Chapter 13 - The Two Types Of People In A Relationship

Arjun could have never imagined his first date to be so different, in a good and romantic way, or a spicy pizza meal to be so delicious. Miss. D looked at him as dreamily as she gazed at the night sky. He wanted to ask which of the two she liked better, but was afraid he might lose out to the starry night. It was just the right amount of cool and pleasant indeed, just what she loved.

After they finished their dinner, he helped her clean up the place as she carefully picked up the crumbs and dumped the boxes at the recycling bins. She then led him back to the swings where she sat on one swing and gestured Arjun to take the swing next to hers. He sat down, his body twisted towards her, gazing at he as she slowly swayed to and fro, her feet tracing lines in the sands below the swings.

"Miss. D," he said slowly. "You don't have to always do things for me. It's okay if you push and pull little."

She eyed him feeling a little unsure.

He turned the swing a little to the side to face her directly and explained, "You always keep doing things for me, helping me out with my troubled thoughts and problems, making me feel good, encouraging me, putting yourself in my shoes and accepting just everything about me. It feels like you are always giving me something. You don't have to be so accommodating all the time."

She sighed. "Mr. J, in any relationship there are two types of people: the giver and the receiver. Sometimes both the persons involved can be of the same type. I have always been the giver. I don't know why, whenever I am with someone I value I end up trying to give everything I can to the person." She didn't seem resigned or regretful. She was simply stating a fact.

"I know, that's who you are," he asserted. "But, Miss. D, there are people who would take you for granted, and that would eventually hurt you. I would never be able to see you getting hurt."

"I know. I have tried to stop doing that. I guess I need a lot of conditioning to learn to not be so accommodating towards everyone. Believe me, I am a lot better than how I was two years before. I have learnt to say 'no' and I am taking the position of the 'giver' only with the people I am affectionate to." She was being honest.

Arjun leaned forward and levelling his gaze at her, said, "At least with me you can be however you want to. You can get upset, you can get angry, you can frown and you can say 'no'."

"Why would I do that to you? I am even more helpless when it is you," she said it as if it was the most natural thing.

Arjun's lips twitched at the corners and rose into an involuntary smile. She would be the death of him. "Just try. I feel like I am always at the receiving end. I don't remember doing anything for you," he professed.

"You waited for me," she reminded him, her voice strong and deep. "That's not something anyone would have ever done for me." She stared at him with her eyes mellowing and lips setting to a sad smile. Taking a deep breath, she confessed, "I might take some more time to be more open and confident with you. I know how I feel about you and you know that too. But if I have to be completely in step with you, in sync with you, even to be intimate with you, I might take a bit of time. I have to keep telling myself that it is okay to love you, that you wouldn't change, that you would love me as much as I do. I will be insecure with myself, I will try to be as accommodating and accepting as I can be, I will often be scared even. But, it is something I am trying to cure myself of. And I might be slow."

Arjun heard it all knowing fully well what she meant. He had read her journal so many times that he knew what her fears were and what her weaknesses made her. He had always wanted to heal her and make her stronger. It was tie he did everything he had wanted to do for her.

He got up from the swing he was sitting in, stepped close towards her to kneel in front of her, took her hands into his and replied, "It's okay. You don't have to force yourself to rush out of your shell. We can take it slow. I will match my pace with yours. I will keep telling you that it is okay to love, and I will keep telling you everyday how precious you are. Maybe not in words always, but I will make sure you feel it deep down. We can take one step at a time. You don't have to feel insecure with anything related to me. If you are ever in any doubt or confusion, just ask me. You just have to say the word. Don't hesitate. Never hesitate if it is about me."

He slowly took her face into his hands, his warm palms cupping her cold cheeks, and leaned forward till his forehead touched hers. She didn't flinch or squirm, and he was sure he could hear her heartbeat. It was pounding erratically, as loudly as loud as his was beating. Placing his forehead against hers, he whispered, "We will heal you. Let it be slow. Slow burns are always a perfect recipe for a strong bond. It will be wonderful at the end."

She nodded; he could feel it with their foreheads touching and he nodded too. He could hear her breathe and could feel eyes flutter as she blinked her tears away.

"It's okay," he whispered.

She murmured a 'hmm' in agreement as she placed her one hand on his shoulder and another on his hand that was cupping her cheek, grasping his hand in assurance.

It had been a perfect date for him indeed. Arjun walked her home, buying her another ice cream from a street vendor on the way, telling her how his noisy cousins had planned a vacation in Goa only to cancel it a few days later because Abhinav's girlfriend didn't get along well with Chaitra. It had been a chaotic call with Abhinav and Chaitra bickering crazily, Nihita acting the referee between them and Arjun being a silent witness. Miss. D laughed naturally, slipping into the usual camaraderie she had with him. She joked how ninety percent of Goa trip plans with friends and cousins always fall apart. It was a universal rule in India.

