Untamed Desire: Part IX

INDIGO'S POV

~She's looking at me. I can feel it.~

I entered the classroom, she was sitting in the same spot as yesterday. I walked to the opposite side of the room and pulled out a chair. As the professor continued with her lesson, I felt eyes on me from time to time. I glanced up until my eyes met Lily's. At that moment, I wanted to rush to her side and taste her lips again. My fantasy was then interrupted by the memory of what she said to me. My heart ached as I clenched my fists.

~Why did my mate have to be human? Why couldn't I just have mated with a wolf from my pack? At least I wouldn't have to deal with being rejected. The moon goddess must hate me.~

-The moon goddess does not hate you! Our mate is perfect! We need to give her more time.-

~I doubt there is enough time in the world, for her to change her mind. She doesn't want us, Shadow. We're just going to have to accept that.~

Within a blink of an eye, the class was already over. I immediately arose from my seat and bolted out of the classroom. I didn't want to be in the same room with Lilyanna anymore. Her scent was lingering in the air.

~Is she following me? Why?~

"Indy! There you are, man!" Evan patted me on the back. "You should come over to my place and hang out!"

"I don't know, Evan." I snarled.

"Shit Indy, what the fuck is wrong with you? You seemed pissed."

"I don't want to talk about it." I took a deep breath, Lily's sweetly intoxicating scent was getting closer. I turned around and found her staring up at me, but as soon as our eyes locked onto each other she glanced down at the floor.

"Indigo, I was hoping we could talk."

"About what Lily?" My body tensed as my mouth became dry. "I thought you made it clear you wanted nothing to do with me?"

"Well..." she glimpsed back into my eyes. She nervously bit her lip as she frantically rubbed her thumbs. "We haven't picked a book for our final yet and I thought we should pick one early. That way we have plenty of enough time to complete the assignment."

~Wow, she only wanted to talk to me because of that stupid final. I guess she was telling the truth. I'm nothing to her.~

"I see. Is that all you wanted Lilyanna?"

"N..."

"Oh, Indigo!" Kristen from the party strutted forward waving in my direction.

~Fuck me, I forgot all about her. Why did I agree to go on that stupid date this morning?~

Kristen laced her arm around mine. I looked down at her and forced a smile trying to be polite.

"Are you ready for our date handsome?" Kristen batted her eyelashes and leaned in closer. I turned towards Lily, her body tensed as her fists were clenched. Her eyes were glaring at Kristen with murderous intent.

~Oh, she's angry.~

-That means she's having second thoughts about us! Quick, trash this hoe and go over to our mate!-

~No.~

-No! But...but she's our mate!-

~She is...she's our mate that played with us. So now I'm going to play with her.~

"Of course, just give me a moment to talk to my classmate."

"Who's she?" Kristen said mockingly.

"No one, just my partner from class." My wolf whimpered, hating that I called Lily 'no one'.

"Oh, I see. Well, I'll wait and stand by your car then. See you soon!" Kristen looked over at Lily, softly waving as she strode off. I glimpsed at Lily, her body still tensed up and her teeth clenched.

~Fuck, did I go too far? I promised myself I wouldn't make things worse by doing stupid shit while I'm angry.~

I looked at my mate my chest tightened causing sharp, aching pain.

"What were you about to say, Lily?"

"Nothing, never mind. I'll just leave you be with your date. Plus I have a dinner I have to go to anyway." She snapped and turned her back, walking away from me with a quickness. My wolf stared at her as she left, he curled in a ball and began to pout.

-What's wrong with you Indigo? She was trying to tell us something and you blew her off!-

~I know Shadow, and I'm sorry.~

"What the hell was that?" I turned toward Evan, his eyebrow raised. "I thought you didn't care for Kristen and now you're going on a date with her? And who was that other girl?"

"It's none of your business, Evan!" I growled.

"What the fuck is your problem? Ever since that party, you have been on a roller coaster of emotions. What happened after you left?"

"Nothing happened ok! So can you fucking drop it!"

"Why the fuck are you so cold? I might as well call you the winter prince!"

