Chapter 10: Admissions

Oliver pulled the photo from the book. "You knew I was there?" I nodded and he looked up at me. "Leah saw you and snapped the picture, but when I went there and around the city to find you. Well, you where gone. I figured you where there to get me so ran to the orphanage to pack my bag, but then days turned into weeks..." He slid the picture back into the page. "I did come to get you, but I saw you where happy and decided it might be best to leave you there." He turned another page and stopped again.

"One night while you where gone Jacob said something that's really been bothering me." He closed the book and laid it on the nightstand. "He was trying to pack up and drive away. Joe called and I ran to help. I had pulled the keys out of his jeep and tried to pull him from the truck when he said; No man you don't get it if she goes back they'll hurt her again. I brushed it off as drunken madness, but he kept calling for you saying you where going to get caught."

I took a deep breath and took off my sweatshirt. "Usually they are hard to see, but after the day I dove into the cliffs to save you guys my back got bruised. He went in with me as the doctor checked me and asked about them." I took off my shirt and turned for Oliver to see. "They don't hurt anymore." He ran his hand down my back. "What are they from?" I put my shirt back on and faced Oliver.

"From the orphanage. I had tried to run away when I was 14, but got caught. Leo caught me actually, and when he dragged me back he handcuffed me to a pole in the basement. He took off his belt like normal, but this time he didn't stop after the two smacks he normally dealt out. He hit harder and used the buckle side. I guess it caught my skin a few times... When he was done I remember him pulling the cuts apart and telling me how ingrateful I was. That I was just like you. It sounds crazy, but I was so proud in that moment that I stood back up. I received another blow and fell, but it was worth it."

I shrugged and Oliver's eyes filled with tears. "Oh Valor... I am so sorry. I thought he'd leave you alone cause your a girl. He didn't hit any girls when I was there." I nodded and he pulled me in for a hug.

"So Jacob saw?" I nodded in his arms. "I told him not to tell you. I wasn't ready to tell anyone." Oliver let me go and pushed the small hairs out of my face. "And now?" I shrugged and the hairs fell again acting as a curtain. "Now I have forgiven you and I am willing to trust you." He nodded and let out a deep breath.

"Well now that I can't sleep. Want to eat?" Oliver asked as I nodded before heading to the kitchen. "Any more shifty stories?" I laughed and Oliver glared at me. "Well yeah, buy not as bad as that one." Oliver poured us waters and took out the bread. "Did he ever touch you?" I thought back to Leo and his goones. "No not Leo, but one of his guys did once." He dropped the knife. "What did he do?" I drank some water and looked down at the counter. "I've never told anyone before."

Oliver slid into a stool forgetting the bread. "It was right before we left. Leah told me what this man had done to her for years. He came into my room the next night and tried to. Well you know, but I fought back. He pinched my chest and tried to get me to lay back. I grabbed his hoodie and pulled it in front of his face, when I got him bent in half I kicked him and he flew off the bed. I guess the nosie was loud enough to wake Leo. When Leo came in he saw my nightgown ripped and his man on the floor. He dragged him out by his ear. The next morning I dropped a poison in his eggs and watched as he died clawing at his throat." I glanced at Oliver and he looked sick. "But I will say no one ever touched us again like that."

I let him have a moment as I made us turkey sandwiches. "I can not say sorry enough." Oliver said as I slid him a sandwich. "You didn't know Ol." I ate the sandwich before he even touched his. "Have you ever... you know." I chuckled as my brother struggled to say sex. "Yes when I was with Diego. We did it once, but it didn't feel right, so I didn't do it again. I think that's why he cheated." Oliver shook his head. "That's no reason to cheat Val."

"I know Ollie, but it is what it is." He put his sandwich down. "I paid him." My head shot up to see my brother crunched brows as he looked at me. "Paid who?" He took a sip avoiding the question. "Diego." I dropped the cup of water I had in my hand and the glass clattered breaking into pieces.

"On his calls I could tell he was getting to close to you. He was telling me things that where personal to personal. I told him to break it off. He called me back a week later saying he couldn't, that he loved you." I thought back and remembered him trying to start fights and offering me drugs. "I threatened to tell you, and he said he'd handle it. Next thing I knew he called and said it was done."

