Fifteen

AVERY

I almost drop my phone when Aiden tells me.

He's at the police station, because he beat Dan to a bloody pulp outside his house. I barely register what he says after that, though he is probably answering the questions swirling my mind.

Why was Dan there? What did he say that made Aiden act so violently? What did Aiden say? Did he tell him he knew everything?

"Avery, please tell me you're still there," Aiden's pleading voice comes through the barely gripped phone.

"Why did you do it?" I ask, my voice so small, I hardly recognize it myself.

I hear him let out a shaky breath. "I wasn't expecting him to show up at my door, and honestly I wanted to handle everything without violence, I told him to leave. Then, he started saying all these horrible things, about you and your mother."

He pauses and takes another deep breath. "I couldn't take it, I got so angry I blacked out, and the next thing I knew, I was staring down at his bloody face. I knew what was going to happen when I blacked out, it's always the same, but once it happens, I can't stop the consequences."

I feel tears prick the corner of my eyes. I don't want to ask the questions pressing my mind, so many of them clouding my brain, I don't know which one to ask.

I pick whichever one weighs the most. "Aiden, what did you tell Dan?"

I can feel the intensity leaking through the phone, and the regret coming off Aiden, making the hole in my chest gnaw away at the sides with dismay, growing bigger by the second.

"I didn't tell him anything, but he was able to tell from the way I acted before I blacked out, that you told me everything. I'm so sorry, Avery. I tried to keep it a secret, but he knew."

My heart thumps painfully, anxiety flooding my chest.

"Was he arrested too?" Please, give me some of my luck back.

I swear I hear Aiden let out a sob. "I'm sorry, Avery."

That's all the confirmation I needed.

Before I know exactly what I'm doing, I end the call. My heart is beating rapidly in my chest and my palms are getting sweaty, shaking as I drop my phone on the couch next to me.

Everything I have worked so hard for, is all crumbling in front of me. Dan knows I blabbed, I broke the deal and he isn't safely locked away. Instead, he's probably being cared for, and will be out and hunting me again in a couple days.

That doesn't give me nearly as much time as I would need to not only formulate an escape plan, but figure out where to go, and be able to afford getting there. Then, there is my mother.

What am I going to do about her? Once Dan is released, there is no telling what havoc he is going to unleash when he gets home. Even if I get there first, then what? He is going to beat me so bad; he might actually kill me this time.

Maybe if I tell him that Aiden has confessed to everything he knows, that he won't. He will think the police are watching him and might look into our family life, and won't have the choice but to keep me alive, and only beat me where no one can visibly see the damage.

That is my only hope. There is nothing else I can hope for.

There is no hope for escape.

There is no hope for rescue.

It's going to be like last time. Dan might not be able to get the support of the public to help him this time, but he sure as hell is going to lie his ass through this entire thing, and make sure he beats my mother and I into agreeing to play happy family, until this blows over and we pack up again.

"Hey, Avery, is everything alright?" Tammy asks, pushing the screen door attached to the front entrance open, a timid smile on her face.

I feel bad for barging over like this, after contacting her out of nowhere, and not explaining anything.

Should I at least tell her about Aiden? If I do, that means I have to tell her about why he is there, and I can't do that. It would just dig the hole I'm already sinking into even more.

I try and manage a convincing smile and stand up. "Yeah, everything is great. That was just a phone call from my mother, I have to get home."

She looks reluctant to let me go, which confuses me. I never asked to stay the night, though I had first come over with the intention of hiding out for the night. Now, I have no choice but to return home and hopefully warn my mother of everything, before Dan contacts her.

"Why don't you stay the night? We can have a girl's night, drink some of my parent's wine and watch chick flicks until we pass out," she says, her smile hesitant.

"Thanks, as great as that sounds, I should really get home. My mother needs me, and my father isn't going to be home for a few hours, he works on weekends." I quickly lie, trying not to cringe by using the word 'father' to describe Dan.

Tammy doesn't look convinced, though. "Why don't I come with you, maybe I can help. I don't have any plans for today," she says and gestures around her, like all the activities a normal person does is laid out before us.

