Chapter 2: The Jedi Trials

Lights flashed red through a haze of smoke hovering in the air. A distant klaxon wailed an urgent song of imminent danger. She glided past adjoining rooms along the corridor; hastily abandoned, their doors ajar. Ahead she drifted, with each step bringing a sense of mounting dread. Bodies lay prone in the adjoining rooms, still smoking from the explosion. She floated through forgotten corridors toward a secret buried deep within – something she had carefully put to rest, like she had her mother, so many years ago.

After an eternity, she reached the end of the corridor culminating at a blackened void. Within, a wheezing, rattling breath echoed as if from the bottom of a well. She ignited her lightsaber, casting a golden light throughout a room that stretched on like endless night. In the far distance of the room, darkness swirled around a throbbing, red wound in time and space. In a throne in the center, hunched over, was a hooded figure. A withered hand protruded from within the cloak, followed by a mirthless cackle.

She awoke suddenly, her chest heaving. Rolling thunder echoed across the valley beyond her window, rain falling gently upon mossy stone. A dull pink glow painted the stone walls of her cramped quarters – a sign that dawn was unfolding. As she fought to orient herself to her surroundings, she reached into the Force, seeking the anchor that her Master had helped her find upon first coming to this planet. Through the Force, the vibrant richness of animal and plant life outside her room flooded her senses, providing a welcome sense of relief. Through all her years living on Yavin-4, the abundance of life within the jungle never ceased to amaze her, nor had it ever failed to soothe the increasingly rare moments when the strange, terrifying darkness that lay at the margins of her memory threatened to overwhelm her.

A nervous warbling from the corner of the room caught her attention. Her droid, a two-legged BD unit painted gold and black, wobbled apprehensively, its antennae strained as they assessed her vital signs and cortisol levels. She smiled weakly at the droid as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes. "It's okay. Just a dream," she reassured the droid. But in hearing the tired strain in her voice, she could not blame the droid for remaining nervous.

After a decade of careful training, guidance, and nurturing, Kira believed she had left the past behind. As she approached the morning of her Jedi trials, the sights that haunted her childhood nightmares had returned. She took a steadying breath, then yielded to a slow, deep, rhythmic breathing from one of the calming techniques her Master had taught her. As she did so, another consciousness brushed hers, and she winced at the intrusion. Only one person in the Jedi Temple would be attuned enough to notice her shift in emotion during early hours of the morning, and it was not somebody she wished to see in such a vulnerable state. She suspected that he would not be giving her a choice.

The rain stopped as she finished her breathing exercise. She stepped to the open window to watch the brilliant light of the rising sun cut through tendrils of mist as it streamed into her room. Her quarters were modest, with little space and few personal effects, but it had been home for the past fifteen years. She reached down to touch a rough doll sewn together from materials she had gathered from the jungle. Leia had shown her how to do that, and the memory of her patient voice and kind smile surfaced against the sequestered darkness.

While she gazed across the awakening jungle, listening to the dawn chorus of myriad creatures, a tentative knock on the door broke the silence. She closed her eyes, steeling herself for the inquiry, then spoke, "It's open."

She did not need to turn to know who had entered, as she had sensed his presence even as she was working to soothe herself. Ben Solo had a knack for attuning to whatever emotional state she was in - a byproduct of growing up so close to him. When she first arrived from Jakku, Leia and Luke Skywalker had spent a great deal of time helping her learn to speak, but it was a while before she could use words. Ben had forged a non-verbal connection with her as a young child in a way no adult could accomplish. For a long time, Ben understood her better than everyone around her, many of whom found her dark, secretive, silent manner unnerving. So adept had he become at reading her shifting emotions, that it delayed the necessity of Kira having to speak. Kira in turn had learned to communicate with him silently through her emotions. The Jedi Masters tasked with training the children often chided their inattention in lessons before Luke had recognized they were talking to each other through a mental connection – a connection that the Jedi henceforth discouraged. As a child, it was a remarkable comfort to be understood, soothed, and accepted. As an adult there were times where she wished that she could be as opaque to Ben as she had learned to be to the rest of her peers.

"I sensed a disturbance," Ben explained.

She sighed, knowing it was little use denying anything. "I had a dream. It wasn't. . . pleasant," she admitted.

Ben considered her for a moment, and she could sense his impulse to press for details butting against his memory of past conversations about minding his own business. He had inherited his mother's eyes, but he had his father's build and temperament. A lifetime of training had refined that temperament, but now and again, especially during lightsaber sparring, a hint of his father's casual arrogance would shine through. In addition to the poise that came from attaining the level of Jedi knight, Ben exuded his mother's regal bearing. She had envied the way he carried himself as close to the ideal of Jedi knight as any Jedi could. He was regal, noble, confident, dashing, and universally liked and respected. She had shown herself highly adept, but her brooding, aloof temperament unnerved her peers.

"It's been a long time since you used the protocol," he observed.

Annoyance flashed within her. "I wish you wouldn't do that, Ben," she admonished.

