Chapter 8

Serenity's POV

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Dagger pulled out the chair, sitting down beside me. I couldn't help but stare at him as he did. Well, ogle was probably a more apt description, considering my teeth were seconds from biting through my lower lip. But could I really be blamed? The man was a walking sex idol. Even if he was fully dressed.

It didn't help that I had heard something eerily similar to a groan while he showered. Of course, I wasn't just going to come out and ask if he'd been masturbating...that was his business, not mine! And if I did ask, it probably would've turned out that old pipes were whining or something like that.

But the mere idea that he'd been in the shower—touching himself because of something I did—made my stomach erupt into butterflies. This effect I apparently had on him was intoxicating. Not to mention, with my imagination running wild, I was a lot more observant of him now.

Like the fact that he smelled good. This fresh, masculine scent of woodsmoke, lemons and mint surrounded him. Just like the shirt he'd given me last night. I'd have been the biggest liar if I said I wasn't tempted to steal the one he had on right now for his scent alone.

As I tried to think of how to start our conversation, Dagger's hand rand through his tousled mess of hair even though it was fairly short. Damp from his shower, it shimmered a little. When he scratched his jaw, I took in the dark stubble that covered his chiseled jaw. And his eyes...oh my god. At first glance, I'd thought they were just gray.

The more I looked, however, the more I realized they were a sort of fire and ice combination. A small, inner ring of reddish color surrounded his pupil like it had just frozen in gray. However, it was a detail so easy to miss. Unless you had a staring problem...like me.

Shifting in my seat, I tried to pry my eyes away from his piercing gaze. Especially since we had to talk. But when my gaze fell to my lap, where my fingers picked at each other, I realized I still didn't even know where to start. Not that his proximity was of any help to my focus. Why did I suggest sitting next to me?

In high school, I'd never been the kind of girl to drool over boys. Macie was. But not me because I knew nothing was ever going to happen with any of them. They never asked me on dates or talked to me, outside of asking for homework answers. Did I have crushes? Absolutely, but they were the sort of crushes that nothing would come of. Unless it was a romantic comedy or a teenage romance novel.

But it wasn't. It was high school. Real high school. I was the nerdy, band kid who played tuba. Which was comical enough, given the instrument was almost as big as I was. My band teacher had said that I was "sturdy" enough to carry it, so that's why I picked it up.

And sure, it would've been a cute storyline if someone had found playing tuba to be a fun little quirk, but again, it was high school. The only reason I was just teased rather than relentlessly bullied was that Macie was the head cheerleader. The boys chased after her and I was just the best friend.

The best friend who wasn't pretty enough for a second thought, and who probably liked sweets a little more than she should've. At least I was realistic about it all. So that's why I never drooled over boys. Not even after high school really. Not even with my ex.

But now? With Dagger? Oh boy. Maybe it was just the aftermath of the bonding ceremony. Maybe there was some kind of aphrodisiac on those ribbons. Whatever it was, I seconds—no...nanoseconds—from jumping into his lap and having him take me to his bed.

"You have questions?" Dagger's voice tore me from my thoughts.

"Huh?" My head whipped up, a blushing creeping onto my cheeks. God, I hated that I did that.

"Questions..." Dagger tilted his head to the side, smiling a little. "I'm guessing that's why you want to talk, right?"

"Oh! Yeah, questions. Duh." I pushed my hair back from my face and nodded. However, I could not get a coherent thought to form. Not when he was looking at me. Not when I was just imagining all the things he could do to me.

"Fire away, then." Dagger leaned back in the chair, crossing his arms. There was an authority about him. If he hadn't held my hair back while I threw up last night from my panic attacks, I would've probably stayed far—very far—away from him. He just seemed like the sort of guy you did not piss off.

"Um...these?" I pointed to the marks on my hand. "How do I explain these?"

"Say it's a tattoo."

"And when it just...poofs after two months?" This must've struck a nerve because Dagger's eyes narrowed at me, his body going rigid. Quickly I backtracked, "I'm not saying that's what'll happen. I'm just saying it's a possibility. A big possibility when I don't know anything about it."

"Say it's a temporary tattoo, then."

"Alright..." Apparently, that was as good as that line of questioning was going to get me, so I just decided to move on.

"The black wolf...that was you?" I was pretty confident I already knew his answer, but I needed his verbal confirmation. Because at least then I'd know that all those other people at the gathering last night were...whatever he was as well.

"Yes."

"So that makes you like were...wolf?"

A deep, throaty laugh left Dagger as he nodded. His smile was panty-melting, and he sent it directly my way. "Yeah, like a werewolf."

"Why? How?" I looked at the table, trying to stay focused. "Like, how does that even work?"

"The same way you were born human, I guess. Parents were...werewolves—" The way he said the word was unnatural like he wouldn't have used it if I hadn't, "—so their kids turned out the same."

"But like...isn't it physically impossible?" Peeking up at him, I twisted my fingers in my lap.

"A bumblebee isn't supposed to physically be able to fly," Dagger challenged. He was still leaning back, his arms crossed over his chest.

"A bumblebee doesn't turn into a wasp."