Why is she so persistent on not leaving me alone? Did Aiden tell her everything too? There's no way, he would've told me that, at least. Hell, he just told me he was arrested for beating the shit out of Dan.

Why wouldn't he tell me if he told Tammy anything? Besides, I doubt if he did, she would be able to hide it for this long. We have spent all morning and the majority of the afternoon together, talking about Aiden confessing his feelings to me, losing my virginity and other girly crap.

She knew exactly the right things to say about how Aiden feels and the way he acts, especially when I told her, quite vaguely, that he said something that hurt me, and that's why I had left.

With that thought, I think about the fact that the only reason she was able to do that, is because she is one of Aiden's best friends. Which means, she is probably going to find out about what happened to him sooner or later.

Is there a point in trying to hide it? Will it really make my situation any worst?

Aiden has already gone to the cops, and if they do look into anything, it means Dan is going to find out and act out. If they don't do anything, he might never find that out, and I can still use it against him, but I'll still receive a harsh beating.

What do I really have to lose?

Nothing. Until the day I met Aiden, I have never had anything to lose.

Now, I probably have lost him. He has been arrested and my bitter fate is sealed.

He also betrayed my trust. He is the one who sealed my fate. He didn't have to say anything to the cops, but he did. I have no doubt, he told them everything, or at least enough for them to possibly open up a case.

I take a deep breath and sit back down on the porch steps. Tammy gets the hint and sits down next to me, giving me a side glance and clutching the edge of the wood.

"The call I got was from Aiden, he's at the police station," I say, pausing to let her digest the bit of info.

She groans and covers her face. "Oh no, what did he do?"

Usually, her tone is snarky, like she expected him to screw something up, like a child.

This time, she almost sounds scared, and I haven't even told her what for.

"He beat a guy up, left in a mess apparently."

Her gasp cut me off and I turn to her. Her blue eyes are wide now with evident fear, her flawless face ashen in dismay.

"You've got to be kidding me," shut mutters under her breath and buries her face in her hands. "God, he is such an idiot."

Tammy seems a lot more disappointed than I would have expected. Does Aiden get arrested often? And if so, what for?

"Why do you seem so upset about this? I mean, I know it doesn't look good, but he's a minor and this is probably his first major offense. They aren't going to give him that bad a sentence–"

"This isn't his first offense for something like this," she groans, uncovering her face to look at me solemnly. "There's a reason Aiden already knew everyone at school, except you. You have been the only new person to our school in the last 2 years, the last time Aiden was here. Have you never thought why that was?"

"Well, he mentioned he went away to live with his mother, but that was all he really said, he never told me why," I say, remembering he had mentioned something about it, but seemed to want to avoid the conversation all together.

"Aiden used to go to school with us, since elementary school actually, we all grew up together. Until two years ago, when he disappeared one day and none of us were given a straight answer as to why."

"What happened? Where did he go?"

Tammy looks out towards the end of the driveway, as if the answers are written on the darkening shadows cast along the pavement from the large oak tree occupying her front lawn.

"He went to a juvenile detention center."

Not what I was expecting.

"Aiden never told me about that," I say, my voice so quiet you'd think I spoke to myself.

"Probably because he still feels guilty, he never should have been there. He tried to do the right thing, be the hero, and he ended up a villain." She takes a breath and clasps her hands between her knees.

"Aiden was out one night, being a rascal like he usually was, and saw a very powerful man, raping an unconscious girl in an alley. Without thinking, he confronted the man and told him to stop, but the man acted like he wasn't there and continued to defile the woman right in front of him."

She stops and chews her lip, looking hesitant to continue.

"I'm not sure if I should tell you this next part, I feel it's something Aiden should share with you."

I look down at my hands and feel a slight sting in my chest. "He had plenty of chances to tell me all of this. If it's really something he needs to tell me, then he would have by now."

Tammy lets out a defeated sigh. "Okay but if anything goes down between you two, I am not the one who spilled the beans, alright?" she asks and points a stern finger at me.

I manage a smile and hold my pinky out to her. "Pinky promise."

She humors me and wraps her pinky around mine.

"Aiden might literally kill me for telling you this, and he has a few good reasons for not telling you himself. There are some things that people don't ever want others to find out about them, because they don't like it themselves."

