chapter 8

Bianca Halsall

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9: Can we keep each other company. Maybe we can try and be each others company.

His eyes, pinning me to place. His eyes, dark and gazing  in to my own. Those pink lips, parted and just a few inches away from mine.

He was so close, no actually, I was so close to giving in. I had to utter just one word, one fucking word and he'd be allowed to destroy me for any other man out there once again.

Just like before, I tried to get up, but he wouldn't let me. His fingers tightening in my black knots, another hand sliding down to grasp my thin waist. The sparks flying between us, singing melodies I've come to love and hate, reminding me, who it cries for.

Reminding me, who this sparks, nerves, goosebumps, excitement, lust, heat, desires, madness they belong to. No other man could do it all.

He was my first love, my first kiss, my first boyfriend, my first time, and became my first heartbreak. Strangely, my body knew deep down, he was also my last love.

"Let me worship your body tonight, baby." He whispers to me once again, looking deeply in to my eyes, watching the chaotic rounds of objections and nervousness running in them. "Let me love you tonight, my Bianca..."

I did not understand. A few days ago, his men came to inform us about his marriage, and even his housekeeper confirmed it, he did not deny it.

Then why? Why does he say things like this? Why does he keep hurting me? I don't know why I let him play with me, why it's so easy for him to take over my mind, but I'm determined to kill that part of me, the side that has had enough of his fucking games.

"Love?" I mocked, smirking up at him. The whispers of my words making our current situation tense. "You want to fuck me, whiles you're about to marry another. You're shameless, a complete two-faced asshole..."

I want to bring out an reaction from him, but my words didn't discourage him from looking down at me lustfully. It pissed me off, setting waves of fucking anger to shoot out.

Yes, I was incredibly turned on. My hormones where all over the place. After being deprived of an orgasm for two years, and finally getting it just a few days ago, with his hands, my body can't help but go mad crazy for the dickhead.

"Call me every bad word in the dictionary, bella..." Alessandro brought his face closer, my nose brushing his slightly. "... but once I have my cock shoved deeply in that tight wet pussy, that's been throbbing for me since our last love making-" he paused, adding dramatic effect to intimidate me. It did.

"-you'll beg me to go faster. You'll cry for me to go deeper,  rough and hard. Your pussy walls will suck my cock, clenching it deeply as it begs for more..."

By the end of his little speech, I was panting hard. My thighs clenched tightly together. The warm of my juices running down my inner thighs.

I squirmed underneath him, eyes round like sorcers, and now, I knew for sure, if I don't pick my words right, I'll end up letting him have his way with me.

"And guess what, piccola?" He raised a brow, cold lips landing on my hot neck. I shivered as he opened his mouth, tongue touching my naked neck. He sucked in the skin there, sensually taking his time as I grew red on the face, struggling to keep my moans in.

"....Faró l'amore con te come un pazzo."  He whispers seductively in Italian, my biggest weakness. I felt my walls crumbling down on me, and it buzzed the need and desire stored away for him. [Translation: I'll make love to you like a mad man.]

And just like that, like before, I could feel myself giving in to him, except this time, I was fully sober, not drunk, not intoxicated, and most certainly not high.

I was fucked. No. I am fucking fucked. I let him get to me. I let it run in my head, I let it all wonder around in my mind.

And here I was. Arching my back. Angling my neck, grinding my front. Lips parted, eyes shut tightly, rolled behind my lids.

I let him fuck me...

....I gave him full permission to my body.

"Tell me, baby?" He pushed. "Give me permission to make you feel good. To please you." Yup, that's when my brain decides to shut down, letting my horny side awake.

I didn't need to look in his eyes. My head nodded slightly, hesitantly, and that was it for him, and he ripped my shirt off.

I gasped, having less time to react before he had my nipple in his mouth. Sucking me into obligation. My toes curling, and there, I felt my heart flatter. Being reminded of her old lost lover. The same man she'd move the world to see happy.

The one person that loved me more than anything or anyone had ever. Yes, that was it. He wasn't playing fair, and I couldn't help but fall slowly for him once again.

I mess up all the fucking time.

Rule number one, don't fuck with him. Rule number two, don't fuck up rule number one.

What the fuck did my fucking heart do?

..... it's falling again. I'm breaking down my walls anger giving myself willingly to him. I'm fucking up.

Alessandro did the expected right after that. He took me for himself. He ravished my body, he used me thoroughly. I was not myself anymore, as his hot tongue rolled around my pink hard nipple.