"Touché."

"That's it? You don't have a better answer?" I frowned, a little mad that our conversation seemed to be going nowhere.

"To be honest, no. I don't. It's just one of those things that just...is. I have no idea how or why we came to be. All I know is that it's a bloodline thing, not a curse, like you humans seem to think." Dagger shrugged a little.

"You say it like it's a bad thing...that I'm human."

Flinching at my words, Dagger leaned forward and rested his arms on the table. "Well, it's not exactly advantageous for me. At one point, sure, it was beneficial for a wolf to take a human mate."

"But not now?"

"Not really, no."

"So then you're unhappy with me being your...mate?"

"Also no." One corner of his mouth upturned, like he was fighting back a smile. His eyes cut through mine. "I find you to be fascinating."

"That makes two of us..." Picking at my thumbnail, I tried to think of my next question. Or at least, organize all of my questions so they were logically ordered.

"May I ask you something, Serenity?" Dagger asked, my name rolling off his tongue like a prayer. Or maybe he'd said my name completely normal, and I was imagining it being anything more than that.

"Oh! Of course." I met his eyes again, squirming beneath the heat of them.

"Are you unhappy with me being your mate?"

"I don't think I can answer that..." When he frowned, I blushed again and quickly added, "I just don't know what a mate is or what their function is exactly. Like for real wolves—" Dagger snorted at this, "—the mates have babies, protect each other, but are really only together for procreation reasons. But for werewolves...what would the purpose be?"

"Same thing, I guess." He scratched his jaw again for a moment. Then he shrugged like he didn't have anything else to say.

"So I'm just supposed to be this...baby-making machine for you?" I gaped at him, completely in disbelief.

"It's more than that. First of all, it's not for me. I would never make you go through with anything you didn't want. Sex, pregnancy...it's your choice. Second, we're chosen for each other because we can bring out the best in each other. Obviously, we can also bring out the worst in each other. It's why the Moon Goddess gives us life in pairs.

"We were not just chosen for each other, but we were made for each other. This means we should be compatible in all ways. Mentally, emotionally... physically." Dagger's eyes darkened, raking over me as he finished what he was saying. Oh, he was totally masturbating in the shower.

Pushing the intrusive thought away, I focused on one thing that stood out from what he said.

"You said we should be. Does that mean we might not be?" I frowned, a crease forming between my brows.

"Well...nothing is perfect. That's why fated mate bonds can be rejected. Sometimes...the Moon Goddess puts too much of a challenge in front of us. My aunt rejected her fated mate because she wasn't attracted to him." Running a hand through his hair, Dagger shrugged a bit. "But in theory, we are exactly what the other needs."

Chewing on my lower lip, I tried to process what he was saying. If—if—this was real and true, then it would've explained why I felt more comfortable with him around while we were in the forest. Why I knew he'd defend us if anything happened...but what exactly did he need from me? Dagger didn't seem like the type to need anyone.

Definitely not a short, slightly chubby, human girl with the naivety of a fawn. And what had he said about his aunt? That she rejected her fated mate just because she wasn't attracted to him? And I definitely wasn't the type of girl Dagger had occupying his bed before. I'd seen all of those girls during the ceremony last night, and not one of them was above a size two.

Awe biscuits...I drew blood.

Dabbing at my lip with my finger, I pulled it away to see blood from where my teeth had broken skin. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Dagger lean toward me. He pinched my chin between his thumb and forefinger, turning my face toward him. Concern was etched into his face.

"Don't. Whatever you're thinking, stop." His thumb swept across my lower lip, his eyes burning with intensity. "I'm not sure what is going on in your head—believe me, I'd love to—but whatever it is, stop. If it's what I said about rejection based on lack of attraction, trust me when I say that is not an issue here."

"And if it's about not knowing what I can give you?" I studied him through my lashes, lowering my gaze to his lips. I could just lean in, and give in to this feeling in my stomach. Would he want me to?

"Then we figure that out." Maybe it was my imagination, but I could've sworn Dagger leaned in a fraction of a centimeter closer. Shoot, maybe I was the one who leaned in because he pulled away, retreating back to his arms crossed and slouched position in his chair.

"Any more questions?" he asked.

"So many..." I blinked, once again trying to wade through the mental fog that was Dagger-induced.

"I'm all ears."

"Marking. What is it?"

"Unprotected sex and a hickey," Dagger smirked at me, shifting in his seat a bit. The way his answer excited me was completely wrong. We'll just blame the mate bond for that.

"Oh...that seems very...tame." To be honest, I'd expected nothing short of a physical brand to take place.

"Well, it's more emotional than that—from what I'm told—but those are the basic conditions for it to take," Dagger replied. "So no birth control, no condoms, and a visible 'hickey' has to be left behind."

"And I'm just supposed to trust that you're STD-free?" Crossing my legs, I narrowed my eyes at him.

"Well, considering I've used condoms with every girl I've been with—human or wolf—and I get tested every year..." His voice trailed off, a hint of amusement in his eyes. Then he shrugged, "But if you want proof, I'll get it for you."

