281. Of gods, convictions and a little promise

Cassandra Pendragon

"Fascinating as your tale might be," I said, "what's your point?" He smiled crookedly.

"I'm getting there. Just imagine for a second how you'd have reacted, if you had found yourself in my shoes, when suddenly a creature of light and legend appeared on your doorstep, reducing one of your pawns to stardust and memories in the blink of an eye. And to top it all of, you even killed Captain Dawn and openly supported the Queen of the Night. I was convinced the two of them were keeping each other in check, ensuring a treacherous balance that kept us mere humans alive. Once you destroyed it… I wasn't willing to go back to the way things had been all those years ago and I acted. It wasn't hard to convince Brightblaze to help out. You already called her brave… she is more than that, she's zealous. All I had to do was point her in a direction." He sighed deeply, ogling the half empty bottle of wine. I pushed it towards him and he gulped it down like it was water.

"I didn't know that I had been played all along, though. Unknowingly I caused enough chaos for Amon to move. The church of the Broken Wheel is almost finished, the priests are dead or worse, their souls consumed in the ritual. Half of the Captains are gone and our fleet has been reduced to splinters. Now, I'm not arrogant enough to claim all of it is my doing, but I helped. A lot. Had I not been blinded by my fears, by my hatred, I might have considered talking to Alassara beforehand. Who knows how things might have turned out?" I remained silent, pondering his words, until Ahri asked:

"That's recent. The merchants came to Boseiju years ago. In all that time, you never, not even once, became suspicious of what might be going on behind your back?" He chuckled quietly. 

"It almost sounds like you believe me. Of course a few things cropped up, but they never seemed important enough to deal with. There are a few hundred followers of the Broken Wheel all around Free Land and there were close to fifty priests and acolytes involved. I always knew some of them were pursuing their own agendas, but I never expected them to be working towards…" he gestured vaguely, indicating the devastation last night had caused.

"Also… you're royalty but, as far as I've come to understand your past, you've never really had to lead people. I'm not talking about a small group of friends but tens, hundreds of men who don't really share anything but a common goal. It's different. You can't be everywhere at once, so you delegate, you put in place a structure and as long as it works, you stay well away from it. Which brings us to what I think happened. I don't know for sure, but given a bit of time, I might be able to squeeze the truth from some of the survivors. Anyways, it's not just the church of the Broken Wheel… you've been there, Ahri, haven't you? Blackthorne's pet alchemist was involved as well. Considering the Captain himself is a head shorter by now, I don't think he knew anything, but the snake he nurtured for years has finally shown its fangs." He rubbed the crown of his head tiredly.

"Most of what I'm going to tell you already know, but it scared the living hells out of me. When…" he was cut short when the raven on his shoulder suddenly moved. With a flap of its wings, it jumped from its perch, a black mist obscuring its figure for a moment.

A young boy, maybe eight or ten summers old, with pitch black eyes and long white hair, landed lightly between us. A loose robe fluttered around his ankles and despite his rather cute appearance I felt a chill creeping down my spine when our eyes locked. 

"It's a pleasure to meet you in the flesh, Cassandra," he said, his voice cold and distant, like a frozen river in the night. He inclined his head in my direction and even offered Ahri his hand, a curtesy he didn't extend to me. She took it hesitantly, glancing at me for reassurance. "And your lovely bride, of course. I feel like I owe you an apology. Our last two encounters were…"

"A fiasco," I cut in. "I don't want to dwell on the past, otherwise I might be tempted to continue where we left off." Nightshade hissed in surprise, my indifferent tone and the almost respectful way the boy talked to me catching him off guard. I ignored him completely. "I assume you've used the last hours to ensure you won't be used as a godly dynamo again?" The boy chuckled, sitting down at Ahri's side, almost as if he was using her as a buffer between us.

"It's not an easy task but I've started sifting through dreams and memories. I didn't appreciate being captured, a travesty facilitated by my own children. While I can't say that I've gotten to the bottom of this mess, I've surely stumbled across a few intriguing pieces of the puzzle. Would you like to hear them?" I snorted, wishing the bottle hadn't been empty.

"No, I actually simply came here to enjoy the lovely sunset." To my surprise, he smiled.

