see of Konoha. Normally that would have been cause for alarm, leaving Kotoko alone in a place filled with potentially hapless victims, but Sora was with her, and his grumpy nose-to-the-grind mentality would cut down on any homicidal tendencies.

"She's kind of unbalanced. The only thing you can really count on out of her is that she'll perform any mission she's given," Sadao said, "Other than that… well…" All he could do was shrug. How else could he explain the periodic attempts Kotoko made on everyone else's life, and how it was allowed by their handler and by the Daimyo himself.

Asuma didn't need any explanation on why, "She's something of the contingency plan isn't she?" He asked rhetorically, "To keep something like another upheaval from happening," It's the only explanation for keeping a 'mad dog' element around a tightly woven fighting force.

Sadao actually stopped in the hall and spared Asuma a glance before recognizing who he was talking to. The man was no fool. And he'd been there in person for the incident that led to the Twelve Guardian Ninja organization losing the confidence of the Fire Daimyo for an entire decade. They were just beginning to build back to something resembling their former glory.

Naruto and Shikamaru had a lot to do with that while they had been there. They'd actually gotten their numbers back up to eight out of twelve for a while.

"It's been a long time since you were a Guardian," Sadao said to Asuma, remembering that the man had been one of his heroes when he'd been a kid looking to get the same spot Asuma used to have, "After that little coup that half of them tried back when you were one of us, a lot of us don't really get face-time with the Fire Daimyo anymore. Naruto did though, and he did really early into his run."

And there were a handful of factors that played into that, aside from the fact that Naruto's antics amused the airheaded noble enough that he wanted to keep the boy around.

Asuma shrugged with a smirk on his face, "Naruto was an approved Guardian, son of the Yondaime Hokage, trained by Jiraiya-sama and one of the few surviving Guardians, and known almost everywhere on-sight as the Kyuubi jinchuuriki," In other words, his pedigree was ridiculous, and even as a thirteen year old kid he backed it up on the battlefield for his age.

For everything about the Daimyo as far as common sense went by most people's standards, the man knows his politics and how to play the game so to speak. Asuma was quite certain that he recognized Naruto was probably the front-runner for the strongest of the next generation that Hi no Kuni could produce. He'd done top-notch work as a Guardian, as Asuma had never caught any rumors of major screw-ups from that group while Naruto and Shikamaru had been away,

Nobles didn't die, cities didn't fall, and even with all of Naruto's baggage (that wasn't really all his fault that he had) the capital and the Daimyo's court remained standing by the time he'd left, so he'd also curried more favor with the man from the results of his work alone.

He'd probably tried for years to ensure that he'd have Naruto's services beyond the three year contract that the boy had originally signed. But homesickness was a bitch, and there wasn't any way he was going to keep Naruto in the Guardian's employ any longer than the original agreement short of blackmail.

"We really wish Naruto and Shikamaru were still there actually," Sadao admitted, "Those two helped stop a sure-fire civil war you know? Kazuma, Sora's father? He wasn't dead. He was going to use Sora and bring the rest of your old partners back from the dead as the main piece in a plan to take out your little village."

Asuma knew this as well. Rumors spread quickly. Around sixteen months ago it had happened, and it had been cut off at the knees before it had gotten close to threatening Konoha, "What can I say? My kids are the best."

A snort came from the blind ninja monk, "Modest ain't we?"

There was absolutely no shame in Asuma's game, "Nothing's ever going to make me think they're not," That being said, the two of them entered the Hokage's office, the door closing behind them, courtesy of the ANBU guards keeping watch. Asuma spared a nod to one of the masked special forces, knowing that if an ANBU was going to sit in on this, even as a guard, it would be Yamato.

Hiruzen nodded in greeting to the pair, and leaning against the wall in the corner Jiraiya acknowledged their entry as well.

The Hokage was still feeling the physical exertion from his fight with Danzo, but that didn't mean that the work stopped. Which also meant it couldn't show. Jiraiya and Tsunade were normally in closer proximity to him these days to cover for him, but he was still the face of the village and had to exude a strong presence.