"What about Aiden does he not like about himself?" I ask.

Of course, everyone has a few flaws that they don't like. What's bad enough that you never want anyone to find out?

"Aiden blacks out, like has a moment of total amnesia and goes completely insane while he's out. What I mean by insane, is he blacked out when the man refused to get off the girl, and he almost beat him to death. If someone hadn't stepped in, he would've killed him, without being aware until he came too."

I let her words slowly sink into me, like a marble sinking in molasses. I hear everything she is saying, but the meaning is struggling to hit me.

Unable to process what she says just yet, I focus on something else that doesn't seem right to me.

"Given that situation, how did he end up getting sent to juvie?" I ask.

Tammy frowns, like she expected me to freak out and now she is disappointed she doesn't get to see a show.

"Like I said, the man is a powerful business man here in Athens, and so is his father. The duo paid off the family of the girl, so they refused to testify. Aiden was seen as nothing more than an enraged teenager, who beat a rich man senseless. He was sentenced to two years in juvie, he was released a few days before you met him."

She takes a deep breath, letting out and planting her hands on top of her knees, as if she has just finished a large task.

Everything starts hitting me at once, the true meaning of her words.

Aiden blacks out when he becomes too enraged, and has very violent tendencies when he does. I now have a clearer understanding, of what might have what down between Aiden and Dan.

He said he showed up at Aiden's house, no doubt looking for me. I can imagine he was wasted, or at least a little tipsy, depending what time he woke up and started drinking. Knowing Dan's own anger, even without being drunk, he egged Aiden on and pissed him off bad enough; he blacked out and almost beat Dan to death.

What snapped him out of it? Did someone come to the rescue, and were they also hurt by Aiden? What did Dan say that tipped Aiden over the edge?

What makes Aiden tip over? How long can someone push before his anger explodes?

I can't handle all the questions swirling my head, topped with the anxiety of Dan finding me, Aiden going back to juvie, and me never seeing the light of day.

If Dan doesn't kill me, I might just do it to stop the pounding in my head.

"Avery, are you alright?" Tammy asks, touching my shoulder lightly.

I realize I have my head in my hands, my fingers clutching thick strands of my hair. I'm leaning over on my knees, my eyes shut tight and my breathing labored. I'm on the verge of a panic attack, I can feel it.

"I need to talk a walk," I managed to mutter out through hacked breaths.

She rushes to catch up to me as I walk quickly down the driveway. "Slow down, let me come with you."

"No, it's fine. I need to be alone." Does she not here how panicked I sound? I'm going to freak out any moment, and I'm not sure what that means.

"Avery, you don't know this area at all, you're going to get lost."

Why is she so persistent? Why did I think coming here was a good idea?

If I had just stayed at Aiden's and given myself a bit of time to get over what he said, I would've forgiven him and everything would've been fine. If Dan had still shown up, I would have been there to help Aiden handle it, and maybe stop him from getting arrested.

"Please, Tammy. I'll call you if I get lost, I promise. I really need to be alone," I say, stopping to grasp her arm, clutching it almost.

She looks like she wants to continue arguing, but eventually huffs and nods her head. "Please, text or call me if anything happens."

I give her arm a squeeze, then turn to walk down the sidewalk, going in the first direction my body decides to go. I flip the sound tab on my phone to on, and shove it further into my pocket with my hand.

Half way down the sidewalk, I spot a little path through an opening between two houses. Going against everything taught to a young girl about walking in dark, closed off areas alone, I wander down the path with the curiosity of seeing where it leads too.

To my luck, it opens out into another row of houses, facing a large parked placed in the middle of what seems like a large cul-de-sac.

It's still early enough in the evening, that there are a few kids running around the park, their parents keeping close eye from a distance as they lounge on benches or stand on the sidelines.

I find an unoccupied picnic table as far away from the play structure and screaming kids, and pull out my phone, switching the screen on. I stare at it blankly, willing it to pop up a number of a person I can speak too about the mess going on in my head.

But I know there is no one. The only person I have come to rely as a shoulder to cry on, is probably in a holding cell, partly because of me.

There's a darker, deeper thought that comes with that.

