Chapter 11: My First Kill

Time went by really, really first. I saw my little boy grow into a young boy. I saw him off to Kindergarten, I taught him to ride his bike. I still recall how happy he was when we gifted him the bicycle on his fourth birthday. Also I can't forget how he kept falling while trying to ride on his own. The small scratches he got from falling down, how we could disinfect them and he could scream out loudly "ouch! Dad it hurts "and I would assure him that he would be fine before he even knew it. Telling him some bedtime stories and tucking him in bed. The long strolls we took, eating street foods, going to the pack. I mean I felt like I was being a good father, I'm not sure about that though coz i never had one. Seeing him grow was my biggest flex and the good memories I can't get rid of.

As time went by, I began to fail as a father. I would come home late after he had already slept. Whenever my wife inquired I'd tell her the business had become good and the customers came in even as late as 11:00 pm. Often I'd find her sleeping on the couch waiting for me even as late as 1:00 a.m. My dinner on the table cold she could warm without complaining, serve me await and walk together to sleep. I felt like the luckiest husband in the entire world, but at times I could feel sorry for her.

Christmas being the time we all anticipated I swore to be there for them fully and make it up to both of them. So on the Christmas Eve I closed down the shop earlier. As I walked down the street I laid my eyes on some people who really looked familiar. "Harry ...…Cassie ....," I said in a low tone. I wasn't sure if it was them or my eyes were playing some dirty tricks on me. I decided to walk behind them to confirm whether it was them. As they crossed the streets and walked to the club with the help of the street lights I confirmed it was them. I called out their names; they seemed startled for a second. Harry tapped Cassie's shoulder and shouted 'Robs'.

'Wait are you sure that's him?' she asked. 'If anything i can't forget my boy's voice,' he replied .He approached me as Cassie followed him fear written all over their force. Where I stood was darker, the street lights didn't spot where I stood. I really wanted to burst into laughter on seeing how afraid they were but then I had to contain myself. When they realized it was me both sighed in relief and Cassie shouted "Jeeez! Robs you scared us." We walked into the bar laughing and talking continuously as we began to catch up. Both of them had made it in life without me and that pissed me off. They had bigger positions in whatever jobs they did. Both of them we were wearing designer clothes. I can't forget iced watch and chain Henry had on. The short shiny-black dress and jewelries Cassie had seemed to be so expensive. 'There's no way they have made it in life so quickly, they might be involved in some illegal business or some cult,' I thought. I was lost in my thoughts when Cassie asked me what I was doing. I was so bitter I couldn't believe myself. How could I be so jealous of my best friends?

'Are you here with us?' Harry snapped me back to reality. I giggled confusedly 'Can you come up again?'

'A trailer of your life,' He said. I told them I was married with one kid and I owned a cafeteria .So short, precise and boring lifestyle. They were so shocked to hear that I had married. As we kept talking I realized I wasn't wrong after all. They had made it in life. Cassie was a designer in Paris and Henry was a gay model situated in Paris as well. I failed to understand how their lives turned out to be so great. I felt a lot of rage and anger in me. I held the glass of bear with the rage almost breaking it. I didn't figure out that they would be better than me.

'I really have to go my son must be waiting for me and I don't want to let him down you know, he's all I've got,' I said as I stood up. Cassie tried to stop me from leaving so early, Henry even promised to drop me, but the high levels of jealous in me couldn't allow me to stay back. Drank, jealous and angry I walked into a woman two meters away from the club. She had Curly hair of shoulder length, medium height and fair skin tone. She wore a white short single sleeved dress that revealed her curves and no one could resist looking at her cleavage. For a second I thought I'd go with her and smash and maybe forget about my betrayal but I was wrong.

'Watch where you're going looser' she shouted as she pushed me to the ground. From where I fell I replied to her as she turned to walk away 'You're so accurate at guessing, a looser that's what I've always been ever since I was born. My best friends just betrayed me, my dad died when I was young , I was assaulted my cousin , I almost killed my classmate ,my bully BTW, I got expelled from school and now I'm the worst father.' She stretched her hand and pulled me up. She apologized for being mean and harsh. She even offered to buy me coffee. My drank self and lust couldn't resist any offer from her. I even forgot my son and wife. 'Maya Greenwood is my name, I'm 45 years old and I used to be a sex worker something that I'm not so proud of', she said and immediately I shifted my thoughts to being in enclosed room with her. "No need to be hard on yourself because of your downs, we all has bad days," she continued. She spent like five minutes talking me down but I heard nothing. She received a phone call and all she said was that she was on her way. "I have to cut this conversation short, but I had plans for the night with my friend," she said as she placed the money on the receipt.

"There's no way I'm letting you walk all alone on these unsafe streets," I said she tried to resist but I insisted and she agreed with me. We walked out together. I recall clearly the streets were empty, cold and very dark that particular day. I guess most people were indoors having some G-time with their families. As we kept walking, we came across this houses that seemed non-residential. Immediately I knew this was my perfect shot to smash her. "Did you hear that?" I asked pretending to hear some voices of cry. She asked what I had heard. "Can't you hear the cry for help?" I whispered as I walked into the dark alley. "You're kidding me right? It's dark over there," she stood waiting for me to come back. I made zero movements and she called out in a freaked out voice "hello, are you still in there?" I shouted back "come and see it, it's a young beautiful baby." She walked hurriedly towards me. The pain of a mother, any suffering child sets any mother's wombs ablaze. Somewhat I knew tricking her by saying it was a child she would certainly walk into that darkness without having to think twice.

Immediately she walked up to me I hugged her tightly that she couldn't escape at all. She began to push me away shouting "Leave me alone you scoundrel." "Relax baby, you won't regret it and I need this as much as you do." I said as I lowered my hand slowly grabbing her ass. She kept hitting and telling me to stop but I turned a deaf ear on her. She finally managed to get loose from my grip but she fell down. I got up and I was unto her trying to pull up her short dress as she kept hitting me till she hit me so hard on my balls. She left me groaning and she was walking away when she said something like "I'll have to report you to the authorities and you'll rote in jail asshole."

I froze on hearing her words. My thoughts wondered to the humiliation my wife and son will have to go through. Michael being bullied the same way I was, was my biggest fear. "Don't move", I shouted with a shaky voice. She kept walking and I said "Don't force me to pull the trigger." She stood suddenly as if she had been paralyzed and turned back to confirm whether I had a gun. "Holy fucking shit," she shouted once she knew it was no longer a dramedy. In my shaky hands I held my gun; she was on her heels running for her life. I kept shouting asking her to stop but she didn't listen. I panicked and pulled the trigger aiming at the back of her head. She fell to the ground with a pool of blood covering her immediately. F*** what have I done? I thought out loudly.

Immediately I came back to my senses or rather my senses came back to me. Confused and panicked I realized I might have killed an innocent human who had been jovial not long ago.