I was a moaning mess.

He was so good at multitasking, I couldn't focus on one thing. This overwhelmed me and had my breath coming our in loud crazy pants. He was doing everything put of the ordinary. Everything he used to do to me, only difference is, this time had lost control.

I've deprived him of my body for far too long...

Fuck, he was starving.

"Alessandro... ngha!" My own moans did not hide the shame I felt. He was done with my nipples, loving each one equally. Alessandro, kissed down my breast, running his hot tongue from in between my breasts, down to the bottom of my belly-button.

He growled. "You taste amazing, piccola." He whispered, his left hand holding my left thigh up my chest. Alessandro stopped right in front of my covered core, probably smelling the burning passion I had waiting for him.

Nothing compared to the heated passion in his eyes as he looked up at me. "Look at me, baby." He demands, his right hand running up my stomach to catch my breast in his grasp. I bite down on my lip, refusing to as my eyes immediate shut, head slammed back down on the bed.

"No, no, Mia regina." He hissed, squeezing my breast harshly, making me jolt in pleasure and pain, mostly pain. "Eyes on me."

I swallowed, debating. My heart was picking up speed. I had no idea why he loved eye-contact during love making. This has always been a thing for him. Yes, I didn't mind it, but secretly, it made me nervous, and sometimes I felt inferior or self-conscious about myself.

Alessandro was a big man. His eyes held deepness of danger, dark intimacy, power, sexiness, lust and more than I can explain. I was scared to look in those eyes.

Because secretly I knew, if I let him fuck me like that, he won't only be fucking me, but breaking me....

....and I can't let that happen, I was too weak for him.

Sensing my hesitation to look at him, he released my breast, hand running down my side to stop at the hip. Before he started pulling down my pants slowly. "I see you haven't gotten this fear gone, baby." He whispers, making clench my jaw. "You still keep your eyes away from me. You're taking something that belongs to me away, Bianca..."

He was silent, a bit too silent for a while. My thigh was released, as was the pants, it dropped. And now there I was, naked with only a think thong on, doing nothing to cover me up.

"...and you should know I hate it when you don't submit to me, bella." I groaned, the more he talked, the angrier and lustful I got.

"You better get it over and done with before I-"

"Before you what?" He snapped right inveterate, coming up and hovering above my naked body. "Tell me, baby." He taunts, raising a brow. ".... what will you do, huh?"

I stifled a moan as he laid his hips to mine, and roughly grinds us together. My body quivering in bliss.  My eyes where still shut, an I could feel Alessandro on top of me.

I felt him lay his face in between my neck and shoulder. Inhaling shakily, and groaning. He laid a cold kiss on my shoulder, then up on my neck, going up to my chin,laying one on my cheek before I felt him lock my earlobe in his mouth and sucked.

"Ah-mmh!" I could keep them in, my moans where evidence that this was hard for me, that I was struggling to go with his pace. I wanted fast and hard.... not this.

This was something I'd kill not to do with him...

"A-Alessandro..." I whimpered, buckling our hips, following his hip movements as we kept grinding. It felt good, too good. If we went on, I'd probably orgasm like this.

By just dry-pumping...

This was dangerous, I had to do something. So I mastered the courage and grabbed his shaft, my hand going I'm his pants, he froze. "What are you-"

"Fuck me already, please." I practically cried, my eyes still heavily shut. "I can't go any longer, Alessandro, just... please." This, this is me begging my old lover to fuck me.

I've never had to beg someone. Seeing that Alessandro was my first and only, he's the only man that seen me vulnerable, kissed me, touched me, seen my most sacred parts and fucked me... made love to me...

Alessandro was silent, but then he got up, and my eyes flew open to catch him pull off his shirt, tossing it aside something on the floor. He grabbed my waist,pulling my body a bit up the bed like I weighed nothing.

Then his pants were off, leaving him in his boxers, I had to drool. This man was huge, I nearly forgot.

As all his work was done, he laid his elbow down near my head, and the other hand, grabbed my face with it. "Fine, but keep those eyes open for me, got it?"

I swallow, I couldn't do that!

I know what he's doing and it was dangerous territory if I obeyed him, and if I didn't....

I choked on my own spit, letting his brown honey eyes capture my green emerald ones. Goodness, this is bad, so bad. I had to stop this, I have to stop him or else-

"Keep those eyes on me, Bianca..." he said, befor traili his hand down from my face, running his cold finger on my skin. I felt him grasp my thong in his grasp.