Do I want to continue to rely on Aiden, after everything I've discovered?

Not only was I told that he is frequent to black-out rages, it was proven to me, on my own father. Though I feel no remorse for that, the chilling thought of what Aiden could be capable of can't seem to leave my mind.

Part of me wants to go and see Dan, show myself to him, just to see the damage done. I know better than that.

The other part, doesn't want to see first-hand what I'm afraid of; Aiden's violent tendencies.

Still staring at my phone, it starts to ring in my hand, my mother's name flashing across the screen. I've been sitting here, waiting for someone's number or name to pop up, and my prayers are finally answered.

But I'm hesitant to pick it up.

There are many reasons my mother could be calling me right now, and I know it isn't to ask where I am. When I disappeared for the night, she was happy I was able to get away, I know she was. She hadn't tried contacting me, knowing Dan would hear right away and beat her for hiding it from him.

My mother loves me, but she also loves not getting beat as much as I do. We do what we can to survive, while still trying to protect each other.

The best way she can do both, is to do nothing. No one understands that.

I swipe the screen before it goes to voicemail and hold the phone to my ear with a shaky hand. "Hello, mom?"

"Avery! Thank goodness, you're alright. Baby, you'll never believe what happened, someone attacked Dan and put him in the hospital, I just received that call now, he is in really bad condition." My mother babbles through the phone, sounding like she is rushing around.

No doubt running through the house to gather an over-night bag, a demand from Dan no less.

I take a deep breath and try to put a bit of remorse in my tone.

"Wow, that's–"

"Wonderful!" my mother exclaims.

"Wait, what? How is that wonderful?" That isn't the response I was expecting, but I can't hide the hope in my voice.

"Avery, don't you see? This is our chance, he's going to be in the hospital at least a week, they have many tests they have to run and the results are going to take a few days, and even then. If there is some serious damage, who knows how long he is going to have to stay there, under a close eye and heavy guard?"

"So, what are you saying, mom?" I feel I know the answer, and at the same time don't want to know it. But it doesn't stop me from asking.

"We're running away, Avery. This is our only opportunity to finally get away from that monster. I've saved up more than enough in tips from work, I was just waiting until the right moment, and it seems someone else has given us that chance. We can't pass it up, you need to come home. Where are you? I have the car, I can pick you up."

How can I tell her the truth? That the only reason we have this chance, is because of Aiden? The man I just gave my everything too last night, and is now sitting in a holding cell?

I can't run away. I can't take the opportunity he gave us. It's too much to ask for him to give up. Why should he be locked up, in exchange for my freedom? All he ever tried to do was help, do what no one else was willing to do.

Why does he have to suffer such a fate, after everything he has done to save me?

"Okay, I'm at a friend's place but I just went for a little walk. Let me get back there and grab the address and I'll text you it." It's not a complete lie, but it is the best thing I can think of to get off the phone.

I already know what I have to do, but this isn't a conversation for over the phone. I owe my mother at least that much.

I return to Tammy's house, where she is still waiting on the porch, except it seems she must have gone inside at some point to grab a pair of slippers and fluffy white house coat, the sun already almost set below the horizon, causing the temperature to drop drastically.

My blood has been pumping wildly through my body all day, since the talk I had with Aiden. I still haven't felt the effects of the cold.

"There you are, I was starting to get worried," Tammy says, her phone clutched in her hand. "Have you heard anything more from Aiden?" She asks.

I can't look at the hope in her eyes. We both know the answer.

"No."

Her shoulders sag, scooting over so I can sit down.

"My mother did call; she wants me to come home tonight."

"How do you feel about that?"

I shrug. "She said the hospital called and said Dan is in bad shape, he will have to stay there for at least a week until his results come in, and then maybe more depending on how bad it is."

"I'm so sorry, that's terrible," she says, patting my shoulder sympathetically. I try and manage a smile, but I know I don't look regretful.

"I need to text her your address," I say and take out my phone to give to her. She gladly types in the message thread and sends it for me. My mother responds right away that she is leaving, and I know with the short distance and her erratic driving, she will be here in no time.

