My plan or God's plan. .

I really don't know what's going on with my life right now. I have entrusted it all to God already but sometimes i tend to doubt. I have seen, read and heared many answers to my prayers but i am not so sure. I know that the will of God is more better than mine and i was not able to follow his will. I was wrong before because God wanted to get Jayson out of my life but still i wanted to hold on to him and force him to change. I saw a post, "Choose, the easy way or the painful way? Renew your mind and think of how many years you humble and suffer for him. I have a plan for you and I have a plan for him. What would you choose, my plan or your plan?" I know it was God and he wanted me to let go and don't live in immorality but still i chose my own will. I really regret for my decision before and i already repented about it so much. I prayed and cried out to God, "Lord God, i'm sorry if i made a wrong decision. Please forgive me still Lord. Please gave me and Jayson a chance like you have given me." Then i saw a video popped and played, "It's your choice and i have given you freedom to choose. I know you made the wrong decision. You limit the plans for my life to you. My plans are not your plans and your thoughts differ from my thoughts. Let go now of your regrets because i will open a new door for you." Jayson and i decided to get married rather than living in immorality because this is the great sin i am always condemning myself with. We plan for a simple wedding within this year in 2022. I don't have a white dress and i went to a thrift shop after our Mid week service. I asked God in my mind, "My God i hope i can see a white wedding dress." After a while i found an elegant white dress for only fifty pesos. I bought it already and i like it so much! It's okay for me to have a simple wedding the important is that i choose and marry the man i love. I asked myself again and again if this is okay with God or not. I prayed and open my Bible and read there that i should stay away from immorality and that i should be clean and holy in front of God. I am always doubting about my decision because maybe i will regret it again. Should i marry or not? Until i saw a message appeared, "My child, I will give you a clear answer today." The pastor's sermon was about the spirit of doubt and the spirit of fear. I cried so much after it and we prayed about it and rebuke it. I realized that when you have a relationship with God you are always needing Him. We must include Him in our plans. We wanted to change ourselves, our situations, our status and more but it starts with our own. We need to move and make a decision!

On friday noon we went to Minglanilla municipal hall and get the requirements for our wedding. We're glad we made it and already scheduled for a seminar. The certificate of no marriage record will arrive for one month in the end of September as well as the seminar so we planned for our wedding to be on October. After that, we went to church because we have many activities to do there. When we ride on the jeep i saw a message appeared, "Wait and be patient in my right time." I know it is for me because i was thinking that the process for our wedding for two months takes too long. When we arrived to church, we bought some burgers and ice cream for them. We ate there together with my pastor and his family then brother Roger and sister Elyn came too with their one and only child. After our prayer devotion we went for one on one evangelism in a crowded barrio. We met an old man sitting outside near the path way and we shared the word of God to him. He was willing to listen and we all prayed for him. We all repent, accept Jesus and layed our hands to his paralyzed arm. We are so pity because he shared to us that he had a stroke before and his wife left him. They had only one child at our age but now brought to jail because of drug case. He didn't know what to do until he met a group of people who also shared and prayed for him like we did. He started to know Jesus and read the bible. He became prayerful to God and for others and he noticed that God healed him constantly. God gave him someone too and it was a man to be his help. He was a homeless guy named Joel and he's just asking people for food. We gave him money to buy for food and we told him that we will open a bible study for him. He approved our request and we will come back for him next week. We continued walking and we also encounter a widow. She had 9 kids and we also did the same thing sharing and praying. We met more people there and they were glad to meet us. We invited all of them for a bible study and go to church on Sundays. After our one on one evangelism we went back to church again walking. We asked our pastor for a bible study in our house on Saturday night and he approved it. Jayson and I are excited for our first bible study. We went to a public market in Naga spreading and reaching out again to all people. Sharing the gospel of salvation and Jesus Christ in our lives. We were all on fire that night even though we felt tired already from walking. I know that God will work with our plans and his plans. In His time and in the future i know that His mighty hand will save and work in people's heart and lives. He promised that our work for the Him will never be in vain and i am really holding on to His promises! It's so happy and worthy to work for the Lord! ❤➕❤