Chapter 8: Ivy

Were you one of the lucky ladies Roan was with Monday night? If so, be a doll and give us all the down and dirty details so we can live vicariously through you. Come on now, you know you're dying to share them... KingOfCampus.com

I'm sorry. Forgive me?

Biting my lip, I stare at the newest text from Finn. He's been blowing up my phone for days. He wants to get together and talk. Which probably means he wants to work things out. The problem is that he really hurt me, and I don't know if I can let that go. Rather stupidly, I'd thought we had something special and within a week or so of me leaving for Paris, he was already hooking up with other girls.

Lexie had never cared for Finn to begin with, so she'd been more than happy to send me a photo every time she saw him out with another girl. Needless to say, I have about forty pictures.

I'm not really sure what to do about the Finn situation. Deciding to ignore the text, I shove the phone back into my bag. It's Saturday morning and I've just taught three tap and ballet classes back-to-back. I should be tired. Teaching fifty-five-minute-long classes to four and five year olds is exhausting. I'd forgotten just how short their little attention spans could be. But they're so dang adorable and full of life that their energy is infectious.

I throw a light pink, off-the-shoulder T-shirt over my leotard before pulling on black leggings and a pair of leopard print ballet flats. Grabbing my bag, I wave goodbye to Donna, the owner of the studio, before pushing my way through the door into the brightly shining sun which strokes my skin with warmth.

I'm not more than two steps from the studio when I spot Finn leaning against the wall of the building with his hands shoved deeply into the pockets of his cargo shorts. He straightens to his full height as soon as our eyes connect. Surprised to find him here, my feet grind to a halt.

"Hi, Ivy."

A tentative smile slides its way across his face as if he's unsure of what my reaction will be. It makes him look boyishly sweet and hesitant. His normally overconfident, cocksure self is notably absent. Which is probably for the best. The expression tugs at something deep inside, reminding me how good-looking Finn is and how easy it was to fall for him freshman year. It's that side of him that drew me in.

"I was hoping we could maybe grab a coffee," he clears his throat, "that is if you're not too busy."

Lexie and I are planning on doing a little apartment shopping after lunch which means that-yes, I do have time to grab coffee but that doesn't necessarily mean I'm ready to sit down with Finn and hash out our past.

When I remain silent, his expression turns pleading, making him look downright adorable. Like a cuddly puppy dog I want to wrap my arms around and squeeze tight.

"Please, Ivy? I just want to talk."

His imploring expression has me folding like a shaky house of cards before I'm able to think better of it. I can only comfort myself with the fact that at some point, we would have probably sat down to talk about what happened between us. So, if not now, then later. Better to get it over with.

I give him a tight nod before hugging my oversized bag closer to my body. "Okay, but I can't stay long. I have plans later." It's not that I'm trying to play games but what I do with my time is no longer Finn's concern. Just like what he does isn't any of mine.

Emotion flares in his hazel eyes before he quickly tamps it down. Instead of fishing for information, he inclines his head toward the shop on the other side of the street. "How about a smoothie?"

Damn but he knows me so well.

After being in the studio for three solid hours with only water to hydrate with, a smoothie sounds absolutely fantastic. I have to admit there's something comfortable about falling back into a friendship with someone who knows all the little things you enjoy. I give myself a mental slap, because that's definitely not a reason to get back together with Finn.

"Okay, sure."

Wordlessly we cross the street before heading inside the shop and ordering our drinks. I get a pomegranate berry smoothie and Finn orders a strawberry banana one which is exactly what we always ordered when we were together. Once we have our drinks, we head outside to sit at one of the little café tables in front of the brick building. It's gorgeous out. I want to soak it all up before the nice days are few and far in between.

With the sun beating down upon us, we both sit, sipping from our straws for a moment before Finn finally says, "Look Ivy, I want to apologize for my behavior the other night. I honestly didn't mean to piss you off." He glances away before quietly continuing. "It took me by surprise that you seemed so chummy with King. That you're already on his radar. I mean, you just got back from France."

Not that I owe him any kind of explanation, but I guess it feels somewhat warranted. We did date for about six months during my freshman year before I left Barnett. "Honestly, I don't know Roan at all." I give a little shrug. "He lives next door and he's in one of my classes. So we've run into each other. That's the extent of our relationship."

Looking slightly agitated, Finn runs a hand through his thick mahogany colored hair which is cut short on the sides and left longer on top as his greenish-brown eyes drill into mine. "Do me a favor and stay away from him, Ivy. Roan is nothing more than a douchebag player and everyone at Barnett knows it. He'll nail anything with a heartbeat, and he doesn't look back once he does. You're way too good for that."

I can't figure out if it's jealousy or genuine concern that has him issuing the warning. "I appreciate the advice, Finn, but I have zero interest in the guy."

Okay...so that isn't altogether true because he's absolutely gorgeous but after that first run in with him (and obviously the second), I'd already figured out he was the worst kind of trouble there is. And in the subsequent days since, my opinion has only solidified. People naturally flock to him. Especially girls. Every time I catch a glimpse of him around campus, there are at least three or four girls vying for his attention.

Thankfully, we haven't had any more exchanges since that party. Not only have I been avoiding Finn, I've been avoiding Roan as well. It also helps that I'm taking eighteen credits, working ten hours a week at On Pointe, and spending every spare moment I can in the dance studio working on chorography.

I don't have time to dwell on a cheating ex-boyfriend or the campus demigod.

Apparently satisfied with my answer, Finn's big shoulders relax as he settles back in his chair. His gaze probes mine before he quietly admits, "I really missed you, Ivy." Now that we've settled the whole Roan King issue, the sad puppy dog look is back in full force.