Okay, so he isn't afraid to talk about his sex life. Or afraid to use condoms. Points for that...I guess?

"If I go through with marking or whatever it is, then yeah. I'll need proof," I huffed. Did I think he was lying? No. But also, did I know that he wasn't lying? Also no. Guys were shady. I'd learned that with my ex, and I wasn't about to repeat that mistake.

"Fair enough," Dagger shrugged again. "Anything else?"

"What am I supposed to call you? You know, for my human friends who live human lives. I can't just say, 'Oh, this is Dagger and we're mates!"

"I feel like if I tell you that where we are now is the equivalent to being engaged, you'll flip out. So, I guess, you'd just say I'm your boyfriend."

"And we're exclusive?"

"For me, yes. For you, it's your choice, but..." Dagger leaned in toward me again. The smell of woodsmoke and mint overwhelmed me. As if nothing was amiss, though, Dagger continued, "If you were a wolf, this wouldn't be a conversation. We would've marked each other last night when I brought you home."

The way he said it with such surety sent a shiver down my spine, igniting a fire in my belly that I wasn't sure could put out easily. Shifting in my seat, I looked away from him. Because lord only knew the way his eyes undressed me was not helping my dilemma. Suddenly, a new, less hot and heavy question came to mind.

"What about my dad?" I blurted out, turning back to Dagger.

"Your dad?" Dagger cocked an eyebrow.

"Yeah! He's old-fashioned..." When Dagger didn't look like he registered what I said, I frowned. "You know...asking for permission and all that? 'Have her home by eleven, Junior.' That sort of thing."

"Your ex didn't do that..." Dagger's words made my blood run cold.

Of course, he saw that, Serenity. Stupid, stupid, stupid. It wasn't that I was mad Dagger had lived through my ex via our bonding ceremony, it was more of the fact that I was embarrassed.

All my life I'd pictured my perfect boyfriend, and my ex—Evan—had checked every box. In the beginning. He was sweet, funny, and handsome in that Prince Charming sort of way. He'd swept me off my feet during orientation at college. He'd been one of the leaders of the Orientation Welcoming Committee, and one of the first friends I thought I'd made.

However, after we started dating, it wasn't long before he was isolating me from everyone I knew. My phone was never private but his was always locked. After I moved in with him, it only got worse. Name-calling, jabs about my appearance, and sometimes—don't go there, Serenity. But by that point, I had no way out. Or so I thought.

It took months of building up the courage to move out after I'd caught him in our bed with another girl. But I did it, moving back into the dorms during the spring semester of my sophomore year. Evan blew up my phone with texts and calls, but Harvard was a big campus, so I didn't see him much, and I made sure never to be alone. And I went home that summer, which seemed to end his obsession with me.

But the scars still remained and having Dagger throw it in my face that my ex hadn't buddied up to my dad just reopened all of those wounds I still carried.

"I'm sorry. That was out of line." Dagger said, pulling me from the dark thoughts that threatened to overtake my mind. When I simply looked at him, Dagger brushed a strand of hair behind my ear. "If you want me to meet your dad, ask him permission to take you out on a date, then I will. Whatever you want, I'll do it."

A sigh of relief left me. "Thank you...but can you just...tone down the big, scary thing?"

Another guttural laugh escaped Dagger, but I was dead serious. I didn't want my dad having a heart attack, and Dagger didn't look very approachable—be it in wolf form or this form. Kind of like an ex-con. But I guess, as far as the wolves went, he kind of was.

"I'm not joking, Dagger. He's all I've got, and I'm all he's got. If you show up looking like...like...this—" I gestured to all of him, "—he's going to stroke out!"

Glancing at himself, Dagger raised an eyebrow. Obviously, he didn't see an issue with himself. So he frowned and tilted his head at me, tugging at his t-shirt. "Like this?"

"It's not your clothes. It's your whole...aura. Dark, broody...and this!" I gently touched the small scar that peaked out of his hairline. "He's not going to like this."

Apparently, Dagger was just as easily distracted as I was because he grabbed my hand as soon as I touched him. Maintaining his eye contact with me, he turned my hand over, palm up, and kissed the center of it. My eyes widened at how bold he was. But Dagger just gave me a lopsided grin in return.

Just then, the screen door in the kitchen slammed open and Benny came hobbling in. Dagger and I jerked away from each other, like two teenagers who'd been caught doing something we shouldn't have been. Of course, it wasn't like the old man could see us.

"Welp, kids, I think it's time for the human to go home. I just check the campsite where the other humans were and they're all gone.

"Thanks, Benny." Dagger stood up from the table and offered me his hand. "I'll take you home."

Taking his hand, I mumbled a goodbye to Benny before being pulled out of the cabin. Dagger led us towards a faded red pickup. One that I was definitely going to have issues climbing up into. Thankfully, Dagger apparently had already thought this through because after he opened my door, he lifted me up into the cab like I weighed nothing.

Once we were both in, Dagger started the pickup, which growled to life only to be drowned out by loud, rock music. It didn't sound familiar to me, but then again, I didn't really listen to rock music. Buckling my seatbelt, I glanced out the window and waited to head home.