406. Of anger, limits and a little resurrection

Cassandra Pendragon

I knew that the boy had woken up, only feigning unconsciousness. I heard his hammering heart beat and smelled his sweat after all, but I didn't care. Listening in might yet do him some good and it'd save me a whole plethora of boring explanations further down the line.

My eyes roamed over the towering tree and the tiny cave, hidden underneath its roots, towards the milky white, cloudy sky, winking at me through bare, skeletal branches. When I breathed in the scent of snow and electricity tickled my nose. Another storm was brewing, but we wouldn't stick around long enough to witness its glory. Time was precious, even more so than I had thought. 

The world was changing and it'd do so for about a year. Afterwards… I could already feel my last transformation burning in my core, its eagerness to finally become whole almost overwhelming. I wouldn't be able to keep it in check for longer than twelve months and even that was a generous estimate. Once I couldn't hold back the tide any longer… I'd change and my siblings were going to know. They were going to come for us, for Gaya, and the immortal war would resume.

A year… I had thought I'd have to try and unite our peoples to have a chance to fight against Amon. As it turned out what I had done was only the first step needed to protect Gaya's hope. I had been handed the tools, Greta's tree was growing and once fully matured it would turn into a bastion against my siblings, but it was going to fall on me and mine to ensure that this safe haven wouldn't be empty when the time came. That something would be able to escape the eternal flames that would devour our future. At least I wouldn't have to visit every realm to spread the message. Oh no, our distant relatives were coming all on their lonesome. Without an invitation. Goddamn it, was there no respite? 

Sighing I leaned against the coarse bark of an old weeping willow, the cold, rough touch an anchor that kept me grounded, prevented my imagination from running wild. I crossed my arms and listened to the breath of the forest, to the slow rhythm of hibernation and the trickling snow, but Ahri and Lilith didn't speak, they waited patiently for me to resume my story. What I had experienced in the sealed realm was difficult to put into words and I didn't even know where to begin. I had already told them how I had managed to break the circle. Afterwards…

"Light. Light and fury and pain. For me and for Gabriel. Immeasurable knowledge and skill clashed with unbridled power and stubbornness. From afar, if there had been any bystander capable of watching our battle, it would have looked like creation going to war with itself. Matter, reality, the very bounds of the realm shook and trembled whenever we moved. She meant to freeze me, to hold me down long enough for her to take over Reia's soul and I… I intended to burn her, to reduce her to something my sister would be able to deal with.

For both of us the stakes were much higher than our lives. For her it was an escape either way, a path out of the darkness she had chosen and I had pushed her into, and for me it was a baptism of spilled blood and ice cold flames. I had weighed my life against Reia's and I had found it wanting. I wouldn't retreat, Gabriel would have to kill me to get to her prize. Death had come calling with an immortal at her side, but I wouldn't run. The bone wrenching dread Amazeroth's revelations had left behind had come with a gift. Whatever I'd have to do, whatever depravity I would have to wallow in, I knew I had already lived through worse, I knew I had already committed graver atrocities. If I couldn't use my nature to protect what I loved I wouldn't have the right to exist. I wasn't afraid, I wasn't even angry. I was empty except for the burning tide of power within me that crested higher with every passing, frozen moment.

The last embers of the circle vanished into my wings, stoking the flames. The ocean boiled and evaporated. The ground, the mountain that had been her prison vanished. My tails twitched with bloodlust and burning slobber dripped from my silver maw. A howl, eerie and lasting, tore from my throat and I moved, or maybe the realm around me did. Gabriel's eyes widened when I appeared before her, a towering shadow, a living reminder of who had shaken the walls of the Silver City, of who had made her creations falter and break before. A young immortal I might have been but the legacy in my blood spanned the realms of angels and demons and I wouldn't be denied. Not today. Not again. For the first time in my life an immortal was threatening my family, was threatening you and Reia. For the first time in my life the power within me was truly challenged and it… and I rejoiced.

I uttered a single word, the last discernible syllables this realm would ever hear: "begone." Reia's body vanished in a shower of sparks and my feline face morphed into a cruel, wolfish grin. Gabriel's wings immediately grew to the size of worlds. Gargantuan, skeletal, rotting, ugly things that promised death and decay enveloped me like the mockery of an embrace but they couldn't touch me. Silver flames wreathed themselves around me like a gown and thick, black, deadly smoke veiled us in the ashes of her magic. My body twitched, my mind expanded and a flash of Mephisto's magic blew away the poisonous, sky like cloud. I was still caged by her perverted wings, but my coat immediately rippled and massive, glowing sheets of mithril appeared along my limbs, sparkling with dwarven runes. Aiglos' light pierced the darkness, its thin, elegant form twisting until it resembled beautiful, silver talons. They shimmered and vanished, my paws shining with its strength. Then I struck.

