Just kidding, who really cared about a reverse Harem at this point? If guys could dream about all sorts of women; why could girls not dream about being swarmed by a tide of sausages?
What annoyed me the most was that some random dude seriously had to ask whether or not there was a harem in this story. Dude, the story is tagged "HighIQ" and was callled System for Dummies.
Who could have thunk that this story was a parody? Hmmmmmmmm, truly no one. Yes, all these reviews about holding their families hostage or seeking customer support were totally not fake at all.
But still, one could still mistake those for genuine reviews....maybe the reviewer just suffered from a terrible case of brain damage after stroking their little friend for 24 hours straight.
Because every reviewer was really authentic and not a psychic author rating the story 5 stars without having opened it once.
Only the most trustworthy readers and maybe people trying to get you to write for their sweatshop would leave such nice feedback to all aspiring young talents out there.
So clearly, how should the average reader out there realize that this was just a joke?
One could not expect any of them to use their brain for more than 10 seconds. Or actually read the summary or take a look at the titles of the chapter. Of course, everyone reading to this point was most likely not affected by such levels of stupid as the Harem guy.
How could I even make the densest moron understand that there should have never been a harem in the first place? Do you think these frogs were happy about being created just to be part of a reverse Harem?
Did you not once, in your endless lust for harem stories, consider how the created characters must feel about being forced into this kind of relationship?
In the real world, most women just barely manage to stomach the idiocracy of a single one. Not many of those would read a story about having a reverse Harem and would desire to be the MC.
Whereas the limp-dick-society aka male readers thought that they can take on a massive harem.
Now, not to ruin that confidence of you kings, but ye should be happy if you find someone that loved you for whom you are. Life was too damn short to spend your time in a fictional universe.
There's happiness for everyone out there. I was not saying this as an author trying to add more words to the wordcount, but just as the spectator that saw the frogs murder each other for the favour of the Frog Princess.
Call me old-fashioned, yet I preferred the kind of relationship, which was not to die for in the most literal sense of the word. Things like this better stay fictional...
The first kiss might be off the table, but on a more positive note, I would not be kissed by these gigantic weapons first. The latter was breathtaking, just not in the way one would usually like it to be in.
Being the spectator was much more enjoyable than some kind of tongue action, let me tell you that much. Cuz the alternative was death and I was having none of that stuff today.
Since it was my job to give you guys the greatest content of all.
Unless that involved demands such as "Pls gimme Harem, or "gimme Smut". This twisted world would take those words and turn them into straight-up nightmare fuel. Good luck telling your therapist about your fear of frog harems.
And I would also prefer not to know what kind of hidden meaning the desire to be kissed by a steroid frog had.
Ignorance was more than bliss in this particular situation.
As its said, some things better remain unsaid. Like why did the author here, refuse to write a proper story and curses the readers of Wn whenever given the chance or why did your sister buy that 9-inch toy?
Getting answers was not always the best decision to keep your sanity. Lest we all forget; that such events would burn themselves into your mind quicker than one could find R-18 material on this website.
Yup, whether you liked it or not it would stay with you.
Funny story, you might not believe me....these frogs were kinda immortal. Which was not good for my plans to snack the Princess after everyone had mortally wounded one another. So, lemme just pull the "Dad-getting-milk" trick and silently disappear.
I needed to get away from this whole bit as soon as possible. This content here had already been farmed enough. There had to be something else to entertain my readers with.
Angry, murderous frogs had been cool yesterday, yet today they were old news and should be forgotten about. Me even mentioning them was the biggest cringe any hip author could do.
Where were the freshest memes promised in chapter 1?
Quick Gods of content, lead me to the promised land of meme material! There I would find another trend to follow and make fun of. My close to 300 collections depended on it.
How else should I mask my incompetence and hide the fact that I was unfunny? The moment I would use my own brain to design comedy scenes my readers would understand what a kind of fraud their favourite author was.
Though to be fair, most of them only read one or two chapters. Which made this kind of worry pretty darn useless.
It ain't like WN readers were very picky about their entertainment. Hehe XD, he said penis; that one counted as peak quality comedy writing on this website. And I would know I have been reusing that joke over and over again in here.
Still, I would never disappoint my fellow memelords─for they are the true leaders of the anti-intellectual movement.
How could I not fight tooth and nail then? These people were making me more money.
FFS, could this get any drier than it already was? I swear, sometimes it felt like I could talk for hours and here I wonder what kind of rubbish I should mention next.
Might as well go back to the reverse Harem and just describe whatever nonsense entered my eyes. On second thought, how about avoiding any kind of trauma? There was no outrunning these harem fanatics.
Simply mention it once and they were already knocking on your door. Could they not act like your stalkers? Those fellas at least knew how to keep their distance. Besides, they already knew that I would not write such garbage in the first place...
...to be absolutely honest, I would have written stuff like that. Sadly, no one would want to read those stories written by someone with an active brain.
Alas, I was cursed with standards that hindered me in making a buttload of cash. How enviable those people were who honestly thought they could write well. This way, I wouldn't be ugly and poor, but ugly and rich.
However, everyone had expected it, there was more walking again until we'd come across some interesting opportunity. As if we haven't done this a thousand times before.
Well, there were really few alternatives to using the two legs. Unfortunately, I couldn't do anything about it, boss. You had to bite the bullet and suffer with me as nothing of interest was taking place.
Just so we were clear, whenever I said "Oh look there is content ahead" you readers should know that there indeed was content ahead."
Let us try for once as a practice run.
"Oh look there is content ahead." That worked out mighty fine. So, be aware whenever you saw "Oh look there is content ahead" then you knew that there was a plot ahead.
That being said there was still no content ahead because this world hated fun.
Okay, this can not continue....I need the content. Gimme that juicy Content, or else people would drop the story again. According to the statistics, nobody might be reading it, but I wanted the number to rise for all of eternity!!!
As one could clearly see, the author here was very much sane. And in no shape or form had lengthening the chapter taken a toll on his already worn-out mental health.
The author wanted to let you know that everything was a-okay!
No, there was no psychosis; I was simply bored!
"Oh look there is content ahead."
.....