"I'm not in the mood for one of your jokes, Evan!"

"Whatever ice boy. Text me when you stop being an asshole." Evan stormed off into the parking lot.

~Fuck, what the hell is wrong with me? I need to control my anger.~

-You're angry because you need your mate. We both need her.-

~Yeah, you're probably right. But right now that's not possible. Let's just get home and we can cool down there.~

I started to walk over to my car. I bowed my head and rummaged in my pockets for my car keys.

"There you are, handsome!"

~Shit! Why did I agree to go on a date with her?~

-Because you weren't thinking and you were hurt.-

~How can you remain so calm, Shadow?~

-Easy, I'm too upset to be angry.-

"Hey, Kristen."

"So, where are you going to take me?" Kristen leaned over the front of my car, swirling her finger on the car's hood.

~Is it too late to cancel? Ugh, but it's not Kristen's fault I said yes. I'll go on this one date, and that's it.~

"How about dinner? What sounds good to you?"

"Hmmm..." I swear to the goddess that I saw Kristen's butt wiggle. "I'm craving a good burger right now, how bout we go to Tommy's diner?"

"Sure, that sounds good." I shied away from her.

"Great!" she squealed as she jumped off of the car, walking over to the passenger's side. "Mind unlocking your car?"

"Yeah, give me a moment." I grabbed my car fob and unlocked the car. We both entered and I drove us to the diner's parking lot. Kristen quickly unbuckled herself and greeted me at my side of the car. As soon as I stood outside Kristen wrapped her arm around mine and dragged me into the diner. We were seated and given menus and water to start with. I glanced down at the table not saying a word. I heard the tapping of fingernails against our wooden table.

"So... um are we going to talk at all? Or are we gonna stare off into space." I broke out of my trance and glanced up at Kristen. Her cheek was resting on her hand as her elbow rested on the table. Her eyes were glazed over with boredom.

"I'm sorry. I don't go on dates much."

"Why?" she squinted, her mouth slightly gaped. She then glanced me up and down with a flirtatious smirk. "I don't see how a handsome man such as yourself would have any trouble finding dates."

"It's not that I have trouble finding dates. I've just never been fond of them."

"Never been fond of dates!? Why? Don't you want a special someone of your own?"

"Of course, but I knew that I would never find her by dating. I knew that when I found her, I would know right away that she was my special someone."

~I did find her, and I lost her.~

"That's awesome!" I glanced over at a sweet familiar voice. I saw Lilyanna in a booth across from us having dinner with a slightly older woman. The slight scent of honey and lilies wafted through the air.

~Shit, I must have been so distracted that I didn't even notice she was here.~

"I'm assuming I'm not the woman you're looking for." I glanced back at Kristen, this time she wasn't being flirtatious. She was staring at me with kindness and empathy.

"I'm sorry." I lowered my head. "I don't know what I was thinking."

"Hmm, let me guess. You wanted to make your ex mad so you agreed to go on a date with me. Am I right?"

"Yeah, something like that." I chuckled.

"Then I think we should do ourselves both a favor and end this...date."

"I think you're right, I'll take you home." I glanced at Lilyanna one more time. The thought of us never being together hurt. Sometimes I would wonder what it would be like if we weren't fighting. If we bonded like normal mates instead of distancing ourselves from each other. I took Kristen home and sat in my car for a bit. Contemplating the situation I now found myself in. I pulled out my phone and pulled up my messages deciding to text Evan.

Wednesday 13 Jul- 06:34 pm

Hey Evan, I'm no longer an asshole. Can I still come over and hang out?

Hmm...I don't know. You still sound like an asshole to me. 06:36 pm

I'm sorry. I haven't been in the right mindset lately. 06:39 pm

What the hell is wrong? I've never seen you act like this. 06:41 pm

It's hard to explain over text. 06:42 pm

Then get your ass over here. I'll save you a beer. 06:43 pm

Thanks. On my way now. 06:44pm

I started the car back up and headed up to Evans's apartment.

~I really need to talk to someone about this. What the fuck am I going to do about Lily?~