I slid the glass from the counter into a bag and wiped up the water. "Anything else?" I asked eyeing him. Oliver shook his head. "I felt bad, tried to call him back. But he never answered, and then the guilt made me feel worse that I couldn't write anymore so I showed up to check on you." I nodded and tossed the bag into the trash. "Did you love him?" Oliver asked as he played with the lettuce sticking out of his sandwich. "I did in a way, but I think I would have outgrown him."

I shrugged and sat back in the stool. "So it would be a bad thing if I invited him to visit." I nodded and looked up to see Diego leaning against the wall behing Oliver. My eyes shot to Oliver as he smiled weakly. "Oh hell." I said as Diego rounded the counter and put his hand on my shoulder. "Can we go talk?" I sent dagger eyes at my brother as I turned toward the back-door. "Sure."

I walked outside to see the sun coming up. "Your brother said I could stay in the house for a bit. Is that okay with you?" I shrugged and kicked the sand. "It's Oliver's house." Diego walked around to face me his curly hair falling into his face. "I'm sorry I hurt you the way I did, but I had to. I fell in love and I was lying to you. You kept fighting for me even though I did all those horrible things, and it made me love you more." I took a deep breath and needed a second to catch up.

"Did you love me?" He asked as his blue eyes met mine. "Yeah I did." He had changed too since the last time I saw him. He was older and stubble covered his face, where he once was clean shaven. His hair although still long was shorter then it was when we where together. "Do you think you could love me again?" He asked as I looked down to the beach. Zane walked to the house next door with papers in his hand.

I turned back to face Diego head on. "Maybe, but it's more complicated now." He nodded and pulled his hair back away from his face. "Is it that guy Jacob?" I nodded still knowing there where feelings there. "Maybe I'm not really sure how to feel about any of this. I mean I just found out you cheating wasn't really cheating. That he has been calling my name in a stupor since I left, and he cheated on me with Leah who is on her way back with a baby." I let out a breath as he smiled and let out a laugh. I found myself smiling at the familiarity of it. "Still rant when you're overwhelmed." My smile wavered. "Yeah." I said as he nodded.

"Well I got a job with the nut down the road." My face lit up again. "Paco's surf shop?" He nodded "That's the place, and I have to head there in a few." I found myself opening the gate. "I'll walk you. I owe Paco a visit anyway." He nodded and closed the gate behind him as we walked down the sand. "You are way prettier then I remember." Diego said as we walked. "Still a sweet talker like I remember." He laughed again and bumped my shoulder.

"I'm gonna win you back Valor." Diego said as he opened the surfshop door for me. I froze looking at him, and I knew that look he was giving me. It was full of determination. "How about we just be friends. Know I forgive you and move foward." He nodded as I walked in. "That's good enough, for now." He squeezed my shoulder and Paco flew out of the back door.

"Work time lover boy!" He sang as he shook off a kimono robe. Inlet out a laugh ad he rounded the corner cresting space between us. "Valor dear why don't you go up and start the teapot." I smiled, grabbed Pacos shoulder, and kissed his cheek before heading up to his apartment. "Lovely girl." Paco praised as I shut the door. I started the teapot and found a whole cabinet of teas. I choose a jasmine green tea and found the mugs. I found beautiful colored cups and relixlzed inhad never looked in his cabinets. I picked a yellow one with clouds and a white one with a moon on it and  placed the tea bags into the cups. As it whistled the door opened and Paco came in.

"So who you going to choose?" I glanced up before pouring the water. "I picked the jasmine green tea. Isn't that enough decisions today?" I slid him the yellow cup as he muttered. "Interesting." Paco nodded and sipped the tea. I held the cup with two hands. "What's interesting?" I asked as I felt my hands warming up. "No one ever picks this cup. The yellow and the storm picture depicts an imbalance. Where as you're cup is of the moon. In astrology it's what your heart wants."

I shook my head. "Paco I don't know how you do it, but you are utterly amazing." He smiled and fixed his mustache. "I honestly am torn. I loved Diego a long time ago... I see him now different, but the same. Which makes those old feelings rise. But then there's Jacob. Not the Jacob who plays with peoples emotions, my emotions. The Jacob who protected me from the wave. The one who kisses me deeply and full of passion when we are alone, or after walking me home. The one who kept my secret even after hurting me."