"Well I see no reason not to start the meeting," Hiruzen said diplomatically, "I'm sure the Daimyo has his concerns with Naruto's progress,"

"Not him really. More like his advisors," Despite his connection to the capital, Sadao didn't have any problems being forthcoming with the truth. He wasn't exactly a fan of how the Fire Daimyo could be swayed by those he trusted, "We know Naruto's got a handle on it for the most part, but other nobles in the court don't. They just know he's lost control once before, and it scared the hell out of a lot of them when he did."

Asuma stood by the window and lit himself a cigarette, letting out a noncommittal grunt, "Naruto's not here to give his side of things."

Jiraiya managed to block a laugh, because in hindsight it was hilarious to think about, 'Naruto's side is literally, 'I was playing willpower tug of war and I slipped. In my mind. Could've happened to anybody,'' "This isn't an indictment or something Asuma. I'm pretty sure you realize, teaching that punk how to draw upon the Kyuubi's chakra has pretty much been a practice of throwing shit against the wall and seeing what sticks."

Reaching almost half of the full possible potential he could get to wasn't quite anything to sneeze at. Still, trial and error wasn't exactly the best approach to take when you were dealing with a living force of nature stuck inside of a teenager.

"Chakra control and sheer force of will," Jiraiya continued, punching into his palm, "We found one thing that works for the time being, but any idiot who thinks that's a perfect solution probably should have been swallowed at birth. So let's map this out and work out a godforsaken blueprint here."

Maybe he could write another how-to self-help book based on this crap?

XxX

(With Shikamaru – Sora-ku)

Shikamaru had been on pins and needles since his little discussion with Sasuke, but when your other best option was to go it alone against two S-rank shinobi you had to go with the known-unknown that was on your side instead of the known-unknown of the people you were going to have to fight without him.

He hadn't expected to be taken to a supply store first and foremost out of everything.

The young genius had only seen two human beings in Sora-ku since entering, and he'd seen both of them in this odd, dingy shop located off of the street.

"These are really well-made," A girl their age said as she returned Shikamaru's weapons of choice to him. She had long brown hair and wore a sleeveless red blouse with light colored trousers and kept her upper left arm wrapped in bandages, "Well, the mechanism ins undamaged, and the chamber is oiled so the blades should come out a little faster now."

Shikamaru nodded in unsaid thanks to the girl and looked over his weapons to make sure they hadn't been sabotaged in some way. He'd only handed over the apparatus itself though, not any of the blades that went with it. Everything seemed to be in order as he slipped his hidden wristblades back onto his forearms underneath the sleeves of his jacket and replaced the blades inside of them.

Sora-ku was a big place, but any bit of intelligence on the place said that it was entirely abandoned by humans. He should have known better. There was always a chance that people lived in any sort of place that had been inhabitable in the past. Why one would keep a shop out in an abandoned town though? It was beyond him.

And why did Sasuke know about it?

"It's not an Uchiha Clan base," Sasuke said, as if he could see what Shikamaru was thinking as he sat on the other side of the room, "Not saying we didn't have them, but no. This was a supply shop we used when we were far away from Konoha on missions."

"A supply shop?"

"My clan weren't the only ones who knew about it, just the only ones who knew in Konoha," Sasuke insisted, not knowing quite how to explain things, "There were more, in other villages. I'm not sure how many are actually left though."

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow at the bit of exposition, "So what? Knowing about this place is like some kind of fraternity or something?"

"That's closer than you might figure boy," The old lady said with a laugh, "Our approach to business is something of a holdover from the olden days. The days before your village system was commonplace. Clans had to be outfitted somehow, as most of them focused so much attention on combat that practices like trading and metalworking weren't concerns. Shops like mine were seen as something of neutral zones for certain ones that didn't have standing blood feuds with one another."

The old woman had puffy grey hair and wore a pair of cat ears on her head. She wore a pink scarf and an orange dress and had a black-tipped nose, as if she were a cat herself.

"That little practice stands you know," She continued, "The only enemies the cats will attack are those who look to turn the traditional neutral grounds of our shop into a place of sole gain."

A bemused look came to Shikamaru's face at that, "Hooray for capitalism, the great equalizer."

