Chapter 52

When Eli's mother heard a soft knock on the door, she opened it expecting the visitor. With a smile on her face, she let him in and couldn't help but gasp in recognition. She knew it was Ari – who was recently revealed to be an omega – but she thought she never met him before.

She didn't expect to see the mated beta who helped Eli with his first heat. Somehow it made sense.

"Eli's room is upstairs." She guided him despite knowing that he already knew where Eli's room was. When she opened the door, there was nobody inside. "He'll be here soon."

Ari smiled at her with a nod of his head. "Thank you."

True to her words, Eli didn't take long.

Eli could barely breathe as he looked at the boy in his room.

In more ways than one, Ari was beautiful, and it made his heartbeat quicken at the sight of him. Admiring him, Eli couldn't help but do so as he took in the sight before him.

The moment Eli entered his room and closed the door, Ari turned around from where he was sitting on Eli's bed and smiled at him. That only made Eli press himself more to the door, too nervous to approach him even though he knew he shouldn't be.

They were friends. These stupid feelings will pass. He already decided that Alec was the one for him, and always will be. There was no point in thinking of Ari on his bed. It meant nothing.

But it wasn't easy when he could see Ari shrugging off his winter clothes, sitting there with nothing but a black turtleneck that made him swallow at the sight. He was blissfully unaware of all the pain and bruises Ari was hiding, and he didn't know it was all because of him as he looked down timidly at his feet wondering what's next.

"Do you plan to stand there all day?"

When Eli looked at Ari, he was met with a raised eyebrow and a teasing smile. It snapped Eli from his reverie as he shook his head with colored cheeks.

"Sorry, I just can't believe this." He told him as he took a few nervous steps towards his bed so he could take a spot across from Ari. "We're alone. No Rowan this time."

Ari's smile waned a bit before he nodded his head. "Don't think there's a need for that anymore."

"Yeah, but you..." Eli shifted in his place not knowing how to ask his question, but his curiosity was getting the better of him. "Why did you hide it? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I had my own reasons – not that they matter anymore." Ari told him trying not to twitch in annoyance at that. Even if it was a secret he was forced to keep, it was better for it to remain one. It should have been obvious to Eli who should have kept his mouth shut the moment he realized what he was seeing.

Not even Alec had suspected, he didn't even react to it.

Ari could have just gone home with his secret intact.

"At least now we can be alone like this." Eli told him seeming happy about that, and the way he looked down smiling softly made Ari reach out to him with his hand before he caught himself and retracted it. This, however, didn't escape Eli's notice as he looked at him quizzically. "What? What is it?"

"I was just..." Ari looked away thinking of anything to say wondering where this hateful violent urge came from. Maybe it had to do with Eli's excitement and joy at the revelation of Ari's secret. All he cared about was how he got another omega friend in Ari, a friend he can be alone with like this. It didn't matter much to him what Ari was dealing with because of something he thoughtlessly revealed. Not even an apology.

All what mattered was Eli and his happiness.

"Just what?" Eli urged leaning closer and Ari looked at him in a moment of contemplation.

"I was just thinking about what I really want." Ari told him considering something for a moment before a small smile appeared on his face. A smile that made Eli smile back. "Alpha Hawthorne came to my house yesterday, told me and my mother that there are alphas interested in me."

Interestingly, Eli's smile disappeared. "Oh."

"I am supposed to meet one of them soon."

"But wait," Eli furrowed his eyebrows clearly not liking any of this, but he had no right to like or dislike it. This never concerned him. He still didn't want it to happen. "Aren't you already seeing someone?"

"I am." Ari confirmed, momentarily surprised that Eli actually remembered, but then he caught himself and continued. "I just thought I could do better. See the options I have."

That was probably the biggest lie he had ever uttered, and he didn't know how he managed to be convincing as he said it because Eli seemed like he was buying it. It actually hurt to say it, not when he knew for sure that no matter who he meets, he'll never do better than what he already has. There was nobody else one his mind.