I almost snort. All those damn photos filed away in a computer folder titled-douchebag ex-boyfriend tell a different story. I'm not sure why he's bothering to go back down this road again.

Instead of responding, I raise a brow and suck my straw.

His gaze falls to my lips and remains there for a long drawn out moment before swinging back up to mine. "I know I broke things off right after you left for Paris." His brows draw together as he pauses. "I guess it was just too hard to think about having a long-distance commitment when we'd only been together for about six months."

I'd been plagued with the same thoughts. I'd really liked Finn and had wanted to try and make things work between us. Rather foolishly, I had hoped he liked me enough to want that as well. Instead, he'd baled within two weeks (if not sooner), leaving me to feel disconnected and depressed.

Which, in hindsight, had been just plain crazy because I'd been in Paris, for god's sake. Who the hell can be all sad bastard in Paris? Well...yeah, me apparently. After a few weeks of moping around, I'd pulled myself out of the funk I'd slid into by walking around the city and immersing myself in the rich culture.

"I was kind of hoping we could give it another shot, you know? Pick up where we'd left off." Slowly he reaches across the table before laying his hand over mine. "I still care about you, Ivy." Something changes in his eyes. A look of vulnerability fills his gaze that I find almost impossible to ignore. "Do you still have feelings for me?"

I stare at our stacked hands as I contemplate the question.

Do I still have feelings for Finn?

We broke up almost fifteen months ago and were basically incommunicado the entire time I was gone. I had relegated Finn McKenzie to the just a guy I had once dated category. No one was more surprised than me when he started bombarding me with text messages about a week before I came home.

After the way he'd hurt me, there was no way I was responding. In fact, I believe the words-he can go screw himself were bandied about in my conversations with Lexie more than a few times.

And yeah, part of me does still feel that way...but I can't deny that I'm torn. I mean, we were together for six months. Not to mention those pathetic puppy dog eyes he keeps casting my way.

I can practically feel myself caving.

Taking a deep breath, I force it out slowly before replying truthfully, "I don't know, Finn." My eyes fasten onto his as I allow him a small glimpse of my heartache. "The way you ended things," I begin softly, "I was away from everything, everyone I knew, trying to get acclimated to a totally different culture. What you did was devastating." Even thinking about it brings back a surge of anger and sadness within me.

Looking remorseful, he nods as if he completely understands what he did was wrong. And maybe he really does.

Who knows...

"I want a chance to show you that I'm not the same guy I was back then." Angling his body toward me, he leans closer. His gaze pleading with mine. "I'm sure you've grown and changed in the fifteen months you were gone...well, so have I. Give me a chance to prove that to you. We were so good together, Ivy." His eyes search mine. "Weren't we?"

Hundreds of unbidden memories tumble their way through my head as we sit and talk. We did have fun together. I'd fallen really hard for Finn freshman year. With my front teeth sinking into my lower lip, I mull over the possibility of starting something up with him again.

If Lexie knew I was contemplating the idea of giving Finn another chance, she would string me up alive. For whatever reason, she'd never liked him. Not even in the beginning when I'd started seeing him. She thought he was nothing more than a cocky player who was running a game on me.

I'd never felt that way. Well, not until she started sending me all those pictures.

He'd been so sweet. Taking me out to eat. Walking me to class. Showing up with flowers. Little things like that. Gestures that had burrowed easily under my skin. And I guess, because of the situation with my dad, I'd been desperate to find someone to love. Someone to feel connected to since I didn't necessarily have that with my family.

When I'd first arrived at Barnett, even though Lexie and I were rooming together, I'd still felt a bit lost. The death of my mom when I'd been fifteen had all but devastated me. And my dad remarrying six months later had only made the situation worse.

Right before the end of first semester, I'd met Finn at a party, and he had literally swept me off my feet. I mean, everyone on campus knew who Finn McKenzie was. Superstar stud lacrosse player. He was bright and handsome and well liked.

The fact he'd sought me out to spend time with had made me feel special during a time when I hadn't felt special to anybody. Not since my mother had died. In the six months we were together, not once had I ever suspected he might be cheating or seeing other girls behind my back.

Not until Lexie started bombarding me with all those photos. After a while, I stopped looking at them. I kept them in a file and watched the number of pictures grow until everything I'd felt for Finn was gone.

And now here he is. Fifteen months later. Wanting a second chance.

Had he changed?

Had he matured?

He definitely looked more mature. In the time I'd been gone, he'd lost the last of his cute boyishness. His handsome face was all chiseled planes and angles. His body was bigger. Shoulders wider. Waist tapered. He was even more attractive than when I'd first met him two years ago.

Were the changes more than physical in nature? Did it matter anymore if they were? I couldn't help but admit there was something easy about falling back into a relationship with a guy who had once meant something to me. A person who knew what I liked and didn't like. By the same token, that relationship already had baggage attached to it.

I needed to figure which one outweighed the other.

"I don't know," I finally murmur. Not because I'm trying to be coy or play games but because I genuinely don't know what to do.

His hazel gaze burns into mine. "I'm asking for a chance, Ivy," he finally says, "just one to prove that I've grown and changed."

Unable to hold his eyes any longer, my gaze falls to our connected hands. All of the good times we'd had swim through my head and before I realize it, the words are tumbling out of my mouth. "Okay. One date."

His lips pull up at the corners as he gently squeezes my hand. "You won't regret it, I promise."

I have the feeling that I probably will regret giving him another chance...

Especially when I tell Lexie.