Chapter 3 : Don't Doubt This Because This Is Intimacy For Me

I sometimes think, why do I have to suffer things like this? I pressed F5 already, log-out then log-in again. But the post is still there. Fucking Sarawat. So fucking shameless. He not only unlocked my phone, but he also harassed me through a status just before bed.

As I did not want things to escalate any further by being misunderstood by the girls, I had to search my name in the chat so I could immediately message him for a cursing session.

Tine TheChic

Saraleo Sarawat! How did you know my password?

I saw the typing button so I know he read the message. Instead of replying, he just sent an emoji.

[I saw it]

Do you get it? Sarawat used my Facebook to type the message while I continuously responded with the same account. It looks as if I am talking to myself, except I am

not. I've got six digits as my password. How did you know?

[123456, a moronic password.]

This asshole is really something. His face is bright but his mouth is poisonous. I silently cursed him loudly in my heart but my reply was lighter.

Saraleo! Instead of getting a reply, what I got was...

(  ̄.  ̄)

Don't mess with my Facebook. Consider his as a warning.

Σ (° △ ° |||)

Do you understand?

¯ _ ( ツ) _ / ¯

Ah! Bastard! I can't stand you anymore.

Σ ( ⊙ ▽ ⊙ ")

Stop sending me stickers!

Σ ( っ° Д °;) っ

( ・'З' ・)

⁄ (⁄ ⁄ • ⁄ω⁄ • ⁄ ⁄) ⁄

Alright, I'm giving up!

( ๑♡ ∀ ♡ ๑)

Stop!

(' ⊙ ω ⊙ ')

Son of a bitch! I shouldn't have downloaded so many stickers. He basically used all of them. Our conversation was nonsense. I delete the messages and start to go ballistic on him because of his repetitive sticker usage behavior.

Ting!!

Less than three minutes later, a notification arrived. It is a status on my facebook timeline.

Tine TheChic

***Hurry! Long legs xxx clip with high quality big ass! Right-click before it is deleted!!!***

Woahhhh, what an asshole! Not only did he watch porn, but he also got viruses on my facebook. Now, I am in trouble. I don't know where the clips spread. All I could do was word my mouse and delete all these awful images. This is crazy. Even people who have never messaged me start to ask if something's up. That horny?

Some people think I imagine Sarawat so much that I'm turned on. When in truth, I am thinking about the time when I take him, break his legs, and drown him in the water with satisfaction.

At first, I thought I could hold it a little and finish it tomorrow morning. But now that I can't take it anymore, I rush and rush to dial my number. I've waited a long time and I still have no answer from that bastard.

The first call is not picked up, the second call is still not picked up, the third call is also not picked up. Before I could even open my mouth to drool, I heard a voice from the operator that made my tears fall...

"The number you have dialed cannot be reached. Please try and call again later."

He turned off my cell phone...

The next day, I felt everything looked dark because I could not see the brightness from my eyes. Why? Because I wasn't able to sleep last night. Not because I am scared of Green hunting me in my dreams, but because I am obsessed with Sarawat's face that I wanted to crush it until broken... But I can't do anything. When the sun comes up, I lift my head from the pillow. I take a shower and quickly go to the campus. I am thinking later in the day, I'd jump on Sarawat and hit him in the head. I am not asking him to help be my cockblock. I am really sulky right now. I am like on my irregular period cycle.

"Yo, Tine! Give me your homework so I can copy it."

"You're kidding, right? Don't you know what happened?" I walked towards Peuk, threw my bag on the table, and looked at him seriously.

"What's wrong? Why are you pouting like that? Are you raped by the rice restaurant owner?"

"I have a worse problem than that."

"Oh, I know. You're stressed about your horny Facebook status, right? I understand that Sarawat's hot, but did you really have to announce it like that? Or were you that turned on?"

"Turned on, my ass! I'd rather have my mom message-scolding me."

"Ehh? So what is that status for?"

"I didn't post that."

"Not you? Then who? Your father?"

"Nevermind." I finished the topic and ran to order apple juice at the booth nearby. After paying, I brought my glass to the table and at the same time, Ohm and Fong also arrived.

