Chapter Twelve:

The CAT scan was done and everyone was much calmer. Not because things had been resolved, but because things were much worse. I have a tumor in my brain and according to the doctors it looked cancerous. I asked my parents to leave me, and my mother dragged her feet, but granted my wish.

Both girls came to me and suffocated me with hugs and tears. I cried too which upset Abs so much that she left to look for mom, leaving Sam alone with me for the first time.

'Well, at least I can say that I have loved in my short lifetime!' I joked with her.

'Don't bloody joke when I am so serious. You are going nowhere, Jordi. We are still going to run away and leave everyone behind. How can I go without you? I already saw my future with you when you put this ring on my finger; I will have that future with you because you owe it to me dammit! You cannot leave me!'

I asked her to give me some time alone. She granted my wish and then everything sunk in. How was it possible? I was way too young, and a runner for goodness sake! I had found my true love and my life should have been complete, but it had played a sick trick on me.

I felt numb while the doctors told me to decide quickly on action, because if the MRI scan showed that I have cancer, then I would need chemo or they would need to operate. I was also told that judging by the size of the tumor an operation could possibly leave me handicapped and didn't mean the cancer would go away. Later I told Sam that there was no way I would put her through either of those things.

She looked at me and asked, 'Jordi, is your life only yours alone? Do I have no say in it? I want you to decide for us all please.'

'How come you get to be so clever and bloody older all the time?' I asked, and she burst out laughing.

'If I were to die now, I know your laughter would echo in my soul forever just like my love for you Sam.'

'Well, you don't share that thought alone. I will love only you forever, no one else.'

She kissed me through our mixed tears. I was told not to bump my head too much and to stress less until I had made up my mind. By the look of things, they needed quick decisions. They did an MRI brain scan to get more clear and detailed information for understanding in regard to my tumor. I silently made up my mind that I wouldn't undergo any operations, nor have any treatments. Mr. Peters and his wife never came to the hospital. He told his daughter that it was me who had brought trouble to his peaceful home.

The MRI was in and I have cancer in an advance stage. I needed treatment or an operation as soon as possible because there was severe pressure on the brain which would get worse in the coming months. All I could think of was my mother, Sam, my sister, and athletics. To say that I was in shock was an understatement, but my family was there and I needed to be strong for them.

I requested for only my mother to be with me when the doctor came in. I was nervous.

'A biopsy is needed as well, Jordan. I could be wrong but think the grade of your cancer could be anything from 3 to 4, a very fast-growing tumor by the look of it.'

Nothing could comprehend that feeling. Out of complete shock, my mother abandoned me and took the taxi home, forgetting that we had come in her car. I asked Sam to come and meet me at the hospital because I just needed her there, not anyone else. The tumor found itself between the two cerebral hemispheres, not that it really mattered, to me it was just plain brain cancer.

The doctors found it extremely strange that I had only suffered from headaches and fainting and not had any seizures or other symptoms at this advanced stage.

'Jordi, what is wrong?' Sam asked when she saw me and I broke down telling her everything. I cried like a freaking baby with her holding me while saying that we would even get through this; I'd see to it.

I dried up very fast, this girl who needed me too. I would be strong for her, at least for the time we would have together, because being together would not be that easy. I knew it for a fact. I decided that I would enjoy every moment that she would allow me to be with her, but if I saw that it affected her, I would do the best thing for her and end our relationship.

I struggled to understand how she could be so calm about this while I was such a total wreck. We got home and I asked to go take a rest. Sam said she was coming with me. I couldn't argue but asked her to please behave to make light of this dark day. I only wanted her to hold me and that she did. I think we had been asleep for quite some time when my dad came in.

'What the fuck is going on here? You might be ill, but I want you to respect my house! Young lady, find your way out of my son's room now!'

'Sam please give me a moment, I will be with you right now. Dad, can I talk to you please?' But he wouldn't hear anything.

'Your mother will be here soon. See Sam home, the family is coming together for you today.'

'Well ask them to wait for me. Sam I need time to talk with you, let's get out of here.'

I pulled her to the man cave and locked us in.

'I am so sorry about this, Sam. It is going to be hard, this relationship of ours. I want you to decide now if I am worth the risk of being wronged by my parents and yours. Just about everyone is against us, even this fucking illness.'

'I gave you the only option available, Jordi, but you are so stubborn. Let's just run away. You will not decide for me. Do you hear me? I gave you my forever and if it is going to be tough, I will not let you give up because of me. You are worth taking all those risks for. Did I not prove it enough to you? I am not proving anything to anyone, but you so just give up on those thoughts breeding in there, it is not going to happen!'

I just wanted to feel whole in that moment and kissed Sam like a possessed person. I knew if it was not for the determined banging on the door we would have done things we were not ready for. A frustrated call from my father got an equally frustrated reply from me to just give me a moment.

'I just don't understand the suspicion from them when we have not done anything, Sam. We have had way more alone time than they did in their day, and now we are showing them that we can be trusted but look at them. Do they afford us the same decency? No. So really, what is the use of all this?'

Both Sam and I knew that we would have really been tested if my father had taken a bit longer. I walked back into the house holding Sam's hand, my pillar of strength.