It was like all the resolve I'd held on to for years just came apart in one single thought. Here I was, on a cruise with someone that really liked me but I couldn't let myself be loved because I was afraid. The reality dawned on me, causing tears to steam profusely down my cheeks. I wondered why I was this way. Actually, it was no wonder, just going through the motions in thoughts. Scott could love me and I still wouldn't let him because I was afraid of turning out like they turned out. My parents didn't have enough love to spend on themselves talk less of the child they pretended to care about. I tried to hold back the tears but it also felt right to just it go. It felt like a dam had been undone. Something that should not have been in the first place. I believe that I deserved more love than they showed and if they had any love to show themselves, it was clearly lost.
I heard a knock on the door that caused me to jump to my feet.