"Nekobaa, you and Tamaki should clear out with the others," Sasuke said to the old woman. If one were to listen to the inflection of his voice closely, one could almost take it that he sounded concerned, "The reason we're here isn't the only reason you might be in danger. Suna's gathered people outside of the city. They're waiting on something."

"Probably a signal to come in here and exterminate us and Akatsuki in one fell swoop," Shikamaru added, "He's right you know. With what we're doing here, it's probably best if you go. You have an emergency exit don't you?"

Nekobaa nodded and sighed, "Well, business here hasn't been well in a long, long time. That, and Tamaki hasn't been fond of the desert atmosphere for years. Our family has other shops we can go to. I am getting a little too old for this."

Sasuke seemed somewhat relieved that they were apparently going to leave. But before that, he was hoping he could get something useful out of the warning, "Itachi is in Sora-ku."

"I know already dear," Nekobaa said, "He was expecting you to come. Why else would he have come here of all places?" Sasuke's eyes went wide and she set a hand on his shoulder, "Denka and Hina can find him. I'll prepare them to show you where he is."

Shikamaru simply stared at the two of them and then at Sasuke's stunned expression. It was as if he were about to face something he'd been preparing his entire life for, and he wasn't sure if he was ready. That did not create a good mindset to have now of all times.

If he shot off a flare in the middle of a sandstorm as thick as the one outside to signal the others that they would soon have Akatsuki's location, would anyone even see it?

Come to think of it, he remembered looking up into the air before they'd gone inside to see if he could divulge when the storm may let up. From what he could see of the sky, the sand seemed to be… moving in a bit of a circle instead of simply blowing straight through. He hadn't thought of it at the time because he wasn't familiar with the desert's weather patterns. But now that he had a quiet moment to sit and think of everything he'd taken in since entering the city that stuck out.

"I don't think this'll be as straightforward as it should have been."

XxX

Sora-ku.

Standing a mile clear of the city surrounded by ground forces, Baki could take solace in the fact that whatever hell that place was about to become, no one was intended to actually go in there.

Still, it wasn't going to be standing for much longer.

"ANBU will take point and plant explosives in the prime areas of the city. Members of the Puppet Brigade will scout the outskirts. If at all possible, capture one of the objectives you were briefed on," Baki said, "The rest of you, observe, and if necessary prevent any non-friendly from leaving Sora-ku until zero hour. Fan Corps will focus on controlling the flow of the sandstorm."

With the manipulation of the sandstorm it would keep things clear for their forces, while convincing anyone inside of the city that leaving would result in certain death for them. It was ironic that remaining inside of Sora-ku away from the danger of the storm was the thing that would wind up killing them in the end.

The foreign shinobi and the international terrorists may have gone in, but they wouldn't be coming out. There were simply too many high-profile figures in one place who would be killing each other to let it just happen without:

a) Ensuring that it did in fact happen.

b) Keeping the situation contained when it actually did.

It was just as well. Who would give any of these figures free reign within the limits of Kaze no Kuni? To simply let them and then sit back as whatever damage occurred as a result would cause them to lose face with the new Wind Daimyo who had only recently began to favor the shinobi of his own country again.

Baki understood all of this, all of the reasoning behind why this was happening. He was old, grizzled, had seen it all. Backstabbing and plots were as much a part of their society as any of the other ninja arts. Between nations, trust was just a five-letter word that would get you stabbed in the time it would take you to say it.

One of the younger ninjas amongst the ground forces didn't exactly see it so cut and dry.

"And what about Konoha and Kumo?" The young man asked. His vest was completely unmarked; no cuts or wear evident on the informal body armor. Oh, he was brand new. Well that was just adorable, "This is the kind of thing wars get started over, isn't it?"

"It's a battleground involving Akatsuki and three jinchuuriki," Baki said, explaining Sunagakure's plausible deniability in this case, "If none of them come back and nothing is left standing by the end of it, there's nothing that can be said or done. If anyone has any problems, what are we to say? That we were just to let three foreign jinchuuriki have their run of demolishing the land in our country?"

