Chapter 5: Talking

I must have fallen asleep and when I glanced at the clock it read six. I slipped out of Oliver's arms and snuck down stairs slowly moving the keys from the bowel and walking to my car. I started it up and felt guilty for not leaving a note. I was going to be late so I drove back to the fire house and ran inside to change and get to work.

I sat in my office until three and finished up the paper work. A knock sounded on my door. "Come in." I said as I looked over the signatures. I looked up to see Valor carrying a brown paper bag. "So how was your morning she said as she dropped the bag on my desk. I shrugged and she nodded pulling out two burgers and fries from Joe's. "Thanks." I said as I took a bite. "What did Oliver say?" She shook her head. "He hasn't been around since the movie. The twins said he didn't look like he slept well.

I nodded and suddenly wasn't hungry. I wrote a note. "Give him this tell him you found it on his door." She took the note and slid it in her pocket. "Okay, will you be at the bonfire tonight?" Ahe asked and I nodded. Valor smiled and left me to my half eaten burger and full fry cup. I picked at it and ultimately tossed it. At seven I checked in with the Chief and he told me to only work days because he was running out of things to  give me.

I laughed and headed up to change. I grabbed jeans and a tank top, I brought a sweater and Oliver's flannel that I had reluctantly cleaned. I needed to return it. I walked till I saw a fire. Zane sat playing a guitar, the twins sang and Valor danced around with Oliver chasing her. Jacob sat and watched them as he tickled her. I walked closer and when he eyed me I thought maybe it was a bad idea to stay.

"Hey I just wanted to return your flannel." Oliver looked at me and then at the green flannel. "Keep it." He said as he pulled a note from his bkue and gray flannel pocket. "Valor said she found this on the door, but I don't have paper from the firehouse and I checked the door this morning." He handed it to me and went to walk away. "Okay I'm sorry, I was running late and I didn't want to get fired. And I really like you." He turned and glared at me. "You really like me? Enough to run away everytime I relax and ask my sister to lie. Which by the way she sucks at."

I held his flannel to my chest wishing I hadn't washed it so it would still smell like him. "I get that you're mad, but I want to get to know you." He shook his head and crinkled his brows. "I don't believe you." Tears ran down my face and I wiped them quickly before nodding and walking back into the shadows. I watched him walk stiffly walk back to the fire and take a seat by Jacob. Valor still dancing near by. He turned towars me and I stepped back and walked further in the dark between his house and the next.

"Gemma?" Paco called from his stair well. "Hey Paco." I called trying not to sound lost. "Oh love not all is lost. Do not cry he still loves you." I started to cry again as he rushed down the stairs. He held me as I cried into his chest. When I calmed down I pulled away and saw I had stained his scarf with my tears. "Oh Paco I ruined your scarf." He shrugged and used it to wipe my face. "You're more important then a scarf." He said as he helped me up. "Come with Paco." We walked up the walk way and into his apartment.

"That mean wolf hurt you?" I shook my head. "No I hurt him and now he doesn't want anything to do with me. Not that I blame him." I played with the flannel in my lap and ran my hands around the collar. "Go to the beach and sit. He will come, or stay here with Paco and try again tomorrow." He said as he rubbed my back. "Okay I'll go." He smiled and played with his mustache. "Don't shield your emotions let them run like the rain, he will see his ways." I nodded and thanked him before heading to the beach. I sat with my toes in the wet sand and his flannel in my lap.

Thinking about it made me cry harder. The tears silently slid down my face. "Gemma?" His voice caught off guard and I glanced up to see him standing there in basketball shorts and no shirt on. I turned back to the water as my tears fell on the shirt. "I'm sorry I snapped at you earlier. I was just mad, frustrated." I nodded and Oliver sat next to me. "Are you not going to talk to me." I shrugged and turned to him. "I don't really have much to say other then I'm sorry again." I whispered and I wiped my face with the sleeve of my sweater.

"How long have you been out here?" He asked and I shrugged. "I don't know how long." He moved to behind me and pulled me back to lean against him. "Oliver what do you want, because I'm not so sure we are going to work. I mean you're perfect, and I'm a fuck up."  He pulled me closer and ran his hand through my curly hair. "I am not perfect Gemma. I just yelled at the girl I think I'm falling in love with because she keeps dissappearing from my bed." I turned to see him looking at me with concern. "You didn't really yell, you just sent me away."

A bubble of laughter came out of me as I started to cry once again. He wiped them, but they kept coming. "Why are you crying now Gem?" I shook my head and he kissed my cheek. "Just thinking that's my curse." His eyebrows crunched together again and I realized he did that when he had bad news or worried.

"I was sent away by my parents for not conforming to their standards of perfection. Straightened hair, makeup, dresses and heels. I was never meant to be that, and so I rebelled. I was sent away by old Chief, because I worked to hard I outshined her. My new chief gives me nights off for being to on top of things, and now you do because I cant get my head on straight and I panick." I shrugged and tears leaked from my eyes. "I didn't shun you Gemma, I was just mad. I feel like everytime we get close you run away."

Oliver moved my hair away from my face and kissed my wet cheek. "You just need to tell me when these thoughts of feelings rise, so I can be there for you. Stop running from me. That kills me." I nodded and hugged his flannel to my chest as he hugged me.