5

chapter 5

The following three months flew by, and soon Zumwraek was back on the streets again, walking slowly around town, looking for places to live. He spent most of his time hanging out on the side of highways and parks, sleeping on benches under trees and standing behind dumpsters, watching everything around him unfold. He didn't spend all of his time in the streets though, he still managed to meet and talk to some people if he was lucky. But even in those situations he hardly spoke to any of them. Not once, in all these months, had he gotten any money, except for a few times when they had given him a couple of bucks to buy a few items he needed like a sandwich for lunch or something like that. It was almost laughable, he had lived on the streets for most of his life, but apparently people weren't too interested in knowing about it. All they wanted to do was ignore him, and most of the time that suited him perfectly because nobody talked to him anyway. Not like they had much chance to anyway. He knew he shouldn't feel guilty about that, it wasn't anybody's fault that he wasn't normal, but he did. Sometimes he felt as though he was the freak, the weirdo that no one liked. No matter what he did, no matter how nice he was to others he always seemed to attract people who hated him. He was just trying to protect his brother, trying to make sure that he wouldn't end up dead and alone like he was. Maybe if he wasn't around his brother wouldn't need to worry about anything else, maybe it would just be easier. Then again…the only way that would happen would be if his brother actually got killed, and there was nothing he could do to prevent that, there was no point in thinking about it. So he ignored it, he just ignored it.

For a moment Zumwraek wondered why he kept doing that. If his brother's life had never ended, then why did he have to carry on existing? How long would it be until someone killed him? Or worse? He stopped himself from wondering, he couldn't let himself imagine what would happen if his brother died, no matter how unlikely it was, he would still find himself worrying about it. It would just make things harder. It would force him to start caring about the world again, and he hated himself for that. He was happy in his life with the Felt, he loved the people he met there and they loved him. They never judged him, nobody had told him to leave since he had joined, no one made fun of him for liking boys like they had done when he was growing up. The only thing they treated him like was a freak that belonged nowhere near them. But they loved him, even though they knew he could never become their son like he hoped they would. There were days where he missed those days, when they could all sit together and laugh together, when they would play cards and eat together, sometimes just talking and joking, laughing like crazy at their silly antics. Those memories were the best he had during this last week. The only good memories left he had in this messed up life, he couldn't let anyone take that from him.

The next evening Zumwraek decided that tonight he was gonna visit his favorite cafe. It wasn't far from his apartment either and it would be pretty convenient to stop by there after work. However, when he stepped outside of the building after getting off of his job for the night he found the place surrounded by cops and ambulances. The sight reminded him of the police officers from earlier and so instead of approaching the cafe he went to the side entrance and knocked softly on its door. After a minute or two the door opened, revealing a woman holding a baby on her hip and an infant who had fallen asleep in her arms.

"Hey, how come there are so many cops and ambulances around here?" Zumwraek asked quietly.

"There has been a break in at a convenience store nearby," She replied. "We just called the cops and sent them over to check it out and see what happened."

"What's going on in there, is anybody hurt?"

"Yeah, there is one injured and another two people taken into custody, but none seriously, although we suspect that there may be more inside. We aren't sure how many were involved."

Zumwraek nodded understandingly and turned his head back in the direction of the police cars parked outside the convenience store. "So, are you gonna go inside now?" he asked.

She nodded. "I guess I will, thanks for letting me know," she said quietly, looking up at him slightly with her bright blue eyes. "By the way…thanks for letting me know."

"No problem," Zumwraek smiled warmly and then glanced over towards the store again, noticing the police car parked right by the doors to the convenience store parking lot. Something was definitely wrong.