I lost track of how much time I spent with the pack. It's not hard to see that they're a family – a dysfunctional family, but a family, nonetheless. It felt nice to be part of, even if it was just mostly observing. I'm not sure how many times I caught myself looking at Stiles. I barely know him, but I can see the possibility there.
I know that I'm not ready to jump into anything, but I also think that people come into our lives for a reason. Even if that didn't apply to everyone, Stiles is different. I can just… feel it.
"I know that look." Lydia mused as we sprawled across her bed, binging on romantic comedies. I shrugged and struggled to keep my face impassive. "Don't deny it. I have eyes and more intelligence than the average dog. You're hot for Stiles." She said, easily. I blushed but didn't acknowledge her. "For what it's worth, I think that you guys could work together. I don't think that either of you is ready for anything other than friendship, yet, but later down the road, I can see it. He's been through so much crap, Bon. Don't break his heart. I'd be forced to kick your ass. He and I may not be the best of friends, but he's always been there for me when I've needed him. He's one of a kind."
"I don't plan on breaking anything. He's lucky to have you, Lyds." I told her. She smiled, it was soft and I could tell that her guard was down. She keeps her brave face on when we're not home, but here, it's like she's free to be herself. I just met her and I can already tell that she's one of the strongest women I've ever met.
"As long as we're on the same page," she told me.
"We are." I promised. "What's the deal with Peter? Should I be worried about him? I mean, I know what you told me and how he was earlier."
"Peter is someone that you should always keep your guard up around. He's manipulative and ingenious. Don't underestimate him. He may be pack, but he never does anything, unless it benefits him. Just… watch your back."
Lydia fell asleep hours ago and I couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned in bed and no avail. I sighed and slipped on my shoes and grabbed my phone. I pulled on a sweater and grabbed my keys, before leaving the house. I just need some air. I feel too constricted in here. I need to feel nature around me.
I don't know how long I walked for. I just knew that I needed to feel the trees around me and the dirt beneath my feet. I was well into the woods, before I came to a stop. I found my way into a clearing with a perfect view of the crescent moon and the stars. I laid down and just looked up at the sky. It's calming – peaceful. It's exactly what I needed.
In times like these, I like to believe that everyone I've lost is looking down on me, the way that I'm looking up at the sky.
I can feel the gentle hum of nature course through my fingertips. When I'm out in the wilderness, I can feel how connected everything is. It's rejuvenating. It feels like I'm getting back to my roots – back to the core of things. It's refreshing – healing. I feel more at ease, already. It's just what I needed.
"You know, you really shouldn't be out here alone. There are more dangerous things than me out in the woods, in the middle of the night." A voice mused from behind me. I jumped and the earth shook. I took a deep breath, trying to get my power under control. When I let go like that, it's always when I'm alone. I'm vulnerable otherwise. I saw Derek walking over to me. I tried to ignore the way that my pulse was working on overdrive and wouldn't slow down.
"I'm a witch. I can take care of myself." I told him. He smirked and settled down beside me. He did it with ease, but he looked stiff, like he wasn't used to being around people.
"I see that." He agreed. I sat up, but kept my fingers threaded through the grass, not wanting to let go of my solace just yet. "Seriously, though, you never know who or what is in the woods here, especially at night." He warned me. I peered over at him.
"I know that I'm not from around here, but I seriously doubt that it's any worse than Mystic Falls. Lydia's clued me in on what you guys have gone through, but trust me. Things in Virginia aren't exactly a walk through the park. You may have werewolves here, but back there they have vampires. We had a handful of werewolves – yeah – but only a few. There were vampire-werewolf hybrids, the Original vampire family, ghosts, doppelgangers, and a whole lot of crazy. I can handle myself." I assured him. The faintest hint of a smile graced his face.
"You know… You remind me of someone, Bonnie." Derek admitted, quietly. My ears perked up a bit.
"Who's that?" I asked him. He looked over at me and seemed to ponder whether or not he should say.
"My older sister, Laura," he finally whispered, after a couple of minutes of silence.
"I didn't know that you had a sister." I told him, quietly. His sharp intake of breath was like a knife cutting through the silence.
