Sappho of Lesbos

"…Fine. Icarus found out that I'm married," Beatrice said while playing with her nails.

"M-married? What? YOU WERE MARRIED?" Valentina shouted.

This was the first she was hearing of this. If she told the other girls, rivers upon rivers of tears would be shed.

Even Icarus who was Beatrice's official partner was nothing more than that.

An official partner.

But Beatrice had gone off and gotten married.

"What? How? But why? Who?"

Beatrice put on an extremely smug expression, "I married Dick Allcocks from Man-Island!"

She even puffed her chest out to express how proud she was.

But it was not the name that bothered Valentina most. Well, yes, she was obviously very alarmed by the name, but-

"You married a man?" she asked in disbelief.

Beatrice who usually surrounded herself with beautiful women of all backgrounds and characters had gone off and married a man.

Valentina would more readily believe that Beatrice would die and get isekai-ed to a world of cultivation than believe that Beatrice would marry a man.

"Yup, sure did," Beatrice replied as if she wasn't sure about what she did wrong.

Beatrice sometimes seemed crazy, but there was always some twisted logic behind what she did.

It was that usually, her reasoning couldn't be understood, which was why she was regarded as a madwoman.

Valentina took a deep breath to regain herself.

Valentina was like a scientist.

She was going to deconstruct the mysterious phenomenon of Beatrice's logic, into small intelligible chunks.

She began her series of questions.

"Yes and no answers only," she said.

"Sure thing."

"Y-e-s and n-o answers only.

"…"

"…"

"Yes and –"

"Yes," Beatrice sighed.

"Did you marry a man?"

"Yes."

"Was Dick Allcocks from Man-Island his original name?"

"No."

"Did you make him change his name?"

"…Yes."

"Was that one of the conditions for getting to marry you?"

"…Yes" Beatrice smiled. It seemed like to her, it was a good memory.

"Do I know Dick Allcocks from Man-Island?"

"Yes."

"Fuck, seriously?" Valentina asked while scratching her head.

The movements of her arms made her breasts jiggle. Beatrice's eyes were in lock-on mode, eyeing the heavy mounds hungrily.

Beatrice was only answering in autopilot mode, while her main consciousness was enjoying the view.

"Yes."

"Is Dick Allcocks from Man-Island entitled to any of your wealth or connections?"

"No."

"Hmmm," Valentina took a while to think of her next question, "you can answer in full sentences now."

"Master has returned Bobby's speaking privileges, Bobby is free!" Beatrice replied while waving her arms about.

No one would believe that this was the same girl who was playing such majestic piano earlier.

Moreover, no one would believe that this chaotic girl ruled London's underworld through an iron fist.

Valentina knew that she was only getting to see this annoying side of Beatrice since Beatrice trusted her.

"Do you want your speaking privileges revoked again?" Valentina asked, taking on a tone of an angry parent.

"… Bobby is sorry."

"Damn right, you better be. Now tell me. Who is Dick Allcocks from Man-Island?"

"Oh, him. His old name is Stew, you know him"

"The guy who runs the fish and chips shop?!" Valentina shouted.

"That's the man. He's my dear hubby now," Beatrice replied while laughing to herself.

Valentina closed her eyes and took 5 deep breaths.

She would be one of the only people in the world who would willingly close her eyes in front of Aphrodite's incarnate.

Everyone else would refuse to even blink to soak in her ethereal beauty for just a moment longer.

But Valentina needed those 5 deep breaths, desperately needed them to control her emotions.

Anger, jealousy, irritation. It was mostly irritation.

She would need some good sex to relieve herself and she calmed down knowing that it was soon to come.

"Why would he marry you? Going as far as to legally change his name to do so? Wait, did he legally change his name?"

"He sure did," Beatrice said chuckling. She found the whole thing hilarious.

"He married me because I told him I would give him 100k if he did."

"… And you did?"

"My hubby deserves the best. 100k is nothing for the gag value."

"It's supposed to be 100k is nothing in comparison to your love. You're a married couple now. Anyways, what's up with the name?"

"I named my hubby after my role model's husband."

"And who is that?" Valentina asked, genuinely curious.

The role model of Beatrice was sure to be someone great or someone completely unexpected.

"My role model is Sappho of Lesbos, the Greek poet from whom we got the word 'lesbian'. She was famous for her numerous poems about her love for women."

"Didn't she kill herself due to her unrequited love for a man named Phaon?"

"I refuse to believe that my idol would do that," Beatrice replied immediately without even giving Valentina time to breathe.

"Anyways, her husband was supposedly 'Kerkylas of Andros' whose literal translation equates to 'Penis of Man'. I thought that I should follow in her footsteps," Beatrice said proudly.

Valentina rubbed her forehead in distress, but she suddenly realized something, she burst out in uncontrolled laughter.

"Hahahahaha!"

"What…"

"Hahahahaha!"

"What's so funny? Have you come to realize the greatness of Sappho too?"

"Haha. Ha~," she let out a long breath.

"So, I'm assuming that 'Dick' is his first name, 'Allcocks' and 'from' are middle names."

"Yes…..!?" Beatrice's eyes opened wide in disbelief.

She had come to realise the same thing that Valentina had come to realise.

"Beatrice Man-Island, what an elegant name. It suits you, my love. Hahahaha!"

Beatrice's face immediately wrinkled in displeasure.

"Fuck…"