Camp Crush

I looked forward to going to OLVC every year, mainly because I couldn't wait to see all my old friends again and get out of my town. Camp was the one place that anyone can be who ever they want to be and no one objects because they did not know you before this week. It was my safe space. I registered myself in at the table in front of the mess hall and went to my new cabin called St Peter. The mess hall is the place where we all gather and eat, but also since we are going to a Christians camp we say grace and live in cabins named after saints. It was a nice way to come together and make new friends while growing in faith together. I got my bed ready in my cabin and walked out the door looking for someone I could talk to. Finding my friend Rowan, we talked for an hour while everyone was registering and making themselves comfortable.

Waiting for the bell to ring felt like forever as I scanned the fields trying to find some people I knew, I could kid myself but really I was only trying to find one boy in particular. Chris. He was the one person I could not wait to see and also the one that I never wanted to see in my life again. Last year he had been so confusing with his feelings and I will admit I would never call myself a popular kid but that still did not give him the right to say he wanted to date me but was scared if others found out. I was 15 at the time and had a crush on him since I was 10, there was no way that I was going to pass up an opportunity to be with him. Looking back now I understand that I deserve so much better then what he could give me. My only wish for this week was that it went smoothy with out any drama, and I most certainly was not going to fall in love with anyone here ever again.

We all sat on chairs in Tony's place when it was time to actually get situated and start camp, Tony's place was named after a man who used to rent the land out to this camp but died many years ago. They renamed it in honor of him and we always gathered here for Mass or if we were going to start activities. I stayed close to Rowan afraid that people could see the insecurities in my head. Every girl has them but mine were too strong because I had just had the worst fight with my best friend who was also my ex so there was definitely a big tension in the air when I walked away from him for the last time right before I left for camp, he mainly did not want me going back to camp because of Chris and although I really did like Dylan he could not control what I did on my free time, this camp had been a tradition in my family for generations and no boy was going to come between that.

As always the week started with people telling us who they were and bonding exercises, but this time was different. They told us to get into our small groups right away and had to answer some pretty personal questions like what's your favorite color, or what city do you live in. My answers were green and Ponoka. I didn't know then but that day at that time I had just met my seven best friends for the rest of the week. There names were Paris, Sarah, Rita, Rowan, Estelle, Lizzie, and Felicity. We talked for the rest of the time just getting to know each other. We talked like old friends that haven't seen each other in forever, but then Chris walked in late as per usual and I shrunk up looking only at the ground. I was soon snapped out of my daze by Felicity snapping her fingers in my face. I quickly smiled to show them that I was just thinking about nothing important and nothing was wrong. By the time my small group had finished talking it was time to go to the mess hall and get some food in us before the fun and games. We got hamburgers for supper and french fries, as casual as this meal was I could barely touch it because every time I went to go take a bite my stomach would churn, I only ended up eating a few fries and calling it quits.

We walked out of the mess hall after supper and to Tony's place where we talked and gathered to get ready to play games. We soon learned that we would be playing a game called capture the flag. I loved that game and my specialty was saving people from the jail never actually trying to find the flag. No one ever saw my coming and I had been there so long that I knew where the best spots were to hide and watch for an opening to save people. People were so naïve that they didn't even bother looking anywhere but in front of them to see if anyone was going to save anyone. They thought that I wasn't smart enough to go around but then again they didn't know I had been going to Olvc for five years and I had been playing this game longer in these woods. Every year I used the same strategy and every year it always worked.

I was going to save my best friend Felicity when the game was in full swing but then I saw her crush and I told him to save her instead and she looked so happy when he did. At least someone could find their Romeo or some kind of version of him where they do not both end up dead. I looked for anyone else I could save but the only one there was Chris, the guy that I have had a camp crush on for years and I just got over him after he had shown his true colors. Plus he was mister popular and I was a weirdo with a tight friend group. To save people you have to hug them or it doesn't count. I went behind him and hugged him as fast as I could. He turned around when I stopped hugging him and smiled. We held hands because we had to and walked back to our side as was told or else I would never have done it. Felicity was waiting for me at our side of the field and started to laugh when she saw who I was holding hands with. She laughed at my misery and waited till we got to the line and Chris was long gone before she said anything.