Ben, abashed, looked out the window toward the rising sun, then stated, "Sometimes I'm not sure I can help it. The dream was so strong it woke me up."

She turned toward the window, seeking a way of avoiding the conversation without seeming rude. Ben seemed to sense the conflict, but she could tell he was about to walk right past the sign she was giving him. He spoke again, "If you're worried about the trials, you shouldn't be. You're the most gifted Padawan Uncle Luke has ever trained. You're going to pass."

She searched her feelings and saw that only part of her anxiety was related to the trials. She had been well trained, first by Leia and Luke themselves, then later by a series of different Masters who helped her hone her considerable talents. Her final master, Master Oppo Rancisis, had put her name forth for consideration one year to the date from Ben passing his test. He had expressed confidence in her, although it was impossible for her to ignore that some of the other Masters harbored doubts. She had always been attuned to the subtle differences with which they had treated her. She had only ever felt she had belonged when she trained deep within the jungle with Ben. The other Jedi respected her, but few went out of their way to talk to her, know her, train with her. Ben had tried to smooth over the differences in how the others treated her, but it was impossible for her not to conclude that most Jedi tolerated her rather than embrace her.

She chose not to respond to Ben immediately, but asked, "Has Master Luke returned?"

As shadow passed across Ben's face, which she interpreted, correctly, as annoyance. "No," Ben muttered.

The curt answer reinforced her interpretation. Luke had been absent far more often than usual lately, and she knew that Ben was annoyed primarily that he did not know what Luke was up to, but also because Luke was likely to miss her trial. Kira noticed that she was disappointed as well, but she swallowed that disappointment down against the rising tide of anxiety swelling within her. "Should we go down to breakfast," Ben asked?

She nodded tentatively, following him from the room.

***

Since the reformation of the Jedi Order, the Jedi had lived on the planet Yavin-4, quietly going about the business of training new foundlings, and working to piece together old knowledge to build the foundation for a new, enduring order. The Order occupied an ancient temple near the old Rebel base nearly destroyed by the Empire 25 years ago. Luke Skywalker had chosen it for its strong connection to both the light side and the dark side of the Force. While some of the surviving Jedi of the old Order struggled with the break from centuries of tradition in housing the Order on Coruscant, Kira had to admit that the exuberance of life and the brilliance of the Force in their quiet corner of the galaxy was multitudes more comfortable than the din and the chaos of the capitol. She sometimes wondered to herself during history lessons whether the disconnect from the natural world was one factor in Darth Sidious's ability to fool the Jedi so thoroughly and for so long.

Kira entered the great chamber, a towering stone cavern constructed by a long-dead, ancient species with only modest improvements from the new inhabitants. The assembled Jedi Order sat within, arranged in a descending set of stone benches arching around a circular mosaic in the center of the hall. The Order was still small, with twelve Masters, about twice as many Jedi, and another two dozen Padawans. Despite only being a fraction of the Order at the height of its powers, the Jedi Order's recovery from the great massacre at the end of the Clone Wars had been robust. The mixture of Jedi surviving the Empire's purges mixed amongst new Jedi found since the Battle of Endor combined with Skywalker's progressive philosophies gleaned from lessons imparted by the Departed Masters, had breathed a new vitality into the Jedi code – albeit a vitality that the older Masters tended to resist.

As Kira toward the mosaic in the center of the room where twelve stone seats sat arrayed in a semi-circle, she could sense the gaze of each of the Jedi and Padawans, and she kept her gaze forward to tune out the uncomfortable scrutiny. Upon reaching the dais, Kira surveyed the dozen stone seats, but only counted eleven Jedi. Master Oppo Rancisis coiled within the Grand Master's chair as he assumed Master Skywalker's duties for the trial. With a snake-like body and serpentine face obscured by a thick beard, Rancisis was one of the few Jedi Masters who survived the Clone Wars, escaping notice as he lived in obscurity disconnected from the Force. From the time that Skywalker found him, he had served as a critical ally and architect in reforming the Order alongside other surviving Jedi, including Ahsoka Tano, the late Cal Kestis, Cere Junda, and Coleman Kcaj. Kira had always sensed tension between the two, with Skywalker pulling the Order further to a new vision of what it meant to be a Jedi and Master Rancisis attempting to pull it closer to the old orthodoxy. Kira supposed that such tension was good for the Order's growth, but she knew that Rancisis' orthodoxy assured that her trial would be rigid, rigorous, and with a heavy emphasis on letting go of attachment – something that Kira had always struggled with, and something that Master Rancisis had never failed to criticize her for.

As she stood before the eleven Jedi Masters, Master Rancisis spoke in a halting, wheezing, sibilant voice. "Kira of Jakku. Long have you trained; strong have you become. As your Master, I deem you ready to undergo the Jedi Trials. Are you prepared?"

"Yes," Kira replied.

"Do you renounce your former attachments and entered Jedi service willingly?"

"Yes," Kira replied. She sensed a wave of discomfort as the Jedi responded internally to Master Rancisis's deviation from Skywalker's preferred trial protocol. She was unsurprised; Rancisis had been a Master for centuries. He was not one for flexibility.