"I don't know anyone who'd dare talk to me like that. It's refreshing. Well then, before I strain your decidedly short temper even more, here's what I've found out." He paused, swallowing visibly.

"I don't often interact with mortals. I listen to prayers and sometimes nudge the world into a more convenient path, but I don't show myself, I usually can't. Even now, if it weren't for the presence of the two of you, I wouldn't be able to manifest a body. Your presence skews or even shatters most laws around you, giving me a bit of leeway… it doesn't really matter, suffice it to say, I've never directly interacted with my followers…"

"He impersonated you," I breathed, adding two and two together. He nodded slowly.

"For someone as powerful as Amon, it's a piece of cake to flit in and out of dreams and pretend to be something else, even from far away. For years, some of my followers received revelation after revelation, only… they weren't mine." I closed my eyes, the ramifications felt like an actual weight settling onto my shoulders. If it had happened to him, then…

"The worst part, I can't be sure how many priests, acolytes and believers of different faiths have been tricked the very same way. For all I know, every church in Free Land, nay, every church on the islands could as well have become a cesspool of the Emperor's influence. Even now, chances are that some of the people over there," he gesticulated towards the entrance of the harbour, "are following a holy mission, implanted by a vile creature from another continent."

"Damn it all," I groused, "I knew there was a reason why I've never seen the appeal of religion. Blind faith is fucking dangerous and now we have to deal with a bunch of idiots on a holy mission. Better yet, if what you say is true, every single person who puts their trust in a god, or even an idea, can become an enemy over night." I glanced at Nightshade and asked: "what is with humans and their need to place their responsibility on someone else's shoulder? If I had a dream of a strange being telling me what's right and wrong, I'd be pissed at best and murderously enraged at worst." He laughed dryly.

"I don't think you could even understand. You've seen so much… you know so much… and even you feel insecure, from time to time, don't you?"

"Of course I do, but that only means I have to try harder."

"Sure, but it's so much easier to simply… let it all slip away, let someone else decide. If it goes downhill, you're not at fault."

"That's not religion, that's a death sentence." I replied heatedly. "I don't know how often I had this discussion, but you can't live, hiding in the shadows." I exhaled deeply, trying to calm my mind. "I remember different cultures, different religions and the only ones that can, if understood correctly, enrich a person's life are the ones where gods don't take away your choices. As long as you still have to decide for yourself how you're going to live your life without the actual threat of heavenly retribution, without an almighty father who punishes you, you can still grow. Those religions show you a door, they don't make you step through." Ahri cleared her throat and wrapped her tails around my waist tightly to shut me up.

"I know you're just warming up, but that's hardly the point, now, is it?" I bit my tongue and swallowed the flood of remarks spinning through my mind. 

"What's the point, then," I asked grudgingly.

"Why," she stated simply. "Why the church of the Broken Wheel? Think… even you, if you could be spelled, could have been taken in. Imagine Amon had access to your memories, to your desires, your most guarded secrets, because that's what invading a dream means… in your case, or in mine, he could simply construct a memory, disguise his schemes as a plea I, or rather Aurora, made you listen to in the past. If done slowly and carefully enough, you'd be eating out of his hand in no time, wouldn't you?"

"Probably," I admitted slowly. 

"Which means he could pretty much turn anyone he desires to, if he's willing to put in the time and effort. Now, why would he focus on this particular church? You're right, blind faith would make it much easier to manipulate true believers but it still doesn't explain why it's only the Broken Wheel, which has been targeted,"

"I'm right here, you know," the boy piped up grumpily, "and who says it's only been my following? We only know about the traitors in my church, doesn't mean there aren't more, somewhere else."

"Great, just friggin great," I mumbled. "So, now what? We can't even try to figure out who's been turned and who hasn't. There's no lasting magic involved, no mark… I still think churches are the most likely target." I raised my hand to keep Ahri from interrupting. "You're right, it doesn't have to be that way, but it's not that easy to convince someone with self asserted morals to suddenly do anything overly crazy. It'd take much more effort to mould them into a functioning tool. Why bother when there are already more than enough people lining up, who are practically waiting on tenterhooks to do their patrons bidding, whether it's fake or not. No… it'd be a waste of time to go fishing someplace else, when there's already a well stocked pond right in front of you. Amon wouldn't squander his resources."