I had thought I knew the limits of magic and power. I had been wrong. Sparks erupted along her wings, each one carrying with it the will and the strength to devour a galaxy. My senses collapsed, I tasted the path of destruction my energy cleaved through the darkness, I heard her blood spill from the cut, I smelled her widening eyes and I felt her fear… her fear and her happiness. I saw white and silver and blue, waves of power that tore creation asunder. The realm shook, the first of my seals evaporated and we were both flung backwards, her severed wing turning into pristine, beautiful ice crystals before it vanished into memories, racing after Reia on an invisible path. Then she changed.

She became an endless, formless maelstrom, dripping transcendent ice like slobber, and everything froze. Liquid cold flooded the dark void and drowned me in an ocean of infinite might. I snarled and spread my wings. A tiny bubble of raging silver and blue danced around me, at first almost invisible among the frothing tide, but then it grew. It grew and its fury knew no bounds.

Like an explosion underwater the suffocating pressure was blown away, her magic turned into shimmering motes of crystallised light and I inhaled deeply. A torrent of power surged through my veins as faint, complex sigils began to appear on my armour. Blue and white they glowed, a living reminder of what had once been, and when I released my breath a torrent of immaculate snow danced around me, slowly transforming into another layer of unyielding protection.

I raised my head, my eyes aglow, my wolfish smile unwavering. Hiding, she was hiding amongst the darkness she had called, fervently erecting flimsy walls to keep my jaws away from her. I tensed, my wings collapsed into a pointed formation, resembling Aiglos' tip, and with a thought I flung myself forward like a living, breathing spear. Another seal shattered, another tremor claimed the empty space we were stuck in and reality fractured. Our battle was beginning and ending at the same time, the nicely ordered rules of creation blown to smithereens. 

My flames claimed the bleeding, battered, flayed body of a fallen angel, the remains of her essence chasing after the only fulcrum they had left: the tiny piece within Reia. Death's touch became real as sharp, ice cold bone splitters dug through my flesh, Gabriel's remaining wing buried deep in my stomach. Liquid ice and fire dripped from the wound, her magic scraping over my core. Our surroundings changed as a million stars roared to life around me, made real by her transcendent will. They collapsed and the pressure of a galaxy bore down on me, threatening to grind me into dust, but with a defiant bark I filled the ravenous hole they had become and light erupted. My wings tore through her form and I threw her off, the pain nothing but fuel for the flames. Then I reached her.

The arcane bastions she had forged parted around my wings like water as the laws of creation reasserted themselves, only to be entirely devoured the very next instant when we touched. The third seal I had cast all those aeons ago broke and magic ran rampant, unshackled and free as it had been before the beginning. We changed. Our ambitions, our determination became as inconsequential as a grain of rice, because there was nothing left to define them. There was only her and me and we could only be what the other saw in us. Reia, my family, even you, Ahri, none of you mattered anymore. There was only an obstacle in front of me, one I'd devour and spit back out again as I had done so often before. It was time to remind my sister how I had earned my name and with that thought our fight began in earnest.

There was no goal, no paltry distractions like pain or purpose. There was only us, locked in an eternal dance, for even the time stream had withered. The seventh realm truly had ceased to exist, the power unleashed within too much for even my seals to handle. In a way we were fighting on the cusp of a memory made real through our magic. Otherwise there would have been nothing left to return to. For either of us.

What came next… concepts only gain meaning in contrast to something else. What was and what was not were the same but yet divided. Everything was in flux, similar to a pretty famous cat named after one of her two inventors: Schrödinger. You might remember, Ahri. Consequentially every description I can come up with is nothing but a measly metaphor, trying to put something into words that defies all but the heavenly language. I'll still try, though, if you're willing to listen.

Gabriel was immeasurably older than me, her will bolstered by uncounted aeons she had actually lived through. Lived through and suffered. And I… I am powerful.

I couldn't compete with her understanding nor her intent but there was… there is a weight to my existence that she didn't possess. Just like light slowly melts ice her magic… her being, her will vanished under my touch, even though she was an iceberg and I but small candle. But when we clashed she couldn't extinguish my flame. Gradually something changed as my power claimed hers and the concepts I understand began to matter again.