"Do you renounce the dark side and all its temptations?"

"Yes," Kira replied.

"And are you now prepared to face your own dark side and to reject its hold over you?"

"Yes," Kira replied, and her acknowledgement echoed through the chamber.

Master Rancisis gestured toward an opening on the far side of the chamber. There, a twisted tree grew out of the wall, its roots sunk deep into the earth below the temple. Kira had been aware of the tree since the beginning of her time in the Order, having watched trials before. A Padawan would enter a hole at the base of the tree and face a vision; of what, she could not be sure, as no Jedi ever appeared willing to discuss what they experienced. Through the years, the tree had always pulled at a corner of her mind, whispering uncertainty of what she might face when her time came.

Following her Master's gesture, she crossed the chamber floor to the base of the tree. She paused, looking back at the assembled Jedi Order. Ben nodded reassuringly from the crowd, a smile of confidence on his face. Steeling herself, she entered the hole at the base of the tree.

She climbed down a muddy, mossy staircase into the darkness of the cave. She closed her eyes, reaching out through the Force to get a sense of the cave's topography. She worked carefully over twisted roots and pools of standing water on the cave's floor. A sudden prickle along her spine drew her awareness to a presence at the end of the cave. She opened her eyes, finding the form of Ben Solo standing before her. But it was not the Ben that she knew. Scars deformed the right side of his face, with one of his eyes milky and dead from injury. His face held a cold, haunted, hard expression. His brown robe and cream tunic were gone, replaced with a black cloak. She approached tentatively, whispering aloud, "Ben?"

He did not smile or acknowledge her in greeting. Instead, he withdrew a lightsaber from within the folds of his cloak. Upon removing it, he ignited it, and a red blade emerged in place of his usual green blade. He stood silently, awaiting a command. Suddenly, every hair on the back of her neck stood erect as a jolt of fear ran down her spine in response to a rattling, demented cackle – a sound from her deepest nightmares.

Behind Ben, a new vision materialized. Emperor Palpatine, hunched and aged, slumped within a chair. He leered at Kira from beneath his hood, laughing at her fear and her helplessness. At the sound of the laughter, she seemed to freeze with an inexplicable paralysis. The Emperor uttered a guttural command, "DO IT!"

Ben responded immediately. Kira had not noticed that Leia Organa stood bound against the wall of the cave. She was pleading with Ben to spare her life and turn against the Emperor. Kira wanted to act, but her body was paralyzed; her breath was trapped in her chest. Luke was also bound on the opposite side of the cave. Ben turned to Luke first, plunging his lightsaber through his uncle's heart.

Kira attempted to scream, but she remained paralyzed. After watching Skywalker die, the Emperor turned his focus back to her. "Weak. Perhaps they should have left you to die in the desert." Kira struggled against the invisible paralysis, wishing to run. Ben regarded her coldly, without feeling, as he awaited his next command. Leia continued to plead with Ben. "AGAIN," ordered the Emperor.

Ben turned toward his mother, this time reaching out with his hand to choke her. Leia gasped for breath as her son held his grip without mercy. Kira struggled and pushed against her paralysis. Suddenly, a fierce rage surged through her. She was able to wrench herself free from her paralysis.

The Emperor laughed, then stated, with amusement, "Good! Feel your hatred. He will destroy everything you love." Leia continued to gasp, and it was clear she was moments from death. Kira felt control and strength returning to her body as she tapped into her anger.

The Emperor laughed while Ben choked his mother through the Force, before catching his breath and growling through his malicious amusement, "Then, he will destroy you." Leia's body collapsed, limp, her life depleted.

"The great mistake. All will fall – because of you." The Emperor spread his arms and laughed deeply. Ben turned toward her, prepared to advance.

The rage within Kira peaked, and from deep inside her surged a forbidden impulse. She turned away from her practiced calm and peace and touched a deep well of rage and pain. From her fingertips emerged a cascade of blue-white lightning. . .

The vision vanished suddenly, and the relative brilliance of the chamber stunned her senses. Her eyes opened, and she realized that she was no longer in the cave; she had somehow returned to the mosaic before the Jedi Masters.

The last flickerings of lightning arced across the dais, entwining around the writhing form of Jedi Master Oppo Rancisis. Suddenly, Kira was aware that, somehow, she had left the cavern, walked across the room, and found herself amongst the Masters again. But unlike everything in the vision, the lightning had been real. Jedi Master Ferrer Melso stood, lightsaber ignited, and had caught some of the lightning on his blade. He regarded her with grim disapproval and fear. Master Rancisis had caught the bulk of the blast, and he twitched weakly as the last of the lightning dissipated.

There was a stunned, shocked silence. Kira could feel the eyes of every Jedi in the room trained on her. She made eye contact with Ben – the real Ben, whole and uninjured – and the sight of him was unbearable to her. The rage within her was still pulsing, and she still felt the urge to strike out and attack. As she gained a momentary advantage from that urge, she turned and fled from the room.