"Unless he expects us to follow your line of reasoning," the vixen said darkly.

"There's that," I admitted hesitantly. "But either way, I haven't got the foggiest how we could possibly try to fight against a subversive idea, an implanted desire…" I paused, an idea forming in the back of my mind but before I could fully wrap my head around it, the youngster said nonchalantly:

"A cleansing. Burn it all down and allow something new, something stronger to grow from the ashes." Appalled I hissed:

"They're your people as well for god's sake! I'm not going to let you burn a forest of innocents, just so you can prune the few infected trees." He smirked and opened his mouth only to shut it again immediately after with a decidedly sheepish look on his face. Wise move. Something along the lines of what are you going to do to stop me might have resulted in the first beating he had received in centuries.

"What then," he asked aggressively. "Tell me then, oh wise one, what we can do."

"Tell the truth," Ahri stated calmly. "It can become their armour. If everyone knows who Amon really is and what he is capable of, it will become all the harder for him to play his games."

"You put quite a lot of faith in the people of Free Land," Nightshade commented. "In my experience, your trust isn't necessarily justified. I'm not going to blame them, I've been there myself, but once you hit rock bottom there isn't much you wouldn't do for a better life. As the saying goes morals are expensive. You have to be able to afford them." (Author's remark: it's the first time I'm actually explaining a quote but this one is taken from a fragmented drama called Woyzeck by Georg Büchner. It's about 40 pages. If you find the half hour to spare, you won't regret the investment. It's not an easy read, though.)

I snorted derisively. "And who's fault is that? You and your fellow captains have shaped a society where crime is tolerated, even endorsed. And now we're all at risk because you felt entitled to squeeze the last ounce of gold from the still warm bodies of your people." He spread his fingers wide and closed them into fists again. Shrugging, he replied:

"I won't deny it but there isn't much we can do, is there? We have to play the hand we've been dealt. Should I, by some miracle, still have some power, once this all blows over, I'll be more than happy to listen to any suggestions you might have but until then…"

"I should can it. I know…" I took a deep breath and exhaled through my nose. "There isn't much we can do tonight, anyways. We'll have to wait and see what the lot of them," I jerked my head towards the square, "come up with. It's hard to figure something out when we don't even know who'll be in charge."

"You're not gong to stake a claim," the disguised raven wanted to know. I shook my head.

"I neither have the ambition nor the time to get involved in politics. I won't be staying for much longer, anyways."

"You're leaving us in this mess," Nightshade erupted but he couldn't quite meet my eyes when I frowned. It was hard to tell, but I even thought he was blushing.

"First of all, while I may have forced the matter, the mess is yours, not mine. Second, do you really believe your small island kingdom is the only one in peril? You've seen the scale of his power. His ambition isn't to subjugate some rundown pirate village. He's here for our world and… me. Trust me, even if I could, you wouldn't want me to stick around. It would only get worse. Once I'm gone, you can be sure your little paradise won't be the focus of his attention anymore."

"That's not," he stammered, "I'm not…"

"What my aphasic friend is trying to say," the not so almighty god intervened, "is this: we need help. I can't provide it, even this manifestation is almost more than I can handle and I'm already utilising the disturbances you two cause. Are you really going to forsake them… to forsake us?"

"Of course not," I sighed, "I've friends here, even though they might not be alive, strictly speaking. Just because I won't be living here, doesn't mean I'll be far away. We can travel pretty fast, if the need arises. Also, I truly believe you've already got everything you need, right in front of your nose. The only question is whether or not you're capable of putting aside your prejudice and pride and actually share your power with the ones you've always pushed to the side. Damn it, you've got a vampire queen in your midst who has lost most of her… children. Allow her to do what she has always done form the shadows. Protect her home. Turn your slaves into willing subjects, shatter their shackles and within a few days the most prominent source of Amon's power will be yours. And, for the love of god, limit the power the churches hold. It might take a while but I'm convinced this place could become something… more than a cesspool of depravity."

"And if he returns," Nightshade asked with a barely suppressed tremor in his voice. I shared a look with Ahri and she replied for the both of us:

"Wherever he appears, we won't be far behind. This much, I can promise."