Ultimatum (2)

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Emeravwe sat cross-legged behind the small desk, her knees throbbing, her neck and back aching from the strain of bending over the low writing table. She was in the Maiden’s Compound, seated in the back of a classroom with about twenty other Omote-in-training who could not help but turn on their floor cushions to sneak glances at her. The instructing Aye at the front of the room, who was chalking on the board the ranks of Eunuchs and explaining the difference between those of the Inner and Outer Palace, and those who served in office, caught one of the Omote staring at her and launched the chalk at her head.

The girl cried in surprise and the Aye berated, “Omote Achebe! Face front and mind your lesson, unless you want to end up a useless disgrace, as well!”

The Aye glared at Emeravwe and she lowered her head, concentrating on the books before her. One was the thirty-page volume of the Ministry of Justice’s Book of Maxims, the other an empty book whose pages she was filling with the aphoristic principles.

She had been bearing the scorn of Aye Nwanyinma, the instructing Aye, as well as those of other Maidens in the compound who knew of her misadventures in the Compound of the Royal Secretariat. When she left the Bureau of Court Affairs after meeting the director of the Ministry of Justice, she had met privately with the Rode Aye in their office. Yet, by the following day, the glares of many of the Aye trained on her and the whispers of Agaenaye followed her. She was even humiliated daily by Aye Nwanyinma before her class of Omote-in-training.

Emeravwe felt as though she were back in her days as an Omote, when she had borne the contempt of everyone around her and had wished to hide in the garden in the Eunuchs’ Compound with Aslan. She knew it was harder to keep rumors from spreading among the Maidens than it was to keep the wind from blowing, but she had not foreseen such an immediate outcome.

The punishment the Rode Aye gave her, like Orori Taikiru’s, was extremely lenient considering her crime. She was required to rise before dawn each morning and kneel in the Pavilion of Offerings for six hours without food or water, and in the evenings, she ground ink for use in the offices and classrooms of the compound. In addition to this, during the day, she completed Orori Taikiru’s assignment under the oversight of Aye Nwanyinma, who the Rode Aye ordered to collect three copies of the Ministry of Justice’s Book of Maxims from her each day and deliver to the Bureau of Court Affairs.

Emeravwe did not wonder that Aye Nwanyinma resented her, and other Maidens looked at her with disdain. She was a sudden burden the Aye had likely not accounted for, and she had brought shame upon the Maidens’ Compound. She doubted her treatment would be any different in the Bureau of Court Affairs once she finally returned to work.

It had been nearly a year since her appointment to the Bureau, and she had built a good rapport with her supervisors and coworkers. But how would they view her now? Eunuch Otase certainly would not trust her with any important tasks, and she would probably be relegated to running errands and writing reports.

As if on cue, a sharp pain pierced her hand, the pain like a sobering blow that curbed her worries. She placed her brush down to rub her wrist, sore from the strain of grinding ink and writing.

She had bigger concerns than how she would be treated in the Bureau of Court Affairs. Her meeting with Aslan the previous night, as well as what she discovered in the Royal Secretariat, continually nagged her.

Mudiaga advised her to forget what she had read, but the records indicated she was related to insurgents—that was not something she could put out of mind. Moreover, if what she had read was true, then she was connected to not just one, but two clans of traitors: her guilt was inescapable.

A cloak of despair fell around Emeravwe, fastening tight around her neck to choke her as she stared at the open notes. Her stomach churned with regret. What had she been living for all these years? She thought, It does not matter if you have no background? You can still be better than other Maidens? You can still marry the Orodje? She laughed bitterly within. Your family murdered his father!

For the past decade she had wondered who her family was and had often been in agony over their absence. It turned out they were two of the most prestigious clans in Xxenen history, yet she could neither be happy nor awed. It was abundantly shocking enough that they devised to murder a king and destroyed themselves. What had they hoped to gain? How could it have been worth decimating years of glorious history and ruining their descendant’s life?

Emeravwe grimaced at the irony. The Omote had called her a worthless valued child and it was true. What use was it to be descended from clans of traitors? She would be a dead valued child if anyone ever found out. In her situation, how could she even consider a relationship?

When she had gone to the garden, it was to be comforted by Aslan. She knew she could never reveal what she saw to him, but she had wanted to be held by him and be reassured of her security in his ever-present support. She never expected he would address her as he had. She was stupefied and upset at how coldly he treated her and wept after he had gone, but she realized now that she could not blame him. She always took advantage of him.

He was by her side whenever she needed him and fulfilled nearly everything she required, never asking much in return. The one thing he wanted she refused him, but he remained with her, so she took him for granted. Aslan always gave of himself to her, but she never repaid him. Now, when she was beginning to recognize that she cared for him as much as he did her, she saw that there was nothing to give, and that she should give nothing.

She had feared that if she surrendered to his affections her life would stagnate in the Outer Palace. But if she gave in now, she would end up ruining his life.