Conversations At 4am.

Christian bursts out laughing.

I'm lost here.

"Why did you do that?" He asks amidst his laughter.

"Do what?" I ask gently.

"Hiccup."

"I hiccup when I'm nervous." I suddenly felt embarrassed.

"Why would you want to be nervous?" He pulled away from me and I suddenly felt cold.

Like my comfort had been taken away from me.

I didn't answer, so he held out his hand. "C'mon, let's get you to bed."

I take his hand and he pulls me up. Why do I feel like he's trying to avoid the last few seconds that just happened?

I mean, I saw him stare at my lips for a moment, why didn't he just lean in and kiss me? Why didn't I kiss him?

"Do you want me to get you some clothes or do you want to sleep in those?" He nods towards the clothes I had on.

"I'd love a change of clothes."

He nods. "Let me see what I can find for you inside." He turns and walks into his room while my legs suddenly went weak.

I had to sit on the arm of the couch so I wouldn't fall.

Christian comes back with a top in hand and holds it out to me. "This is the largest top I could find."

"Largest? I thought you'd look for something my size. Or smaller."

"None of my clothes are your size. So just wear something that's gonna reach your knee and that you're going to be comfortable in."

"Thanks." I mumbled.

"You can sleep in the guest room." I glance at the guest room and at his room.

Something deep down in me wants to sleep in his room.

"Goodnight then." I muttered and walked past him towards the room.

"Dream of me tonight." He shouts behind me and I flip him my middle finger.

I closed the door gently and sighed.

We didn't kiss. We didn't kiss.

But why do I feel like we did?

I walked to the bathroom to shower away all the dirty thoughts in my mind.

Sleeping was even worse. I couldn't help but keep tossing around. I couldn't sleep, each time I tried to close my eyes, our little moment kept replaying in my head.

Not sure if I can call it that though.

~~~

CHRISTIAN'S POV.

I laid in my bed staring at the ceiling. Just laid there, thinking about nothing, doing nothing, and seeing nothing.

How was I supposed to do anything when she's sleeping in the next room, probably half naked on the bed-

"Oh god." I grumbled as I shifted to my side.

This isn't going to do.

I got off the bed and out of the room. Hers was right in front, and I had to do everything in my power to walk away from there. I had to restrain myself from opening the door, and taking her.

I walked into the kitchen to get water to cool my nerves.

"Get a grip Christian. This isn't good."

Why did I even say that? If I kiss her, she wouldn't object?

Of course she would! She was half drunk and didn't know what she was saying. And stupid me was about to take that as an opportunity.

I saw her figure standing a few feet from me. All the lights in the house were off and I didn't bother to put it on when I came in. Not sure I'd like to put it on either now that she's in here too.

"Hey." Was the only thing I could muster out.

"Hi." Her voice was a little faint.

"Can't sleep?" I ask her as she walks forward.

"Yeah. Could you turn on the lights? I don't want to fall over anything."

I walk to the switch and on the kitchen lights. It came on and she smiled.

"Thanks." She walks to the fridge and takes out a bottle of water.

"So should I say it's the caffeine or the beer?" I leaned against the wall.

"What do you mean?" She goes to sit on one of the stools by the counter and my eyes couldn't stop themselves from going towards her thighs.

The top had ridden up a little which exposed more of her thighs and I cleared my throat, looking away.

She chuckles. "I'm not even sure anymore. I'm sleepy, like I really want to sleep, but each time I close my eyes, I can't seem to fall asleep."

Same here but each time, a certain person's face fills up my mind.

"Wanna drink since we are both having the same problem?" I stare at her, making sure my eyes didn't wander down this time.

"I don't think I should drink. I have a class in the morning."

"Darling," I caught myself saying. "It's four in the morning, you haven't had a single sleep and I'm offering you a midnight drink. Trust me, you'd be knocked out by six. There's no way in heaven you're going for the class."

"Do you have a class tomorrow?"

"I have an eight o'clock class in the morning."

"And you're going to be there?"

"I, on the other hand, can't afford to miss my classes."

I can't afford to get an earful from my old man again.

"But you're going to be sleepy all day."

I moved away from the wall since I couldn't stop staring and leaned against the fridge instead.

That way, the counter would serve as a barrier.

I shrug. "I'm already used to it. I hardly sleep. I have a hard time sleeping. This is a normal night for me."

"You get sleep deprived?" She seemed surprised about it.

I nod. "Yeah."

"Since when?"

"For as long as I can remember." I lean towards the counter. "But why don't we talk about it over some whiskey?"

Her eyes widened. "Shut up, you do not have whiskey."

I smile. "Wanna find out?" I turned and opened the fridge. I brought out a half empty bottle of the white drink.

"Ohmygod Christian. Why would you leave a bottle of whiskey in the fridge."

"Why are you talking like I've done a bad thing?" I ask her.

"It is bad. Where did you even get it from?"

"Leftovers from Billie's boyfriend's party."

"You've kept it since then?"

"I can't seem to let it go to waste. It's quality alcohol."

"I heard you only drink that when you need to drown heavy problems."

I think my problems are way too heavy to be drowned.

"I just take a sip here and there when I can't seem to sleep."

"I'm sure I can go past a gulp."

"Wanna test that theory?" I ask with a smile on my face.

Changing the subject and avoiding my sleeping problem is the best way to go now.

Not sure I want to talk about that problem yet.