C33: Summer

[ Friday, November 11 ]

I dropped my bag on my bed and Shawn, my cat, jumped on the bed and rubbed itself on my bag. The cat rolled over as if to entertain me. Adorable. That's the only word I can think of. This cat certainly knows how to make me smile.

I carried the cat and secured it in my arms and rubbed its head with my fingers. "I believe you're hungry," I said as I put the cat down and cut the pack of cat food open with a pair of scissors, pouring the content on the silver bowl and the feline rushed to the silver bowl to eat.

A few minutes later, I headed to the kitchen so that we can continue the plan of cooking together as sisters. I can't say that I'm 100% comfortable with Sasha because I don't trust people easily.

However, I'll give her a chance this time.

Sasha stepped into the house as I descend the stairs. She just arrived from school? She was supposed to be here for a couple of hours ago. But anyway, I don't want to meddle with her business. She must've gone somewhere else.

"So, you just came," I said as I meet her downstairs. She flashed a thin smile and broke an eye contact. I smell something fishy.

"Yes, I was from school," she replied, her eyes focused on our beautiful, shiny floor. I looked at the grandfather's clock to check the time and it flashes 6:30.

"6:30 pm. Not far from the time we agreed on. Amethyst should be back here perhaps in a few more minutes. We should start cooking." I tilted my head

and held Sasha's chin to raise it up. "You don't look so good. You look pale. Did something happen?"

Sasha stepped back in surprise, pressed her lips together and nodded. "Yes, it's fine. I guess I was just tired. But anyway, I'll drop my bag in my room and we'll start cooking. I'll be back in a heartbeat."

Something is not right. She couldn't look at me straightly, she flashes a fake smile. She isn't comfortable in answering. She is lying.

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I prepared the ingredients and had the recipe printed to make it easier to follow. Dad and mom will be coming at an hour, so all of these things should be cooked as soon as possible. Amethyst just peeked on the kitchen when she arrived and went upstairs to change her clothes.

For the Chicken in creamy mushroom sauce, Sasha and I prepared the butter, cooking oil, chicken thighs, flour, chicken stock, button mushrooms, salt, and pepper. Sasha began melting the butter in the pre-heated pan and she added some cooking oil. On the other hand, I sliced the button mushrooms just like how it was instructed in the recipe.

"Aw, crap!" I winced as I shook my hand and ran to the sink to wash my finger that I cut with a knife. It's really a shame that at this age – 26 – I still don't know how to cook. Sasha hurriedly ran towards me, holding a hand towel and wrapped it around my bleeding finger and she pressed it to stop bleeding.

"We should clean this and put some bandage or something like that," Sasha said, her eyes fixed on my finger.

It feels weird how she acted like she cares, which I think she does, for I hear sincerity in her words. It's just that I'm not that used with seeing that she actually cares.

Amethyst entered the kitchen and saw us. She narrowed her eyes as she saw us, her eyes curious about what's going on.

"We're having some kind of drama session, as you can see," I joked, even though my finger is killing me. "I don't think I can still cook, it really dead hurts. The wound in my finger is kinda deep, my fault."

Amethyst's face falls in disappointment, her eyes filled with worry as she walked closer to me to see my finger.

"Oh c'mon. Are we going to spend this night checking my finger? We better should be cooking."

"Right, of course. Sasha and I will. Just sit there and clean your wound, it shouldn't be that hard." Amethyst finally said as she stepped away to help Sasha with the cooking.

I sat on a chair and leaned my elbows on the bar, with Amethyst and Sasha on my view, helping each other cook. They laugh a bit as they share each other's stories as if nothing happened, which sure is a good thing. I want to believe that this only means that all of us had already moved on from the pains of the past. It feels like a fresh start, and it is.

Although what I don't get is, the idea of perfection just like now feels wrong. Sure, we're happy, everything seems to be fixed. But my gut is telling me that something's wrong. I don't know where I'm coming from – perhaps I'm overthinking – but that's what I feel. I guess it's because I still don't trust Sasha enough. I hate that I don't, but I guess I need more time to adjust.

The clock strikes at 9 pm, and everyone gathered on the table. The maids helped Sasha and Amethyst serve the dishes on the dining table, while everyone sits in their respective places.

Satisfied smiles appeared on mom and dad's lips, which happens to be contagious, making Amethyst and I do the same. However, Sasha's eyes were fixed on her plate, as if in deep thought. Just as I thought, something doesn't feel right. I know there is.

"You don't know how happy I am to see all of you like this. I am so pleased," mom began, looking at us one by one. Her smile was so warm, and joy is reflected in her eyes in match with her lips. Dad didn't comment but took some servings of the dishes that the two ladies cooked. Sasha finally raised her chin up. I can read that she wanted to say something, but she's hesitant to say it. To be honest, I cannot wait to hear it, knowing that my assumptions are right, after all.

"I, uh … I want to say something," Sasha finally spoke, her hands shaking as she holds her spoon and fork. Dad and Amethyst's eyes narrowed, suspicious of what she's about to say. "I'm sorry if I'll ruin the mood, but I believe all of you needs to tell me something. Something that will reveal who I really am and where I came from."

Mom gulped, while Amethyst and I looked at glanced at each other.

She knew? All this time? Since when did she know the truth?

"Well, why can't any of you say something?" she kept her cool, holding herself back from expressing emotions. If I were her, I would've felt the same, with the thought that for many years, my real identity was hidden, and I grew up to be someone I'm not.

"How did you know?" mom asked, not bothering to deny the truth.

"Does it really matter? The thing I don't understand is why. Why do you have to keep it? You know what hurts me? It's the fact that I feel like I've been lied to for 19 years. I have so many questions in mind, not just for all of you, but …" she paused, articulating her thoughts. "… but to my own biological mother herself."

A tear fell from mom's left eye, and she bit her lower lip. Dad remained silent, looking at nowhere. I don't know what he's thinking, but it's obvious that those aren't positive thoughts. It's all reflected on his face, even if he often has a blank facial expression. Disappointment and sadness still reflect in his eyes.

"I was planning to tell you a few months back, but I was afraid to so I wasn't able to say it," mom confessed her voice stuttering.

"What else should I know aside from the fact that I'm not your biological daughter?"

Mom heaved a breath and looked away, avoiding to see Sasha's eyes flooding with tears. I've always known that no secret will be a secret forever. However, I had no idea that things will be revealed this way. Truly, my intuition makes sense. I had no supporting facts, but I saw it coming.

Now, I'm no longer surprised. Amethyst didn't look surprised either – or maybe she is, only that she's trying not to involve herself to the heat of the issue.

"We have to talk. Follow me upstairs," Mom said as she stood up and pushed her chair back and left the dining room. Without any word, Sasha left her seat when mom stepped out of the room, leaving the three of us – Amethyst, dad and I.

"Well, that was some drama," I commented, breaking the silence. "I can't blame mom for keeping it though."

"I agree with that. It's not that easy to say, knowing how Sasha might react." Amethyst shrugged as she took some serving of the tofu and ate it with a spoonful of rice.

Dad didn't say a word but continued eating his meal. He holds an expression that I couldn't read. I can't see any hint of sadness or happiness unlike earlier, for his face was completely blank. Of all the people, I wanted to hear something from him because he's involved in this issue. But I guess everyone needs some fresh air to handle all of these things.