Blood and pain and battle I'm familiar with so that's what I saw. For her… I do not know and since she's gone we'll never find out, but it couldn't have been pretty. To me she was a terrifying monster of ice and snow and water. Colder than the Void, larger than life. Like a hydra she towered over me, ancient memories turned into salivating heads dripping deadly intent like venomous blood. It would have been quite fitting, if it had been real, since we went to war a wyrm and a dragon, mirroring the battle for supremacies among mortal races." For the first time I paused and added with a pinched smile: "believe it or not, kitsune aren't the apex predators of creation, even though we can look the part.

What followed was torture, plain and simple. For me and for her. I… physical pain and I are old friends and even though she tore into me with everything she had the agony of a crushed limb couldn't make me flinch. The memories, though… she didn't only ravage my body, her thoughts poisoned me as well with a concoction of my own making. Loneliness and heights. It makes no sense but apparently I'm friggin terrified of heights. Mostly I don't allow my fears to take hold, but when they do… it doesn't matter. I… fell and she fell with me. Through times long gone. 

We bit, we scratched… there was no thought of spells or technique. It was raw and bloody. Her ice enveloped me, suffocated me and in return I took her eyes, plunged my claws deep into her skull until I felt cold blood flow and sharp crystals break and shatter. The wounds we sustained… when it comes down to it, our bodies are constructs of will and magic. Hurting us means destroying… corrupting what we are. It means devouring whatever makes us unique. Our past, our future… maybe our destiny. I'm not sure. But it always comes at a price.

Every instant, every moment I took from her, I tore from her mind like an enraged animal, I had to pay for. I… became her and I was alone and hurting in the dark and cold, imprisoned behind eternal magic I just couldn't break. I wept and cursed with her as the universe changed and I remained bound, bound to an empty, desolate wasteland at the end of existence. I… she had lost her mind in her prison and I felt my own thoughts wavering. The onslaught was… just not enough.

Every second I suffered with her I made my own. Piece by little piece light flooded the darkness and finally our fall came to an end. Her… hatred of me had vanished, had turned into starlight, and with it the largest part of her will had withered. What remained… was closer to an animal than an angel. She was frightened. She heard death's beckoning calls as her very essence bled through the gashes I had torn and her fear gave her strength. In her last moments she fought for survival, even though she detested her life, and I barely found the strength to continue.

I'd have let her go if it hadn't been for Reia. She was already bound to the girl. Energy can't be destroyed. Everything I had taken I had already returned to my little sister. I… I turned Reia into an immortal without a past. A blank slate… well, mostly. Judging from her magic more of Gabriel might have survived than I had thought. But it was enough. I wasn't able to sever the connection Gabriel had created but I managed to ensure that it was my little sister who opened her eyes, not someone I could barely call kin anymore. To that end… I waded through a sea of blood and regret.

She was already beaten but I couldn't let her go and I couldn't even grant her a swift end. If I had devoured her completely, Reia wouldn't have had the strength to survive her rebirth. I had to… flay her alive, to take every last ounce of what she was and burn it into oblivion to feed the slob to my sister. It made me feel dirty, but Gabriel had chosen her own path. There was no other way, it was her or Reia." A silver tear ran down my cheek, but I immediately brushed it away.

With a cynical chuckle I added: "the stupid angel could have picked anyone but her or you Ahri and chances are she would have walked out of there with a new body, a new soul… a new life. Slightly singed, but alive. Or maybe not. Again… I'm not sure, but it doesn't matter either way. What's done is done. Gabriel is gone and with her are her secrets and her treasures. It doesn't bode well for the future, that she has apparently used the merfolk to further her own agenda. With her death there's no telling what they might do and right now the last thing we need is an invasion from the deep, blue sea. That's my story and now, pray tell, what have I missed? How long was I even gone? And where in hell did you come from Lilith, and where's your actual body?"

Ahri's hot flames comfortingly caressed my cheek, her fires tempered with compassion. Ever since I had started talking she had never broken our physical contact. Not even for a moment. "I imagine what I've got to say is much less troublesome than your story, Lilith," she finally mumbled. "A day, Cassy. You were gone for a day. I… Viyara your mom and I were devastated. Your brothers and Erya made sure we didn't try something stupid. They kept us busy, in a way."