"Do you have a shirt or something I can borrow?" I ask Tammy, picking at the overly large male sweater. "I don't want to explain to my mother where this came from, at least not while he's sitting at the police station."

I try and joke, but neither of us smiles. Tammy nods and rushes inside, returning with a baby blue pull-over sweater. I quickly strip and slip the new sweater on and tucked Aiden's sweater into a ball, just as my mother pulls up at the end of the driveway.

"You have my number now, let me know if you need anything or hear from Aiden," Tammy says, giving me a hug.

"Sounds good, thanks for putting up with me." I squeeze her arm and rush down the driveway before she can say anything more. My mother is peeling away, not giving me the chance to put my seatbelt on, and at the end of the road before I can see Tammy go inside.

"Mom, slow down, Dan is safely away in the hospital."

She reduces the speed a little, but her hands still clutch the steering wheel, her smile nervous. "Sorry, this whole situation has just been a whirlwind. I want to get as far away from that man as possible."

We're pulling into our driveway before I know it, thanking whatever God that we didn't get pulled over, or worst.

My mother rushes out of the car and rounds to the trunk, popping it open, she pulls out several tiny, broken down boxes. I can tell her mind is already three steps ahead.

This is going to be a lot harder than I thought.

I follow her back into the house, already formulating a big speech in my head. "Mom, can you please stop for just a second and listen to me?"

When she still doesn't listen, I step in front of her and stick my hands out.

"Avery, what could possibly be more important than seizing this opportunity to get away from the man who tormented us for years?"

My glare harshens. "Seizing the opportunity to also put him behind bars for a very long time, so we don't have to always look over our shoulders in fear, wondering when is the next time we're going to have to run, never trusting anyone."

She takes a step back, but doesn't walk away. "What are you saying, Avery?"

"I'm saying, my friend is in jail right now, because he is the one who beat the shit out of Dan, because he was trying to protect me, and us. If we run away, then we're leaving him to rot in jail, for a crime we both know was well deserved, and if we help testify for him against Dan, we can win this."

My mother is already shaking her head. "Oh no, no you can't possibly ask me to do that, honey. You have no idea what could happen if we don't win; and I refuse to live with those consequences. Dan has too many connections in the law enforcement, he will win, and we will be right back to suffering, even more this time."

I can't help but drop my mouth open in shock. "You can't be serious? There is no way Dan will win if we testify against him, and even he knows that. Why else has he been threatening us to keep quiet? Because he knows if we both come forward, we have enough evidence to lock him up. No amount of friendships and connection with the police will help him, why can't you see that?"

"Avery, you're not looking at the bigger picture here–"

"The bigger picture, is I'm in love with the guy who is locked up right now," I cry out, cutting her off. "His name is Aiden, and since the day I met him, he has been nothing but supportive and understanding, always wanting to help me out and make me feel better, and now he is rotting in a jail cell, because he loves me that much."

I throw my hands down and stomp around her. I know I'm acting childish, but I could care less. If her mind is set and she won't listen to reason, then so is mine. I slip my shoes back on and grab a jacket from the coat rack, not caring if it's mine or not.

"Avery, where are you going?" my mother calls out, her tone turning back into the stern parent.

I roll my eyes but don't bother turning around. "I'm going to do the right thing, whether you're coming with me or not, I'm not going with you. I'm tired of staying silent."

***

AIDEN

I watch the guards play some card game through the small window against the wall, just outside my cell, as I pick up rocks that chipped from the wall. I throw them aimlessly in front of me, not seeing where they fall, never taking my eyes off the guards.

I know an escape is inevitable, but it's instinct to watch their every move. I often did it in juvie, so I knew when I was safe to sneak into the kitchen and grab an extra brownie, or into the medicine cabinet during monthly routine check-ups, to grab whatever pill bottle my hands could touch, to trade for extra time in the gym or getting out of yard duty.

Going in at first, I didn't know any of this, but a couple of months trapped in there with a bunch of criminally insane animals, you had to find a way around. It might sound like prison, but I was never afraid of getting shanked in my sleep, though there were frequent bully beatings in the yard or cafeteria, but nothing too serious.