"I did. She died." He breathed. I moved my hand on top of his, before I realized what I was doing.
All of a sudden, a rush of memories came flooding through my vision. I saw Derek and his sister, when they were kids. I saw them growing up together. I saw the fire that demolished the Hale's house and heard their screams. I saw Laura dead, in the woods. I felt the agony that Derek felt when he found her. I felt the betrayal that flowed through his entire being, as he realized that it was Peter who killed her and who had used her as a trap to draw him back to Beacon Hills. I saw Derek take his revenge and kill Peter. I also saw Peter come back to life. I saw Derek sacrifice his alpha power to save his younger sister, Cora. I saw bits and pieces of everything, before I found the strength to pull my hand back.
I stared at Derek, dumbfounded. No wonder he's so hesitant around everyone. He's been through so much…
"I am so sorry, Derek." I blurted out. The look that he gave me told me that he knew that I was just apologizing for Laura dying. I knew that he felt what I just saw. He was shaking. He stood up and started to walk away. I scrambled to my feet and pulled on his shirt sleeve to stop him. He whipped around and faced me, obviously deteriorating. "I didn't… It wasn't on purpose… The visions… I can't control them." I apologized. "I'm sorry." I told him. He looked grim, but gave me a curt nod in acknowledgement, anyway.
I took a deep breath and wrapped my arms around him, taking a chance. He stiffened, before relaxing in my grip. At some point, his arms went around me, too, holding me to him.
We stayed that way for hours. My legs locked up and my back ached, but I never complained. I just stood there, holding him, trying to help him hold himself together. Sometimes, it doesn't matter who is there for you. You just need someone. It doesn't take much to fly off the rails and I don't want to the cause for Derek to.
"Bonnie, I'm okay." Derek whispered, his voice hoarse. I nodded and pulled away from him. He looked at me, like he wanted to say more. "Thank you… for that."
"You don't have to thank me. That's what friends or for… Well, pack… And you guys let me in when you barely knew me… And I know what it's like. I didn't mean to trigger anything for you." I apologized, again.
"I don't blame you, for what happened." He told me, softly. I nodded. "I'll… I'll stay out here with you, until you're ready to turn in. You really shouldn't be out here alone. There's something circling Beacon Hills and we haven't been able to tell what it is yet." He offered. I shifted my weight from foot to foot.
"Can we stay out here, a little longer?" I asked him. He nodded. I sat back down and looked up at the sky. It didn't take him long to settle down, next to me. I jumped when I felt his hand on my face.
"You're crying." He explained. My eyebrows rose.
"I didn't realize." I whispered. I mopped off the rest of my face and studied the ground. The emotions that I can still feel radiating off of Derek, in addition to the memories that his have stirred up… I'm a mess. I sniffled and willed myself not to cry.
"It's okay." He promised. I shook my head. I have to get a hold of myself. With everything going on… The last thing I need is my powers to go haywire, because I'm an emotional wreck. The last time that happened… I can't do it again. I'm still trying to get the Expression out of my system. It made everything so much easier… But I don't want to go to the dark-side. Too much shit has happened. "You're beautiful when you cry." Derek admitted. I laughed. I hiccupped and held my stomach, because I was laughing so hard.
"I'm really not."
"I think you are."
"As attractive as you are, you're not my type." I told him, quietly. He looked at me, taken aback. "Some of the things you do… You remind me of someone, too… and it's not something that I'd be able to get passed." I added. He nodded, but he didn't look surprised. Some of his body language screams Damon, but the brooding is definitely more like Stefan. Either way, it's a no go.
"I'm not blind, Bonnie. I don't have to have werewolf senses to see the attraction going on between you and Stiles. Take it as a compliment. It doesn't need to be anything else." He teased, bumping my shoulder with him. I laughed and bumped him back.
"You're not so bad, Derek."
"And you can't blame a guy for trying."
"I have a feeling like we're going to be really good friends," I admitted.
"I do, too."
"And I can see why Stiles calls you Sourwolf," I added. We both got up and started walking. Derek whispered something under his breath, so low, that I barely caught it.
"Fucking teenagers."
A/N: More Bonnie/Stiles interaction next chapter! :) Review?