Chapter 14:

I dressed and climbed into the taxi that was to drop me off at the hotel, in upper Woodstock. It was very late as I stepped into the foyer. There I met the love of my life and my heart leapt. I had never seen such beauty, and she just laughed because she knew what my expression meant.

We didn't even need words. She had a bag which I took from her. I didn't know what was happening, but she said she would explain very soon. What was there to explain? I stood speechless in front of the double bed in our ensuite bedroom.

'Jordi, this has been my greatest wish for a few weeks now and I promised myself that it would become a reality. I told your sister that I would be taking you away for a bit so she could cover for us. I fear that our lives are never going to be the same so here I am, making the most of what we have. We can suffer the consequences later, what do you say?'

'I think that I am hopelessly in love with you now, even if you appear to be completely out of your mind.'

She laughed and I wondered again how something like that could move me beyond even this craziness.

'First, I want to feel your laughter vibrate in my soul. I am scared that this will be something I will miss the most if our lives should change'.

I pulled her towards me. She pushed me away with unknown strength.

'Not now, Jordi, you are going to make me untidy. We have supper to eat first.'

On cue there was a knock at the door. We ate in silence mostly from the anxiety of what we knew was to follow. It was eating at us both. I had not planned this, but Sam was most definitely ready for everything. And after planning this for weeks, she should be. We pushed the food tray into the passage and turned the DO NOT DISTURB sign on the door.

We shared the dessert, feeding each other. If they say strawberries and cream does it, well it certainly did create the mood. I knew I had to step up. I wanted it to be memorable for this beautiful girl in front of me. I moved towards her and taking in a deep breath, licked the cream off her lips. I lingered a bit over her bottom lip before pulling it into my mouth. It felt warm and inviting. She was ready and came for me.

Never did anything look so desirable. I stopped her eagerness. I wanted this to be about her. I picked her up and carried her towards the bed; I hoped all would fall into place and that I wouldn't lack anything may the gods be with me.

I asked if I could remove her dress, because let's face it, we were not there to play games. The shit suddenly became real. All I wanted at that moment, was to step it up to the level she wanted. I unzipped the dress ever so slowly and pushed it down for her to step out of it. The girl transformed into the woman of my dreams.

What was I to do next without being too over-eager? I put her down on the bed and started to undress myself while she watched, totally sexy and half-naked. My heart was racing, my throat was dry, my breathing as heavy as if I was gasping for air. I thought I was having a panic attack, so I just sat down on the bed to calm myself.

'Sam, I know I want to do this, but I am afraid that once this is over you might not feel the same way about me. This is all too new for me, what if I fail you now with all this?'

I could see that she understood as she sat up and moved closer to me.

'You are too damn perfect for me, Jordi. Maybe I just want to be with you knowing our bond will be stronger than ever and to show you how I feel without interruptions.'

I kneeled in front of her and it turned out badly again. The position I found myself in was even worse. She opened her legs, rubbed my face, kissed me gently and all the anxiety just disappeared. I knew I couldn't go back now. She opened her eyes so that I could see what I was doing to her. That feeling was indescribable, but the look in her warm hazel eyes told a story only to me. She moved back on the bed waiting for me to join her. I kissed her ever so tenderly, but she became rougher and more demanding in her kisses, demanding that I match her enthusiasm. She was not waiting on anything and removed my boxers herself.

Shyly I got up, it was the first time I had been completely naked in front of a girl and I wondered what she thought of me. Was it the same for her? But she reached out to me as I passed her and kissed me making my erection hit her stomach. I tried to talk my mind into stopping for I had put this girl through so much already. I was sure she got a fright too but did not want to admit it.

'You need to get used to us, Jordi! I can read your mind right now. We are here now so we better make the most of it.'

I really wanted to, but my shyness and the anxiety of what I had put her through, was winning at that moment. It put me off and must have been very disappointing to her. We decided to rather go sleep for it was somehow very late. It was most definitely me postponing the inevitable. I put Sam's head on my chest and that was how we fell asleep. I woke up to her hand on me, waking it up too.

'Sam, you are going to get us in trouble!'

'No Jordi, I will not and by the way I have news for you, we are already in trouble, our families will know what we have been up to.'

'You need to put a condom on,' she mumbled while she kissed me hard and hungrily, making me even harder. I removed my boxer as she was completely naked under the blankets. I got up to put the light on, but this time she was shy because she had seen my body. She pushed the blankets off and invited me to come to her. How could I ignore such an invitation?

There was no turning back this time. I kissed her to distract her, but she did better by putting her legs around me giving me permission with her ways. Clumsily, I drove into her, but when I saw the shock on her face it made me sick to my stomach. I froze right there and didn't know what to do. I apologised and she put her finger on my lips.

'Don't talk now, Jordi.'

I took it out and then pushed back in again. Every time she gasped for air because she was so narrow. By the third or fourth thrust I was beyond myself and try as I wanted to, I couldn't stop now. How could I, when I had lost all control. It was already too late. I was like a mad man. All my teenage years and growing into a man just completed itself right there in front of my eyes and I spilled in her without thinking. There must have been no enjoyment because she looked sad. I hoped it wasn't a disappointment. I slipped out of bed, picked her up and took us both into the shower. Traces of what we had done were evident on the sheet and having to see her blood pained me beyond measure. I was quiet as I washed me off her. I believed it was my duty, as the shock of it all was still evident on her face. I dried her slowly, and carefully put a gown on her; then did the same for myself. I walked out and sat on the chair by the small table facing Table Mountain. It was lit up for us to experience its beauty at night.

'Sam, I am so sorry! I have always romanticised sex the first time, wanting it to be great. Well, most of it was until I lost it. Honestly it felt so damn good being one with you. I am an insensitive pig that only thought of myself. I even came inside you. What if …?'

'Most of it was great for me, except for the sex part. It was painful as hell, Jordi, but I have survived it and so did you,' she said and kissed me gently. I could not believe how selfless she could be when I put her through the hell she spoke about. I could never hurt her. We went back to sleep out of exhaustion. I woke up first and ordered room service. Sam looked so beautiful, and I knew that this was what I wanted to look at forever. I did some serious thinking while watching her fall asleep and needed to talk to her.

'Sam, I am going on treatment and may do the operation, but I'm not going back to school next year. I am going to find myself a job for there is nothing to look forward to. I cannot run and you are done with school. I am moving out of my dad's house and will live with my mom in their garden flat. Will you move in with me then?'

'Why can't I move in with you now, Jordi? I am not going to university. I may do it sometime, but I realise that I want to be with you.'

'Sam, you may not like living with me after the operation and I don't want you to waste away your life caring for me. It is possible that I may not even be myself thereafter. So think about it carefully, but I will tell my family of my intentions for you to move in with me, okay?'

'There's no need for me to think about it. I have already made up my mind. I want to create memories with you, Jordi, to keep close in our hearts, so when things become difficult, we will remember these times.'

'I just hate the thought of what hindsight will show us; so we will create our own destiny even if it does not work in the end. Are you sure Sam?' When she said yes, I took her in my arms and kissed tenderly. It soon became wildfire kisses, which then turned out to be uncontrollable. This time when I entered her, I felt her need by the warmth that consumed me and we came together. What utter bliss, knowing I could love her, my whole world, in this way.

'Sam, you know you may have got your wish of running away, but reality is waiting for us.'

'Yes, Jordi, I hear you.'

We both felt reality hitting us in the face and on this thought we got ready to leave the little paradise she had created for us. The atmosphere changed so much that out of frustration I got up fast and went to the bathroom to compose myself. My only wish was that I could take her away with me forever. This was not to be, but I was so angry with life at that moment.