Though they did keep criminally insane teenagers at the juvie, they were kept in a completely separate wing, in another entirely different building at the end of the high, barbwire fenced yard. They were never allowed outside while we were, even though their yard was a few 100 feet away from ours, two different gates separating us, so we never really saw them anyway.

My attention snaps up to one of the guards as he sets his cards down, and looks towards the front door. Before he has a chance to get up, I see Avery stride up to the counter.

What is she doing here? Her face is red and it looks like there's dried tear streaks on her cheeks, like she was crying on her way over here and didn't have the chance to wipe them away.

I continue to watch her seemingly argue with the guard, and point towards the room my cell is in, unable to see the small window from where she stands. The guard eventually drops his shoulders and walks around the counter towards the door.

I move to the back of my cell, sitting on the springy bed and stare at my shoes, until I hear the door open. Avery runs up to my cell and grasps the bars, fresh tears in her eyes.

"What are you doing here? What happened?" I ask, reaching through to wipe the dried streaks off her face, the feeling of her smooth skin under my fingertips again enough to calm the racing anxiety in my chest.

She shakes her head and manages a smile. "Nothing happened, at least nothing new."

"Then why were you crying?"

She reaches up and grabs my hands, clasping them between hers. I close my eyes, savoring this moment I know will only last a second, before one of the guards finally looks up from there card game.

"I had a very intense conversation with my mother, she wanted to take this opportunity to run away from Dan."

My heart drops to my stomach. Her mother wanted them to run away? To where, and for how long?

I already know the answer to that.

Avery squeezes my hands, bringing my eyes back up to hers.

"I told her I wasn't going; I couldn't turn my back on you like that. You're willing to go to jail for me, Aiden."

Tears gather in her eyes again, but this time I know it's from gratitude, making my heart swell again.

But the feeling is short lived. Though I know she is right, a part of me did all of this for her, but I had never meant to black out and beat Dan. I exposed everything she was trying so hard to keep secret, I put her life at risk, and I didn't even get Dan arrested.

It's the same situation two years ago, all over again. I tried to do the right thing, and my anger got in the way. If she is going to stand by me and fight, I have to at least tell her who and what she is fighting for.

I tried myself so hard to avoid revealing this secret, hoping I could start over with her. But I fucked it up, and it's the least I can do.

"Avery, before you do or say anything more for me, there's something you need to know. I can't have you fight for me, without knowing the entire truth about why I disappeared for two years."

I take a deep breath, readying myself to launch into the story; then stop as Avery places her hand on my cheek.

"Please don't be mad, but I already know," she says, biting her lip softly.

"W-what? How?"

She shakes her head again. "It doesn't matter, that will always be a secret. What does matter, is it's not going to be like that this time. I'm going to be there to testify with you, and against Dan. I'm going to make sure they understand exactly why you did it, and see that the real evil is a man who tormented and beat his family into silence. They are going to see you as the man who was merely trying to release a girl from a vicious cycle and prison of abuse."

For the first time in a long time, I feel the tears gathering behind my eyes and emotion swelling in my chest. When I was first arrested for beating that rapist, I remember feeling nothing but hollow dread.

"So, you don't hate me?" I ask.

Her face scrunches up in confusion. "Why would I hate you?"

"Because I never told you, and for what I did."

"Aiden, your past is your past. You don't have to go through life carrying it around with you, and honestly, I think what you did was brave and heroic. What that man did, and that girl and her family, it was wrong and I seriously want to punch both of them in the mouths."

I can't help but crack up a little at her soft threat. I know she could never hurt a fly, but imagining her trying to take a swing is both hilarious and adorable.

"You're going to testify for me?" I ask, needing to confirm it one more time. She nods and grabs my hands once more, placing a kiss on the inside of each palm.

"I'm going to fight with you until the very end, even if I have to place myself next to you in this jail cell," she says with a mischievous grin.

"I really wish you were in this moment; it's been too lonely in here without you," I mutter, risking sounding like a sap.

"Don't worry, you won't be in here much longer, I promise."

I shake my head at her and frown. "Don't make that promise, it's too big to keep."

"Well, maybe I have more power on my side than you think."

It's my turn to look confused.

"I got my mother to agree to testify against Dan, as well."