Besides, it was more than likely that in such a situation, Kumo and Konoha would turn on each other before taking aim at anyone else. Those two had been looking as if they would be taking one another on for the better part of a decade with Kumo moving into position for the number one spot of strongest hidden village. Now they were seemingly more poised to fight one another than ever with what had been going on recently. All they needed was a decent excuse.

Losing a jinchuuriki or two in this black hole of a mission was as good an excuse to cause a dust-up between the two villages as any that had ever come up in any previous war. And if Kumo and Konoha wound up fighting, neither of the two would be the strongest anymore.

International politics in a military society was a dirty game. You had to play dirty to win it.

Omake: 'Til What Do Us Part? (2)

In hindsight, Ino felt that perhaps she should have known better than to go to Sakura first with her newfound issue. Visiting a nice, outdoor ice cream place was supposed to be calming. It was a calming food. But when your best friend found your circumstances laughable, it tended to sour the experience.

Ino dropped her spoon down into her empty bowl and slammed her hands on the table between herself and a thoroughly amused Sakura, "It's not funny Forehead!"

"You're right, you're right," Sakura said, waving Ino off and schooling her own features into a blank look. It lasted for all of half a second before her composure broke and she began to laugh again, "Oh, no you're not! It is funny!"

She didn't even feel like rising to the jab at her forehead. It was more fun to poke at Ino than to get into an argument regarding the nicknames of choice that both girls had for the other.

"I'm starting to think Goldie has a point when he says that our friends suck," The blonde telepath muttered, glaring at her closest friend out of the corner of her eye.

"Come on. This is what friends are for," Sakura reasoned, "Having problems that you can laugh at so you can take your mind off of your own. Oh, you finally get the boyfriend you want, and he's engaged! That's got to be something out of a romance novel."

"I mean, it's Naruto!" Ino emphasized, as if that would explain everything. And it did. It just wasn't what Sakura had been expecting, as she didn't say a word in dispute she just grinned and raised an eyebrow questioningly, "…You know what I'm talking about! He was an acquired taste and you know it!"

This did nothing to dull Sakura's sense of humor at the situation, "Mm-hmm. Apparently that Shizuka girl acquired it too."

"She wants to marry him so he can give her village some powerhouse babies," Ino deadpanned, eliciting an actual blush out of Sakura, "That's literally the only reason she's here. Also, I'm going to kick Shikamaru's ass when I see him again, because I'm almost entirely sure that it's his fault she showed up."

Neither Naruto nor Ino had seen the lazy Nara since all of this had begun to occur, and Naruto frequently cursed his name and punched at the air randomly whenever he was particularly irked by the current affairs surrounding them.

It had been three days since Shizuka had made her presence known, and those three days had been filled with her trying to convince Naruto with logical reasoning as to why she was the best choice as a significant other. Part of this logical reasoning was an outright attempt to point out her physical appeal over Ino, and the fact that she was to be the leader of her village with all of the strengths of personality that would come with such a thing.

More than once when she'd been in the dark-haired woman's presence, Ino had contemplated stabbing her with a poisoned senbon, just once. Nowhere she'd actually feel it, but somewhere that would definitely shut her up.

But she was technically a diplomat, and there was a chance that could get messy.

With the mood effectively sobered, Sakura shifted to proactive mode. As funny as it was, friends also tried to help other friends, "So… what are you going to do?"

"Nothing," Ino replied, as if the word left a bitter taste in her mouth, "Naruto said he'd handle it, and sometimes a girl's got to trust her man."

If skepticism was a color, at that moment it would have been pink, similar to Sakura's hair, "Naruto?"

"Yes."

"I figured his first choice to fix the problem would've been the thing you actually want to do to her," In other words, beat her up and kick her out, because more often than not Naruto's conflict resolution involved physical conflict, "I'm sorry, but I can't really imagine a solution from him where that doesn't happen."

XxX

"Nadeshiko Village women are kind of… persistent, one could say," Shiho said, adjusting the thick glasses on her face as she sat down at her table with her guest, "They're extremely stringent about the law where they have to marry the man who defeats them. There might not be any reasonable way out of this."