"Tine, I'm glad you're here. Before I went to the faculty, I met Green there. He was looking for you." Ohm told me with his casual face. And this makes my soul lost.

"Then what did you say to him?"

"I said you weren't here yet. Probably still humping the pillow in your room."

"Shit."

"That's good, right? He probably ran to go drown himself. I heard you did heavy stuff last night."

"Don't remind me." I can only grit my teeth and look at the faces of my male leads hopelessly. I mean, just bringing myself here to the faculty without having people stare was already the hardest.

"Fine."

"I don't want to talk about it."

"How you broke my heart."

"If I stay here."

"Just a little bit longer."

"If I stay here."

"Won't you listen to my heart? Oh, my heart."

"You know what baby?"

"What?"

"Go dig yourselves graves! Do I look like I'm in the mood?" Although I fucking went along and almost completed the song. Shit.

Sometimes, being with these three children is also fun. We have everything except the future and money. The only thing visible is the sad college life. Even so, it also helped me calm down a little before my anxiety began to increase again because I had to hurry to find Sarawat and finish the story last night.

And one thing that I am sure of is that Lord Sarawat is now in the Political Science building.

"Copy my homework first. Then pass it for me too." I stood up and grabbed my bag and apple juice.

"Where are you going?"

"Look for Sarawat." I answer honestly.

"Wow! Is your heart calling him?" Fong fidgeted with a loud noise, and even a wink made me want to jump with my feet.

"Heart's not calling him, my feet are!"

"You're going to hurt him?"

"No! I am hurting you if you won't stop being nosy."

"Please, friend. Raise your head and walk away. Take care!"

As soon as I stepped into their building, all eyes were on me as if I had committed a very serious crime. Senior, or even the freshmen like me, they all turn to me with radars on.

Fuck. I feel like I'm in the wrong fucking place.

I've never done anything that is wrong. I never steal the food from the temples, so why do I have to bring myself into such a difficult situation? Stresing won't get me anywhere though. Maybe in my previous life, I sinned horribly by putting my nose in other people's business thereby ruining their lives. That is why in this life, I need to pay all my sins by letting others stick their noses in my business too.

I walked across the marble floor a few steps away. Then I saw the person I was aiming at, sitting alone less than twenty meters. So without hesitation, I went straight there.

"Why didn't you pick up my call?" Just arrived and immediately invited the war. Sarawat averted his eyes from the One Piece comic book in his hand and raised his head to look at me with no emotions in his eyes.

"You told me not to pick up anyone's call so I didn't pick up."

"Shit. I meant other people, not me."

"You didn't say that at the time."

"You are provoking me, right? Then, why do you have to turn off the phone?"

"It's annoying."

Right now I really want to kick his ear bone.

"Give me my phone now." Without saying much, I quickly extended my hand in front of him to reclaim my social media freedom.

"Has my cellphone been fixed?" He responded with his annoying facial expression.

"After the repair is complete, I'll return it."

"When it's finished repairing, I'll return yours." Why is that heart so cold? I have never met anyone like this before. I have to talk patiently like this but he won't cooperate. So I had to use the ultimate trick that could make girls kneel at their feet.

"Aw. Don't become infatuated with me. You had my phone for one day, now youdon't even want to give it back?

"Didn't anyone teach you when you were little?"

"Teach what?"

"Not to talk nonsense as a kid because now that you're grown, it has affected you this way."

"This way how? You better be nice."

"The way that you are right now. Stay away from me. You're annoying."

"Annoying, annoying. Can I buy the word so I can throw it away?"

"You won't be able to afford it because my words are gold."

Oh wow! What a hot handsome man. The man with a golden heart.

"Have you really talked to me all this time or you are just reading your comics?" At first, I planned to scold him to make his face go miserable, but it turns out to be me who gets the cold-blooded responses.

"Promise me, you won't touch my phone again."

"If you won't call a lot, nobody will bother you."

"Okay. You've promised me."

At first I was angry, but the moment was gone. My next plan is to smoothly sit on the same table set as him and start a new conversation skillfully.

"Is your nickname Wat?"

