There I was at the end of the tunnel, I saw the light. What would await me on the other side? For anyone that had answered an immigration office for main characters, how did you know?
Sadly, I would never get an answer to this question. Why? Currently, I was waiting for my turn to be interviewed to gain access to this new world.
The only problem being the ticket number I had been given. Mine was 123456789 and I had to wait for 123456790 main characters to undergo serious testing before me.
See you guys, at the heat-death of the Universe.
But as a full-blooded writer, it was my duty to wait until I became too impatient.
So I sat in this plain waiting room that smelled like something had died here and waited for something to happen.
Yes, the white wall did indeed look wonderful. Oh, the ceiling was painted white too─man, even the tiles were white. Look, the chairs and the skeletons sitting on them were as white as snow as well.
The interior designer really had a good feeling about what was closest to a psychiatric ward.
I had a sneaking suspicion that something could not be right. Maybe it was just paranoia, but why did hand-sized eyes appear on the wall?
Those damn talent scouts had their eyes and ears everywhere. Placing the ears on the chairs themselves was nevertheless a questionable position.
Hear me out, it was really pleasant after a while.
Since they were all ears, it was time for the hero to introduce themselves to the crowd.
"My name is Author, I am a very humble man. I came here to win the WSA competition and take the 10k price money and the anime adaption."
A short pause to let these eyes and ears comprehend my absolute awesomeness.
"My writing is literally perfect, you will find no one better than me in this room", which was not hard to accomplish, as everyone else had already ascended to the after-after-afterlife.
"My system novel is something you have never seen. I swear upon my left nut that it will literally blow your eyes out."
Since my left testicle had not spontaneously dematerialised, I could assume that my marketing strategy had been a complete success. All eyes were on me and I was soooo close to convincing these entities to shower me with prize money.
The time had come, it was time for the ultimate never-before-seen strategy─ the tear-jerker.
" You see, life had not always been on easy mode for me. People were not so nice to me, I have suffered from the tragic backstory syndrome."
Adding a bit of tragedy to the mix was the way to go if you want your readers and these eyes to get invested in your story.
Well, lemme just sprinkle in some lies about my mother, since most people have that sort of thing and can relate.
" I am writing for my sick mother, without winning the prize money I could never afford the expensive medicine she needs to survive. In order to save her, I need to write a super-duper story"
Lying was not okay; unless it was to make money… then it was more than okay.
To top it all off, I squeezed away a few fake tears and my performance was absolutely perfect. My acting was so incredible that I almost felt sorry for myself.
Touched by my performance all the eyes shed countless tears. But that was not the reason why they were currently crying like a 5-year old brat that did not get a lollypop.
The scouts had seen the statistics of my story and thus they could not help themselves…
11k words written, 1.3k views and 4 poor souls that had added the story into their library, who would not cry seeing statistics as sad as this.
Even the bikini-clad elfen woman had abandoned me for another story, she left me for someone that had 8 collections just after the first chapter.
She said that she could not be the cover girl for someone as talentless as me. This loss stung a lot, especially after I saw the bill she left me for her services.
So please ignore the following advertisement; I need the money.
Read the Maggot-System only on Webnovel… SelfProclaimedNerd's best story yet. Full of tension, you will never be able to put down the story. Only here on Wenovel.
End of advertisement.
As if the God of Sellout approved of my willingness to sell my story to others, a hole appeared beneath my feet and swallowed me whole.
I arrived at the next stage in order to reach the world of the main characters.
It was the toughest challenge I had to face yet. Answering a multiple choice quiz about the rich history of well-designed characters of WN.
There was just one slight problem the pages were blank.
Was this some sort of reverse psychology test? Hmm, yeah there had to be a trick to all of this. The solution was actually very easy.
I gotta admit, it took me quite some time to figure out the hidden meaning of this entire test. All that needed to be done was make your own answers.
Best story ever written?
- Of course, it was mine. Everything around it was flawless, aside from it not being written yet.
Best protagonist of the story?
Me, do I even need to explain that? There was no way that anybody could dislike me. Men or women wanted to be me. Even I wanted to be me.
Best comedy?
Clearly, the PENIS main character. People literally laughed themselves till their hearts stopped. It was that funny. Nothing was as haha-causing as his name. Prince Edward of Isle Secularis…
Hihi Penis.
Best end to a chapter?
This was one was quite tricky, there were many ways this topic could be tackled. Cliffhanger-san was used often to keep the readers guessing and on their toes.
Though would it really be alright to keep your readers in the dark about what might happen next? I think only straight-up A-holes would do something as horrible as this.
Wait, I think the correct answer was....