Annoyingly confusing

Becca left the mansion after two days and stayed in a hotel in Manhattan since her husband planned a dinner date which the woman didn't want to attend to. I told her that it's a good way to talk about each other and their relationship. I am here for her and she knows that, but not as a partner in life but her best friend, her sex buddy, and that's just it. Becca smiled but I saw her melancholy eyes sought to find something in mine, but she couldn't find love but pity and friendship which made her look away, but still kissed me on the mouth and embraced me tightly. I will see you again!, I asked and Becca smiled at me like she's meant it but I think this is her way of saying goodbye to me. After ten years of having sex and talking I kind of gotten used to her at my side and I would miss her. I can't help it but I would hurt her more if we continue playing around and using each other as an excuse to feel happy or content which aren't really true, since we both know that we didn't need each other for love but for sex, and only that.

Becca said she loves me and this time it's the truth while she's hugging me tightly, like she didn't want to let me go. Then, if you di, stay, be with me, yet, I still couldn't give you what you need, love, since....I love Lei.....Becca interrupted me and almost puked when I said Leila's name. She got mad and didn't want to think about it anymore. I know that lucky woman Leila. Her again. I can't compete with someone from the past and now that she's here, with you, I can never win your heart, now more than ever. Maybe in another lifetime, huh!, Becca said with her kisses so deep it pricked my heart and I felt hurt for my best friend leaving me. Wait Becca, please! Don't be hard on yourself, it's not your fault!, I cried holding her arm and touching her cheek which she kissed while closing her eyes like reminiscing the times we shared together.

Yes, it is my fault for letting my heart fall for someone I couldn't have from the beginning! See you around Sasa, Becca replied tears falling down from her eyes. She released my hand and ran to the car waiting for her, then drove off without looking back at me.

I wanted to say that I love her too but it might confuse our situation when in fact, I truly love her and Leila. But choosing between them might be hard. Maybe Becca felt it too that she gave me away to be happy with Leila.

It's been two years and I visited Leila in the hospital during weekends but not really engaging in conversations just with Lillian so I won't meddle with her progress. The doctors say that she has improved and keeps on improving. Leila is more responsive and more comfortable with her new eyes and legs. She can work faster now and can do her own shopping of course with Lillian accompanying her in town.

I wanted to see her since I have been missing her smile and company, so I sneaked to her room one time. Since her bedroom door is open I managed to go in without Lillian stopping me with little chats. I looked around and saw a picture where Leila and I were still teenagers. I remember it when we were at a party and we kissed that night that led one thing to another. I smiled, that was a good night. Lillian, can you buy me some....ahhhhh, Marissa, Sasa? Ahh! Oh! my!....Leila said when she saw me. I turned around to look at her and was shocked to see that she is naked with the towel flipped covering her hair and not her body. Hmm...she still has that beautiful and sexy body....with a more sturdy and hot legs...ahhhhh! Sorry, I should've knocked first! I just wanted to see you and how you're progressing. And since you are looking hot...ah....great! I think you're preoccupied now, so I'll visit you some other time!, I added looking away so I couldn't see her body.

But Leila came over me and stood right in front of me, at about three inches, raising her hands to hold my cheeks and turned it to face her. It's okay, Sasa, I am okay with that. I am okay with you doing this too!, Leila said reaching for my hand and placing it on her breast. It's so soft and I couldn't fix my eyes to look at her directly. Yeah, me saying almost all of the time that I will own her but here I am getting cold feet even just looking at Leila and her body. Oh, how I love to touch her breasts and her body, I missed it so much that I could eat and bite them....Ahhhh! but no! Not now....Leila is well, I shouldn't ruin it with my sexual desires and fantasies about her and us!

Sasa, I know you want me and I want you too! You can do whatever you want with me, besides I am your plaything now. Your girl toy, your robot, your successful experiment!, Leila replied ruining my desire and mood for a good sex. I stopped massaging her breast and closed my eyes so I couldn't slap her with insulting me.

Now you've done it again. Good job Leila!, Leila thought feeling stupid and crazy about Sasa who she really wanted to make love to now.

You're not my experiment nor my play thing! I can buy or hire girls or women for that. And I don't need a robot to please me, either. I just wanted to see how you're doing and now I can confirm that you're back to your old annoying self again, I want to strangle you right now for insulting me. I need to go talk to the doctors. I'll see you again next time when you're done hating me!, I said looking at Leila's eyes without twitching and slapped her with her own medicine.