Sister

"Damn it, Lucila! What are you doing here?" I was distracted when I felt Lucian's grip on my arm and the concern in his voice.

I looked up at him. Even though I'm 5 ft and 5 inches, I'm still small for Lucian's height of over six feet.

I couldn't stop myself from hugging him. "Luci..."

"Damn, babe. What are you doing here?" even though I was angry, I could hear his concern.

I couldn't stop crying. "You're cheating. You're cheating." I said, crying. Lucian is the only guy who can make me cry. Only him.

"Shh. Hold on," he said, trying to calm me down. "What do you mean I'm cheating?"

I shook my head. I know I have no right to tell him he is cheating on me. He doesn't need to take responsibility for my pain right now.

"Why don't you go straight to the office? You know I miss you," he says.

I looked at him. Heart, how can I save you when he is like this?

"I want to surprise you, Luci. I miss you too." I told him, half lying and half truth.

He kissed my forehead. "I'm going to take you home. What are you doing here? You know I'm worried?" he says.

See? Tell me, how can I stop falling when he's like this?

Whoever the girl Lucian loves is, I'll make sure Lucian doesn't end up with her. No one is deserving but me. I'm the only one for Lucian. Just me.

He took me to the hotel where Phoenix was staying. "Just stay here..." I said to him when he said he would go home soon because he had something important to attend to. For sure, that woman is the only one he will take home!

"Damn it, Lucila! Don't get drunk next time. What did I tell you? Stop going into a bar, especially when you're alone!" he growled.

He was trying to unlock the door when I placed my hands on his neck so I could kiss him. I want him so bad. Bad that I'll do everything to make him mine. Even the most desperate moves I can ever make.

I felt that he was surprised by what I did. "Lucilla."

"Lucian, please." I kissed him again. He held me by both my arms and pulled me away from him.

"Lucila, what are you fucking doing?" he said angrily. He cursed. He opened the door and pulled me away.

I know I'm desperate... But... I really love Lucian that I can do everything just to get him!

Lucian cursed again. He ran his hand through his hair. He's always doing that when he's frustrated. "See? You're fucking drunk! What do you think will happen when you do this to other people? They can take advantage of you!" he snarled.

No one else, Lucian. Only for you. I will do it only with you. I will not go with anyone. Because I love only you.

I approached him again and kissed him. I am ready to give myself to him. For 24 years of my existence, I have had no boyfriend since birth. I have never been kissed. He was my first kiss.

I have never been in love. Only with him. I only want to give myself to him. I love him that much.

He cursed again and pushed me away from him. "Lucila, stop it! You're drunk!"

"I am not, Lucian. I know what I'm doing!" I said and tried to kiss him. He didn't know how to push me. Lucian respects me so much. He treated me special... Like how he treats his girl cousins.

"Please, Lucila. You're drunk. You're going to kill me if you're sober. I know that for sure." he said as he pushed me away from him again.

"Lucian!" Phoenix growled when he saw us.

We looked at Phoenix when he went inside. "Fuck you, Lucian! What are you doing to Lucila?" he said furiously and pulled me away from Lucian. Shit! Why is Phoenix's timing wrong?

He thought Lucian was taking advantage of me; that's why he is angry.

"Damn it! I'm not doing anything!" Lucian said.

"Damn you! You are doing this to Lucila in my hotel room? And damn it! She's like a sister to us! What are you fucking doing?" he retorted and grabbed me by the arm to keep me away from Lucian. "You're just so confused that you're going to turn to someone else? Damn you!"

I can no longer understand what they are talking about because my world has turned upside down.

I woke up with a headache the next day. I held my head and recalled what happened last night.

My eyes widened. Shit!

What I did was embarrassing to Lucian! Damn it! When I am drunk, I lose my mind.

I bit my lip. What should I say to Lucian? I know he didn't like what I did last night. What a shame, Lucila!

"Finally, you're awake." I looked at Lucian when I heard him. I immediately got up. I held my head because I felt my world spin. I heard him swear. "Are you alright?" he asked worriedly.

"I'm sorry, Luci. I didn't mean what happened last night." I said, ashamed and full of regret. I don't want to spoil his opinion of me.

He laughed. "It's okay."

Lucian thinks I didn't mean what I did last night. He knows that I am not that type of person. I'm a bit hurt because I know that he will never take me seriously.

"I'm expecting worse that you'll beat me," he says. He came closer and kissed me on the forehead.

"What the hell? Don't come any closer. I still stink." I said, annoyed.

He laughed harder and ruffled my hair. "You're always my baby sister." he smiled.

My heart broke. His baby sister. His sister. Damn it!

I am just a sister to him. That will never be changed even I do anything! How cruel that reality is!