"My friends just call me that."

The low voice answered almost immediately. But his eyes were never fixed on me. He should be proud because I never smile this handsomely to any man. He's the first, but this asshole finds his 50-baht comic more important than me.

"So what is your nickname?" I keep asking.

"None."

"What?"

"I don't have it."

"You don't have a nickname?"

"Umm."

"What were your parents thinking? Give birth without giving a nickname?"

(**Thai people usually have really long names, so they use nicknames for daily communication)

"They thought a first name is enough. What a strange question."

I really want to ask him back. How did he manage to grow up? When he introduces himself, does he say 'Hello, my name is Sarawat. I don't have a nickname because my parents did not give me one'. Like that? That's crazy. I mean his family, what category of indie are they? I am confused and I've never encountered this.

"Do you have siblings?"

"Not your fucking business."

"I want to know."

"I have two younger brothers."

"What are their names? In case I get to know them."

"They don't want to be friends with someone like you."

"How do you know? Or do they not have nicknames too? Your whole family calls each other by first names?" I see his world-hating face and I almost laugh out loud. I have an Oscar winning level in sticking my nose where it doesn't belong.

"Phukong and Phumuad." Finally he agreed to tell.

(Sarawat- Inspector, Phukong - Captain, Phumuad - Lieutenant)

"So they do have nicknames."

"My parents finally remembered about nicknames."

So exhausting. I know now where he got his nuisance form. This is going to be hard work. What kind of weird-shit-of-a-person am I trying to befriend?

"My name is Tine."

"Who's asking?"

"Well, I just want to tell you."

"Umm."We are both quiet for a while.

Honestly, if you look at Sarawat carefully, he is actually quite handsome. This is why my friends and I chose him for the final round. Even though he is a big tall man, quite the opposite of my type of woman.

"Why are you staring at me like that?"

Without me noticing, I am staring at his face for a long time. I was so shocked that I raised my hand to scratch my head helplessly.

"Oh. Uhm... Nothing."

"I know I'm handsome. Now, say what you want."

"Damn, you are narcissistic. Actually, I just want you to help me pretend... Uhm... Right now there is someone who is chasing me."

I get to the subject matter.

"She is not beautiful so you don't like her?"

"No. Not like that. The thing is, he is a guy."

Sarawat froze for a moment before rolling his eyes as if he was deep in his thoughts.

No, no. Please don't. I am not homosexual like you think. He then responds with the same monotone voice.

"So what? Isn't it good to be noticed by others?"

"Then let me ask you. You always get a lot of attention. Why don't you like it?"

"Do I have to pay attention to them back? I don't want others to disturb my life. It's troublesome."

"Exactly! Your answer is what I feel right now."

"..."

"But believe me. One day, you will want someone to disturb your life."

"There is already one."

"Really? Where?"

"The one sitting right in front of me, disturbing my life. Troublemaker."

His thick hands went to pat my head, then he left immediately. As for me, I could only pack my things, wondering if I did something wrong.

Am I really annoying?

The opening day for club activities arrived. I tried to enter the crowd of new students who had gathered to fill the hall. Today, we have to register for an academic club in a certain amount of time before we can graduate soon.

I haven't thought about what club I should join, because Green keeps sticking to me like a hungry leech. It would be very good if I could avoid him. But instead of helping me, my friends left me standing alone and not knowing where to register.

Peuk and Fong left me to go to the traditional medicine club to do a foot massage, while Ohm went to the dance club hoping to stare at girls' panties. They left me standing there awkwardly trying to find a club.

Until I see the Ping Pong club, suddenly my hopes are bright again.

"Hi..."

"We're full!" Before I finished asking, they immediately cut off my words. So I returned to an area where it was filled with people.

This zone has the longest queue. I saw students from the engineering faculty playing guitar on a small stage so I know this booth belongs to the music club.

"Excuse me." I patted the shoulders of the person in front of me because I didn't want to waste my time in line then find out that the club is already full.

"Yes." The fat girl standing in front of me turned her face to look at me.

"How many people are accepted in this club?"

"They said they will only accept fifty people. But now, there are so many people who want to join that seniors will have to filter it again."

