The Underworld Government

(AN: I got into college and I've been kinda busy lately. Let me figure out things and chapter updates will stabilize. Also thank you for 420 collections!)

King POV

Ham Burger dude really took his time laughing. If you can call that a laugh. I suppose I should remain silent.People got their quirks.

He finally stopped and looked at me.

"Let's go, shall we? I have the best cooks from West Blue working for me."

"Sounds great."

It really does. The food here was overwhelmingly good. Even in the not-so-big taverns. It just needs to be tasty but not to the point of my clothes ripping and me moaning like in Shokugeki no Soma. It would be really, really weird. Nobody wants to see that.

I once again walked through the halls of this castle with some company. The owner of the place even gave me a little tour. He told me, proudly and cheerfully, about the numerous wars Ballywood Kingdom had won.

A Canon that shoots spoons. A battle suit made out of seashells. A painting of a sponge in a pineapple. Some sword named Supreme Ancient Battle God Immortal Sword (very shiny). All the normal things any museum has.

We arrived at a grand dining hall. It looks really medieval. It has a very long table in the middle, with the majority of food sitting on the opposite side. Some servants stood along the walls. The whole room was mostly made out of some dark wood. Two big chandeliers hanging on either side of the table lit up the whole room, along with some thin windows.

You can see a mountain of food from here. Why the hell is that drumstick so big? Who did you hunt for that? A pheonix? Mary, no doubt, would just inhale it, bone included.

"I suggest we not comically sit on the opposite sides of the table." said Burger.

We went over and sat down. He took the main royal seat, and I sat a seat away on his left. Felt like a gaming chair back home.

I had little trouble with choosing what I wanted to eat since there were so many choices to make. A salad would be nice since I'm getting so healthy nowadays.

I almost forgot. I looked at the King Ham Burger, who elegantly ate a tomohawk steak and said:

"Can you please ask people to leave? I want to talk to you about something in private. "

He simply replied: "Of course, you are a dear guest of mine." He snapped his fingers and the servants very promptly left the dining hall.

How do I even ask? I guess I can go for a casual request.

"So. I want to meet Vegapunk as soon as possible. Can you please make that happen?"

He put down his fork and knife and looked at me very seriously. I became serious as well.

"There is two ways this can happen. The first one is through Revolutinaries, which possibly could end with you killing many World Government agents."

He took a pause. I thought about this situation as a whole a little bit. I heard people call him a genius, but I'm not sure if he will agree to help a person just wanting him to do some portal in the first place if I show up unannounced. It's like getting to the major quest NPC at 1st level.

Ham Burger continued:

"The second is far more elaborate.I'm sure you already thought of that much deeper than I could."

No, I did not. Who does he think I am?

"Seeing the understanding in your eyes, King, I know you also thought of tricking the World Government into sending you to Vegapunk themselfes."

"Yep."

I don't even have a clue.

"You already helped my Kingdom so much. I will gladly pull my strings and create an opportunity for agents of CP4 located in my country to make a specific report."

He took a sip of tea and kept talking, on and on....

"....So I heard about King Death Star plans. Vice-Captain Alice from Haltom made quite a report about it. Who else would have thought to hide the plans inside a trash can?"

I'm spacing out. What is life anymore? Is he talking about an apple I tried to draw on a napkin that one time?

"Blue Planet 6th floor has some secrets that you created, right?"

"Who would have known the 7th infinity stone was inside your kidney? Thanos had no chance!"

"I really think stopping space wizards from the darkest side of the Moon was easy for you. You had the experience of fighting magical tapeworms. "

Brain.... not.... workie.... Chew salad....

"So what I'm saying is, leave the rest to me. In a week or two, McRonald will contact you with the address of the place where you will have to make a presentation on anything that you have invented lately. I'll make sure you don't have to share the technology behind your King Clothes or anything of that caliber, so you don't show the world too much of your research. That's sure to make CP4 invite you to work for the World Government. They are an information collection department after all."

"Huh? Yes."

He looked at his wrist watch.

"I have work to do. Once again, thank you very much, King. I'm in your eternal debt."

He stood up and walked out of the dining hall.

The chandelier above my seat creaked and rattled. Some pieces of wood from the celling fell into my plate. What the actual hell.

"Do you have people to fix it or what?"

Right, as I said, Ham Burger just left the hall. I don't want to stay under something that might fall. I got up and wanted to leave. I'm full. Great breakfast.

*BOOM*

WHAT NOW?

*RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE*

If I had not moved, I'd be dead. God dammit!

From the rubble, I saw people standing up and groaning. Are they ninjas? Did they poison my food? I don't know! GOD I HATE IT ALL!

"I told you he sensed us from the beginning."

"Well, now we have no choice."

Why do I make all the wrong decisions in my life?

*RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE*

"H-hey! STOP WITH THAT!"

Are they scared of my heart beating? I have no choice but to bluff. Make the scariest face I can. Just don't throw a ninja star at me.

"This is just me being me."

Stare them in their eyes. I practiced in the mirror!

"Brother, that sound.... I don't feel so good."

One of the three ninjas fell down. Others tried to help him stand back up but one of them just fell face first into the floor. I never thought I'd say this, but HEART PLEASE BEAT STRONGER! THERE IS A THIRD DUDE.

*RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE*

"For the Underworld Government....."

The third guy very loudly bit something in his mouth. I expected an explosion. Like in spy movies. I covered my head with my hands. Please don't be an explosion.

*RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE*

"Did it expire? It still had a week left!"

At that moment, the door opened and people stromed in. YES! It took them too long in their own castle!

Ham Burger came in fuming ang visibly angry. After that, they restricted three ninjas with chains. He asked me:

"King, do you know who they are and why are they here?"

"Ask them."

I calmed down. Ham Burger is a real lifesaver.

Check pants. Dry.

I didn't even get to enjoy my breakfast.