Naruto had been hoping that one of the most logical, level-headed women he knew could help him out when it came to one such as Shizuka. Shiho was his best bet to pull this off with any semblance of decency and he knew it.

With a sigh, Naruto reached out and grabbed both of Shiho's hands in his for a heartfelt plea, "I came to you because Shikamaru is an asswipe, and other than him you're the smartest person I know," His voice was solemn and pleading. It was… strange to hear him asking so earnestly for assistance, "Please, I need you. I trust you. Help me get out of this."

The thing was, he didn't even have to. Shiho would have helped him if he'd come knocking and asking normally. He didn't ask for it much. But for Naruto to be so serious and composed about it, it wouldn't have been possible for her to turn him down.

"Well, you can't have a fiancé if you have a wife, so you could marry Ino-."

"We're seventeen years old!" Naruto immediately said, recoiling at the thought. That would be a disaster if there ever was one. Nothing good would come of that at this juncture, "Nobody's ready for that! I'm doing this to keep from having a wedding I'm not ready for!"

"-but that might start a war. Let me finish," Shiho continued, giving Naruto a stern look, "Beating her in a fight didn't help, and you were too hardheaded to throw the fight against her back when you had the chance," It was there that Shiho noticed something off about Naruto's posture, "What is it?"

Naruto fidgeted in his seat upon being pressed, "I didn't technically win a fight with her. We both just stopped after I turned on the red."

That particular turn of phrase represented the gigantic being of inhuman chakra residing inside of his body. It was not lost on Shiho, who was more than astute enough to break it down for herself.

"…You tapped into the Kyuubi's chakra and that made her stop?" It took a moment, but Naruto did nod in confirmation. Shiho lifted her glasses just high enough so that she could rub the bridge of her nose, feeling a headache coming on, "Oh, you are so much smarter than you were when we met, but you miss so many things sometimes."

Instead of taking offense, Naruto just stared at her for a long moment, "That's the nicest way anybody's ever called me dumb that I've ever heard."

Ugh, that was what advisors and trusted confidants were for it seemed. Therefore Shizuka took it upon herself to explain, "You never beat her because even if she conceded after the fact, you never accepted victory. If anything, it's a draw at best, and if it comes down to it you can argue that. I don't think that by itself would stop her though."

"She'll still hound me to go with her and marry her."

"Yes. If you want this to absolutely go away, you have to have another man win against her in a battle. You need a ringer Naruto-kun."

"And who the hell am I gonna get that's strong enough to pull it off, and stupid enough to fight her to win in the first place?" Naruto wondered aloud. Not that he was blaming Shiho for the idea, but it wasn't as simple as it seemed from first glance, "Shizuka's actually fucking tough. Anyone I could think of would ask me why I want them to fight her, and when they find out why they're not gonna say yes."

Shiho shrugged her shoulders in defeat, offering a pitying smile, "That's your responsibility. I'm afraid I'm not very close with the side of our ninja forces that actually fight. You're actually the strongest friend I have. Which isn't exactly a small thing to say."

She couldn't have all the answers to his questions. If the solution were really so casual, he probably wouldn't have needed the help to begin with. As it stood, Naruto was grateful that Shiho spared the time that she did to hear about his damned problem.

The shifts at the Konoha Archive Library were absurd, and Shiho had been pulling more hours than ever since the Kabuto breach in security that had slipped through the cracks had come to light cleaning up the system.

Naruto bid her farewell and went on his way to try and figure something else out before the thing with Shizuka turned into a huge mess.

Making sure he was well and gone, Shiho exhaled a breath of relief and knocked on a wall near her kitchen. Moments later, Shikamaru spilled out of a nearby broom closet, "…Troublesome."

"Was it worth it to start all of this Shikamaru?" Shiho asked after the fact. She was willing to offer him asylum so to speak. What other time would Shikamaru actually ask her to come over to her house? Still, she was by now well aware that he was the primary reason one of her very best friends happened to be in a pickle.

From on the ground, Shikamaru opened his eyes and stared up listlessly at the ceiling, blinking slowly, "I'll tell you what. Give me a week, then I might have an answer to that."

Alright, this took a while, and I'm sorry for that.