Chapter 14
I change back into my normal clothes. Sylvia is in the kitchen figuring out dinner. I decide to go see what C is up to. I enter her room, set my things down, and notice that C is curled up on her bed. I hope she isn't sick. What a way to ruin such a great day. I hope she's alright. I sit on the bed next to her. I place my hand against her forehead. Damn, she is burning up. After a while of pleading with her to let me know what's going on, eventually, she relaxes her body and I can see tears. Without thinking, I scoop her up and hold her against me. I just want them to stop. I want her to be okay. I don't want to see her in so much pain.
"Foster, I like you. Like, more than like you." Before I have time to digest what was just thrown at me, she hides again. This time, instead of curling up into a ball, she stays with me. Her tiny hands clutch my shirt. This beautiful person was in so much pain, because of me? I feel her trembling. My heart aches. I pull her face away from my chest, tilting her head up so that our eyes meet. Her tears are gone, but she still looks so afraid. I inch my face closer to hers. She doesn't move away. She stays frozen, like how she was when she stood in front of the class that first day.
"Is it okay if I kiss you?" I want her to want this too. I don't want her to be scared. I don't want her to cry or hurt. I want to hold her and kiss her. I want to spend so much more time together, finding ways to make this plain old city interesting. I want to keep holding hands and watching movies together. I like how we tease each other. Everything feels okay when I am with her.
"I think I would like that." As soon as she finishes that last word, I close the gap between us. Our lips moving together, it just feels right. I feel her trembling again and try to pull away, but she clutches me even tighter. Her lips are soft, and warm, and sweet. Sweeter than anything I've ever tasted before. I can't get enough of this. I nibble on her lower lip. This time when she trembles, I decide to deepen the kiss. My tongue pushes past the luscious sugary border that blocks me from exploring her further. She loosens her grip on my shirt and positions her hands at the base of my neck, resting her arms on my shoulders. My hands find their way to her waist. They venture a bit further down, to the hem of her shirt.
Before I go any further, I decide to take a step back. We break, breathing heavily, foreheads touching, her eyes searching for answers.
"Why did you stop?" She almost whines. It sounds heavenly. I rub her hips with my hands, trying to help her understand. I can't keep up with her. If we keep doing this, I will want more. I don't know if either of us is ready for that.
"I don't know if I can keep myself under control," I place my hands on the bed behind me and lean back a bit, increasing the space between myself and the gorgeous creature on top of me. She lays against my chest, drawing shapes with her index finger. It feels nice. I don't want to lose this feeling.
"It's okay," she continues tracing shapes.
"What do you mean?" I sit back up again, this time I take her off of my lap and set her down beside me. "What's okay?"
"It's okay if we stop, but it's also okay if you want to continue." I sense the hunger in her eyes. Every part of my being wants more of this, more of her. My pulse quickens and this time, I'm the one hiding my face. I don't know what the right answer is. I don't know what she wants or what I want. I mean, I want more of her, but I don't know if it's too soon. This is nothing like how it's been in the past with all those other girls. That was just emotionless sex. No talking, no getting to know each other, nothing personal, no feeling anything other than impulse and pleasure. This is new and scary and seems so fragile that if I breathe too hard it will shatter. It's terrifying.
"I want more, but I don't know how much more I can handle," I mumble quietly.
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I bite my lower lip and scooch a bit closer to him. This time, I take the lead. I place his hands on my hips. His arms tense up as I do this. I put my hands where they were previously, except this time I play with the hair at the base of his neck. I twirl his soft almost-curls around my finger and inch my face a bit closer. His eyes are on mine, searching for something. He seems so unsure of himself. Instead of continuing, I place my forehead on his shoulder. His hands rub up and down my sides. He kisses my ear and then rests his head against mine.
"I like you a lot too Claudia." It sounds so nice coming from his lips. As soon as I look up at him, I hear the handle of my bedroom door jiggle. I immediately swing my leg around, so that I am no longer on his lap and stand up. I pretend to be searching for a book to read. I glance at Foster, he reaches for the remote on my nightstand and switches on the TV.
"Dinner is ready you guys!" My mom bursts through the door.
"What's for dinner mom?" I turn around, now facing the door with my arms crossed over my chest.
"Well we had fake Italian last time. I was thinking we could try something different. I made stir fry!" Foster stands up and we follow her into the dining room. My mom takes a seat on one side of the table, Foster and I sit across from her. We pass around the food while my mom dives back into her earlier discussion regarding her experiences with high school dances. A sigh of relief passes my lips. I hate to keep things from my mom, but I don't know if she would keep letting Foster in my room if she knew what happened.
Foster reaches for my hand. I lace my fingers in-between his. We let our hands dangle between us, our other hands occupied with eating utensils. For some reason, I feel a lot stronger now. I feel like I can take on the world. As long as Foster is backing me up, I think I will manage just fine.
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After dinner, Foster and Claudia do the dishes together. Sylvia left them alone after dinner, saying something about being exhausted from all the excitement of the day. Once the dishes are clean, Foster and C head back to her room.
They sit next to each other on the bed. C grabs the remote and scrolls through some films to find anything that looks interesting. Foster holds her hand, inspecting it. He turns her hand over, exploring every unique crease and freckle. She giggles and he decides to just hold her hand. He whips out his phone and decides to shoot a text to his mom, just letting her know what happened today. Within a few minutes, his phone screen lights up. It's a call.
"Hey mom, is everything alright?"
"Yeah hun. Do you think you could put Sylvia on the line? I don't have her number and I wanted to discuss something with her."
"Okay, just give me a minute." Foster mutes himself and turns to C. "Do you think your mom is still awake? My mom wants to talk to her." Foster hands the phone to C and she brings it to her mom. A short while later C returns with the phone and gives it back to Foster.
"Hey mom, it's me again."
"Hey, I talked with Sylvia. You are going to be staying with them for a while. Your aunt gave me a call. It turns out that she checked herself into a psychiatric hospital. I am packing now to leave to go help take care of her. I'm sorry about how sudden this is. Do you think you will be okay with them? I wasn't sure who else to call. I know you have other friends, but I don't think you've ever been over to their houses and I just wanted you to have somewhere to stay where you would be comfortable," Foster cuts her off before she can finish.
"Mom. Mom don't worry about me. Go help your sister. I will be fine. If I need anything, you are a phone call away. Are you taking Cocoa with you or should I rush home to get her so she isn't by herself?"
"Once I have all my stuff packed, I am going to drive over with Cocoa. I will also leave the key so that you and the Jones gals can gather some of your stuff. Thanks for being so awesome kiddo."
"Anything for you Mom. I love you."
"I love you too. I will see you in a bit." With that, the phone call ends. C gives Foster's hand an encouraging squeeze and he rests his head on top of hers. It is going to be a long night.