"I see. Is this club always crowded every year?"

This time I didn't ask and mumbled to myself when suddenly a senior in an engineering uniform appeared.

"It's usually not like this. It's just that this year, there is a first year who wants to join, then a lot of girls go after him."

"Who is that?"

"Sarawat."

Shiiiaaaaaa. No wonder. This means that the people on this queue are just trying their luck if they can make it to the club or not. But that's fine. I just need to sign the form just to create a moment to deceive Green. He had disappeared for a long time but trust me, he will be here any minute from now.

Everyone took turns filling out the registration form to join the club. Then they distributed a piece of A4 paper. In this paper, we fill in our personal data such as name, faculty and reasons why we want to join the club.

Actually I don't want to join. I just wanted to run away from Green so I had to hold fast to Sarawat. Who would have thought everything would be this difficult? I don't even know how to play the guitar or drums or bass or whatever. But still, I have to try my luck.

Now is the time for the first year students to wait for the tall, dark-skinned senior to step onto the small stage and announce the results of the people who were accepted through a microphone.

"This year's music club has received a great deal of attention from students. We are also very happy and willing to welcome you to join the club. However, because the number of teachers and instruments is limited, we must limit the number of members."

From what I've gathered, last year, it wasn't even this popular. There are hundreds of clubs, but this year is beyond expectation. They even ran out of application forms.

"We choose new members not only those who can play instruments, but also those people who are really passionate about music. So the following names will be part of our club. First, Jirachot from the Faculty of Engineering. Second..."

Then the seniors continued reading everyone's name. Until... "Twenty fourth person, Sarawat from the Faculty of Political Science."

As soon as Sarawat's name was called, all the students waiting beside me stood up, to my surprise... Is this the selection of new members in the club or announcement of lottery winners? But still, without Sarawat, everything will lose its meaning because they all registered here for him.

"Number forty-nine, Kunyarat from Business Management. And the last person..." Teepakorn. Teepakorn. Teepakorn. Just like waiting for the results of the Miss Universe elimination round. I can only sit and wait to hear the results of the international music club.

"Bussaba from the Faculty of Social Sciences."

And just like that,there is no chance anymore. I can only sit rigidly with the remaining beautiful girls.

Actually, I should have stopped chasing Sarawat because finding someone new to help me, or even killing Green, looks so much easier. So I decided to look for a new club no matter how high my risk is about Green. But someone's hand stopped me...

"Saraleo"I call the name of the one in front of me.

"Why? Are you upset that the seniors didn't choose you?"

"Fine, keep throwing that in my face. Honestly, I didn't even want to join this stupid music club. The North-Eastern Thai Cooking club seems way more interesting." Even though I can't cook at all.

"Go then."

"I will definitely go. But... let go of my arm. Why are you stopping me?"

"Dumbshit... You got looks but your intelligence is very nonexistent."

He insulted me again.

"Okay, Mister Smartypants. Mister Ruthless White Lion."

We ridicule each other for a moment and I am pulled to follow the tall boy. He takes me behind the stage where the seniors and the club president are standing

"What's up Wat ?" Senior asks with a surprised expression.

"My friend wants to join this club," Sarawat exclaimed.

Huh? I said I don't want to join this club anymore.

"But there are already enough people in this club."

"Please consider him."

"So... Tine from the Law School, right?" The club president looked at me again and again on the signboard before crossing his arms, he suddenly asked a question

"What instrument do you want to play?"

"Guitar."

"Do you know how to play the guitar?"

"I do not know."

"Ever touched a guitar string?"

"Never."

"Do you know C major?"

"No."

"E minor?"

"Not really.

"F310?"

"..."I shook my head.

"Takamine?"

"What is that?"

"Do you know the types of guitars?"

"I do not know."

"You... then what do you know?"

"Me?" I said while pointing to myself before I stare at the guy next to me with confused eyes.

"..."

"I only know Sarawat. And because of him, I want to play the guitar."