Before ringing the bell of her house, she turned to Arjun and with a warm smile affirmed, "I had a great time. Buy me a South Indian meal next time."

"Sure," he promised. "I can't imagine I let you pay for our first date." He pouted a little in regret that looked adorable.

"It's not the horror of your life. So, relax," she laughed.

He squeezed her hand in acceptance.

It had indeed been a great night for him. When he returned home grinning ear to ear, Vinodh gave him a look that clearly said he didn't seem normal.

The next morning Arjun restrained himself from going directly to their usual spot at the beach and instead, proceeded to go for his jog first. By the time he finished jogging and reached his spot, Miss. D was already seated there, jotting down something in a journal that seemed new.

"Hey," he greeted her, panting from the run.

She looked up at him brightly and responded, "Hey, right on time!"

"Yes. I am so proud of my self control. I would have otherwise come over here an hour earlier."

Miss. D laughed. In many ways, it seemed like one of the morning they had spent two years ago.

"Is that a new diary?" he asked her, sitting next to her.

"Yes, for a new start," she said, getting back to her writing endeavour.

"That's nice."

As they sifted through various topics of discussion and settled on talking about future plans and dreams, Arjun narrated his work on a coastal eco retreat resort that he was thinking of pursuing.

And Miss. D stated her plans of leaving the city.

"I will be leaving this weekend," she told him quietly.

"What?" he asked in disbelief. "You are leaving again? Why?"

"I have a job Mr. J. I am on vacation now and have to get back to Bangalore," she explained as patiently as she could, peering at him intently to make him understand that it was inevitable.

He understood what she was saying. Duty calls, it wouldn't be fair for him to ask her to stay back.

The disappointment on his face must have been very much evident, for Miss. D put her hand on his arm and said, "I know we haven't had much time to spend together. But, I can't avoid this. I like my work, and my organization doesn't have an office here in this city for me to get a transfer."

"Yeah, I understand that," he mumbled. "Reality is tough at times. When will you be back here?"

"I don't know. Maybe the next time I have a long weekend or some festive seasonal holidays."

It was going to be a long distance relationship. Arjun wasn't worried about how it would work between them, rather he was bothered about how he would be able to handle not being able to see her again for an extended time. True, he had promise her that they would take it slow, one step at a time, and that he would match his pace with hers. But, they have to be at the same place, be consistently able to see each other to heal her heart, condition her for self-love and to love him. How would he be able to do anything for her if she wasn't in the same city as him?

He met her gaze to see that she herself was feeling a little low about the whole situation. He didn't like to see her so subdued.

"It's okay," he tried to cheer her up. "We still have time before you leave. We can make most of it."

She eased into another of her bright smiles.

Keeping up his word, Arjun reduced his workload to spend most of his time with Miss. D the remaining couple of days. They would go for strolls along the beach, search for restaurants with tastier food rather than big names, venture for long drives and spend hours in book stores giving an idea to each other on the types of books they love and read.

When she actually left to the airport to catch a flight to Bangalore, Miss. D made sure she took a cab alone, unlike the previous visits where her father or brother would drop her at the airport, so Arjun would be able to see her off. It wasn't a sad farewell; she knew she would see him again soon. She had been planning her next visit four weeks from the present date, but didn't tell him of it lest he got his hopes up and her plans fell through. She wanted to surprise him by actually turning up.

By the time she reached Bangalore, she was missing him and felt a little better than how she had when she had actually made the visit. Ten days before that, she had been a loner who had been missing the man she had an unrequited love on, she had been scared of loving anyone and had been fearful of the reaction Arjun might give in case they accidentally met anywhere. She hadn't known the how much in love Arjun was with her. Meeting him again and talking to him, looking into his dense brown eyes and watching him smile warmly at her had instilled a little confidence in her that she was very well loved.

She felt a little healed, as if she now knew the way to walk through.

They spoke to each other consistently; no secrets between then this time, except for maybe their travel plans to surprise each other.

Three weeks later, one day at seven in the morning, there was a knock on Miss. D's door. She had just returned from a morning jog and was about to go for a shower, her hair tied up in a mess, when she heard the door bell go.

She wondered who it was so early in the morning.

"Who is it?" she asked aloud opening the door.

There stood in front of her, grinning jubilantly and looking bit every handsome as he could, wearing a white button up shirt and blue jeans, Mr. J.

Her heart skipped a beat as she stared at him in surprise. "What..." she couldn't finish her sentence.

"Well, I am moving to Bangalore. For good," he answered, smiling with a gleam in his bright eyes.