Unspeakable Past

Vanitas had wanted to find out more about his past.

What had happened before he was taken to the Demon Extermination Corps by Dominique and Eleanor? Where did he live? He didn't know his origin story all that well. That didn't mean he didn't have any wishes to know more about his life as a children or who his parents were. He did but it wasn't as if he could find about it all too easily just by wishing. He needed to go step by step and trace back his origin and the main purpose of the lofty goal he had set for himself. As such, he was trying to recollect his memories by going through the past closet to him. He would trace back by collecting the fragments of his fragile but precious memory until he manages to piece together everything. And that was why he was searching for the hut.

He wasn't sure where exactly the hut he had lived in was. He knew just one thing, however, and that was the presence of a large river beside the place he lived. He had asked about the river, The Heiros, to Eleanor.

The Heiros river branched off into two different paths from the nothern side of the Kingdom of Eonia, forming a circle surrounding the large forest until they eventually rejoined in the now ruined Kingdom of Belfast. In the north, the river had the forest on the right and the ruined structures of the city nearby on the left. From what Vanitas could recall there were no such structures near the makeshit hut he lived in. There was just the forest, the river, and nothing else. Thus he marked that area off. The west had a dungeon. The east had the defensive walls at the very end. They were out as well. So the only direction left was the south. Thus, he had taken on this scouting mission and asked Eleanor to take him to the south river section.

Luckily he did find the hut. The sound of the river was the same as he had heard in his ears whenever he tried to recall the surroundings.

He made his way in with familiar steps and searched the room.

There on the wall near to the riverside he found some scribblings in the same runic language that was carved on his body.

He had brought a quill and a sheet of paper with him to note down any details that he could find. There was no telling when he might have to use the power of his devil again and lose his memories. He didn't even know what the memories he will lose will be. As such, if he found something that could provide a breakthrough and ended up forgetting it afterward, he will be back to square one again. But if he records it in a sheet of paper, he will have the important information even if he did end up losing his memories which would help him progress faster.

He took out his quill and started writing everything he had seen on the wall.

There were many things written there in runic language. Like the fact that this was the place he lived in. That he had a contract with a powerful demon and the demon used his memories as fuel to give him more power. What the memory the demon will devour was not sure however, the more power he needed the more stronger memories it will devour. There were things he knew and there were few things he didn't know. However, there was one particular thing that caught his eye. Towards the right corner of the wall, there was something written there. It wasn't complete and parts of the letters were missing as a few pieces of mud had fallen off. From what he could make, it was suppossed to be a name of sorts. He tried to make sense of the name by putting together whattever was available.

'Vlad?'

The name formed in his head and he felt goosebumps all over his body. That name gave him a mixture of fear and reverence. The name sounded familiar to his lips. Who was he? What was he? How do I know him? Why do I feel this strangeness? These questions ran in his brain but he was interrupted by a question from Eleanor.

The two talked about how he knew these languages. Vanitas managed to lie his way out with excuses that he didn't know and understand the language but rather he was just copying them thinking that it will be useful in future if they could crack the meaning of these words.

He was heaving a sigh of relief that he had somehow managed to evade her questioning mixed with regret over lying that he had to deceive her but Eleanor asked another question.

"Hey, Vanitas, you lived in this hut before, didn't you?"

Before he could ask why do you think so, Eleanor explained the reason behind her question.

"You were searching for this place from the start, right? You even asked me to guide you to this part of the forest where you knew this hut was. You went inside the hut with familiar steps and had also brought a quill and a sheet of blank paper with you. That means you expected that there will be something you will have to note down once you reached your destination. That means you knew about this hut and maybe you had lived in this hut. Also, remember we found you in this forest?"

She laid out all the pieces in front of him and given the amount of logical reasons and explanations she had presented him with, he possibly couldb't refute her with half-baked lies like before.

Thus, he decided to admit it.

"Yes. I did live here for a few days while I was on a journey."

However, the fact was that he didn't knew whether this was a journey like he said or his permamnet residence. He did had doubts about the latter as there weren't much things that could sustain him for much longer. Not to mention, this being a permanent residence of his may paint him in a shady light.

"I see." Eleanor said.

"Vanitas, I had been meaning to ask you about this. But where did you come from? You said you were in a journey, right? What is that journey you speak of?"

Her question hurt right where his wounds were.

The questions she asked him were the very questions he had been asking himself.

Where had he come from? Where did he live before coming to this forest? Who were his parents? How was his childhood? Who is the girl that he keeps seeing in his dreams? What was that stretch of white that haunted his dreams every night? Why did the carvings in his body tell him to kill the seven greater demons? What was the purpose of that? Who did the carvings in he firts place? That wasn't his handwriting.

These questions kept piling up but he had yet to find the answer to any of them. He had no choice but to keep looking for traces of his past that could provide some sort of hint to find the answer he has been seeking.

But, for now, he had no answer for himself and nor any for Eleanor to give.

"Sorry. I...can't tell you about it." Not because he didn't want to, but because he couldn't even if he wanted to.

"There are some things people don't want others to go around asking them, aren't there? Things they want to hide from others. A past that they don't want to expose."

He had meant that last sentence as an addition to his excuse. At most he had expected her to accept his excuse and stop questioning him about it. But, the response he got from her was a bit perplexing.

"Yeah. I get that. I also have something I don't want people to know."

She gave a forlorn smile. As if she was trying to hide a lot of emotions behind her thin, quivering lips.

'I see. Even she has a past she hasn't shared with others.'

That was unexpected but Vanitas found himself believeing her immediately. There were times when she behaved a bit unnaturally and times when she was shaken up. She would lie to get through it but Vanitas had noticed such patterns in her behavior that made him belive her words that he indeed was hiding things from others.

'Everyone has a past, don't they? Whether they want or not. They have a past and no matter how heavy that burden is, they will have to carry that burden until they die.'

Vanitas was doing the same. Although he had no idea right now about what his past was, he was carrying its weight as carved in his body. Eleanor was doing the same. He felt a sense of kinship with her over such a simple similarity and he broke into a smile.

"Let's get back now." Vanitas said.

"You work is done here?"

"Yeah."

The two then walked out of the small hut and back into the forest.

Just as they were walking however, they heard the howl of a monster followed by the scream of humans.