1. The Beginning of The Story

January 27, 2013

Yu Marsiyah, my distant cousin came to the house with a look on my face that I had difficulty describing. A mixture of sadness, surprise, and haste.

"Roni, Til. He was tried at the house of Waru village. Your husband is in a fight with Wati, his wife Mr. Bayan. A lot, Til. Fortunately, your husband was not beaten by the people."

"One of the people might be you, Yu. Mas Roni was in Ngawi visiting his sick mother. Yesterday he just got an SMS from his brother."

"What's wrong? I'm new from there. That's really your husband. Come on, I'll go there if you don't believe me."

I doubt yu Marsiyah's words. Because, yesterday Mas Roni showed sms from Rina. His sister reported that my in-laws had a stroke and were being treated in hospital. When I wanted to come, Mas Roni banned on the grounds that Keynara would be exhausted. It's a pity to be invited to travel far. Not to mention Key has to go to school. If you don't go in a long time, you're afraid of missing a lesson.

I asked Roni to leave early in the morning, before the sun began to sting. Even last night I owed it to the sewing boss for the cost of visiting his mother. Understandably, Mas Roni's money has run out for the cost of daily meals.

9 p.m, Keynara was already sleeping in my mother's room. Finally, I accepted Yu Marsiyah's invitation. I took a jacket to protect myself from the cold. After zuhur the rain poured until entering ashar time. January is the peak of the rainy season. The people in my place said, January is the same as the daily rain.

Yu Marsiyah piggybacked on me with her bike. On the way we did not talk because of the noise of passing vehicles. I don't really think about Yu Marsiyah's statement, I'm sure she's the wrong person.

Ten minutes later, we arrived at Waru village's house. There were more than ten motorcycles parked in his yard. Not until I came down, Mr. Bayan who was standing in the doorway had already pointed his finger at me.

"Well, that's his wife. Look at your husband's behavior, Til. I left training jaranan in Lombok Village, your husband cheated with my wife. The two of them made out when I was in the room. Savage your husband, Til!"

"Calm down first, sir. Calm down," Yu Marsiyah said.

Me and Mr. Roni know Mr. Bayan's family well. He has a underwear convection business. I used to take stitches there. Mr. Bayan's words made me start to believe in Yu Marsiyah's words earlier. Regardless of the people who were crowding in front of Pak Lurah's house, I walked in in orderly steps. Want to ascertain the truth of who the man who is at the center of the commotion.

In Mr. Lurah's living room, there is a wooden table surrounded by wicker wicker chairs. Some guys are sitting there. I don't know them, but the faces are no strangers, maybe we've been on the road because the distance of the village is close. On the chair that turned his back to the door sat a long-haired man and woman who had not seen his face.

I'm getting closer, Mr. Waru village lurah stands up. My heart beat fast when I saw a mole under the ear of the man sitting behind the door. The man looked up. Seeing his face my head was like being stung by an electric flow. The world feels like it's spinning.

"Roni."

The woman sitting next to him looked up as well. His eyes were red and swollen. I wanted to throw millions of insults, but all the words were swallowed back with my spit. Nora Candrawati, Mr. Bayan's wife who was Mas Roni's affair was much older than me. However, because of the many treasures he is able to look fashionable.

I was silent, like a defeated soldier before the war. It hurts me to forgive Roni. Trust and relationships to me are like glasses. Said my late father, glass means that if it has broken can not be repaired. After all, living with Mas Roni never gave me abundance. His wages as a casual worker are sometimes enough, sometimes not to meet daily needs.

Before changing my mind and bringing the devil back into my house, this step I stopped. I flipped over facing the living room table.

"Our marriage ended along with my footsteps leaving this house. My clothes will be packed into Ngawi. So, there's no need to set foot in my house anymore."

Roni was stunned. His cheeks were swollen, probably Mr. Bayan's former punch. I turned around and ran outside. Yu Marsiyah tried to stop me.

"Are you sure, Til? Think of it with a cool head."

"I can't, Yu. Give money is not enough, dare to cheat again. What do I think I am, Yu? It's better to live alone raising my child."

Yu Marsiyah was silent. He turned on the bike and took me home.

Arriving home, my mother welcomed me. He looked astonished to see me out nights with Yu Marsiyah. Before mom asked, I told her everything.

"Don't be rash in asking for separation, son. Think about it first. Maybe Roni is on the go. Pity your son. Don't be hard into people," said My Mother.

"This is my life, Mom. I'm the one who's living. My mother wished me well. Already, Mak. Cantile comes in first. Take care of the crazy man's clothes."

I immediately rushed into the house.

I opened the closet that stood next to the TV. Roni's clothes are on the top shelf. All the contents of that shelf I threw on the floor. Anger is as strong as I can be. The tears didn't fall at all, but my muscles felt very stiff. Want to punch, want to punch.

Yu Marsiyah's motor voice sounded away.

"Let me send you to the expedition all these clothes tomorrow, Mak," I said.

"Calm down, son. Everything can be talked about well. After all, the cost of divorce is not small."

"I'm going to sell a sewing machine for the cost of a divorce, Mom. That's a big machine. The conditions are still smooth. It could sell for two million more."

Keynara went out of his room. The 10-year-old boy rubbed both eyes.

"Why was your shirt taken out, Mom? Which father?"

Hearing the boy's question, the tears that had survived in his place, finally escaped as well. I scattered hugging him.

"I'm not coming home, son. We now live with the same three Mbah yes, son. Never ask your father again. Mom will work hard so that Key can sing school as soon as possible."

I felt the boy nodding in my arms.

***