"So how was hugging and holding hands with Chris your long lost love" she mocked. I just looked at her and to my horror Chris's voice came into my head.

"Oh so i'm your long lost love then". I could just hear him smiling as he said that. The only problem was that Felicity was looking terrified. I slowly turned around and Chris was there. He hadn't said it in my head. He was still behind me the whole time. My eyes got wide, I hated the look on his face. His smirk was so annoying and I just wanted to just slap it off of his face, so I said the one words that I thought might sting a little.

"Not after last year"

The bell rang shortly after and my team won once again because we had Mathew and Chris, the famous brothers at OLVC, who always found the flag. Everyone knew them. Boys wanted to be them and girls wanted to be with them. Honestly I had enough of them for a lifetime but I was stuck with them for another six days. We walked to Tony's place to talk only to find out that it was snack time and being in Tony's place was pointless so we all walked to the Mess hall and my small family sat down together and started laughing. I looked behind me because I could feel someone's eyes burning into my back.

I watched Chris after, he was with his friends laughing loudly acting like no one was around them. They were the popular and I probably would never be them but I didn't need to be. I had my girls and even though whenever I looked at Chris my heart skipped a beat I could take those feelings and squish them to the bottom of my heart, while focusing on other more important things. Estelle gave me that look that they were boys who were stupid and always thought the world revolved around them. I just called them jerks. I was so over boys. The only reason that I was here was to make new friends and to get over my boy drama and I didn't need anymore at camp. I was just tired of every week seeing him and not being able to get him out of my head for a week and then for the whole year after longing for him to even notice me until camp comes again. An endless cycle that I felt was never going to end.

I ate my night snack in peace listening to my new besties talk. It was so similar to what happens at home that I didn't realize all my friends were looking at me expectantly. I said what and then realized that Chris was right in front of me smirking.

"Please repeat the question I was zoned out because you are here" I said to Chris. His smirk only widening as I said those words.

"Will you go to the dance with me?" Chris said. Oh I almost forgot. Every week there is a dance and the boys are supposed to ask the girls. If you didn't have a date then you couldn't go. I contemplated my pro's and con's. He was a jerk and I had no intention of going with him even if my heart withered up and died because of this. I smirked and said.

"No" and with that I walked to the bathroom and did my happy dance. I had just shot Chris down and the shock on his face was beautiful. Yes he was hot but Chris thought he could have any girl he wanted. He couldn't have me though and I was so happy for that last year yes but this year was a new version of myself and I was not going to let him push me around again.

Checking my phone I waited a while till I walked into the Mess hall again to see that Chris was sulking at his table and wasn't talking to anyone. He looked up as the doors shut hard together and I waltzed back to my table with a bright smile. I could see Glenn looking at me with hope.

"Why does Glenn keep staring at me?" I said with insecurity. My friends just laughed.

"He totally has a crush on you. Did you see the way he smiled when you shot down Chris. It was priceless" Estelle said like it was obvious and I was the only one that wasn't seeing it. I looked at him again and he was busy talking to his buddies, but his smile was big just like she said. We ended supper and I walked to Jubilee hall where I slept.

The last thing we did before going to bed was sitting around a camp fire. It was a nice way to cool down from the exciting events that had happened that day and we also got to sing which was another thing I loved to do. We sang songs together like we were all one. After the up beat songs were done we sat down and sang slow peaceful songs. I had a shower and dried my hair after I got to the cabin. I brushed my teeth and went to bed after reading for a little bit. I dreamt of home and the mess that I had left. My boyfriend breaking up with me and my sister running away because she did not want to be controlled by anyone. Home everything was messy almost as much as it was here but here I had a chance to change things, home I had to wait.