I was ready for it, but he pulled. A soft scream left past my lips as the rubber snapped my skin, leaving me hot and probably red. He brought the broken piece of thong up before tossing it away.

It dawned, and I gulped.

I am fully naked in front of him, and vulnerable.... he can do whatever he wants and I won't stop him, I can't...

I felt his fingers on my clit, and he rubbed, feverishly. My eyes widens as he pressed harder on my now swallon throbbing hot clit.

I felt my lips part as I left out soft whimpers,  struggling to keep my eyes on his. This felt too intimate, I didn't like it. My hands wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer, our lips a few distance apart.

He had his eyes souly on mine, an I don't know why I felt the waves of emotions rush up to me like this, I was ready to beg him to stop making me feel this way, I couldn't break anymore than I've already broken.

But he wasn't having it, he ignored my pleading eyes...

"You're fucking gorgeous, baby." He rasped, not letting me look away from his eyes. "Bellissimo." (Translation: beautiful)

I wanted to cry, no actually, I cried as he increased his pace, before plugging his index and middle finger inside my pussy. I felt the wet sound it made as he immediate started pumping them inside of me.

My thighs immediately spreading open for him to go further, and I felt it. He added a third finger, and that was it for me, I arched my back, shutting my eyes and throwing my head back as I screamed.

"Alessandro! Ah, yes!" I cried out, biting harshly on my lips as the started spamming. My orgasm hitting me full force, knocking the wind out of me as I shook violently in his arms.

He rides out my orgasm, not sparing me as he keeps fucking me with his fingers roughly, knuckles deep. My hips pushes away from his fingers, wanting them off me because they started to hurt me, but he kept me in place, pumping his fingers repeatedly in me and prolonging my orgasm.

My stomach was clenched, teeth clamped down on my lip, eyes shut and rolled back, head rolling side to side,hips tense, sweat falling down my forehead, and in between my breast. "P-Please... stop." I begged him.

But no, he only stopped once my orgasm was fully over. Pulling his fingers off me, I laid motionless on the bed, completely defeated and wasted. My heart beat slowing down.

"I almost forgot how you get off my fingers, baby." I heard him chuckle, making me want to hide and never be found. He was humiliating me.... I knew he was.

I felt him shift, before he started caressing my face, my cheeks and forehead. "Open those eyes, piccola. Let me see you..."

With hesitation, I did just that. Slowly peeling my eyes open and letting him see what he'd down to me. He'd made me vulnerable once again, putty in his grasp. I shivered, watching the strong possessive emotions in his eyes. "Good girl." He whispers, and I wish I didn't like how that simple two word sentence made me feel.

I was scared.

Not scared of him, but of what he'd do. I was scared he'd broke me completely tonight. I was scared he'd use me till he had his fill and hump back to his new lovers arms. I was scared...

.... I was scared to show him that I still love him. Fuck.

Alessandro looked at me, before moving forward to claim my lips. It was soft and short, my arms tightening around him. As he pulled away, he pecked my chin. "We're not done yet, baby." He announced, making me tense.

"I-I can't..." I trailed off, I can't keep letting this go on.

"You can, bella. Yes, you can." He took my thighs in both his palms. Positioning himself in between my legs. "Alessandro, I'm... sore." I went for this excuse next, hoping he'd stop, but he was lost, his eyes on the mess I made in between my thighs.

"Don't worry, my love. I'll take good care of you." He went on before moving his hips towards me, the tip of his cock on my entrance. I was just about to shut my eyes when he growls. "Eyes open and on me, Bianca."

What ws he trying to do to me?!

I shook my head, keeping my eyes shut, but he growled, making me snap my eyes open. "Eyes. On. Me." He repeated.

And as I nodded, letting my eyes meet his, with tears in them, he started pushing in, slowly. My body tensed, an I parted my lips. The look in his eyes could kill me. I felt him in me. I felt my walls suck him. I felt the veins on his cock pulse, I felt how big he is, I felt the soft beat of our hearts as our chest were smashed together. I felt a tear slip the corner of my eye. I felt his eyes speak to my soul.

...I felt everything. All of him.

Maybe I was suffocating as he finally hit the end, fully in me. Goodness, I felt too full. "Merda." He cursed, keeping his eys on mine. (Translation: shit)

We both took out shaky breaths before he pulled out slowly. Moving his hips sensually, letting his cock caress my walls, till the tip was left inside. An just with the same pace, he pushed in. Slowly, sensually.

Shit, I knew what he was going to do.

He's going to make love to me.

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