"Are you not happy with them?"

For some reason, Eli sounded hopeful. As if this was exactly what he wanted to hear, but mixed with that hopefulness was a hint of hopelessness. Although he seemed happy, Eli was defeated.

Too bad for him, Ari sniffed this immediately.

And Ari remembered all the 'silly thoughts' Eli had shared when they sat in the park. Thoughts that friends don't have about other friends.

The dull ache of his bruises made him spiteful.

"He does make me happy." That was the complete and honest truth. The sincerity of his words was evident in his voice, and yet his hand still found itself sneaking towards Eli's, almost touching it. "But I don't think an alpha is what I want sometimes."

Eli gulped. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that sometimes I find myself craving something else." He sighed wistfully looking ahead at nothing in particular while Eli watched him with a conflicted expression at his vague words. "It makes you wonder sometimes, if we weren't tied by mates or our biology, would things be different?"

"Sometimes I find myself wondering the same things, too." Eli admitted, and it was enough for Ari to place his hand on top of his making Eli's breath stutter.

"Do we have to be with alphas, Eli?"

He watched as Eli sat up straighter leaning further away, but he was careful to not break their contact when he did so. All this time he was silently staring at Ari's hand on top of his, and all he could feel was his palms shaking at the touch.

His heart was beating faster, and Ari could feel it.

He knew what he was doing.

"I don't know." Eli said thinking of Alec but not moving his hand away. His hands became fists that closed on his sheets, and his cheeks were getting warmer as he obliviously let his feelings be toyed with. "Do we have another choice?"

"If we had, what would you choose?"

Licking his dry lips, Eli sat in a moment of contemplation. A moment where he thought about everything carefully. He was torn between two impossible choices.

A mate who was his, decided by fate, and a love he knew he couldn't have but greedily desired. Ari's golden gaze was warmer than Alec's blue, and his lips looked softer, pinker. Everything about him was impossibly beautiful and gentle, and Eli thought it was unfair that he was being asked that like this when everything about Ari was so inviting.

When Ari was so close within his reach.

Suddenly, it was hard to remember why this was difficult as two soft hands cupped his face, and a warm forehead touched his. Eli felt their noses brush, and Ari moved away a strand of red hair from Eli's face with a soft giggle. Any thoughts of Alec scattered away so quickly it was only Ari now.

It made Eli wonder if mates were a real thing despite him having one of his own. People would always say that those who found their mates were lucky, but Eli felt like he was the unluckiest person alive right now.

"It's ok." Ari told him as he felt the faintest ghost of a touch on his lip, but it was only Ari's breath and nothing more. "You don't have to choose."

"I don't know why, I really don't." Eli's voice broke sounding as if he was about to cry, and that heartbreaking sound made Ari ecstatic. "But I would choose you."

The words hung in the air, and Eli wanted nothing more than to close the distance despite it not feeling like anything he had with Alec. No sparks flew, no pull urged him to do so, there was nothing but his feelings guiding him towards Ari. Just his feelings and nothing more, and yet those feelings dwarfed everything the mate bond added to his relationship with Alec.

He was trying to make it work with Alec, he really was, but Ari made everything collapse so easily. Wrecking all the progress Eli made in just a few moments.

But the kiss he expected, wanted, didn't come. It was never coming.

Instead, all that came were lies he couldn't see through and the cold harsh reality that followed as Ari pulled away from him.

"I would have chosen you, too."

Came the lie.

"Too bad we don't have another choice. We're omegas after all. We can't be together like this."

Followed the reality.

"You're right." Eli swallowed not wanting to lose this closeness he had with Ari, but he couldn't do anything when the other moved away. As he felt his heart tearing apart, he added weakly. "I can't do that to Alec."

And Ari watched him fall and crumble.

Maybe it'll be a lesson for him to not say whatever's on his mind before thinking. It could hurt others, and it could hurt him.

And it did.