The atmosphere in the first session of the music club was quite noisy because this was the first meeting of the new members and all the seniors. And because we are juniors, we are arranged to sit and focus in the corner of the room. Some people had prepared their instruments. Just like Sarawat, who brought his expensive guitar for the first meeting of the club. He obviously wanted to get a rating with the girls.

"Freshies, first of all I want everyone in this club to choose what instrument you want to play. Let's start with the guitar. Those who choose to play the guitar, please sit on the left. Anyone who wants to play drums, please move to sit behind. Those who want to play bass move to sit to the right... "

The club president then began to mobilize until we were divided into groups. Actually I was a little annoyed because of this. I don't know if I really want to study guitar well or just follow Sarawat. But I insist that I want to learn... for myself.

"Now that you are divided by group, please follow the staff to another room."

I just sat down and now I have to stand up again. This time I walked into a training room that was larger than usual. It can roughly accommodate more people into it.

While we were waiting, people gradually became acquainted with each other. As for me, I was just sitting next to a man who was loved by girls at school. So I started to talk...

"Nice hands." I start.

"We can't all have corn hands like yours."

"Damn it! I'm giving you a compliment but you're making fun of me instead."

"I'm just telling the truth. Do you want me to lie? Troublemaker."

"Stop calling me like that."

"Troublemaker."

"Sarawat!"

"Troublemaker."

"Fuck you."

"Troublemaker."

"Piece of shit!!"

"Troublemaker."

"Hey! The two guys who are arguing at the back. Please come forward."

Damn! This is because of this bastard. Now we don't have a choice but to step forward near the stage.

"I saw you two kept messing around. Come be the last one of the ice breaker activity to make us closer. Do you guys see this piece of candy?"

"Yes."

How does this have anything to do with the activity?

"Girls don't need to join."

I look at the tall senior without blinking. I see him giving the tiny candy to a fellow freshman and I am suddenly old to the core.

"Take off the wrapping."

"Done."

"Place it in your mouth."

Shit, I can feel the destruction that's about to happen in my life.

"Ewww~," the girls start to cry out. Luckily, they only made the guys play but the shitty luck is falling on me instead.

Please no, my beloved seniors. I love you guys. I know you guys won't use this system to break the ice in our club.

"Send the candy to the person next to you, with your mouth."

Just listening makes me nauseous and almost vomit. But my feet were still standing upright as I watched my friends in front of me pass the little candy from mouth to mouth. Noooo. I realize I'm one of the last.

"Accept it quickly, so we will all be close real fast." He adds to the build-up.

Suddenly, the ruthless guys turned into cowards. They all prepare to vomit and it's close to my turn to go suck the candy that's now as small as an ant's vagina. However, in that second, fate seems to be on my side when the friend before me accidentally makes the candy fall on the floor.

Yes! I survived! I wanted to hug Sarawat tightly, but my low senior voice stopped me first.

"We lost the candy but there are still two people left."

"..."

"That's okay. We will start over. Tine from the Law School,open your mouth."

Shit. Who the hell thought of this method? But we can't resist the power of the wicked seniors' dictatorship. He fucking fill me up with three pieces of candy before pushing me to face Sarawat. His face is full of boredom.

"Ahhhh~"

The screams from the girls are so loud. Then I was pushed into a tall body which made the screams even louder. Then a soft deep voice spoke.

"Use your teeth to bite."

Bastard! There are three candies in my mouth. How can I bite all of these? "Huh?"

"Push it out. Can't you do it?"

"Mmmmmmmmmm" I shook my head which means I can't do it.

"Don't swallow or else the seniors are gonna do worse stuff to you."

I really want to cry. I don't control anything except I let his sturdy hands hold my face. He moves his nose close to me and I automatically hold my breath.

"Ahhhh~ Sarawat and Tine!!"

The girls writhe like earthworms and they are screaming so loud. I do not know what to do so I just closed my eyes and let Sarawat's lips touch mine for a moment. After I felt his lips, I was left with tears and I uncontrollably fell to the floor. Bang!!

"Hey!"

The three pieces are still in my mouth. Well, there's a fourth one from Sarawat now added to my catalogue. I want to ask him 'how are you helping me at all'? You are always messing with me.

Fuck you. My heart...